IV. Complicated Reality
(Based on Weird Al Yankovic 's "A Complicated Song")
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Uh-huh... Shikon jewel
Uh-huh... uh-huh... save a shard for me.
Demons
are gathering in the woods
We went
just to check it out
Hundreds
are roaming a-round, what a shame – not one piece!
Just us
standin' all alone
You said
"Why not kill them all"
And let
out our pent-up frustration... so then we went
suckin' them in
and slashin' them all
then boomerang bangs
and glowin' arrows fly
and then we saw
that annoying baboon pelt... Tell me,
why'd you have to go and make our lives a living hell?
'Cause right now we'd do
anything to simply get you out of this universe...
into a wormhole...
We chase and we slash and we bang and we shoot and we got so close, oh bummer,
really should have sold that stupid golem to the natives?
no, no, no...
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I was
feelin' pretty down
till my
skimmers came around
They are
my only hope to end this all – I have to say!
In fact
I just thought I might
check out
that eerie cave at night
I was
tryin' to enter, but my gosh, woe is me-ee!
Who woulda guessed
this miasma swirl
would suddenly rise
and draw out my soul
and son-of-a-gun
the love of my life is hee-re... tell me,
how was I supposed to know why he was using this cave?
believe me, if I knew that bastard's evil plan I would've never came here!
What to do now...
Should I go ahead and pretend
and get hitched and find out what he really's up to
then get the hell away from there where I can finish my plan?
no, noo, noo...
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I had
so much on my mind
I thought
maybe I'd unwind
try out
those new il-lusion
generating vines
Everything seemed
to go well as planned
But that miko girl
made all my plots foil
and shot out at me
and knocked off my head you see-ee-ee... tell me!
Why'd I have to go and get myself de-cap-i-tated?
This really is a
major inconvienience, oh man I really hate it...
such a drag now,
can't move on my own, I can't sleep
can't eat sashimi any-more
can't jump or do back-flips or even read "Youkai Illustrated"...
Oh no!
Why'd you have to go and make me all mut-il-ated?
I gotta tell ya
life without a body kinda makes me irritated!
what a bum-mer...
can't kill, I can't pose and be hot
but my neck is enjoyin' a pleasant breeze, now
haven't been the same since my head and I were separated...
no, nooooo, nooo...
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(Author's note: May the outrageousness continue for eternity.)