Disclaimer: Alias belongs to JJ Abrams, ABC and the people at Bad Robot
Rating: R, for language and sexual themes in future chapters
Pairing: Sydney/Sark, suggested Sydney/Vaughn and Sark/Lauren
Summary: When Sydney makes the fatal mistake of trusting Sark with a gun in Man of His Word, Season 4, Sark takes the opportunity to revenge himself on Vaughn for Lauren's murder. However, after spending a prolonged time together, Sark and Sydney begin to develop feelings that neither of them anticipated.
Author's Note: An AU version of the events in Man of His Word. What might have happened had Sydney trusted Sark with a gun during the fight with Anna at the club.
Chapter: 13/14
Chapter 13- Charades
Vienna
It seemed to Vaughn that he had wallowed in darkness for an eternity. But slowly, very slowly, he was drifting back to a soft and beckoning light. The glow floated just above his head and he wanted desperately to reach it. He couldn't remember ever wanting anything as much as he wanted to reach the light. He tried to lift his arm to grasp it, but his limbs were heavy and he couldn't find the strength to bring the arm off of the bed he was laying on. Bed? Where had that thought come from? His vision spun and he was looking at a blonde man who was pulling a gun. The thought occurred to him dimly that he really should get out of the way. There was the sound of a gun going off and he became aware of an aching pain in his belly.
And then he was opening his eyes, conscious to the world for the only the second time in several days. His breath quickened and grew stronger. He couldn't lift his head from the pillow it was resting on, but his green eyes darted around, his instincts kicking in and forcing him to take in his surroundings. He assumed he was in a hospital room, judging by the whiteness of the walls and the wires hooked into his arms. There was a television on in the room and all voices coming from it were German. Then he must still be in Austria. His left hand fumbled along his stomach and found the bullet wound Sark had inflicted on him. It hurt like hell, but unless he was mistaken, it had been far worse and could now only get better.
There was the slow, low breath of someone who was breathing to his right. He rolled his head as much as he could to try and discern the identity of his companion. His breath caught at his eyes fell on the slumbering woman in the chair by his bed. Sydney Bristow was with him. He left out a long exhale in relief. She was dressed in black jeans and a yellow tank top that looked as though they had suffered a lot of ware. Her hair was no longer the caramel blonde of the woman in the photos with Sark, but back to her rich brunette. Her hair looked freshly washed and was tucked behind her ears. He felt a longing desire to twirl one of the brown strands around a finger. He reached out hopefully, but came up short.
His movement alerted the light sleeper, and her eyes shot open, giving him the chance to look into the deep brown eyes he had begun to fear he would never see again. Seeing him awake, those eyes filled with tears, though Sydney managed to give him a watery smile. "Vaughn," she whispered in a breathy voice.
"Hey," he said. A pregnant silence fell between them, and Vaughn felt all the hurt and betrayal come flooding back to him. This woman, the wonderful woman he had wanted to spend the rest of his life with, had betrayed him in order to sleep with the enemy. One part of him wanted to shout at her until she broke down into tears, while the other part of him wanted nothing more than to kiss her. Sydney still held that power over him, at least.
Sydney rushed into the silence. "Vaughn, I'm so sorry," she said swiftly, her voice choking with emotion. There were tears in her eyes. "You must hate me, and I couldn't say I would blame you. I was stupid and hurtful, and just completely disregarded every, wonderful thing we had. I know that we can't go back to where we were, and I don't think we should even try. For one, I don't deserve that courtesy." The tears were now slipping down her cheeks, and it was enough to break Vaughn's heart. "I was…I was so stupid and confused. Somehow he made me think that what we…you and I…had wasn't love, but infatuation. And, I hate to think, that maybe a part of me was still angry about Lauren. But God, it doesn't matter. All that matters is that I am going to spend the rest of my life making it up to you. Please don't be angry forever."
She ended in a huge rush of words, realizing perhaps that she had started to blabber on with little point. She bowed her head, unable to meet the betrayed green eyes looking out of the face she had once thought the most handsome in the world. "Come here," Vaughn said, hoarsely, reaching out for her.
She obeyed quickly, coming to sit with him on the bed. One of his hands reached up to cup her face, while the other grasped her hands in her lap. He paused before answering, allowing himself to run his hands through her dark, damp hair. "I'm not angry," he finally said, forcing her chin up so she would look at him. "I'm not saying I wasn't…believe me, I was pretty furious at one point. But now, despite everything…I'm just happy to have you back."
A weak smile lit Sydney's face. "Did you leave him?" Vaughn couldn't help answer. "Why did you come back?"
Sydney bit her lip, and leaned into Vaughn's hand, taking some comfort from it. "Nadia found me and told me that you were dying. And I realized that, my place was here with you."
Vaughn grinned. "I've really missed you, Syd," he said softly. "And I'm glad you're back."
Sydney licked her lips, but then replied, almost so prompt Vaughn didn't question her earnestness. "Me too," she agreed. "But, you had better get some sleep…natural that is. The doctors would likely kill me if they knew I was keeping you from your rest." She leaned over and kissed his cheek swiftly, then stood and made her way to the door.
"Syd?" Vaughn called her back. She turned at the door.
"What is it?"
"You'll still be here when I wake up, right?"
"Of course, silly," she smiled. "I'm here for good."
Vaughn laid back in the bed, content for the first time in months.
Vaughn's recovery was swift and the doctors were impressed. In little over a week, they agreed that he was well enough to be transferred back to Los Angeles. During that week, Nadia, Weiss and Dixon had all travelled back, leaving Sydney and Jack to accompany Vaughn back when he was ready. On the morning of their departure, Sydney and Jack hired a car to take them first to the hospital and then to Vienna International Airport. Jack and Sydney had used the week to make amends in their father-daughter relationship. For the first time Sydney had felt the terrible feeling of having her father disappointed in her. It was more than enough to halt any wandering thoughts of returning to Sark.
"I expect you're looking forward to heading back home," Jack observed, pulling out of the CIA safe house.
"I'm looking forward to seeing my apartment and Marshall and everyone," Sydney agreed. "But I doubt my first couple days back are going to be all that amazing. Full of debriefs and psyche evaluations. Not that I don't deserve it."
Jack glanced over at her. "Actually, you shouldn't be too hard-pressed. The CIA was not ever aware that you had entered a relationship with Sark. You only have to convince Sloane your intentions were pure."
"Oh, great," Sydney moaned. "Closeted up with Arvin Sloane for hours on end." She paused, watching the Austrian townhouses fly by. "Actually, I think perhaps that is a very just punishment. Better than anything I would have contrived."
"I don't think you need to punish yourself any longer," Jack said, haltingly. "I think the guilt you feel now is punishment enough. I truly understand what you're feeling, Sydney. Finding out the truth about your mother was the most reeling, awful experience I have ever been through. I would never put anyone through the despair of finding a person they loved was betraying them all along."
"Dad, don't try and comfort me," Sydney said wearily. "I don't deserve it. Unlike you, I knew exactly what Sark was. I still don't understand how I could have been so blind!"
"I knew what your mother was," Jack said unexpectedly. "Or…at least the second time."
"Second time?" Sydney's eyebrows sky-rocketed. "What second time?"
Jack's cheek appeared tinged a very soft red. "Just before your mother escaped CIA custody…while we were travelling together. We had a slight lapse back into our relationship as man and wife. Love can be…a little blinding at times."
"Apparently," nodded Sydney. She found her thoughts suddenly on her dead mother. "I really think she loved you, Dad. I mean, despite everything, a part of her truly cared for you and thought of you as her husband."
"Perhaps," Jack thought. There was a pain in his eyes, and Sydney realized he was reliving the pain of killing the woman he loved to protect his daughter. Impulsively, Sydney reached out a hand and squeezed her father's arm.
"I love you," she said simply when he shot her a questioning gaze. A smile softened his usually hard and impenetrable facial expressions. They pulled into the hospital parking lot, and saw Vaughn was already waiting for them outside the front doors. He was sitting in a wheel chair, with an attendant waiting patiently behind him. Vaughn saw them and raised his hand in greeting.
Sydney returned it and waved. Her pace did not increase in the least. Jack shot her a questioning glance that she didn't return. "Michael Vaughn has become a good man," he said suddenly.
"He always was a good man," Sydney said quickly. "You just never wanted to see it."
"Not so," denied Jack. "I just continually wonder if he's the man for you."
Sydney said nothing, so Jack continued. "Love may be blind, Sydney. But the one thing your mother taught me is that no matter how awful the person is, and what terrible things they do, that love will not and cannot be ignored."
"Yes, it can," Sydney said harshly under her breath as they drew closer to Vaughn. "I will conquer this. I will."
Jack watched his daughter's reunion with Agent Vaughn silently, feeling pity for all three lovers, even the cold British spy who was somewhere alone in the world. "Ready to get home?" Sydney asked Vaughn, who had managed to get himself out of the wheel chair. The attendant bid them good day and returned to the hospital.
"Definitely," Vaughn nodded. "I can't wait to have a home cooked meal. Or even a warmed up Hungry Man. Austrian hospital food, I am sad to report, is actually worse than hospital food in America."
"Impossible!" Sydney gasped in mock horror.
"No, no," Vaughn disagreed. "I'm French…I never lie about food, women or wine."
Sydney looped her arm through one of Vaughn's amiably. "Well, I'll tell you what. When we get home, I'll make you roast beef, mashed potatoes and whatever vegetable you'd like. If you can wait until after Sloane's interrogation."
"I'd wait forever," Vaughn said softly, trying to steer the playful conversation to more serious matters suddenly.
"Well, that's exactly how long you might have to, unless Sloane has changed a good deal since I left," Sydney continued breezily. She ducked into the car, letting go of Vaughn's arm. He sighed, and met eyes with Jack across the roof of the government issued black car. Jack could not help shrugging in sympathy, before opening the driver's side door.
Los Angeles
Two Months Later
"Good morning, Nadia, Sydney," greeted Arvin Sloane as they entered the modern-decorated APO conference room on a Friday in February. Jack and Marshall Flinkman were already there, waiting for the rest of the co-workers to begin the daily meeting to discuss the world at large and their current or upcoming projects.
Two months had passed relatively swiftly since Sydney had returned to Vaughn in Vienna. Life had fallen almost back to the pace it had once retained before the grievous mission with Sark. Nadia and Sydney were still living together in Sydney's apartment. Weiss, now sans crutches, made an excellent neighbour and was very often over for dinner, staying late with his girlfriend. More than once, Sydney had woken up to find Weiss had not managed to leave during the night. Vaughn was also a frequent visitor. He had managed a full recovery. Sydney and he had made no attempt at rekindling their relationship, though not for lack of desire on his behalf. He was patient though, and reminded himself they had all the time in the world. Which did not make him any less giddy at the thought of their private dinner date that evening.
Vaughn exchanged smiles with Sydney as he entered the conference room with Eric. Unlike Vaughn, Sydney was not looking forward to the evening. Her nerves were jumping up and down in a way they never had around Vaughn before. She quickly averted her eyes, engaging Nadia in a conversation going over the finer details of their last mission to Denmark. Sydney had easily regained the trust of Arvin Sloane and had returned to duty little less than a week after returning to Los Angeles. She and Nadia were becoming quite the team and rarely let APO down. In fact, everyone at headquarters seemed eager to put the past behind and continue on as though it had never happened. Sydney grinned widely as her dearest friend and old partner, Dixon entered. He was still as handsome and gentle as ever, and had not altered in his affections towards the younger agent one iota. He came and sat on her other side now, apologizing softly for his tardiness.
Yes, life was going well for Sydney. She had excellent friends, a new understanding with her father, the regained trust of her boss and a promising relationship with Michael Vaughn. She should have been perfectly happy, but it didn't take a CIA analyst to tell something was eating up inside of Sydney. She hadn't exactly admitted it out loud to herself or anyone else, but her thoughts continued drifting back to the spy she had left behind. She hadn't forgiven him for what he had done to her, but she was continuously running over his last words to her over and over again in her mind. "I love you and I always will. You changed me, you've made me a better person. Please don't throw away this amazing thing we have." Somehow, now back in LA with everything reverted back to the way it was, she wasn't entirely sure she had made the right decision.
The voice of Arvin Sloane intervened on her private thoughts. "The news I have for all of you today may bring forward…certain passions and emotions that are better left deeply buried. I have requested the case to be shunted to another department, but Director Chase is adamant it is a matter for Authorized Personnel Only division. That being said, I would ask that you all please save all emotional outbursts until I'm finished." He shot a piercing glance at Vaughn, but was clearly avoiding any eye contact with Sydney. She glanced over at Jack and noticed his face was decidedly grim. A tingling feeling of anticipation that she could not explain suddenly fluttered in her stomach.
Sloane pointed a small remote to the flat screened television on the wall opposite the table. The image of a man Sydney had wished she would never see again, flicked into life. Sark was waiting to cross a street that looked as though it was situated in Brighton, England. He had a cell phone to one ear and looked just as ravishingly handsome as Sydney remembered. She glanced down quickly at the table, hoping to block out the image. Unfortunately, the image had spread to all of the computers sitting around the table, so her eyes were accosted there as well. The reactions of her coworkers had been as predictable as one might think. Jack had grown only more grimmer, while Dixon's dark forehead was wrinkled with troubled thoughts. Nadia had laid a comforting hand on Sydney's arm, though Sydney could find no comfort in the contact. Marshall had let out what could almost be described as a whimper and Vaughn had crackled his knuckles under the table. Weiss let out a low hiss of air that did nothing to ease the stifling tension.
Sloane, the only one who made no noticeable reaction, continued on his cool voice. "Mr. Julian Sark, as most of you are aware, has been one of our most important targets for the past four months. Yesterday, one of my contacts in Brighton took this picture of Mr. Sark. They also continued to track him, giving his position to M15. Last night, a group of M15 agents invaded the hotel Mr. Sark was staying in. Details are still cloudy, but we do know that two M15 agents were killed and Sark received a wound that the team leader thought could be serious. Nevertheless, Mr. Sark managed to escape through a laundry chute and is still considered to be at large."
"Do we know where he went after that?" Dixon inquired, taking notes on a pad of paper he had taken to carrying around in his breast pocket after his time as Director at Langley.
"No," Sloane admitted. "And that is the task Director Chase has assigned to us. She says all our resources must be bent on finding and exterminating him."
"What exactly do you mean by exterminating?" Sydney asked before she could stop herself.
Sloane shot her a wry look before answering in an extremely dry voice. "Coming from the verb 'exterminate,' it means to terminate, to eradicate or to utterly destroy. I believe its Latin based stemming from 'termino,' to remove."
Cold fury seething in her stomach, Sydney tossed her pen down on the desk and stalked out of the conference room as Sloane continued his definition of exterminate. She fought back angry tears and didn't bother to resist slamming the door behind her. "So much for saving emotional outbursts until I was finished," Sloane remarked dryly.
"You are a cold-hearted son of a bitch, you know that?" Vaughn snarled. "She didn't deserve that. You know it's a touchy subject with her."
"Thank you for that…interesting and no doubt valid opinion, Agent Vaughn," Sloane snapped. "I would have thought the subject would be far more touchy to you, than to your young lover. Unless you've managed to lose her to another man again?"
Vaughn sat back in his seat, blown away by the coldness of Sloane's retorts and realizing he was sparring with his boss in defence of Sark of all people. "Thank you," Sloane said coldly. "Now, moving on."
The doorbell rang, taking Sydney out of her reverie. She had been sitting on her bed, staring listlessly at her bedroom wall for the first time in two months letting her thoughts dwell unchecked on Sark. As hard as she had tried to forget him, she had only ended up missing him more than she thought possible. Her heart ached at the thought of him hunted down like a dog by the CIA…by her friends and family. Nadia had called about forty-five minutes ago, explaining that she was working late. Not for the first time was Sydney grateful that her sister understood the occasional need to solitude.
She was thankful for the unexpected visitor though. Solitude had lost its comfort and now she only wanted spirited company to get her mind off her despair. "Coming!" she called out, rushing to the door.
She pulled it open to reveal Vaughn, smiling warmly at her. He was carrying a bag of steaming delivery food in one hand and bouquet of lilies in the other. "Flowers to make you smile," he offered her the beautiful bouquet. "And Chinese food to make you forget everything that bothers you."
Sydney felt her heart melt and she couldn't help but smile. "Oh, Vaughn, they're beautiful." She took the flowers and breathed in their heady scent. "Lilies are…"
"…your favourites," he finished. "I know. Can I come in?"
"Oh, yeah, of course," Sydney nodded, opening the door wider. "Nadia's still at the office."
Vaughn made his way to the kitchen and began to pull out cartons of Chinese food. "I figured after a day like that, you'd much rather eat in than face the world just yet."
"You know me far too well," Sydney agreed, finding a vase in one of the kitchen counters. She placed the lilies inside and filled it with water. "And I can't get over how beautiful these flowers are."
Vaughn paused from dishing out the Chinese food on two separate plates. Sydney saw he had filled her plate with all her favourites, remembering she couldn't stand egg rolls. "Just like you," he observed softly.
Sydney blushed and tried to laugh off the earnest compliment and lighten the mood. "Stop it, you're making me blush," she grinned. She placed the lilies on the dining room table, before setting the table. The sun had set a while ago, so she lit a few candles, rather than have the glaring overhead light. "Nadia bought a nice red wine last night. I'll just go grab it."
She made her way to her the bar in the living room and paused just out of Vaughn's sight, leaning against the wall. She couldn't take it if he used this evening to try romancing her. Right now, all she needed was a friend. She took a deep breath and grabbed the red wine, hoping her old handler was wise enough to see that.
"Welcome back," Vaughn greeted as she returned.
She gestured with the bottle. "You know where the glasses are?" He nodded and brought over two glasses to the table. She poured and they settled down to dinner. Vaughn had brought chop sticks, knowing Sydney would eat Chinese food no other way. She did so deftly, eagerly chewing on fried rice. Vaughn was managing his chop sticks quite poorly. He attempted to spear an egg roll and it got it half way to his mouth before it tumbled into his lap. He scooped it out, clearly hoping Sydney hadn't seen. She snorted, giving away her lack of oblivion.
"Oh, shut up," he growled.
"Not the most cultured man, are we?" she teased lightly.
"Maybe not in Eastern customs," Vaughn admitted, after a successful go at the egg roll. "I should have made you French food."
"I wouldn't have eaten your cooking," Sydney promised him.
"I seem to remember a certain burnt roast you managed to pull off," Vaughn reminded her.
"That was not my fault!" Sydney protested. Nadia, Eric, Vaughn and she had all had a little too much to drink and Sydney had temporarily forgotten the roast she had been cooking to make things up to Vaughn.
"You still haven't made me that dinner," Vaughn chided.
"Keep it up like this and you won't get it," warned Sydney.
"I'll be good," Vaughn promised, raising his hand in a salute. "Boy Scout's Honour."
Sydney broke into laughter, and Vaughn couldn't help but stare back at her hungrily. Her brown hair was pulled into a messy bun, leaving strands framing her face. Her brown eyes were sparkling in the candlelight. He could almost pretend that Sark had never happened, that Lauren had never happened. For that one moment they were back, just after the downfall of the Alliance where it seemed a sure thing that they were heading for happily ever after.
As Vaughn had lost himself in happy thoughts, Sydney's laughter had died down and she had noticed Vaughn's stare, which left her in no doubt of his feelings towards her. She only wished that she could return them just as strongly. There was a part of her that might be a little in love with Vaughn, but at the moment, after such strong reflections on Sark, she couldn't even entertain the thought of moving on. "Stop looking at me like that," she begged.
"I can't help it," Vaughn said softly. He reached across the small table and caught Sydney's hand in his own. "I've been trying to move slowly. I know you need time…that we both need time…but I can't go on without saying anything. I'm in love with you, Syd. I always have been and I always will be. It's been two months…can't we…couldn't you even think about it? I don't care about Sark anymore…it's all in the past to me."
"This isn't just about Sark, Vaughn," Sydney sighed deeply. She withdrew her hand. "Things were hardly perfect before I was kidnapped. This is about the two of us and where we are. We both know its not where we were. Lauren effectively ruined that relationship. I'm not sure we'll ever be able to get back there…or if we should even try."
"This is about Lauren?' Vaughn said, eyes growing hard. "Sydney, I have been trying to make amendments from that almost since the very day you came back. I never loved her, I was just trying to get over you. I thought you were dead."
"You married her, Michael," she said bitterly. "You were clearly at least a little in love with you."
"We've been over this, Syd," he growled. "I was dying without you. I had to move on or it would have been the end of me. Besides, this isn't about Lauren anymore."
"I know it isn't about Lauren!" Sydney burst out. "I don't know what its about." She paused. "No, that's not right. I know exactly what its about."
"Well, I would really appreciate being let in on that little tidbit of information," Vaughn snarled.
"You say you don't care about Sark, that is all in the past to you," Sydney said softly. "And that might be true, I don't know. The thing is…it's not my past yet. I haven't moved on yet, Vaughn. I thought I could, but now I'm not sure anymore."
"You're still in love with him?" Vaughn exclaimed, eyes widening in shock and anger.
"I didn't say that," Sydney quickly corrected. "I just said…well, what I meant to say…is that I need more time."
"Well, how much more time?" Vaughn demanded.
"I don't know," shrugged Sydney. "He meant a lot of me. And even after all he did and all that's happened…I realized today that he still does. Despite my wishes."
Vaughn covered his mouth with his hand. "I don't believe it," he said hollowly. "I don't think I have ever heard such complete bullshit."
"Excuse me, I'd appreciate it if you didn't just assume I'm making it up," Sydney said, her own anger rising. "Maybe you're capable of just deciding to move on, but some of us need time and patience from our loved ones."
"Don't you dare belittle my feelings for you!" snapped Vaughn, standing up. "You have no idea what it feels like to see someone you love buried and know you're never going to have the opportunity to tell that person you wanted to spend every day of your life with them."
"I know exactly how that feels!" Sydney shouted, rising as well. "In case you've forgotten, I discovered my fiancé dead in our bathtub! And it took me a hell of a long time to move on, even though I, unlike you, had the proof of a body!"
Vaughn's face contorted in rage. "I don't have to listen to this," he said coldly. He pushed back his chair and head for the door. He opened it, shrugging on his jacket. "Call me when the girl I fell in love with decides to come back!"
"This is the real Sydney," Sydney said, staring down at the half-eaten food. "You just never wanted to see her."
Vaughn made no reply, just leaving and slamming the door shut. Sydney sunk down into her chair and covered her eyes with her hands, sobbing despite her best attempts to hold herself together.
Nadia shut down her computer and shrugged into her jacket. She pulled her pony tail out of her collar and gathered her briefcase. She was wearier than she should have been, though that could have been emotional weariness. Supporting Sydney had hardly been a piece of cake the last couple months. Her older sister had made a very good show of contentment, but when the lights turned off in their apartment, it was Nadia who could overhear her tossing in her sleep and occasionally crying out 'Julian!' And after this morning's outburst she wasn't expecting to return home to a happy Sydney. She had overheard Vaughn mentioning to Eric that he intended to head over and try and cheer Sydney up. Nadia only hoped that he had been successful.
She gathered her time card and punched out. She headed for the concealed entrance to APO, hoping she was facing a long subway ride. She had just reached the part of the hallway that became piping and unfinished, when a somewhat flustered voice called after her. "Miss Sloane…Miss Santos…Nadia!"
She turned to see Marshall Flinkman hurrying after her, clutching a file to his chest. He halted, breathing heavily. "What is it, Marshall?" she asked sweetly. She had a very special place in her heart for the bumbling head of Op Tech at APO.
"Its just…well…you know how you asked me to keep working on cracking the protection on that call…the call that tipped us off to Sark being at the Austrian mansion?"
"Yes," nodded Nadia, encouraging him to continue.
"I've been working on it…not as much as I could have been, which is why its taken me such a ridiculously long time…I'm quite a busy man, what with raising little Mitchell and helping save the world…not that Carrie will listen to that excuse any more if I'm not home promptly on Thursdays so she can head out on her girls night….have I showed you the latest Mitchell pictures? He's growing up so fast…and so smart just like his…"
"Marshall, the phone call?" prompted Nadia, not quite as amused with his harmless babble as was usually the case.
"Oh, right!" he grinned, still looking excited. "Well, I've cracked it. And it was no little task…he's a crafty one. See, he sent the call out to several satellites and then mirrored the signal to several different phone booths all over the world…but I already knew it was a cell phone that made the call. So I had to track every signal until I came to the one that was a cell phone. I mean, the man's a genius…and that's coming from me. It's no wonder he eluded you so long, no offence, of course."
"Who made the call, Marshall?" Nadia finally snapped, quickly losing her patience.
"Well…that's why it's so odd," frowned Marshall.
"Why is it odd?" Nadia inquired through gritted teeth.
"The call came from the mansion in Innsbruck," Marshall explained. "From the cell phone we know to be in the possession of Mr. Sark."
Nadia's eyes, narrowed in impatience, flew open wide. "Excuse me?"
The key in the lock made Sydney's head turn from the television. She was watching BBC's adaptation of Pride and Prejudice and for perhaps the first time, finding no pleasure in the attractiveness of Colin Firth. "Hey," Nadia greeted softly. She laid her briefcase and a grocery bag on the table and shrugged out of her coat.
"Hi," Sydney said, unable to force any semblance of happiness into her voice.
"Is Vaughn gone?" Nadia inquired innocently enough.
"Oh, yes," Sydney laughed bitterly. "I think he'll be gone for quite some time."
"Do I want to know?" Nadia inquired, exiting to her room. Sydney could hear her dresser draws open and knew her sister was changing into something more comfortable.
"Probably not," Sydney answered in a raised voice to reach her sister. "I just think its safe to say Vaughn and I will not be resuming a romantic relationship any time soon."
"And does that upset you?" Nadia asked, coming out dressed in sweatpants and a baggy tee-shirt. She rummaged around the grocery bag, clunking around in the kitchen.
"Not as much as it should," Sydney replied dryly, her eyes watching Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy engage in their first, infamous dance.
Nadia came over to the couch and handed Sydney a pint of coffee flavoured ice cream and a large spoon. "Figured you'd need this after a day like the one you've had."
"You have no idea," Sydney agreed, shovelling a huge spoonful into her mouth.
"What's this?" Nadia asked, opening her own pint of vanilla raspberry smoothie.
"Please tell me you're joking!" Sydney gasped. "This is Pride and Prejudice…tell me you watched this like all proper women in 1995."
"Nope," Nadia admitted, sucking away happily on her spoonful. "Who's the guy she's dancing with?"
"Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy," sighed Sydney. "He's the perfect specimen of a man."
"Impossible," Nadia laughed. "Though he is quite nice to look at."
"Oh, yes," Sydney nodded fervently. She snuggled up next to Nadia. "Real men suck."
Nadia abandoned her spoon to run her fingers through Sydney's hair. "Not all real men," she disagreed.
"Yes, they do," protested Sydney. "Noah. Simon. Vaughn. And Sark. Most definitely Sark."
Nadia paused in smoothing down her sister's hair. "Syd, get up and put the movie on pause. There are some things you need to know."
Alert to her sister's serious tone, Sydney did as she asked. "What's up, honey?" she inquired, hoping Nadia was perfectly fine. "Are you okay?"
"Oh, I'm fine," Nadia assured her. "It's about Sark…Marshall just gave me some interesting news."
"Did they catch him?" Sydney asked, fear flooding her.
"No, no, not yet," Nadia assured her. "Look…do you remember I told you we got an anonymous phone call that tipped us off to Sark's location?"
"Yes," Sydney nodded in confirmation.
"I asked Marshall to keep trying to find out where it came from. He cracked it this evening," Nadia paused, watching her sister's face for any sign of realization. "Sark made the call, Syd. He was trying to take down the Guild."
Sydney's face was carefully blank. "It could have been a trap…one to get Vaughn in shooting range," she said calmly, clearly trying to avoid any hopes.
"I don't think so," Nadia disagreed. "It was too risky. He could have easily been captured himself. I really believe he was trying to end the Guild so he could start a life with you. I've had my doubts ever since I saw the first surveillance photos, but this confirms it for me. Syd, he's in love with you."
Sydney slumped back in the couch. "He might have been," she sighed. "But who knows? He certainly isn't anymore."
"What makes you think that?" frowned Nadia.
"Well, for one, I tried to kill him," Sydney answered. "And he didn't even try to stop me leaving."
"Actually…he kind of did," Nadia said, looking embarrassed.
"Excuse me?" Sydney frowned. "What do you mean by that?"
"He came to the airport…just as we were getting ready to board," Nadia confessed. "He was just about to call out your name, but I gave him a look that made it pretty clear he shouldn't do anything."
"And you didn't tell me?" Sydney cried, slightly hurt.
"I wanted to make sure you got on that plane," Nadia said defensively. "Vaughn was dying."
Sydney smiled softly to show her sister she wasn't angry. "Its all right. I was so furious at that moment, I would have just shot at him again."
"And then they never would have let us get on the plane," Nadia pointed out, voice light.
"True that," Sydney grinned.
They sat in silence, both clearly lost in thought. But eventually Nadia couldn't keep her curiosity in check. "So…what are you going to do?"
"Right now?" Sydney raised an eyebrow. She recovered her ice cream from the coffee table. "I'm going to eat this entire pint of ice cream and finish watching Colin Firth look absolutely gorgeous. Then I'm going to go to bed and try to figure out what all this means."
"Good plan," Nadia complimented her, returning to her own ice cream.
"I know," Sydney nodded, pressing Play and sinking back into the couch.
Vaughn tried to keep quiet as he approached her back. He had been wandering around trying to find her for the entire day. He had gone home last night, feeling hurt and ill-used. But that morning he had woken up feeling regretful and at peace with their situation. It was amazing what a good night's sleep could do. He had returned to Sydney's apartment at noon, but Nadia explained she had gone out. He then checked at Jack's house, APO, the train station, the observatory, even their old warehouse. The wharf was his last guess, and, as the sun set over the ocean, he found her leaning against the railing and watching the red and orange sky.
She was dressed in jeans and was wearing a full length beige coat. Her hair was loose and blowing in the wind. Vaughn felt love for this woman fill his heart, but he could finally recognize it as the love one felt for a dear friend or sibling. Not a future wife or even girlfriend prospect. That romantic love for Sydney Bristow had finally left him. "Hey," he said, standing behind her.
She turned, startled, but he was relieved to see a soft smile paint her otherwise sorrowful features. "Hi," she said with a deep breath. He walked up to lean beside her and they stood in companionable silence, watching the sun fade.
"How are you?" he inquired.
"Better," she answered. "You?"
"Good," he replied, and was pleased to find it wasn't a lie. "I'm sorry about last night, Syd."
"Don't worry about it," she shrugged. "I'm the one who should be sorry…I've made quite a mess of everything."
"I don't think this is something you can blame on one person," Vaughn countered. "I think the two of us should have figured out a long time ago, you really can't go back. What we had was a wonderful, once in a life time kind of love. But that doesn't necessarily mean it's the right kind of love. And I want you to know, even though it's over, I don't regret a single moment of it."
"Me neither," Sydney agreed, and there were tears in her eyes.
"You've been crying far too much, Syd," Vaughn said soothingly, and wiping gently at the teardrops trickling down her cheeks. "He makes you happy. I can't stand a lifetime of seeing you cry."
"How can I go back to him?" she asked, despair in her voice. "He shot you, Vaughn. For no reason! He used me and even if he's changed…he's one of the most wanted people in the world."
"They won't catch him," Vaughn assured her. "The CIA's been trying to get their hands permanently on Sark for as long as you and I can remember. It'll never happen. And as for shooting me…it wasn't exactly for no reason."
"What?"
"He shot in self-defence," Vaughn admitted. "I grew…very angry, very quickly while we were talking. I'm not saying I wasn't coaxed and taunted, but I lost it over nothing but spiteful words between rival lovers. I drew my gun first. Sark only shot because I was trying to kill him."
Sydney said nothing for quite some time, clearly trying to take this in. "Oh, God…" she murmured finally. "This is all one great big mess."
"The solution is pretty clear to me," Vaughn replied.
"All of that…however much good it does to his character…doesn't change the fact that he tried to use me," Sydney complained. "I mean…he may have never loved me. Or doesn't love me anymore."
"Then he's crazy," Vaughn laughed. "The only problem, is that you're still standing here talking to me, when you should be trying to find Julian Sark. God, I can't believe I just said that."
"I don't know where to find him," Sydney said, staring into the fading sun.
"You told me once, you can always find the one you love," Vaughn pointed out. "So, what are you waiting for?"
A smile was twitching on Sydney's lips, but still she lingered. "Are you sure you're going to be all right?"
Vaughn scoffed. "Are you kidding? Of course!" He allowed himself a smirk. "I got over you once, after all."
"Asshole," Sydney swatted him lightly.
"Yeah…maybe," Vaughn agreed. He kissed her lightly on the cheek. "I've loved every second of life with you…right from the moment you stormed into my office with Bozo red hair. Love you, girl."
"I love you too," she smiled.
"Not like you love him," Vaughn reminded her. "Now get going!" Without another word, he turned, trying not to look back. He looked at the boulevard, lit by the fading sun and then back, but Sydney had already gone. And he could not mourn for her.
"Look out!" cried a female voice before someone was crashing into him. They both crashed to the floor. "Oh, God, I am so sorry. I'm such a klutz." He found himself staring into the vividly blue eyes of a young woman.
"Its okay," he assured her, helping her to her feet. She was quite cute, he found himself thinking.
"My sister insisted I try roller-blading," she explained, still clutching on to him. "But I'm beginning to think it was a ridiculous idea." She held out a hand. "Hey. Elizabeth Thomson."
"Michael Vaughn," he grinned. "Look…you seem kind of shaken up. Do you want to go grab a drink at that snack vendor? I hear they come highly recommended by preteens everywhere."
"Yeah, that'd be great," she agreed, with a cheerful laugh. "Anything to get out of these stupid skates." She took off her helmet and Vaughn's already smiling face grew wider.
Bubblegum pink hair.