Chapter 7 – The Plot May Thicken
That evening, Homestar and Marzipan met in her apartment's veranda. Homestar was telling Marzipan what happened today.
"…and then we all went out for ice cweam, but then I got lost on the way to the pawlow, so I didn't get to eat," finished Homestar.
"You were going to have ice cream with the younglings?" asked Marzipan.
"I did? Oh, I thought they wewe midgets. Anyway, I think that the Jedi awe getting a bit cwazy," said Homestar.
"I don't think so, but do you think we're on the wrong side?" asked Marzipan.
"Oh no! We're in the dawk side!" exclaimed Homestar.
"No, I mean, what if the democracy we've been working for no longer exists? Now that you're closer to the Chancellor than anyone, talk to him to stop the fighting and resume democracy," said Marzipan.
"No thanks. I hate politics," replied Homestar.
"You know, I wish things right now are like when we were at the lake country one episode ago, when there were no politics, no plotting, no war, just our love," said Marzipan.
"Mawzipan, you've got to get wid of the past," said Homestar.
"That was wise, for once," remarked Marzipan, "But I want the past back."
Later that night, Homestar ran over a few people when his speeder landed. Then Homestar ran to the Galaxies Opera House, where he entered the Chancellor's box, where Homeschool was sitting with Leomard Sportsinterviews and another politician. They were watching Fatty's Big Chance's singing in ska.
"Pick it up, pick it up, hup, hup," sang Fatty's Big Chance, "Pick it up, pick it up, hup, hup."
"You wanted to see me, Chancellow?" asked Homestar.
"Yes Homestar, come closer," requested Homeschool as Homestar knelt by Homeschool's seat, "I have good news. Our Clone Intelligence Units have discovered the location of General Visor. He is hiding in the Utapau system."
"Okay, that's good," replied Homestar.
"But I don't think the Council will select you to do the assignment, but you are the best choice, but they can't be trusted," explained Homeschool.
"Well, that's because they're bad at selecting who does assignments," replied Homestar.
"Take a sit," requested Homeschool before saying to his aides, "Leave us, or die."
So as the aides left, Homestar sat in a seat next to the Chancellor.
"Homestar, you know that I can't rely on the Jedi Council. If they hadn't induced you in their plot, they will," explained Homeschool.
"What the heck awe you talking about?" asked Homestar with confusion.
"You must know what I'm saying. The Jedi want to control the Republic, so they're planning to betray me," said Homeschool.
"Oh come on, that's bulls…" began Homestar, about to say another word Homeschool taught him.
"No, think about it. You know, don't you?"
"Well, they don't twust you."
"Or the Senate, Republic, or democracy for that matter," replied Homeschool.
"Maybe," replied Homestar.
"Remember your early teachings, Homestar, 'All those who gain power are afraid to lose it,' even the Jedi," explained Homeschool.
"But the Jedi use theiw powew fow good," replied Homestar.
"Good is a point of view. And the Jedi point of view stinks. The Dark Lords of the Sith believe in security and justice also, yet they're considered by the Jedi to be…" said Homeschool.
"Pamcakes," said Homestar.
"What?"
"Nevew mind."
"Anyway, so the Jedi think that the Sith are evil. But they're similar in almost every way, including their quest for greater power and excluding their lightsaber colors. Also, the Sith is not afraid to lose the dark side of the Force. That's what makes them so powerful," explained Homeschool.
"But they wely on stwength, only fow themselves," said Homestar.
"Very wise remark, but what about the Jedi?" asked Homeschool.
"I don't know. The opposite?" asked Homestar.
"Well, that's what you've been trained to believe. So why do you think something is wrong?" asked Homeschool.
"Um, I don't know," replied Homestar.
"The Jedi Council asked you to do something to betray the Jedi Code, like spying on me?" asked Homeschool.
"Wow! You have psychic powews!" exclaimed Homestar.
"No, it was just obvious. Anyway, did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Pietimer 'the wise?'" asked Homeschool.
"No."
"I thought not. It's a story the Jedi wouldn't have told you."
"I like stowies," said Homestar.
"That's great. Anyway, it's a Sith legend, which doesn't make sense with the Jedi not telling you. Anyway, Darth Pietimer was a Dark Lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise, he could use the Force to influence the midi-chlorians to create life… He had so much knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying," explained Homeschool.
"Wait, you mean, he could make people immowtal?" asked Homestar.
"Precisely, if he would do it that way. ButI don't think that's the exact meaning. What I mean is that he can save people destined to die, whether from a disease or just keeping the person alive when the person is about to die,"replied Homeschool before saying, "The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities, some considered to be unnatural."
"So what happened to the pie man? He got hit in the face with a pie?" asked Homestar.
"No. What happened was that he became so powerful; the only thing he was afraid of was losing his power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew, then his apprentice killed him in his sleep," explained Homeschool, "Pietimer never saw it coming. It's ironic he could save others from death, but not himself."
"Wow," remarked Homestar, "Can people leawn this powew?"
"Not from a Jedi," replied Homeschool.
"Oh man! Oh, and by the way, I killed a few people with my speedew coming hewe. Could you cleaw me ow something like that?" asked Homestar.
"Sure," replied Homeschool, "I'd be happy to do anything for you, like clearing your criminal record."
Kashyyyk was a planet consisting of vast wildlife with lakes, mountains, plants, and all that other stuff. In the hologram area, Pom Pom was in front of a hologram of the rest of the Jedi Council, sitting in their seats. Homestar was half-awake from boredom.
"Homeschooooooool thinks General Visor is on Utapaoooooooooooooooo. We have had nooooo reports of this from our agents," explained Wheelchair.
"HE GOT IT FIRST! WE DIDN'T!" screamed Strong Mad, "THAT'S NOT COOL!"
"Well, I think that something happened in that planet so we wouldn't know, like that one time in Episode II when we didn't know anything about this Kamino," said Homestar.
"Act on this, we must. The capture of General Visor will end this war. Quickly and decisively we should proceed," bubbled Pom Pom, noticing that Homestar made a rare wise comment.
"Does everyone agree? How about you, Homestar?" asked Strong Bad.
All the Jedi in the room agreed, even Homestar.
"But the Chancellow said I should do this mission," said Homestar.
"NO WAY!" shouted Strong Mad.
"Yes, the decision is ours to make," added Wheelchair.
"Oh man!" exclaimed Homestar, "Not again!"
"A Master is needed, with more experience," bubbled Pom Pom.
"SEND STRONG BAD!" shouted Strong Mad.
"Yeah, but wemembew last time in space? Stwong Bad just let him go!" said Homestar.
"No I didn't! Stop discrediting me!" shouted Strong Bad. "And we were in space!"
"What? You did let him go, wight?" asked Homestar.
"Well, I'm better, so face it at that," replied Strong Bad.
"Strong Bad, my choice is," bubbled Pom Pom.
"Yeah. Strong Bad is the best choice," agreed Wheelchair.
"I agree," bubbled Pom Pom.
"THE END!" shouted Strong Mad.
"But I want to go on a mission too!" whined Homestar.
"GO TO WAR!" Strong Mad shouted to Strong Bad.
So, the hologram was turned off. Then Pom Pom went to a clone commander, Commander Greeman.
"The DROIDS have started their main POWER generators," reported Commander Greeman.
"Then now the time is, Commander," bubbled Pom Pom.
"YES sir!" shouted Commander Greeman.
The Cheat Commandos got ready for their battle.
"Come on Cheat Commandos!" shouted Gunhaver, a Cheat in a cowboy hat, shades, and a brown coat, "Let's rock, rock on!"
Then the other Cheat Commandos cheered behind him. Then they ran to face the droid army above the lake in front of them. Both sides had large weaponry and vehicles, like tanks or ships. The Cheat Commandos used their blasters and rocket launchers and other weapons on the droids. Firebert, a Cheat with clothes of a burglar, pressed down on a TNT detonator, blowing up a separatist tank. The clones were helping the Cheat Commandos in battle. Pom Pom was watching all of this instead of fighting for some reason from the hologram area.