Title: Ideals

Genre: Drama/Angst

Dedicated to: LushBaby

Rating: PG-13.

Disclaimer: I still don't own the HP universe, and I'm still not making any money from this story. The plot and interpretations of the characters are mine, but that's not so much as it sounds.

Authoress's note: Haven't got anything to say except that I am enjoying this story even though I haven't been working on it frequently enough to keep me happy. I mean, I'd be upset if I were reading this story and there were these huge gaps between postings. So I apologise to any and all readers who got annoyed with me.

It is two o'clock; early enough in the afternoon that leaving my office will be in character.

I announce to my secretary that I am not going to be available until next week and make a show of ignoring the fact that she is ogling me, which encourages her to look me over even more thoroughly; vanity is supposed to be one of my most endearing qualities, according to Witchy Weekly.

As I exit the building I ignore the respectful greetings which are offered by people with decades more seniority than myself. At twenty-one I have a very enviable position in a rather obscure branch of the Office of the Regulation of Educational Accessory Expenditure, which is rather obscure itself. I'm not really sure what the department does, but my position gives me an excuse to occasionally meet with the Headmaster of Hogwarts. I use these meetings as an excuse to drop in on my former Potions instructor; a lot of information is exchanged in those short visits.

How does Severus do it?

It is a difficult thing; balancing two opposing sets of interests. I know, from my own experience. Being present for too many meetings of The Brotherhood makes The Dark Lord uneasy because he counts on me being above suspicion to the Ministry. But, if I miss too many gatherings then The Order doesn't get the information that they need and Albus may begin to wonder if I am hiding things from him.

The only point of contact that I have to count on, for either side, is Severus. And he serves both sides credibly enough that no one questions his loyalty.

I'm still new enough as a covert operative that no one trusts me, yet. But after three decades Severus is beyond suspicion. Which is why he was the first person I thought of when I noticed the, irregularities.

I enter the intimately lit café and do not need to give my name to the maître d'. With a nod I acknowledge a few influential members of the Ministry, and even stop to exchange greetings, strategically, as I am led to my seat. Being young, very wealthy, and attractive makes me a much sought after acquaintance and everyone I can greet by name feels that honour.

Chablis and lightly seasoned scallops provide something for my hands to do while I review things, but I don't even taste the food.

I'm a fairly low level agent for both sides. I'm new and the assignments that I receive aren't really all that important. I am told to gather information about a certain suspected Death Eater for the Order and then told by The Brotherhood to gather information on a suspected member of the Order. But lately I have been given somewhat higher priority assignments.

I lured someone who had cover as a member of the Ministry into a dinner meeting so that he could be abducted as he left. He was supposedly a member of the Order. The team from The Brotherhood were ambushed by Aurors. The man all of the fuss had been about, I happen to know, was working for Severus. Though, I'm not sure which side. I've turned in reports that were ignored, made contact with people who were then victims of violent crime…according to the Daily Prophet. And at least once a team of Aurors was caught off guard because they apparently didn't get the warning that I had sent, hours in advance.

I've finished my meal and still I have only established that there are foul-ups in the handling of information that I am reporting. Dropping my linen napkin on the remainder of a rather good breaded veal I leave the maitre d' to charge my account.

I disappareate while stepping out into the afternoon sun, but someone snaps a picture of me anyway. Soon some magazine will be featuring a picture of me exiting the café, alone- what an exclusive!

Slowly meandering up my front walk I come to a decision. Everything I do and say, every thing I wear and eat, is all a part of my cover. It is this other person I have created, this other version of me that can't even consider what it is I am thinking. The real me is only safe in one place and I have to go there before I can really think for myself.

Severus is a known spy and both The Order and The Brotherhood rely on him to head all of their covert operations. Both sides believe him to be utterly loyal to them and both sides believe him to be only a minor operative for the opposing side. He handles everything I bring back no matter who has given me my orders, and it is Severus who tells me which side gave me those orders to begin with. Then he goes back and personally meets with Voldemort or Dumbledore to tell them what I have told him…

Severus is really the only one implicated in this. He is betraying someone. But, who? And, more importantly…what am I to do…?