Disclaimer: I do not own the X-Men or the other cast of X-Men Evolution. I do not own Koolaid. . . I do own Raven, Rachel and Lightning.
Reviews:
To kyo-kitty: Thank you very much. Yeah, well, the parade was canceled and they were too tired to stay up to see the fireworks. . . Poor things, but the oldest is only 3 so they've got plenty of fireworks to watch later. I got a new VCR. It'll be harder, but I can still do it. But now I'm confused with another one, I'd love to see Romyed. Thumbellina. . .
To Cat2Fat900: Thank you. That said. . . (get down on knees and begs) Please, please, please do not burn the camp down! Okay, now as for the review. . . Rocky likes them. He has a little friend too that hasn't been named yet. Oh, you like Raven better? So do I. That was the point of the "as if he wasn't tall enough." Poor Pyro, they laughed at him. Which was half of the reason to bring Rachel in. lol. Had to get Scott drunk somehow. Lol. Yeah, we all must have our Romyness. . . I know that, but it's only a play. I'm not sure about the squealing, but I'm assuming they teach it in the Mandatory Evil Insane Villain Classes. He doesn't, he just got lucky. I must give you ammunition. I don't know why exactly, but I must. . . I'm working on it, hon.
To Crash Slayer: Well, I hope you had a good holiday anyway. I never really thought of it that way. . . I think 90 of Evo fans hate EvoScott. Well, it does fit with Pyro's personality. I use the dictionary on any word Hank defines. . .I'm not sure how he fit, but Little John did, so Piotr did. I love good Scott abuse. :) Ya certainly don't hear it often. . . Smercial? Do I even want to know? That's their little secret. Lol. This all sprouted from a mistake on Disney's part in which Klucky is in one scene, not in the next, and then again after a bit, right back where she was originally. I'd try and help you out there, but you are probably not too far off base on that one. . . I'm gonna say yes, yes you are. Don't worry, I'm the one writing this stuff! He is much bigger, but I bet they're the same strength-wise. Kitty's cooking can do anything, except feed people. Thanks for the review.
To Sweety8587: I forgive you. I know it's been messing up for you for a while. Too bad I can't put the song in! Ugh, but oh well, it'll work out somehow.
To Lyrit Liltrick: I'm not sure. I had to listen closely to find the second phrase. Good thing I know un peu de francais. However, the first phrase, I was really confused over. Of course he can't win, where's the fun in that? Thank you kindly.
To Chained2aMask: Scott torment is so much fun! Raven is busy. . . and the less said about that the better, though I think if E.V.A.N. Is still reading this, she might be able to take a wild guess. I've only seen Ocean's 11 like once, and I've never seen Ocean's 12, let alone own either of them. So, I can't do them. I am thinking off extending the parodies to any movie that can be Romyed though. Thank you very much.
To Hunza: Thank you very much. :)
A/N: Well, parade was canceled and my little tykes couldn't make it to 9:45 to watch the fireworks. But we had a fun day, anyway. The next part of the movie is several songs, and it bugs me cause I have to cut them out! Ugh, but I'll be combining several scenes and describing the actions of the songs anyway. Heh, heh, Raven is back!
Remy Hood
Scene 7: The Sherwood Forest Party.
When Raven and Lightning walk into the studio, they are in the middle of a fight. "I can't believe you brought Rachel in to replace me!" she shouts.
"No, not to replace you. That's not what I said at all." He shakes his head.
"Oh, then, what would you call it?"
"She was just, um, temporarily taking your place. . ."
"Replacing me!"
Kurt walks up to them, "If it means anyzing, she did a lousy job at it."
"Well, thank you, Uncle Kurt." Raven says grinning at him. "But that doesn't make me feel any better about the fact that my fiancée decided to replace me just because I was. . ." She stops suddenly. "Oh, well, it doesn't matter where I was."
"What do you mean fiancée?" Remy asks, startled.
"Did I say fiancée? I meant ex-boyfriend!"
"Yeah, right, like you'd really break up with me over a play." Lightning quips.
"Don't try me." She says right back.
"Fiancée?" Remy asks again, looking rather pale.
"Let's just get to work, and no one piss me off! I'm in a bad enough mood already!" Raven shouts.
"Better you than me," Evan says to Lightning. After which, Raven promptly charges a card and throws it at him. Evan screams and runs away.
The explosion has started a small fire. Pyro is leaning over it, laughing heartily, until Bobby freezes it. "Ah, did ya really have ta do that, mate?" He looks about ready to cry.
"I'll comfort you." Wanda says with an evil grin. Pyro screams and runs away. Wanda chases him laughing.
"Lights!" Raven calls, forcing everyone to settle down. "Camera! Action!"
The scene opens on a lovely wood. Fireflies light the air around our favorite couple. Forge pops in a prerecorded copy of Rogue singing, "Love. It seems like only yesterday. . ." Rogue and Remy run through the wood, holding hands, until they reach and bank. Remy stops and helps Rogue down gently. They are still holding hands and smiling. Both of them have nearly forgotten they are being filmed. Rogue watches the fireflies as Remy watches her face.
They walk near a stream. There is a small tree in their way. Rogue walks on one side and Remy walks on the other. He leans on the tree and looks at her. They let go of the other's hand and Remy brings a gloved hand to Rogue's face. She thrills at his touch, even though it's behind gloves. She then leans her own head against the tree.
The scene changes to a close up of the stream, where a bunch of lily pads have made their home. The camera moves up until Rogue and Gambit's reflections are seen staring lost into each other's eyes. Then the camera focuses on them, instead of their reflections. A closeup is show of their hands, while Remy slips a flower ring onto Rogue's gloved ring finger. She lifts her hand up to look at it and a firefly lands right in the middle of the flower, lighting it up beautifully.
Technically, they aren't using real fireflies, but little inventions of Forge's making that happen to look just like fireflies. Needless to say, Pyro loves the little flying lights.
Rogue looks up from her hand to Remy's face. He's smiling at her, lost in her emerald orbs. She smiles back. When she closes her eyes, the scene cuts to a waterfall. They walk along stones to reach behind it.
Behind the waterfall is a cave, and Remy leads Rogue through it, holding her hand again. On the other side of the cave, is Remy's hideout. Rogue stares at the mess table and tons of laundry, hanging all around the camp. "Oh, Remy," she sighs, "What a beautiful night." She allows herself to be caught in his arms, "Ah wish it would neveh end," she says truthfully.
That's when Kurt ports in, "Surprise! Long live Remy Hood!"
"Hooray!" Rahne and Sam call out.
Scott screams in pain and fear even though he knew it was coming. It was in the script. Raven glares at him with glowing yellow eyes. He runs away.
Sam cries out, "And long live Maid Anna!"
"Bravo! Bravo!" Rahne calls.
By this time, the other cast members have come out of hiding. "Hear, Hear! Bravo, bravo! Hooray!" comes from the crowd who are all clapping their hands and jumping up and down in excitement.
Kitty sits on a branch of a large tree. Piotr had lifted her up there earlier. She calls out, holding her thumbs down, "And, like, down with that, like, scurvy Prince John!"
"Da," Piotr says, sliding up next to her with a flirty face and a badly-made lute. Kitty smiles at him lovingly. She jumps down as Piotr starts to sing, "Oh, the vorld vill sing of a Bayville King, a thousand years from now. . ." Kitty is following him and Kurt is following her. They are all dancing to the music of Piotr's lute. Raven his placing earplugs in both her and Lightning's ears.
"Hey, why can't I have earplugs?" Logan asks, through the pain.
"Me too!" X23 cries out.
"I want earplugs, too!" Sabretooth howls.
Raven looks at Lightning, "I'd be mad at them, but I really can't blame them." She gives each one of them earplugs as well.
Piotr is glaring at them, but goes back to his song. Rahne is dancing behind Kurt. A band plays along. Logan, in his chicken suit, is playing another, better tuned, lute. Three other Jaime clones are playing drums, a flute, and a bass guitar. "Vhile bonny good King Charles leads the great crusade he's on. . ."
Rogue dances with Ray, who has some trouble since he's still wearing the cast. Piotr sings about how Pyro is the phony king of Bayville, while dancing with more Jaime clones.
"A pox on the phony king of Bayville!" all the cast shouts out at the proper time. Scott's screams coming from his dressing room can be heard through the earplugs.
Piotr pulls aside a piece of laundry and reveals a hollow tree. Kurt ports to it and sticks up a puppet of Pyro, made with two brooms, the head of a scarecrow, and a paper crown. Kurt is laughing. He bounces the puppet up and down until the crown falls over the puppet's face. He looks at it strangely and fixes it, while everyone laughs and then hides again. Jubilee, Amara, and Evan all point and laugh at him.
The puppet bows to it's audience and then another puppet joins him. This one is a Scott Sock Puppet on Ray's arm. Piotr sings about how Pyro pretends to be a king. The Scott Puppet acts like it's talking back to the Pyro Puppet. Kurt sticks his hand through the Pyro Puppet's sleeve and grabs the Scott Puppet, pulling him down and then takes out a stick. Kurt starts hitting the Scott Puppet on the head. Piotr sings about Pyro throwing tantrums when he can't have his way. The Scott Puppet grabs the stick and hits the Pyro Puppet on the head. Piotr sings about him calling for his Mom and sucking his thumb. Kurt puts one hand on the puppet's ear and the other in front of the puppet's mouth and makes it look like he's sucking his thumb. Jubilee, Amara, and Evan are rolling on the ground with laughter.
The scene cuts to Duncan and Taryn laughing, because they are too afraid of Raven to do otherwise. "Too late to be known as John the First, he is sure to be known as John the worst!" cries out Piotr. The Scott Puppet hits the Pyro Puppet again and tears the scarecrow head open. Kurt holds it up in amazement.
Ray stands up in shock as well. "Oops." he says, shrugging.
"Lay that country on me, babe." Piotr says to Logan. Piotr finally having given up on the lute, with much relief from those with sensitive ears. Logan plays his solo proudly. The whole band plays as well.
"Come on, Piotr," Kitty says, grabbing his hand and dancing with him. "Go, laddie, like, go!" She laughs. "Oh, oh, oooh!" she cries out when Piotr dips her.
Duncan and Taryn dance next to Logan with frightened looks on their faces.
Rogue dances up close to Remy who smiles at her. Kitty and Piotr are still dancing together. The camera returns to Rogue. Then to a Jaime clone, playing yet another lute! Then back to Rogue and Remy dancing. Then, back to the band.
When Piotr starts singing again, Rogue is sitting at the table and clapping her hands. "Vhile he taxes us to pieces and . . ." he sings on. The real Jaime comes and asks Rogue to dance. She accepts. People gather around and watch them dance. "A minute before he knows ve are there, " Piotr tells Bobby, patting him on the head, "Old Rem, vill snatch his underwear." He points to the Pyro Puppet which is stuck in the ground now and Remy is climbing into the underwear. The paper crown flies up and lands on Remy's head. Everyone laughs. Rogue and the others continue to dance when Piotr starts singing again. The crowd eventually forms a crowd around Rogue and Remy while they dance. The scene cuts to the waterfall again. "Prince John, that phony king of Bayville!" Piotr sings. After he finishes, those of them who wore earplugs removed them.
The scene fades to the inside of a castle. Sabretooth, still wearing the electric shock device in his costume, walks in singing the words to the previous song, Scott is sitting at a desk, writing. He is surrounded by bags of chocolate coins. Some are melting. Sabretooth walks up to him, still singing, He plops a bag of money on the desk. "How about that?" he asks Scott.
Scott has closed his eyes and removed his glasses. "That's PJ to a 'T.' Let me try. Let me try." He clears his throat, and replaces his glasses. He is now free to open his eyes. He starts singing about how Pyro is too late to be know as John the first, and is sure to be known as John the worst, when he looks up and sees Pyro standing in the doorway. He gulps. "The fabulous, marvelous, merciful, chivalrous. . ."
Sabretooth cuts him off, not having noticed Pyro standing behind them in his blue robe. "Oh, you got it all wrong, Scott." He places his hands on his hips. "The sniveling, groveling, weaselly, measly. . ."
He is cut off by Pyro's angry yell, "Enough!" Pyro is holding a pitcher of Koolaid. He throws it at Sabretooth's head.
Creed ducks and the pitcher smashes against a pillar instead. "But, but, sire, it's a big hit." he says. "The whole village is singing it."
"Oh, they are, are they?" Pyro asks angrily. "Well, they'll be singing a different tune," he says as he sticks his face up into Sabretooth's. "Double the taxes! Triple the taxes!" he shouts. Scott nods knowingly, until Pyro grabs his throat and starts choking him. "Squeeze every last drop out of those insolent, musical peasants."
The scene changes to one where Storm has created a rain storm around the castle. Everything is dark and dreary. Logan's voice is heard in a voice over. "Man-o-man," he says. "Prince John sure made good his threat." Thunder claps. "and his helpless subjects paid dearly for his humiliation, believe me, bubs."
The scene changes to a couple of Jaime clones leaving a house with a sign on it that read, "Foreclosure by order of the crown."
"Taxes, taxes, taxes." rants Logan. "Why he taxed the heart and soul out of the poor people of Nottingham."
The scene changes to Lance sitting on top of a gallows in the rain and Sabretooth leaning back in a chair, sleeping under and awning, outside the prison gate, out of the rain. "And if you couldn't pay your taxes," Logan continues. "you went to jail." The scene changes to Logan, in his chicken suit, looking out a barred window. "Yup, I'm in here too, and I ain't too happy about it!"
"Logan!" Raven says calmly. "Kindly refrain from adding more lines to the script before I tear out your heart and feed it to Sabretooth." Sabretooth smirks at him.
"Hmph, you could try." Wolverine mutters.
"Perhaps I should!" She says with glowing eyes. She starts to float above her chair.
"Uh, t'at's okay, Raven. We don't need a demonstration of your powers right now." Remy says, trying to calm her. "Wolvie is very sorry, are you Wolverine."
Logan nods, frightened by the young girl's anger. Raven calms down and glares at him. "You are lucky I'm such a Daddy's girl. In this mood, I'd normally tear anyone apart who dares to oppose me."
"Thanks a lot, Lightning." Piotr groans.
Lightning sinks back into his seat. "Perhaps we could just get back to the play," he says weakly.
Logan takes the hint, "Nottingham was in deep trouble." The scene changes to the inside of the prison cell, where Logan is wearing a ball and chain and starts singing, "Every town, has it's ups and downs. . ." He sits on the ball and the camera pans out to see Duncan and Taryn in lots of chains. Plus other members of the cast and lots of Jaime clones. Duncan, who can barely move because of all the chains, places a blanket on Taryn's shoulders. Jean, slowly feeds a Jaime clone. Water falls on Bobby's hat and drips onto Evan's head. It's driving Evan nuts. Jubilee and Amara cuddle up, asleep. One Jaime clone is eating while another Jaime clone watches hungrily. He gives the other a part of his cookie. Ray lays on a bed of hay, while Storm leans over him, trying to feed him. Logan stands up again, still singing. Outside the prison, Sabretooth has woken and is holding the door open as four Jaime clone in prison uniforms march slowly into the prison with their legs attached to a large chain and carrying large hammers. They drag a large ball behind them.
The scene then changes to the church where a bell tolls. Inside, Kurt is pulling the rope. Sam, sits at the organ. "Friar Kurt," he sighs, "Ah don't think anyone's coming."
"You're right, Sam, but maybe ze sound of zis church bell vill bring zose poor people some comfort." He stops ringing the bell and walks into the main sanctuary. "Ve must do vhat ve can to keep zeir hopes alive."
Sam nods from the organ and Kurt walks over to the poor box. Rahne is sweeping a rug in front of a part of the church that is used as an apartment for her and Sam. "Oh," she sighs, "how can there be any hope with that tyrant Prince John taxing the heart and soul out of the poor people?"
"Ja, zose poor people." Kurt says, opening the box. He sighs sadly. "Look, our poor box is like our church, empty."
Rahne looks sad and runs into her apartment. She lifts her mattress and grabs the only thing under it, a single coin. Rahne looks at it for a moment and then goes out the door and brings it to Kurt. "Friar Kurt, we've saved this. It's not much, but please take it, for the poor."
"Your last farzing?" Kurt asks. "aw, little sister, no one can give more zan zat." He takes the coin and places it in the poor box. "Bless you both."
"Oh," Sam says, embarrassed, "we were just saving it fer a rainy day."
"Vell," Kurt says, glancing at the church's broken window. "It's raining now." He laughs. "Zings can't get worse."
Just then, Sabretooth walks in. "Howdy, Friar," he growls. Sam stops playing. "Well, it looks like I dropped by just in time."
"What does that big-bellied bully want here?" Sam asks angrily.
"Sam, shh!" Rahne pleads.
They soon find out what he wants, when he goes straight to the poor box and opens it. He pulls out the coin. "Hmm. Well want have we got here?"
"Now, just a minute, Sheriff!" Kurt says, wagging his finger at Sabretooth, "Z, z, zat's ze poor box!"
"It sure is," Sabretooth says grinning. "and I'll just take it for poor Prince John." He puts it in his pocket. "Every little bit helps."
"Ooh, you put that back!" Rahne yells.
"And His Majesty also blesses you, little sister." Sabretooth growls.
"You thieving scoundrel!" Kurt shouts, raising his fist.
"Now take it easy, Friar. I'm just doing my duty." Sabretooth says pretending to try and reason with the fuzzy demon.
"Collecting taxes for zat arrogant, greedy, no-good Prince John?" Kurt yells.
"Listen Friar, you're mighty preachy, and you're going preach your neck right into a hangman's noose." He wags his finger in Kurt's face.
"Get out of my church!" Kurt screams in anger. "Out! Out! Out! Out!" He screams, pushing Sabretooth with every "Out!"
Sabretooth responds with an, "Ooh!" at every push. Kurt manages, with Raven's helps, to push Sabretooth out into the graveyard.
"Oh, dear me." Rahne cries, running to the door.
"You want taxes?" Kurt yells. Sabretooth has drawn his cardboard sword and Kurt has a big stick. He tries to hit Sabretooth with it, but it block by Sabretooth's sword. "I'll give you taxes!" He manages to hit Sabretooth on the head really hard.
"Ow!"
"Give it ta him! Give it ta him! Give it ta him, Friar!" shouts Sam from the church door.
Sabretooth grabs the stick and breaks it. Lance is watching from a tree. He jumps down and pulls Kurt's hood down over his face. Sabretooth grabs a shackle and places it around Kurt's neck. "You're under arrest for high treason to the crown." Sabretooth snarls.
"Oh, no!" Rahne says, holding on to Sam's arm. She starts crying.
Sam puts his arms around her. "Oh. There, there, Rahne."
Kurt is led away in chains by Sabretooth with Lance close on his heels, pointing a crossbow at him.
Logan's voice is heard again, singing the same sad song as before. Rahne and Sam watch them led Kurt away.
"And cut!" Raven sighs, relieved it went as well as it did. "That went a little better than usual."
"Just because they were all afraid of you." Lightning retorts.
"And it was you who put her in a bad mood, wasn't it?" Rogue says, slanting her eyes at him.
"Yeah," says half the cast. Scott screams and runs out of the studio.
"Remy says we get him!" Gambit cries out.
"Yeah!" they yell again.
Lightning starts backing away slowly. "Uh, Raven? A little help here?" He gulps.
"Why?" She says calmly. "After all, you do have a healing factor."
"But, but, but. . ."
She raises her eyebrow. He can tell she doesn't intend on helping him. He takes off at a dead run. Unfortunately for him, Pietro was one of the many who was angry with him.
Raven grins. "That ought to teach him not to replace me." She almost laughs, but catches herself as she hears his cries of pain as they catch up to him. She backs into the shadows. We will leave them there. . . .
A/N: Well, that was fun. Raven doesn't like being replaced. Sorry, to leave you all in such a dark place, but these scenes just couldn't stand on their own. Next up: Remy learns of the plan to hang Kurt and comes to the rescue!
Please review:)