0isclaimer: I do not own the rights to Artemis Fowl. All rights go to Eoin Colfer.

Okay, I admit that Mulch's comment was a bit gruesome, but in Mulch's mind, it's true. He's just not very subtle. And for those of you that like Alexis, here's your chapter. : ) For those of you that don't like Alexis, here's your chapter.

Chapter 5: Ba Ba Black Sheep

Vanderbelt Summer home, Ireland

Alexis Vanderbelt hated her brother. It seemed as if Alex's sole purpose in life was to ruin her own. At first it wasn't so bad, but ever since he had been potty trained and could walk, all he did was torment her. This summer was the worst.

Alex had gotten lots of birthday presents, but the prize pig was his digital camcorder. And his only cinematic interest was Alexis. Today's video had been Tricking the Innocent Older Sister Into a Mud Puddle. No, a better title was Trick the Innocent Older Sister Wearing All White Into the Mud Puddle. That video was the reason Alexis sat in her room, scrubbing the cuffs of her white Capri pants. The mud puddle was only deep enough to soak her lower legs, but it was the evil intentions that counted.

Her day hadn't improved when she learned about what her brother did with some of the videos. Alex had put them on the Internet. Well, only one video to be precise. Her first kiss was now on the world wide web.

"One day, Alex, one day," Alexis muttered. She vainly hoped that either she would get revenge or a new brother, but the latter might just cause more trouble. Suddenly, a braying from outside caught her attention. Sheep, she thought.

The Vanderbelt summer home was very spacious, with a practical forest surrounding it. However, on one side was a farm. And not just any farm. A sheep farm. Alexis had visited the farm often, and knew just about everything there was to know about sheep. The only surprise was that they were pretty smart, and often escaped their fences. The farmer had decided that for every sheep the Vanderbelts caught, he would give them ten dollars for their trouble. In recent years, it had become a contest between Alex and Alexis to make more of a profit.

Well, looks like I'll get a one up on the little twit, Alexis thought. She grabbed a jacket and pulled it over her white tank top, and headed to the door. Wait, she thought, as she realized that it was her parents' movie night. Alex would be there too. He'd wonder what she was up too. How do I get out without him?

A warm breeze through the open window presented the answer. There were vines all over the house, and she'd always wanted to climb them…Why not? She pondered. It'll be fun.

It'll be fun, Alexis thought, lying on her back outside her house. The vines had been weakened by all the pesticides the caretaker used, and hadn't even been strong enough to support her slight body. Now she was staring at the lovely constellations above her. With a grunt of effort, she got up, swaying slightly. She winced as she tenderly put weight on each foot. Nothing broken, just a bruised ego. A bah came from her right, and Alexis quickly set out after the sheep.

Each step was careful and calculated. Since her shoes had been ruined earlier, she hadn't thought of shoes. Although she'd walked these smooth paths barefoot before, it seemed that this time every stray pebble and twig was lying on this path. Still, she persevered. It wasn't just the money she wanted for the sheep, or even rubbing her brother's face in it, but the end of her parents' property was at some rocky outcroppings and a cliff. She knew that a sheep could easily tumble over. It had happened once before when she was younger.

Alexis reached a clearing, the last before the cliff. Most sheep stopped to eat or frolic, but this one hadn't. Some bushes across the clearing rustled, and she knew that was where the sheep was. She ran across the clearing, not caring about the sharp stones. The sheep was about to go over the cliff. As she reached the thicket, a voice seemed to enter her head. Was someone singing?

She stopped, listening intently. Yes, there was a voice. Someone was calling the sheep. She raced through the remaining trees, and stopped, looking at the sheep, walking dreamily to a small figure, draped in shawls. The figure reached out and pet the sheep, which Alexis now realized was only a lamb. It's wool was pure white, save for one little black mark on it's hind leg. This lamb was called Star, and Alexis knew that it wasn't exactly the brightest. How did this one get away? She thought. All the lams go to a different barn with thicker fences. Maybe this person stole Star!

"Hey, you're on private property, uh, person," Alexis squinted. She couldn't tell if it was a boy or girl. It was some kid though, not even three feet tall. Maybe a friend of Alex that didn't get picked up.

"Do you believe in magic?" A voice asked. It was a girl. But the voice didn't match the body. It seemed older.

"Excuse me? Are you lost, because I can get my parents and--"

"I want you to come with me, Alexis," the girl calmly looked up. Her hood fell back, revealing two pointed ears.

"Whoa, what are you?" She turned to run but the creature was coming towards her now.

"You're going to come with me Alexis. We're going to meet some people, magical people." The mesmer was strong in her voice. Alexis' mind struggled like a swimmer for air. No, this was wrong.

"You're so smart Alexis. It's better if you just relax. Haven't you always wanted to meet fairies? You'll get to meet my sister too. Now got to sleep." The voice laughed as Alexis slumped to the ground, sound asleep.

The pixie stared at the sleeping Mud Girl. Aww, how cute. She wiped a bead of sweat from her face. The girl had been tough, and it had taken a lot out of her. She raised a hand, signaling the hidden goblins to come. They preceded to tie Alexis up while the pixie contacted her boss.

"Sister Koboi, we have the girl," she said not looking directly at the screen. It was bad for Opal's skin to be looked at.

"Good Sister Amber. Bring her to me at once," the other pixie said. "Let me see her now though."

"Yes, Sister Koboi." She directed the screen towards the goblins and the Mud Girl.

"Very good. No marks on her though," Opal commanded, and turned off her receiver.

"Of course, Sister Mud," Amber said. Ever since losing her magic and becoming human, Opal Koboi had only her gold, and that was the only reason that Amber still worked for Opal. That, and the ragged ring around her iris'. She didn't know it, but she had been mesmerized so many times before Opal's downfall that she would still be easily influenced by Opal for years to come.

She watched as the goblins finished tying Alexis, and signaled for them to head back to the terminal. The terminal in question was under repair, and it took only a few gold ingots to clear out the construction crew for a few hours. Amber took off before the goblins, speedily zipping along in her DoubleDex wings. Now, the plan begins, she thought. And, she thought with a smile, Opal will have another Mud Girl for company. Someone she could relate too. She looked at the photo of Alexis she had been given. Actually, it looked as if this Mud Girl's ears were pointier. Amber laughed on her way back to the terminal, her head full of Mud Girl jokes, each one to be used behind Opal's back.

This chapter was a little short, but Chapter 6 should be longer. : ) And Opal just can't find good help anymore. : )