Chapter 6 – Council Tension
The next morning, Homestar went to the Jedi Temple, but he did not go to the briefing of the war. Instead, he went to visit Master Pom Pom, the master of the Jedi.
Pom Pom was a big, circular, yellow Pom who was circular, had an orange stripe on his body, orange flippers, and an orange head.
"Premonitions…" bubbled Pom Pom, which was how he communicated with people, "Premonitions… Hmm… These visions you have…"
"Well, in these things, they have pain, suffewing, and death," replied Homestar.
"Yourself you speak of, or someone you know?" bubbled Pom Pom.
"Well, it's my wife, Mawzipan," said Homestar.
"What did you just say?" bubbled Pom Pom.
"I said she's not my wife, Mawzipan," replied Homestar.
Pom Pom was not convinced.
TAKE 2!
"Well, it's someone I know," replied Homestar.
"Someone close to you?" bubbled Pom Pom.
"Yeah."
"Careful you must be when sensing the future, Homestar," bubbled Pom Pom, "The fear of loss is a path to the dark side."
"Well, I don't want these visions to come twue," replied Homestar.
"Death is a natural part of life. Rejoice for those around you who transform into the Force. Mourn them, do not. Miss them, do not. Attachment leads to jealousy. The shadow of greed, that is," bubbled Pom Pom.
"Well, that's hawd."
"Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose."
"Okay, now that's impossible."
After that, Homestar ran to the Jedi briefing room, where several other Jedi were exiting. Obviously, the briefing was over, but Strong Bad was still there by some holograms being shut down.
"Hey! What is up, my dog? My D-U-G-E!" shouted Homestar as he ran into the room.
"Your duge? Look, for the last time, I'm not your duge, I'm not your doge, I'm certainly not your dog, and I'm not freakin' Rondolman! I'm MASTER STRONG BAD!" shouted Strong Bad.
"Okay, Stwong Bad," replied Homestar.
"Master Strong Bad," corrected Strong Bad.
Normally, Homestar wouldn't have argued, but with the recent developments of his mind, he retorted with, "Would you wathew make me call you my dog?"
"I can't believe Homestar outsmarted me," muttered Strong Bad, "By the way, I just want to ask you this. Where the crap were you? You missed out on the briefings on the Outer Rim sieges," said Strong Bad.
"Who cawes about the Outew Wim?" asked Homestar.
"Well, if you care to know, they're doing very well. 110 percent well. Some weird name has fallen, and Master Larry moved up his troops to somewhere that has a weird name," explained Strong Bad, "But the Chancellor is probably going to get more executive power from the Senate today."
"Well, that means mowe action, wight? Is that a good thing?" asked Homestar.
"Homestar, be careful of your friend, Homeschool," warned Strong Bad.
"Why? Is he too newdy?" asked Homestar.
"Perhaps, but he wanted your presence," replied Strong Bad.
"Oh! Wight! I fowgot to give him his pwesent fow Decembeween!" exclaimed Homestar.
"No! I said presence! Anyway, he didn't tell the Jedi Council why," replied Strong Bad, "And yes, that's unusual, so don't try killing yourself thinking."
"Okay. So, is it like this? The Council does not twust the Chancellow? Why?" asked Homestar.
"I don't know, but I think it's because the Force tells us to," replied Strong Bad, "Now, I have to continue looking for my Lappy."
"And I'll find some wibbon fow his pwesents," said Homestar.
Later that day, Homestar went to the Chancellor's Office to meet Homeschool. They were just finishing a discussion that Homestar didn't know what anything meant. Finally, Homeschool gave Homestar a request.
"I need your help, son," said Homeschool.
"No way! You'we not going to be my fathew!" exclaimed Homestar.
"That's not what I meant and wanted!" replied Homeschool, "Instead, I want you to be the eyes, ears, and voice of the Republic."
"Uh, I don't like suwgewy," replied Homestar.
"That's okay. I was only speaking in figurative language. Anyway, to be literate, I want you to be my personal representative on the Jedi Council," said Homeschool.
"Me? A Mastew? Cool!" exclaimed Homestar.
Later that day, Homestar found himself standing in front of the Jedi Council, waiting to be a Jedi Council member. In the chairs of the council were Jedi Homestar knew, like Pom Pom, Strong Mad, Strong Bad, and the holograms of Wheelchair (a white, poorly drawn wheelchair with a mouth) and Pan Pan (a panda version of Pom Pom).
"YOU'RE ON THE COUNCIL!" shouted Strong Mad.
"Yay!" replied Homestar.
"BUT YOU'RE NOT A MASTER!" shouted Strong Mad.
"Boo!" replied Homestar.
"GO TO SEAT!" ordered Strong Mad.
So Homestar went to his chair, and suddenly, sounds were heard. Then everybody looked at Homestar, who was holding Pom Pilot, listening to music.
"I said come on Foogoogads, I said come on Foogoowoogoos, evewybody to the limit, evewybody…" horribly sang Homestar before he noticed people were looking at him.
"It's Fhqwhgads," corrected Strong Bad.
"And that's mine," said Pom Pom.
"Oh, then, can I have my own?" asked Homestar.
"NO!" shouted Strong Mad.
"Oh fu-" began Homestar when there was a loud church organ noise made to block what Homestar said.
Still, the Jedi in the room were shocked with Homestar's unheard profanity.
"Yeah, Chancellow Homeschool taught me that wowd," said Homestar.
So, Wheelchair's hologram began speaking.
"We have surveyed all systems in the Republic, and there's no sign of General Visor or Eh! Steve," reported Wheelchair.
"Oh don't worry.Eh! Steve'saround Coruscant," replied Strong Bad.
"LET'S FLY!" shouted Strong Mad.
"Yeah, we shouldn't allow the droid armies to regroup," agreed Strong Bad.
"Master Strong Bad, our spies contact, you must, and then wait," bubbled Pom Pom.
"What about the droid attack on the Cheat Commandos?" asked the Wheelchair.
"LET'S ROCK, ROCK ON!" shouted Strong Mad.
"Yeah, we get the point," replied Strong Bad, "But really, we can't lose the system. It leads to the southwestern quadrant, and that's important for some reason."
"I know that system well," said Homestar, "The dwoids will be defeated easily!"
"STAY WITH HOMESCHOOL!" shouted Strong Mad.
"Go I will. Good relations with Cheat Commandos, I may have," bubbled Pom Pom.
"POM POM IS GOING TO WAR!" shouted Strong Mad.
"Oh man! I wanted to go!" exclaimed Homestar.
Later that afternoon, Homestar and Strong Bad were walking down a massive Jedi Temple hallway.
"What cwap is this? I don't even get a Pom Pilot! That's stupid!" exclaimed Homestar.
"Oh shut up. At least you're on the council, and to be on the council your age and stupidity, it never happened before, especially since you swore in front of the whole Jedi Council," replied Strong Bad.
"Weally? I thought that wowd was fow releasing my emotions. That's what Chancellow Homeschool told me," replied Homestar.
"Look, you're too close to the Chancellor. The Council doesn't like it when he interferes with the Jedi, for he's creepy," explained Strong Bad.
"But I didn't fowce him to make me be on the Council," replied Homestar.
"But you wanted to be on the freakin' Council, and your friendship with the Chancellor paid off, which is just crap," replied Strong Bad.
"I think so too," agreed Homestar.
"Well, anyway, you're in a delicate situation," said Strong Bad.
"Um, you mean the fwesh food in the supewmawket?" asked Homestar.
"Um, well, there's tension between the Council and Chancellor," continued Strong Bad, who ignored Homestar's remark about the food deli, "You never listen, so you walked right into it!"
"Well, that's because of… what the cwap awe we talking about?" asked Homestar.
"You haven't memorized the script, haven't you?" asked Strong Bad, so Homestar shook his head, "Hey, I've noticed that you talk about jealousy and pride, which are not good things for a Jedi."
"Look, can you get to the pawt of my assignment?" asked Homestar.
"All right," said Strong Bad as they walked in front of a floor-to-ceiling mirror, "Okay, the Council wants you to report on all the Chancellor's dealings. They want to know what he's up to."
"Ooh, I get to spy! It's double-o… h!" exclaimed Homestar.
"We are at war, so be serious!" replied Strong Bad.
"So why didn't the Council tell me this befowe?" asked Homestar.
"Because the assignment's not supposed to be on record or something. Listen, do you think I know everything about the Council? I just joined recently!" retorted Strong Bad, "Anyway, just spy on him, for something's weird with him."
"I don't know. I think what's weiwd is that, you want me to do something I want to do. Usually, you make me do stuff I don't want to do," replied Homestar.
"Well, that's the Council's decision," replied Strong Bad.
Later that day, a large Jedi gunship was flying towards a Clone landing platform. Strong Bad, Strong Mad, Pom Pom, and clone troopers were riding in the gunship. The clone troopers were actually Stinkoman with white armor with white helmets, and guns.
"Homestar did not really like his assignment for some reason," reported Strong Bad.
"Too much under the sway of the Chancellor, he is. Much anger there is in him. Too much pride in his powers," bubbled Pom Pom.
"THEY'RE TOO DANGEROUS! I DON'T TRUST!" shouted Strong Mad.
"He'll be all right. I mean, you don't think Homestar is going to kill the Chancellor, right?" asked Strong Bad.
"POSSIBLY!" replied Strong Mad.
"Wait, so you're saying he's not the Chosen One? I mean, that's why he's a Jedi, so he can destroy the Sith and such," said Strong Bad.
"I DON'T KNOW!" shouted Strong Mad.
"A prophecy . . . that misread could have been," bubbled Pom Pom.
"Don't worry. Homestar won't kill the Chancellor like how he killed Zee-Gee-Oh," reassured Strong Bad.
"Hope right you are. And now destroy the Droid armies on Kashyyyk, I will. May the Force be with you," bubbled Pom Pom.
Then as the gunship landed on the ground, Pom Pom exited as Strong Bad and Strong Mad stayed behind.