Disclaimer: See Chapter 1
Warnings: Again, mentions of child abuse. If you don't like don't read.
Thank you for all of the great reviews! It was pretty much a unanimous decision. . the master is going to be found alive. He'll be making an entrance soon so keep reading. Here's the next chapter. Enjoy!
Chapter 8: Confusion
Haldir woke up the next morning to a soft knocking on his door. He gently pulled Zinnia off of him and wrapped her small arms around a pillow. She shifted slightly and burrowed deeper as he pulled the blankets to her shoulders. He walked to the front door and opened it to reveal one of Galadriel's handmaidens carrying a large basket. She smiled at him as he opened the door.
Good morning Haldir.
Suvel. He greeted with a large grin.
I have some clothing and supplies for our newest inhabitant. She lifted the basket in her arms.
Please come in. He moved back allowing her entrance.
Tell me that little child is staying at your brothers Haldir.
Nay, she is asleep in . Suvel cut him off.
Haldir! Look around this room and tell me why a child her age should not be let in here. At a loss Haldir scanned the room and saw nothing out of place. Everything was neat and orderly put where it should be.
Suvel I do not understand what. . he was cut off again.
There are weapons within easy reach Haldir! she said exasperated. Not only that but all of those glass bottles, they have to be put up as well. This place is dangerous for a child! Haldir took another look and admitted that she was right. At least three daggers were at her height. As well as his arrow making supplies. Even more was in reach should she climb on a chair. His weapon cleaning and sharpening oils were all in glass bottles out on a table with his sword. The place he normally put it when he came back from the boarders. His bow and quiver were against the wall.
Suvel I was not thinking. He looked back to the elf in front of him. She sighed and set the basket down and looked back to him and smiled.
I know dear one. You are not used to thinking of such things. Suvel had been one to help her mother raise him and his brothers after their father had been killed in the last alliance. She reached up and started pulling the wilted flowers from his hair. He blushed realizing he had forgotten them yet again. Oh Haldir, I am so happy that you have decided to care for this child. I never thought I would see you become a father. Always so busy at the borders. She sighed again. I would see you married to a nice elf and have a family.
Suvel They had this argument for an age now. He would probably never marry. It was just not something that he saw in his future. He pledged his loyalties to his Lord and Lady, always away at the borders. He could not see that being the kind of life any one would want to share with him permanently.
I know, I know Haldir. She stopped the argument before it started. I have brought some clothes for her as well as combs and brushes. Also some play things if she would like them. Lord Celeborn has informed me that another dresser will be brought up as well as another bed. Those should be here later as they are still being made. Haldir nodded and wondered where he was going to put everything. Perhaps you should also request a weapons cabinet. He nodded and smiled at her.
Thank you Suvel. I believe that there are many things I will miss if you are not here to help me. She smiled at him.
Ah, Haldir, you know how much I love children. It is such a shame that we have not had any here in such a long time. She looked around. Now, let us go through the rest of your home and I will tell you what needs to change.
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Zinnia woke up and stretched slightly, then suddenly bolted straight up. She looked around the room and frowned. Looking out the window she saw that it was past sunrise and she blanched quickly jumping out of bed. 'I didn't make breakfast.' She thought and frowned again. She remembered going to sleep, Haldir singing to her softly. He was sure to be angry with her for not having breakfast ready when he got up. She quietly went to the door and pressed her ear against it. She could just make out the sounds of talking and quickly backed away from it.
Her master had always wanted her out of the way and out of sight when he had visitors. Unless she was serving them, she shuddered slightly and backed up to the bed. She was confused and didn't know what to do. She turned back to the bed and started making it hoping that Haldir wouldn't be as mad if she had done some work. As soon as she was done with the bed she started picking up clothes that were lying around on the floor and folding them. A few were noticeably dirty and she set those aside so she could wash them later. The others she sat on a neat pile on the bed.
She looked around the room thoughtfully and decided that she would have to clean the floor and dust. Perhaps he would want her to clean his weapons. She hoped that he wouldn't want her to sharpen them, she wasn't very good at it. Always managing to cut herself somehow. She opened a dresser door and frowned. The clothes were folded sloppily and were getting wrinkled. She quickly pulled them out and refolded them placing them back in their place. After finishing she looked around the room not knowing what to do. She knew she wouldn't be able to leave the room until his guest was gone and stood next to the bed waiting until she would be needed for something.
She still didn't understand the words he had said to her last night, at least not completely. She was free. . but didn't understand why he was taking care of her if she was not his. No one cared unless they had to. She wondered if he was just being nice to her until he trained her properly for her new home. She didn't care, she would take what she could get. 'He said he wasn't my master though.' She thought. She decided not to think about it, whatever position she was in she couldn't change it. She would have to accept it and adapt. She only hoped that she would learn fast enough. Knowing if she didn't she would be sent away.
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There is room enough for this furniture in my bedroom, said Haldir looking around the small study. All it contained was a desk and a shelf with some books and scrolls on it.
Then it is settled. This shall become her room. Suvel smiled at him. Now let us go see the little one. She was unable to hide the eagerness from her voice. Haldir smiled and nodded.
She was still asleep when I left her Suvel. She needs her rest I will not wake her. Suvel looked at him with a motherly look. As if saying, 'if you realize that I already know.' Haldir smiled sheepishly and then motioned for her to go to the bedroom. As Suvel went to the bedroom he went to the basket and looked for some clothes for Zinnia to change into.
Zinnia's head snapped up when she heard the door being opened. She saw a tall female elf enter and frowned, dropping her gaze to the floor. Thoughts ran though her head trying to figure out who the female was. She had not been there the night before and she guessed that she was not a wife. Her master had no wife but women visited him regularly. She frowned when the elf walked over to her and kneeled down.
Hello little one, said Suvel smiling. She was confused as to why the child was acting as she was. Her eyes were on the ground and wouldn't look up. "Hello." She knew a few words and phrases in common, but did not have the mastery that Haldir possessed. The child still gave no response. She reached out to place a hand on her head and saw the girl shrink back from the touch. She pulled her hand back and stood again.
Perhaps you would like to go to breakfast little one? She tried to remember in westron but only one word came to mind. "Breakfast?" At this she did get a reaction. The girls shoulders drooped and her head lowered even more.
'She is here to punish me for not making breakfast' thought Zinnia as she slumped even more. She wanted to tell the elf in front of her that she had meant to but didn't wake up. Alar always woke her up. Tears came to her eyes as she thought of her brother. 'He would have liked it so much more.' She sniffed quietly waiting for her punishment to start. 'He should be here not me. He deserved this. He deserved to live among the elves. He wouldn't have messed up as much as I already have.'
'I'm sorry Alar.' She hoped that her brother heard her wherever he was. 'I should have gotten you away faster, I should have known he was there. I shouldn't have fought him so you could get away. I should have told you to run and not screamed for your help.' Tears started rolling down her cheeks. She jumped back when the elf in front of her touched her lightly on the shoulder.
Child. . why do you cry so? Suvel looked down concerned to the weeping human in front of her. She frowned even more when the girl jumped back from her touch. You are not frightened of us are you? Perhaps you would feel better after a bath? she questioned. "Bath?" The girl started trembling and backed up her eyes on the floor the entire time. She was shaking her head no.
"Please. . I didn't mean to not make breakfast." The effort to hold back her sobs making her voice scratchy. "I'll do it tomorrow. Please. No." She kept backing up until she hit the dresser behind her and she slid down sitting pulling her knees close to her. 'Where is Haldir?' She thought and started rocking. "They said I was safe."
"Zinnia, you are safe," said Haldir hearing her words as he entered the room and immediately dropping to her side. He pulled her to his embrace and held her tightly. She was trembling.
I am sorry Haldir I did not mean to upset her. She was close to tears as well.
It is alright Suvel. I should have warned you. He looked back to Zinnia and pulled her closer. Thank you for the supplies and advice. Both are most appreciated. Suvel nodded.
I will make sure that you have the weapon cabinet by the end of the day. Perhaps your brothers could help you move later. He nodded at her words and scooped Zinnia in his arms as he stood.
Yes, if you see them could you please ask them to bring lunch here. I do not think that I will be able to leave before then. He said glancing to Zinnia.
Of course, I will also have someone send breakfast. Suvel looked to the child in his arms and smiled sadly before leaving.
He looked around the room and noticed that not only was the bed made but also, all of the clothes that were normally thrown about on the floor were either folded neatly on the foot of his bed or in a single pile. He held her a little tighter when he realized that she probably thought that it was her duty to do such. Mentally he cursed himself. 'I should have known she would not have understood. She should not have woken up alone.' He kept petting her hair and whispering reassurances in both elvish and common until her trembles stopped.
"What has upset you little one?" He started rubbing her back as he walked to the main room and sat on a chair. He heard her hiccup and she pressed further into him.
"I didn't mean to not make breakfast. Alar." There was another hitch in her breath. "Alar always wakes me up."
"It is not your duty to make breakfast. Nor is it to fold my clothes and make the bed."
"But. . I have to be useful." She looked up to him. "I have to be useful or I get sent away." Haldir smiled at her softly and wiped tears from her cheeks .
"You will not be sent away. You are under my care now, I would not discard you." He could tell that she was confused again. "Zinnia, you are no longer a slave. You do not have to take care of me. You are a child, as an adult I should be the one taking care of you." She looked at him like he had just told her that the sky was green and shook her head no.
"You have no reason to care for me. You say you are not my master. I . . I don't understand."
"I do not have the words to explain it to you little one." She blinked and another tear fell down her face. He cupped her cheek and wiped it away with his thumb smiling softly at her. She sniffed and returned it hesitantly.
"If I am not to make the bed, or the laundry, nor breakfast what are my chores?" He saw something close to dread enter her eyes and briefly shut his eyes in pain.
"We will share responsibilities," he said finally looking to her. "The cooking, washing, and cleaning. . we will decide how to split those chores later. When you are more settled in."
"You also have your weapons." She added.
"Those are not for you to touch," he said sternly. Her brows furrowed.
"I can clean them though. I was trained."
"Be that as it may, you are no longer responsible for that chore."
"Then. . . I will do the laundry and clean the floors. If that is alright." She looked back to him.
"Ah, then I shall have to make sure everything else is clean." He added a small smile though she frowned slightly.
"I can help you."
"Yes you can." He answered his smile growing some. "Now, Suvel was kind enough to bring you over some clothes and play things. We also have to ready your room."
"My room?" she asked surprised.
"Yes." He said with a smile. His head turned when there was a knock on the door. He stood and took Zinnia with him holding her. He opened it and a male elf was there holding a tray of fruit, bread, and cheese.
Good morning Haldir. Suvel sent me with breakfast for you and your new foster daughter. Haldir felt Zinnia tense and hug him tighter. In response he tightened his grip on her slightly to offer her more comfort and support.
I appreciate it Kian. Haldir took the tray easily balancing it with one hand. Kian nodded back and left. Haldir closed the door with his foot and set the tray on the low table before sitting on the couch it sat in front of.
"Are you hungry Zinnia?" He pulled her off him and set her next to him on the couch. She shook her head yes and he smiled. "Then eat little one." She reached out and grabbed some cheese stuffing it in her mouth and grabbed another also putting it in her mouth. Her cheeks were puffed out and she reached for another. Haldir chuckled but stilled her hand.
"Not so fast, you will upset your stomach." She tried to say something but only mumbles came out around the food in her mouth. "It is not polite to talk with food in your mouth." He said. She looked down to her hands and he sighed. He grabbed a piece of fruit and started eating it trying to decide what would happen next.
An hour later Haldir was trying to get her into one of the dresses that Suvel had brought her. He had successfully gotten her to take another bath after he had shown her how to lock the bathroom door. She had come out in his shirt and now would not change. She was refusing saying that they were too nice and that she would ruin them. He could tell that she was scared that she would get punished if she got it dirty. The argument was growing tedious and he had to resist the urge to just order her to wear it.
"Zinnia, please just wear the dress. I promise you will not be in any trouble should it get dirty." She looked to him then the garment he had in his hand still hesitating. "You can not run around in my shirt for your stay here."
"It's too pretty and it's new." She shook her head no refusing the dress. He looked down to the dress and sighed. It was a normal, plain dress. Nothing fancy and she resisted because it was finery to her. "I'll . . I'll be bad and it will get ruined."
"It is your dress child. If it is ruined I will get you another. And if that one is ruined I will get you yet another."
"I'll dirty it." He looked to her and then to the dress.
"Will you wear the dress if it were already dirty?" She looked to him confused. "You would be responsible should it get dirty then."
"But it's clean." He smiled and held out his hand. She looked to it then him and slowly grabbed it with her own small hand. He walked them out of his talan and down to the forest floor. He crouched down in front of her holding the dress. "What are you doing?" she asked curiously.
"I am going to dirty the dress so you will wear it aier." He said as he was putting the dress to the ground.
"Don't do that!" She stopped his hand before the dress touched the ground. "The dress is worth money."
"It is just a dress."
"But. . it." She sighed as if annoyed. "It's worth a lot." She met his eyes with hers.
"It is worth nothing if it is not worn."
"I've seen dresses like that before. At the market. They were worth more than I am. I can't wear it, it would be wrong." Haldir looked at her slightly shocked.
"No dress is worth more than you are."
"I saw, it was five gold pieces. Master said he bought me for only three. I know that five is bigger than three. See this is three," she held up three fingers with one hand, "and this is five," she held up five fingers with the other. "There are more fingers on this hand." She said waving the one holding five.
"You are not . . child you are worth more than any amount of money," he said trying to explain it to her.
"Nope, only three. But master said if I looked anything like my mom I would be worth a lot more when I got older." Haldir closed his eyes sickened at the way this poor girl had been treated. "You should sell it."
"It was made specifically for you Zinnia. It is yours." She looked at him confused.
"Then sell it and I can pay for my breakfast."
"You do not have to pay for your breakfast child." He rubbed a hand down his face having no idea how to make her understand.
"I can't pay for it any other way though."
"You do not have to pay for your food Zinnia." He looked to her plainly trying to figure out a way to get her to cooperate.
"I have to earn my keep. You said that I didn't have as many chores as I should so I have to make up for it."
"No, child you do not." She only looked to him not budging at all. "Please, wear the dress. You will not be punished for that."
"But. . if I ruin it. . I can't pay back that much money."
"You will not have to. It is yours. It was given as a gift from Lady Galadriel. Would you refuse her hospitality?" he asked with a small smile. She seemed to hesitate slightly.
"I. . don't want to upset her."
"Then wear the dress little one." He held it out to her. Again she hesitated and seemed to be debating something in her mind. He smiled as she reached out and took the dress from him.
As they climbed the steps to the telain Zinnia tried to think a way out of wearing the dress. Something that would keep her from getting into trouble, something to keep her from getting punished. She still didn't understand why they would allow her to wear a dress of such richness. She looked up to Haldir but he only smiled down at her. She wanted to return it but her gaze went to the dress in her hand. He led her to the bathroom and let her go in.
"I'll be right out here if you need anything," he said with another smile as he shut the door. After a moment she went to it and locked it like he had shown her earlier. She held the dress up and sighed as she lowered her arms down. There was no way out of wearing the dress. If the bright lady wanted her to wear it she had to. Slowly she took off the clothing she was wearing and dropped it to the ground before putting the dress on.
Zinnia looked down at her self and frowned. The dress was too expensive for her. She shouldn't be allowed to wear something so nice. Though she had to admit that the material felt good on her skin. It was smooth and soft, so unlike what she normally wore. Sighing she folded the shirt that Haldir had given her. She knew already that she was going to ruin the dress beyond repair. And she knew that she was going to get punished.
She remembered dropping something of her master's once. A single tankard of ale, and that had only cost a silver piece. He hurt her really bad that night. So bad she couldn't really remember the next couple of days. The elves had treated her nice though. . so far. There was a soft knock at the door and she jumped slightly.
"Zinnia do you need any help?" asked Haldir. She looked to the door and frowned. She still didn't understand him. He was going to dirty the dress simply so she could wear it. She shook her head at the absurdity of it. She knew what she was worth, and it was a lot less than the dress she was wearing.
"No. ." her mind spun to try and figure out what to call him. He had said that he wasn't her master. . but that had to be a lie. The only one that had ever fed her was her master, the only one that had ever given her clothing was her master, the only one that had ever let her sleep under a roof was her master. Tears formed again as she closed her eyes. She wasn't free. . she would never be free. She was a slave, and would always be that. Haldir had been nice to her, she decided she should be happy for that at least. Her head lowered in defeat. "No master."
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Aier = little/small/short one
A/N: I had a lovely person point out that I had Haldir saying 'okay' in the last chapter. That is a big DUH on my part. I try to stay away from elves speaking in a more modern type of English. If you find anything else that really bothers you please let me know. If I agree with it I will probably change it.