Yume: erm, guys?i think we should just get on with it, i mean seriously...
Gale: (nods) then, we can kill Berta!!!!! mwuahahahahahahah- chokecoughgasp- hahahahahahahahahahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Yako: O.O uh-huh...
Aya: .... er, Merry New Yeah and a Happy Christmas?
Yako: Happy Christmas and a Merry Birthday?
Yume: no, Merry fourth of July minna!!!
Gale: (sighs and shakes head) they're confused... Ry? would you do the honors?
Ryou: sure! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year minna!!!
Bakura: just get on with it... and oh yeah, they don't own us...
DsGirls: hey that's our line!!!
Title: Destiny As We Make It
Summary: Shounen-ai/yaoi so for those who don't like this, please don't read and don't waste your time. Ryou Bakura is in love with his Yami but his other half just won't show his true emotions. Hurt and confused, Ryou becomes a sight for another's eyes… and when the unexpected happens, Bakura has to decide what to do: leave his beloved hikari and let him live… or stay with Ryou and risk loosing his tenshi. What is he (Bakura) going to do now that he knows that someone can and might really help his beloved? Will he be willing to give up his happiness for Ryou's safety? And will he be able to accept these "weak" feelings he feel for this certain mortal in the first place? And what about Ryou? Will he ever be able to forgive Bakura?
Chapter9: If I could Change I would
Seto's POV
"What?" his voice was strident from all his shouting and crying.
"Step out of his life forever," I said as I fixed my eyes on Bakura, straight in his eyes, daring him to say no and face the appalling consequences.
Silence
"Is that really indispensable?" he asks inaudibly, turning his head as he did so. "Because I can't. I love him too much…" he shook his head miserably.
"Yes or no?"
"…"
"Only two choices Bakura. Get out of Ryou's life or nothing at all. Yes or no?"
"If that's what it takes to make him happy… then," he paused.
"Then?"
"Then yes… but promise me," he looked up at me with those forlorn eyes.
"Promise you what?"
"Promise me that he'll live… happily." There was an inexplicable tension in his normally cold voice. I snort at his pitiable request.
"I'll never hurt him the way you did."
"Just make sure of that… or else, the shadows will come for your soul… I will come for your soul…" he glared at me with shining brownish scarlet eyes. I shuddered inwardly at his intense gaze; I have to admit, he's one scary spirit.
Bakura dropped is line of vision to the floor while I intently study the object of the eyes of my love. Even when he wasn't staring at you, he was still as menacing as anyone could ever be, and as forbidding as anyone can never imagine. I shook those feelings away; I had to stand my ground if I didn't want him walking all over my persona. I was about to say another witty remark but then the doctor came out. The said spirit approached the doctor as he announced that Ryou was out of danger and that we can already see him. Out of respect for Ryou's current emotional state, I let his yami go in without me.
"Don't you dare hurt him in his state right now, or else…"
"Or else what?" I growl lowly; it seems he got his guise back.
"Or else you would go through hell and back if you so much as a fing-"
"I have already been through hell and back, even more than once, and trust me, they don't want me back there just yet." He sneered at me and proceeded inside Ryou's room. I just stare at the closed door.
"What had I gotten myself into?" I murmur to myself as I slumped down to my previous seat.
Bakura's POV
closed the door gently. I looked inside the room, and there he was. My little light. Ryou. I dashed to his side. He looked so peaceful, so angel- like in his sleep. I gazed at my hikari's face…
Weakling
That's what mortals are: weak and useless. Why? Because of that thing called love… that abhorrent sentiment of Achilles' heel…
..But you do care for him.. said that little voice inside my head. Yes, I do care for him… but I mustn't give in to these faults! If he disappears from my life, I can finally be rid of my weak point… my drawback… my limitation…
..Then why don't you just kill him now? Why wait for his departure? Look at him. He's so fragile… very much fragile now. Why not kill him now, and put an end to all of this crap?.. Kill him? No! I can never…
..Why not? Because you are in love with him… you care for too much… you can't bear to see him suffer… to see him die…
I held back a sob as reality squarely knocked into my cranium. I do love him! I just have been too much of a coward to actually admit it to myself… why hadn't I seen this before? Sure I have lusted for his body on more than one occasion, but that was just because I haven't had anyone for the past millennia. Anyone would have, were they in my shoes. But I have never thought of him as anything but just a piece of a goody- two- shoes who was still a very shy virgin who probably would have been a good fuck… I never thought I would fall in love with my light. No one would have, seeing as I always treated him like dirt.
Ryou stirred.
I looked at him again and this time, I caress his cheek. "Don't' worry Ry, everything will be alright."
I sighed and slumoed down to the chair next to his bed. Ryou, if you only knew how I much I really do care for you… how much I really do love you. Ryou I'm sorry I hurt you.
If I could change
I would
Take back the pain
I would
Retrace every wrong move that I made
I would
If I could stand up and take the blame
I would
If I could take all my shame to the grave
I would
I hunched down and clasped Ryou's small, pale hand in mine. I forced the tears back… but the crystalline drops wouldn't go away.
I was crying freely.
I haven't cried like this in years. Why now?
I knew the answer to that…
What?
Not what, who?
"Ba- Bakura? Is that you?"
Ryou…
"Ry…?" I averted my gaze to his face. "Oh Ra… I'm so… gl- glad you're finally awake… can you… can you… can you ever forgive me? I know I don't deserve your clemency… as you don't deserve to be hurt at all. I'm so sorry-"
"Oh Bakura," he said, smiling all the while, "it's okay… I…"
I put a shaky finger over beautiful cherry lips.
"Listen to me hikari no baka, I do love you and I do care for you… I just didn't know how to show it. I … I was a jerk about it and I regret that I ever harmed you…" I paused, sensing more tears threatening to spill. I turned my gaze away, looking at the floor, not meeting his intense stare.
"Kura…"
I looked up at him, and get shocked by his pained expression. Why was crying again? What did I do wrong?
And as if he was reading my thoughts, he suddenly said, "N- no, it's not your fault, I'm just happy… 'cause now I know how you really feel about me… and I- I really love you too, Bakura… aishiteru."
I smiled, my first real smile since my parents died in Kuruelna (1) Village. I caressed my tenshi cheek. Ryou smiled, blushing as he did so, and leaned in closer to me and I bent my head closer to his, making our foreheads touch. He looked at me with those innocent brown eyes, gazing in his special hikari- ish way. I pressed my lips to his soft ones, finally getting what I have been clandestinely romanticizing (2) for Ra knows how long. I ran my tongue through his lower lip, beseeching (3) for access. He granted me that and I thrust my tongue into his warm cavern, exploring every crevice I could find, memorizing everything Ryou had to offer. Ryou… mmm… he tastes like strawberries and… lobsters (?)
My Ryou kissed back, trying to fight for dominance. I mentally smirked at him, kissing him harder, initiating a tongue- filled war between the two of us.
I won.
I drew back, all too suddenly. Damn air!
"I love so much Bakura, please don't leave me…"
Ryou began to cry as if I was going to leave him forever… which in a sense is true. I shook my head as I put my arms around him, comforting him.
"No, Ryou baka, "I coo softly in his ear, "I won't leave you. I love. Don't cry, koi (4), shhh, it's okay Ry, I'm not going to leave. I'm not going to hurt you anymore… I love you…"
"Re- really?"
"Yes, habibi (5)… I promise you that." I kissed the top of his forehead, moving down to his luscious lips, licking away his hot salty tears on the way. I pulled away, and he smiled lovingly at me, our eyes shining with pent up emotions just waiting to be released. No, I can't tell him yet. Kaiba will just have to wait.
"Hush my little tenshi. sleep and rest, you need it."
His heavy eyelids drooped and his doe russet eyes finally closed as he murmured a final "I love you" before he fell asleep. I looked at his peaceful form, lying on the hospital bed, his passive face making my heart break.
"How can I give you up?" I say silently as I too was taken by the shadows…
-/-/-/-/-/--/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/
1 Is that right? I'm not sure 'bout the spelling folks, but according to Janime, the site where I got the info on Pharaoh's Forbidden memories, that's the name of Touzokou Bakura's village… yeah… and I'm shutting up now 'cause I'm giving away lotsa stuff… nyehehehehe!!! Me gwives shpwoilers!!!! Weeee!!!!
2 mwuahahahahaha!!!! Fear me Bakura!!! I'm making you sappy!!! (Bakura: hey!!! Ryou: I like a sappy Kura! . Bakura: ??) Romanticizing! What a woird!!! Yes I do mean woird, a combination of weird and word … woird!!!! Weeeee!!!! But back to the topic, do you think Bakura can be romantic? Pweeeeshe twell mwe…
3 as you can now see, I'm having fun with words!!!! Beseeching!!! Nyehehehe!!! Wait… besought is like the past tense of beseech, right? I was getting tired of pleading, begging and the like… you get the picture…
4 koi… that means 'love', right? As in the noun form… like when you say, "Can you hand me that spatula, love?", instead you say "Can you hand me that spatula, koi?" …why spatula? I dunno… and every time I try to type 'spatula', 'saptula' comes out… woird ne? (Baka-kura: maybe 'cuase you're soooo sappy!!! And my name's BAKURA, you dolt!!!)
5 sooo many author's note things in this chap!!! Well, as I've heard from my "always- out- of- the- country- to- work- in- the- middle- east- for- money- 'cause- it's- for- your- own- good" father, habibi means love, just like koi… only its Arabic, I think… he called just a while ago and he called mom habibi… I asked him what it means and the rest is history… how did I hear their conversation? Speaker phone rocks!!! Nyehehehehe!!! And I dunno how the hell Bakura's supposed to be speaking Arabic… sheez, it's a fanfic peepz!! I can bend the reality!!!
Gale: I hate school…
Yume: yeah, I know…
Yako: what's wrong? Is the torture house tormenting you more than usual?
Aya: hmm… I think I know why…
Yako: why?
Aya: the torture quarters is only giving them twelve days of vacation instead of the ususal two and a half weeks… and they piled up lotsa home works and there are several preliminary exams making their way to them once they get back to school… they're going to have something on genetics…
Yume: the horror!!!
Gale: no!!!!!!!! The dreadfulness of the dreaded
Yume and Gale: PUNNETT SQUARE!!!
DsGirls: dun dun DDDUUUUUNNNNNN!!!!!!!!
Gale: why?
Yume: what did we do wrong?
Ryou: aw… poor Yume and Gale….
Bakura: humph! Serves them right! They had no right whatsoever to try and separate us!!!! None at all!!!!
Ryou: Kura! That's sooo mean! Seto's gentler than you are… maybe-
Bakura: nnoo!!! Ryou! Aibou!!! Koi!!! Hikari!!! Tenshi!!! Habibi!!! Don't leave!!!!
Ryou: I wasn't going to leave Kura, I was just going to ask if Seto would kindly train you to be gentler…. That's all…
Bakura: oh…
Yako: we have
Aya: something to
Yume: tell you (nudges Gale)
Gale: why am I always the one saying the things that get them mad?!?!?!?!?!!?? Anyway, what we're trying to say is that we have hit a major case of writer's block and-
Yume: no we haven't!!!
Gale: no?
Yume: tell them the problem!!!
Gale: (looks stupid for a while… then smacks her head) oh yeah!!! W have school!!! That's the problem!!!! If we won't be able to finish this before vacation ends, then we'll be updating very slowly…. 'cause exams are up…
Yume: don't worry folks, we already have a written version of this, we only have to type them now… and that's the problem…
Aya: they don't have time…
Yako: so please be patient with them… they're going to finish this, don't worry…
Dsgirls: Don't own 'Easier to Run' by Linkin Park… no owning, no sueing!!!
Yami the real Kaiba: and no shoe eating? Heck! What's wrong with you authoresessseses?!?!?! What's with the shoe issues!?!?!?
Gale: shoe? Grrrr….. it's Berta's brother's fault!!!!!!
Aya: why? He ate your shoe?! (snickers at the background)
Gale: they stole my shoe!!!!!
All: what!!!
Gale: I just finished cleaning and washing my shoe and I just hanged up the said pair of shoes on the rack on the front of out house, as I always do. I went inside to get a drink then when I came back, my shoes were gone!!! Damn!!! And they were also new shoes!!!!
Yume: what!?!?!
Aya: and the only person outside that time was Berta's brother… let's say we just call him 'Berto'… meaning he was the one who took the shoes…
Bakura: hmm… sounds as if he got away with it…
Gale: he did!!! The jerk used to stealing stuff from his neighbors!!!! He even stole a pair of denim pants once…
All: (gasp) what!!!
Gale: or twice… trice… I dunno
Bakura: and he wears them?
Gale: no, how can my little shoe fit his ugly icky bulging feet? No, no, he sells them…
Bakura: how much do they actually and originally cost anyway?
Gale: more or less Php. 1200… about uhmmm… more or less $25… damn!!! And they were good looking blue shoes too!!! And I bought them with my own money!!! I saved up countless months' worth of allowance for those!!!
Bakura: want me to steal them back for you? I'll even get you some of the other stuff he stole…
Gale: why?
Bakura: For Christmas…
Gale: oh… that's okay, just tell the good readers what they got form us…
Bakura: (Changes to chibi form) otay!!! Ush would wike to thwankies:
Tashi-chan: yep!!! yous is wight!!! Sheto bwad!!!! bwad Sheto!!! oopsie... mweeated wobsters... mmmm.... goodie!!! here's more chapiesh!!! hopes yous wikes it!!!
DeathXStar: do mes gets dat wight? oh, yesh... hard to find... thankies!!!! we wuv yous!!!(suddenly pops neside you and gives you a bear hug) hopes yous wike de update!!!
dangerousgirl: O.O... yous hates mwe? (sniffs) why? mes did not mean to huwt Wyou.... me wuvs Wyou.... mes ish sowie... mes be gwood Bakuwa now!!! mes pwomise!!! thankies for weading!!!
ladywolf(Terri: yous ish wight!!! Wyou should deshide!!! mes go cwall Wyou and bad Sheto!!! wes shettle pwoblem now!!! thankies!!! bwarter chip? ish that wike chocolate chip cookies Wyou makes?
Ryou: no Kura.. that's something else...
C.Bakura: oh.... not foodie?
Ryou: no...
C.Bakura: otay...
Jazhira: ohhhwie!!!! me wikes yous name!!!! how yous get cwool name? thankies for your kwind weview!!!
Gale: don'y worry Jazhira- chan, this is going to be a BxR... don't worry... (reads your yami's threat) no!!!!! please don't kill us!!!! no!!!!
Aya: so... what type of flamethrower do you have? is it the 'newest' model?
Gale: can i borrow it?
Aya: what for?
Gale: so i can fry BERTA!!!!! grrrrr!!!!!! must kill BERTA!!!!!!
Aya: (shakes head) and they say i'm the psycho...
YourLilKittie: why yous no weviews? we mishes wyou....
Ryou: now give the nice reviewers their gifts, Kura...
C.Bakura: otay!!Yous gots a aw- aw- aw- me can't wead thwis!!!!
Ryou: that's 'autographed' Kura…
C.Bakura: Awtwogalpt? Otay… yous gots and awtwogalpt pictwule of us!!! Weeee!!!!
Ryou: (smiles cutely) yes, well, Kura said you guys are receiving an autographed picture of the YuGiOh cast… one white T-shirt that says "Slave For Bakura" on the front in black letters, one blue shirt that says "Slave for Ryou" on the front also in black letters, a box of (suddenly blushes and stops reading)
C.Bakura: what long (wrong) wid Wyou? (reads the list) cwo-cwo-cwo… can't wead this!!! C-o-n-d-o-m-s… cwondomosh? (pokes Ryou) What dat?
Ryou: KURA!!! I- I- (blushes intensely) I'll explain later okay? Moving on, to those who reviewed last time, they will get the promised pics of (insert couple of your choice) if we found their e mail…
C.Bakura: dat ol, ne?
Ryou: yes
C.Bakura: den twell mwe pweeze!!! Wat ish cwondomosh? Doesh Wyou use cwondomosh? Ish it gwood?
Ryou: (blushes ferociously) I- I- I-
Gale: that's it for now minna!!!!
Aya: enjoy the holidays!!!!
Yume: hope you guys have a long enough vacation!!! Ja ne!!!