Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to Artemis Fowl. Those go to Eoin Colfer.

Okay, I have decided that upon finishing this whole fic, I will write a sequel. But only once this is done.

Chapter 10: A Hot Bath

E18

Artemis gingerly opened his eyes. Immediately, he regretted his decision. After a quick glance to analyze the situation, he realized how grim the predicament was. He was tied to the bars of a large, metal cage. Butler was at his side, but was in chains rather than rope. On his left, Foaly was tied on the bottom of the cage, and should have been resting on the floor. Artemis grimaced as he noticed that each of Foaly's hooves was dangling from the cage into the abyss below. Looking up, he noted that the cage was being suspended on a length of chain hanging from a crane-like structure. Attached to the chain, hanging like a potted plant, was a viewing monitor. A wave of fear washed over him as he realized that the cage was inside one of the chutes. If a flare were to come, all of the occupants would be roasted.

He struggled to remember the events that had brought him here. Foaly was monitoring the radio waves, hoping for Holly to make contact. There had been nothing but static silence. For a while, they simply believed that there was just nothing to report, and after a few moments they heard her coming back on board. But it was a goblin that came around instead. Artemis winced as he remembered getting shocked by some super charged buzz baton in the back. If no one had healed him, it could leave a scar. Instinctively, he tried to reach for the injured spot, but he found that he was bound too tightly to move his arms at all.

With another glance at his companions slump forms, he guessed that he was the first to regain consciousness. Either that, or he was the last and everyone else had fallen asleep. He hoped that it was the former rather than the latter. Artemis was relieved that it took only a few more minutes for everyone else to awaken.

"Five more hours, Mommy," Mulch murmured before his eyes snapped open. Everyone pretended that it hadn't happened, but not before Foaly let out a small snort, earning Mulch's angry gaze.

"Is everyone okay?" Butler asked. As the companions nodded, the screen flickered to life.A pixie appeared upon the bright screen.

"I certainly hope so," Amber said, her voice practically dripping with false sincerity. "It would be a shame, after all the trouble I went through to get you these nice accommodations."

"Oh, yes, thank you ever so much," Mulch called mockingly. He screen swiveled to face him.

"What did you say?" She demanded, and it looked to Artemis as if she was loosing her patience. "What happened to the tape? I told those goblins to--"

"Oh, I ate it. Things don't stick to dwarf beards very well, darling." Amber's face turned red. "You see, our beards--"

"Hey! Hey! I'm talking to you! Listen to me! Listen to me!" she screamed, interrupting Mulch's history of beards. The group exchanged amused glances as the pixie tried to regain her composure. "As I was saying, there is a lovely view here, and no complimentary breakfasts, but there is hot lava," Amber cackled. "When the next flare comes, it'll burn you all!"

"Actually," Artemis interrupted, "the pyroclastic flow would kill us first. Not the magma. Isn't that right Foaly?"

"Indeed it is Arty," Foaly said, eager to annoy Amber. Her face was already a bright red, and for a moment the centaur was reminded of Julius. "There is even a chance that the poisonous volcanic fumes could get to us first, depending on the size of the flare. And Amber, until it reaches the surface, it is called magma."

"I don't care!" Amber squeaked in her anger. "I just want you all to perish! But before you are killed, I thought that I'd let you know Miss Koboi's trial is tomorrow, and the prosecution seems to have lost their best witnesses. And I have a little surprise planned."

"I suppose we have to encourage her," Mulch murmured. "What have you planned?"

"Oh, nothing. Just a little goblin rebellion and a time-stop around a certain courthouse. But that's it, really," Amber sighed just as something started to ping. Her face lit up. "Oh!" She squealed. "It appears that a flare will be arriving in two hours time. And I should warn you, that chain has a tendency to slip It might even drop your cage. I'll just leave death to you then. Toddles!" the screen blacked out.

"I thought she'd never leave," Trouble said. He stood up, and turned to help Alexis up as well. Pausing only to remove the final ropes that were resting on him, he headed over to Holly.

"How did you get free?" Holly asked quietly, in case Amber was still monitoring them.

"With this," Trouble said. He held up a sharp, flat stone that he pressed against her ropes, and he started sawing through them. "She threw it at me, and didn't realize that I could use it to cut myself loose."

For a moment, Holly waited in silence for her bonds to be cut. But slowly, Trouble's words seeped in. She looked at his shoulder, dark with dried blood. He doesn't have any magic, she realized. With a start, she realized that she didn't either. When Amber had shocked her, there were no blue tendrils of magic racing across her body. Foaly, like all centaurs, didn't have any magic, and Mulch, who should have magic, didn't due to his violations of the Book. So unless Alexis was a child of Frond deep down, there weren't going to be any healings soon.

The Mud Girl in question was trying to untie Artemis' knots across the cage. She was making progress, but it was slow goings. After a moment, Holly realized that she was free. Trouble went over to Foaly while Holly started to untie Mulch. A little rock couldn't do anything against Butler's chains, but Mulch's beard could in a second. To her surprise, Mulch had almost finished untying himself.

"I know how to escape on my own, thank you," he smirked. Rubbing his wrists, he headed over to Butler, and discovered three padlocks. He started to unlock them when the cage gave a jolt. For a moment, everyone stopped moving. After a few seconds, the companions started working again. Artemis went to help Mulch and Butler, and Holly went to help Trouble get Foaly to balance on the bottom bars.

Looking over, Holly saw how helpless Alexis looked. She was the only one with nothing to do, and no idea what was even going on. With surprise, Holly noticed the girl was shivering. She realized that the air seemed much cooler than it had before. That could only mean that the flare was coming earlier than Amber said.

"Foaly," Holly dropped her voice to a whisper, not wanting to upset the others. "Does the air feel cooler?"

Both his eyes and Trouble's opened wide as they understood what she meant.

"We need a plan," Trouble said. The cage shook again, and Holly and Trouble quickly took hold of Foaly so that his hooves wouldn't slide through the cage again. However, they failed, and Foaly fell unceremoniously down.

"Are you wearing your Moon Belt?" Foaly said, gazing up at Trouble. The major simply nodded. "Then we have a plan. Everybody listen up" Foaly called. Both Artemis and Mulch stopped trying to free Butler for a moment. They had found more padlocks that were more difficult to open and it was time consuming.

"Once Butler is free, we're going to swing the cage back into the Sisterhood shuttle port." Foaly pointed, and Holly saw that the base of the crane supporting the cage was resting there. "If we're lucky, the cage will break upon impact. If not, Mulch can unlock it."

"A good plan, but I don't believe that even Butler could swing this cage in. And we can't all grab on, or we would be unable to all release the chain at the same time," Artemis pointed out.

"Well, that's true. Too many cooks spoil the soup," Foaly said. "But, If we use this Moon Belt, then it just might work."

"It's better than waiting around for death. At least we'll have tried Artemis," Butler said quietly to his young charge.

"Alright. We'll try your plan Foaly," Artemis said at last. "But first we have to free him and set him up with the Belt."

While everyone headed over to Butler to add the final detailing to the plan, Alexis stood alone in a corner. She walked slowly over to the center of the cage. Although she was frightened for her life, she couldn't hold back childlike wonder at seeing a real centaur. She'd hoped that this was all just a nightmare, but if it was real, and there were centaurs, then there might be unicorns somewhere. Her dazed thoughts were interrupted by the chain suddenly swinging violently. Below her feet, Alexis heard a loud rumble. Her head filled with everything she knew about volcanoes. The hook slid from the bar it supported, and Alexis realized that the cage was about to plummet into the oncoming lava.

Time seemed to slow around her. Butler was still under one layer of chain, but he would be free in a moment to execute the plan the centaur had proposed. But if there was nothing to swing with, the plan would fail. Even though her mind screamed at her to be rational, she shot her arm through the bars and grasped the chain. The cage was heavy, but her adrenaline rush would last for a moment more. There was a sickening pop, and suddenly someone wrapped around her waist and pulled her back, and the giant manservant took the chain, putting the belt to the cage. The next events happened quickly.

The cage was swinging in moments, and both Artemis and the centaur called to Butler at the same moment. The shuttle port was approaching quickly, but with fear, Alexis saw that two thick doors were sliding shut. Each was at least six feet wide.

"The blast doors!" the female elf called. Alexis barely heard her over the roar of the magma. But she could barely hear anything over the rush of her blood in her ears. Her shoulder hurt, and she wondered if it was there at all. The cage had been very heavy.

Butler shut off the Moon Belt a moment before it crashed onto the docking area floor. As Foaly had predicted, the hinges came apart, and the group stood dazed before starting a mad dash to the blast doors. He saw Alexis, her face deathly pale. Even if she wasn't wearing a spaghetti strapped tank top, Butler could have realized that her shoulder was severely dislocated. Already the joint was bruising. Hopefully they could heal her. But at the moment she looked faint. He remembered the first and only time his shoulder had been dislocated. It had hurt. As he scooped the girl up, he forced his mind to ignore the fact that he had also continued to fight the three hired assassins that had hurt him and escort his elder Principal to his evening mass. He'd been nineteen at the time. But this girl was younger and hadn't been taught to deal with excruciating pain. Butler was almost at the doors now. Holly and Trouble were the first through, followed closely by Foaly. Mulch and Artemis were slightly behind. In passing, Butler grabbed both by their collars and threw them through the closing gap. Then he passed through the doors himself, with inches to spare.

With a loud rumble, the fireproof barriers closed. As mud Men and fairies alike tried to regain breath, the roar of the flare passed. It took a few minutes to pass, and everyone seemed to realize that magic or not, it would have been a fatal encounter.

"Now what do we do?" Mulch's voice rose above the panting.

"First, we get you humans out of here," Holly said. "As soon as we know that no flares are coming, we'll load you into the shuttle and send you home."

Butler and Artemis immediately protested. "If not for us, the last rebellion would have succeeded. We're going to ensure that a second rebellion doesn't ruin all our hard work," Butler argued hotly.

"Don't think about trying to stop the rebellion," a voice said. Holly groaned. Appearing on the wall, was Amber once again.

"If you are viewing this, then at least one of you survived the flare. Too bad. That means that this lovely shuttle port is going to self destruct. To be fair, you have a minute to try to escape. And I'll be fair again, if you want to find me, I'm at the Sisterhood Headquarters." A map appeared on the screen. "Here's you, and here's me. And here's how to get to me." The map disappeared, revealing Amber's grinning face. "But not many people live after explosions. You knew that Holly. Ta!"

Large, red human numbers appeared on the screen, replacing Amber's face. Before it started, Amber's face appeared again. "Doesn't this seem familiar? A shuttle port and a bomb. Where did I hear that before?" She started laughing, and was once again replaced by the numbers. As they started going down, Amber's laughing continued to fill the shuttle port.

"Now what do we do?" Mulch asked, the slightest hint of sarcasm in his voice. No one paid him any attention. Foaly galloped over to the central computer, and checked the flare schedule.

"No flares are due until tomorrow in this chute!" He called.

"Okay, humans and Foaly into the shuttle. Trouble, check the doors with me," Holly said, all her LEP training coming back in a single instant. As she had figured, the doors were sealed. 45 seconds. Artemis had to escape in the shuttle, and there were no other forms of transportation. A single idea came into her head.

"There is one option that we can use to get to Amber," Trouble said, as if reading her mind. "But none of the Mud Men or Foaly could do it."

"I was thinking the same thing. We'll have to bring Mulch along as well." Both of the elves looked over to the dwarf. He shrank under their gaze, suddenly suspicious. "We might need him and that Moon Belt."

The trio raced over to the shuttle, and explained their plan. Although it was risky, it was agreed that it was the only option. Not the best, but the only one.

With ten seconds left, the shuttle took off, leaving Holly, Trouble, and a very frightened Mulch behind. They headed past the blast doors, and climbed onto the chute walls. Seconds later, burning debris flew from where the fairies had stood not moments before. The shuttle had been hovering above the entrance, and a communications spike came down.

"Holly, are you sure this is necessary? We can drop you off--"

"No Foaly. Get them home," Holly said, trying to face the mike but couldn't risk turning around.

"Fine, be stubborn. But anyway, good luck." The mike was retracted, and the shuttle started to fly away.

"Um, Holly? I kind of agree with Foaly here. Why can't they drop us off?" Mulch pleaded. Holly's patience was wearing thin, but fortunately for Mulch, Trouble answered.

"Amber showed us where she is. She doesn't expect us to survive and come after her. And if we did survive, she's assumed that we'll come after her in a shuttle. But if we did use the shuttle, she'd just blast us out of the sky. She'd never expect us to climb chute walls."

"There is a reason she wouldn't expect it. It's crazy!" Mulch exclaimed. "This is worse than when I climbed the Spiro Tower with Juliet hanging on me," Mulch said to himself. Holly overheard him and smiled. It would take him a moment to figure out the rest of the plan. His nimble fingers stopped climbing, and he looked at the Moon Belt he wore. "Hey--"

"It's only if we get to a point without footholds," Holly quickly explained. Mulch grumbled under his breath for a few minutes, but continued climbing. The chute was silent as the companions traveled as an excruciating pace. There were only a few points where Trouble and Holly had to hang onto Mulch's Moon Belt, and the first time was quite scary.

"You guys are just lucky that I haven't had a drink in a while and that these surfaces are very dry," Mulch chuckled as he unhooked the two elves.

"Of course the walls are dry. Tons of magma super heat them every day," Trouble said, rolling his eyes at Holly. She had to stifle a laugh. Other than Foaly, Trouble was her best friend, and she'd seen very little of him in the past four months. Still, something was different.

After what felt like hours, they stumbled into the Sisterhood Headquarters' shuttle port. Carefully avoiding the few technicians, they crawled through a side door that led to the actual HQ.

"Hey Holly, you do know that guys aren't allowed, right?" Mulch asked as they reached a grand oak door that would lead them into the heart of the Sisterhood.

"Yes, Mulch, I do know. Why are you asking?" Holly was very annoyed. She stared at Mulch until he answered.

"Well," he started, fidgeting under her gaze, "we're going where tons of the Sisters are. I doubt that they'll just let two guys walk around their sanctuary."

Holly considered this. It was true. Where she could pretend to be a visitor, Mulch and Trouble wouldn't get very far.

"I'll search every corridor and warn you whenever someone starts heading our way. Maybe we'll get lucky," she said to herself, and slowly pushed the door open. There was a large chamber, with marble pillars supporting the high ceiling. There were dozens of doors all around the room. Elaborate tapestries and velvet and silk curtains hung around the room, concealing the doorways. Taking a step in, Holly felt the plushest carpet beneath her feet. It felt softer than her bed, and it was a carpet. She looked at the scattered couches and day beds, imagining how soft they were.

She walked in, looking behind all the curtains before waving Trouble and Mulch in. They looked around the room in awe, then remembered their task. They hid behind the deep red velvet closest to the door. Holly opened the door, and saw a single pixie in a smaller, but equally elaborate chamber. She looked up.

"Are you looking for someone?" The pixie asked. For a moment, holly was reminded of the first Brittany that she met, but she simply nodded.

"Do you know where Amber Brill is?" She hoped that this pixie wasn't also in Opal's employ.

"Oh, her room is six doors to the left," the pixie said politely. "I take it you were on a tour and got lost?"

"Uh, yes. Silly of me. Thank you," Holly closed the door quietly. Nodding to Trouble and Mulch, she counted six doors down.

"Here goes nothing," she muttered, and entered the room.