"She has to leave. I can't allow her to stay. It's far too dangerous to be with me. My job, my life, everything I must do is dangerous. Sometimes I don't know if I'll live to see the next morning. I don't know if I'll wake up and see the sun streaming through my window. It's like I'm standing on the edge of a blade. One false movement and I slice myself in two. I can't put others at risk. If someone were to get hurt, if she were to get hurt I'd die. I'd surely die."

"Why can't he understand that when he tries to protect me I end up getting hurt anyway. There seems to be no point in it anymore. It's as if he's blinded by his hopes to protect me that he cannot see beyond that and into the true source of all of my pains. He's killing me from the inside out. Whether he means to or not, the fact is that he is. I'm dying. I'm truly dying."

555

"Winry..." Edward whispered nervously into her ear as he thought of pulling away from the girl. The feeling of her being so unbelievably close to him made Edward shiver. Her hair brushed ever so gently against his face with every slight movement she made. "I'm okay. You can let go." He told her in a soothing voice as his arms hung limply by his sides. Although what he really wanted to say was, "Please, let me go. Let me go now." It was much more demanding than what he had just told her.

Winry clung tightly to Edward gripping his red coat, breathing in his scent. She had not heard him whisper his plea.

Winry brought her hands up to Edward's head as she placed her head on his shoulder. She ran her slender hands down his neck making him shiver again. She twirled the loose strans of his golden hair between her fingers. It was clear that she didn't want only to comfort Edward any more. The lust from the previous night returned to her eyes.

"Why is it? Why, Ed?" Winry whispered into his ear.

"Winry..." Edward said uncomfortably. His muscles began to tense.

She's holding me again... He thought, remembering events of the pervious night. The night that wasn't what Edward would call 'pleasant'. The night that was indeed a 'living nightmare'.

"I don't understand what you are talking about." Edward told her sternly trying to keep his calm.

"Why do you make me feel this way?" She asked him. Her lips brushing against his neck with every spoken word. Thus, making Edward flinch.

"I...don't know." Edward told her because he really had no idea.

Tell her to let go you idiot! Edward screamed at himself. Tell her now before things get as bad as last night! Or even worse!

"Winry, I don't think you should be-"

"Just...please...hold me. Hold me." She told him snuggling deeper into his chest.

Why do I do this to him? I keep telling myself that it's just because grandma passed away. That I need someone to turn to, but is that really all Ed is to me? And if so why do I need him so much? Winry questioned herself as she fiddled with Edward's hair. Stupid jerk, you mess me up so bad...

Edward did not answer and he began to sweat due to nervousness. The situation was beginning to get severe just as he had feared.

I can't... Edward told himself. It's just that we're friends and...friends shouldn't be doing things like this. I can't hold her. I can't touch her. I can't even make eye contact with her at her current state. She's unstable. There's no way I can even think about her living with me now! I don't know what she might do to me! And what if-Arrgh! Don't think that way! I can't think that way! That's just nasty! There was silence and nothing more than Edward's frustrated thoughts filled the air. They were getting quite jumbled.

"Please, just this once and I'll never ask for anything from you again." Winry did not understand why she was asking Edward to do such things. Sure the two of them had hugged before but not like this. These hugs seemed less innocent than the hugs they gave each other when they were younger. Maybe it was because, in their childhood days, Winry and Edward had not yet experienced true sorrow or fear. The sorrow of losing a loved one or the fear of not opening your eyes to a new day. Both had deeply scared the two teens. Innocence was completely taken from them as a price. It was equivalent exchange after all.

If doing this will prevent Winry from ever approaching me again so be it. It is far too dangerous for her to be with me in the first place. I can't allow her to be hurt. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if she did and it was because of me. I'd die. I'd surely die.

Edward wrapped his arms around Winry's waist, the sleeves of his red coat draped over her sides. He put all of his feelings for her into this one, single embrace. For he knew that if Winry kept her promise of not asking for anything from him ever again, Edward would no longer be seeing his childhood friend. It would be the safest way to keep Winry away from danger, or so Edward thought. To him it was as if he were her biggest danger.

"Ed...!" Winry whispered taken slightly by surprise. She had never thought he would actually listen to her. She hated to admit it but she loved the feeling of his strong arms wrapped around her. His warmth filling her entire body. Filling her heart. But her heart was soon frozen over by the same man that lit a fire within it.

"Winry." Edward's arms dropped to his sides. "You have to go. You can't stay. I'm sorry." His eyes overcast in a dark fog.

I have to be strong. It's for Winry's own good. Edward thought to himself. I tell myself that but why does it hurt so much to do something that is undoubtedly right?

Winry's eyes started to water. She turned sharply and headed for the door and shoved it open with full force.

How can he do that! Hold me like that and then just tell me to leave. I'm not something he can toy with! I wanted him to hug me. To return my feelings. But I guess it was my fault after all for thinking it might be different. Edward always thinks of himself! His own goals come first! It would have been better for him to just tell me to leave without getting my hopes up!

"Winry, wait! I'm sorry, but I can't let you stay! I have a reason. I really do." Edward called after her. He ran to catch up with the girl who he knew he had hurt badly. Not on the outside but on the inside was where Edward had just cut her open with a knife.

"Shut up! I don't give a damn what you say!" Winry shot back him as she ran briskly down the street. She tried not to pay much attention to the people that were watching them. Winry and Edward were, after all, making quite a bit of noise yelling at each other. Their voices were so loud that they could be heard over the rumbling motors of cars that passed by.

She spun around at the end of the crowded block. Her eyes blaring into his. Rage and sadness bottled up in those deep pools of blue.

"I can't believe you!" She screamed. People arched their heads to see what was causing the noise. The people gave the two blonds cold stares and continued on their way.

"Can't believe me? What are you talking about?" Edward stepped toward Winry.

Winry looked at him with disgust. "I'll just get in the way, right? You need to study and I'll bother you. I'm not as important to you as you keep telling me!" She spat.

Those words stung Edward like a needle.

So this is what you've always thought I was thinking...

"You are important to me. You really are." Edward told her as he drew himself closer.

"Wrong answer, Ed. Wrong answer. Sure I'm i important /i but not even close to Al! In your eyes I'm nothing but an obstacle in your way from getting him back! And you know it!" Tears fell down Winry's porcelain skin.

"That's not...true." Edward whispered although he knew that her statement was partly true.

"No one can compare to my brother, but no one can compare to you either. You're my friend and if you were the one that needed help, I'd help you. I wouldn't leave you alone and I can't leave Al alone. What kind of brother and friend would I be if I did?" Well, that was what Edward wanted to say. But he couldn't bring himself to speak those much needed words. The words that might have made a difference toward how Winry was feeling. They might have kept her from running.

Winry turned quickly and bolted down a narrow alleyway. It was as if the light preferred to avoid the place. Her blond hair overshadowing her darkened face, she rubbed her eyes while running to clear her clouded vision.

Why do I feel this way...? Why am I acting so weird? I don't understand! It's just stupid Ed! Why am I crying over him? Not again! Oh God, not again!

Winry turned around to see that Edward was no longer behind her. She stopped in the alley to catch her breath. Her eyes were still dripping with tears but Winry didn't care.

After a few seconds she started off in the opposite direction she had first come. Running harder and faster than before she just wanted to get away. Get away from it all. Reality was far to harsh in her eyes.

With Winry unable to chart a clear path due to the tear crowding her eyes Winry collided with another person.

"Sorry..." She spoke in a voice barely audible. It was nearly impossible to speak while crying that hard. Her voice came out shaky and raspy.

Winry glanced up at the person that was with eye level with her. And she was shocked to see no one other than...No, not Edward but...Ren! He held a few paper bags in his hands piled with groceries, oil, and other random things.

"W-Winry?" He spoke in much more surprise than she had been. "What hap-"

Before Ren could finish Winry grabbed a hold of his arm. Tears were pouring down her face.

"Take me away...Please. I don't care where you take me. Just take me somewhere other than here..." Winry pleaded. "Or else I'll die. I will truly die."

Ren looked at Winry with concern. He wanted to ask what was wrong but he thought against it. Instead he simply nodded and grabbed her hand to reassure her that it would be okay. That was one action Edward would never do because all he thought about was Winry's safety. He couldn't allow her to stay. To get to accustomed to being too close to him. But it was a sad thing that Winry didn't know that. And it was even more heartbreaking that Edward couldn't bring himself to tell her. He would surely regret this in the future. For it holds things that no one can truly predict...

A/N:

I am so sorry! I was wondering why my chapters were weird and I just realized that they were out of order! Again, I am so sorry! You might need to back track a little because of my stupid mistake...