A/N: I'd like to thank all my lovely reviewers. I do it for you. Okay… and me, but you guys keep me going. ;)

Thank you Mel, Donna, Susan, Geena, Nicole and, just recently, Mac3. Because of you, I actually know that people are reading. Thanks so very much. That's all an author could want.

Chapter 6: Trepidation

"Well if you should nervously break down

When its time for the shakedown would you take it

It's when you cry just a little but you laugh in the middle that you've made it"

–Tonight (not again) by Jason Mraz

Horatio woke up from a difficult sleep a few hours later with the sunshine and, seeing Calleigh's bare arm covered with goose bumps, he pulled the sheet up over her shoulder and looked over at Darian. Yes, there was no mistaking it, he was the source of Horatio's sudden awakening. He embraced it because holding Darian brought a peacefulness that he hadn't found in weeks, though the amount of sleep was scarce.

He slipped out of bed and succeeded in making Darian stay quiet. Calleigh must have been extremely tired because she didn't even stir. It was true that she was starting to get immune to Darian's crying, but her instincts were there, always alert. He rubbed Darian's back, carrying him out into the kitchen, warming up a bottle of milk while he made himself a cup of black tea - one teaspoon of sugar, a dash of milk - just like he liked it, leaving a second cup behind on the counter, so when Calleigh awoke, she'd only need to boil the water - the teaspoon of sugar already dumped in the bottom of the cup.

Thoughtfully, and thinking he needed to after last night, Horatio left Calleigh a note, slipping the corner of the small piece of paper under Calleigh's cup so it wouldn't get misplaced.

Horatio took Darian's warmed bottle and turned his arm to test the temperature of the milk. Satisfied, he wiped the few drops on his tee shirt and cradled his son. Feeding him half of the bottle of milk until Darian had had enough, Horatio drank some of his tea between the burpings of his son.

Darian was back in bed in no time, having been thoroughly burped and changed.

Horatio changed excessively fast, making sure he wouldn't disturb the two sleeping siblings. On his way to work, Horatio was preoccupied. He loved Calleigh so very much. Perhaps, too much. He was glad she had a few more weeks of staying home because he felt himself changing and, although he didn't like it, he couldn't help it. There was fear there. Fear for his wife, fear for the mother of his child…

Calleigh awoke turning towards the side Horatio normally occupied. She knew he wouldn't be there, but she still checked. She shifted in bed, lying on her back and stared up at the ceiling. Whatever was bothering him, she'd be there for him – just like she promised him on their wedding day. Tears were starting the cloud her eyesight as she thought of how she had acted last night. She hated herself.

Darian chose that moment to wiggle his limbs in his crib. Calleigh caught the movement and turned her head, a tear slipped down from the corner of her eye as she did so. She wiped it away, getting up to see her baby.

Calleigh leaned on the side of the crib and teared up again seeing Darian's blue eyes. Identical to Horatio's blue eyes. In her moment of distress, she started imagining the worst case scenario and how difficult it would be to take care of Darian alone when he reminded her so much of Horatio. She covered her eyes with her hand, holding back from crying any more. No. He just needed a vacation; he wasn't leaving her. He wasn't going anywhere without her, he told her he loved her and she believed him. She trusted him.

She picked up her son, caressing his tiny red head of hair. "You're such a good boy," she murmured in his neck. Another thing he had in common with Horatio; he smelled so good. Calleigh suddenly became dubious and undid a few snaps of the leg of the clean jumper Darian had on to check his diaper. "Daddy changed your diaper, didn't he? And dressed you."

She suddenly touched her face – she couldn't believe it - she was smiling, through tears, she was smiling. Horatio, anguished or not, placed others before him and that made her smile and want to go see him, be with him and follow his lead. He wanted to go on a trip, to take a few days off of work? Fine. If that's all he wanted and needed, she go along with it.

Calleigh rested Darian on the bed for a moment to put a robe on. She picked him up again and ambled into the kitchen and saw the cup with the note under it.

Good Morning, love,

Enjoy your tea at your pace this morning- you don't have to get up with me every time.

I'll call you later.

Horatio xxx

Calleigh took the note and pressed in against her bust, remembering that Susie was taking Darian today and she could go surprise Horatio at work.

Calleigh walked over to the other counter and picked up her cordless phone and dialled Susie.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Susie," She started boiling water.

"Hi, Calleigh,"

"I just wanted to let you know that I'll get ready and come by to leave Darian with you. Does the offer still stand?"

"Of course. That's fine. Come by whenever."

"I'll see you later, then."

"Yep."

Calleigh ended the conversation and waited for the kettle to whistle. After submerging the teabag and sugar with hot water, she picked up her cup and swigged the hot liquid that warmed her on its way down. Humming appreaciatively, Darian looked up at his mom.

"I think things will turn out, honey," she told him.

Calleigh had a hard time leaving Darian for the first time. She checked and re-checked everything and kept hold of his hand while Susie held him and expelled Calleigh's fears.

"He'll be fine, Calleigh. Go."

"Okay, I've got my cell if anything happens…"

"Nothing will happen," Susie shook her head.

"…Just in case something does."

"Yes, yes, now go." She shooed Calleigh out.

"Okay," Calleigh surrendered, "I'm going." She kissed her son, "Bye sweetheart, Mommy loves you and I'll see you later."

She struggled for a moment at the door, wavering, but once she was in the hallway, Susie wasn't going to open the door for her. It was hard, but she had to learn to trust that other people could and would take good care of Darian. It was good for him.

Calleigh climbed on the bus that was heading towards the Crime Lab.

There were a few already available seats this time and she picked one near the window.

Comfortably seated, she smiled at Susie's comment about her attire when she dropped Darian off.

Susie's expression was one of astonishment, "Are you trying to give Horatio a heart attack?"

"It may be one of my intentions," Calleigh gave her a coy look.

She would have worn a skirt if she could have to show some leg, but it wasn't very appropriate in her line of work, she knew, and she felt more comfortable firing a gun in pants.

What she had chosen to wear was partly for her because, black - as she thought - was thinning and she was still beleaguered with her weight gain. She wore her very high leather boots, perfectly fitting black pants and a snug fitting black blouse opened at the collar, knowing all of this would be enough to make him undress her with his eyes. She had lifted her hair up into a soft bun to reveal her neck and wore the pearl drop earrings Horatio had given her on their honeymoon. Smokey eyes and muted red lips completed the picture.

"May I?"

Calleigh was startled and turned to the source of her surprise. Kyson was standing beside her seat.

Her lips blossomed into a smile, "Sure." She picked up her purse and placed it in her lap to give him room to sit with her.

"Is this going to become a regular thing?"

"What's that?"

"Us meeting in the bus?"

Calleigh laughed, "No, I'll have my Jeep back soon and I won't be taking the bus anymore."

"Ah. I see."

"I realize I didn't call you –"

"It's okay. You don't have to explain yourself to me. Your husband probably isn't too thrilled with the idea, anyway."

"No, he is. I mean, he'd love to meet you. We're just, ah, going through some things right now."

"I hope it's nothing serious. He sounds like a great guy."

"He is."

"You deserve nothing less, Calleigh."

She touched his arm, "Thank you. That's really sweet."

"You look stunning, by the way."

Calleigh chuckled, "Thanks. I was told as much." She glanced at him, "you look nice too."

Kyson laughed, "Well, it's not my usual suit and tie… I'm going to help out at a shelter. Hence, the tee shirt and jeans."

"You have time to do that?"

"I, uh, work strange hours."

"Oh." She looked at him again, "Well, I think it's great that you do that with your free time." Smiling she said, "Kyson Mackenzie, always serving the community. Here or back in Darnell."

He shrugged, "I love it and it's very rewarding. Specially when I get to ride the bus with such a beautiful woman."

Calleigh blushed, "Stop that," she swatted his arm, "you're making me blush."

"Some things never change."

"Mmm," she glanced down at her purse and caught sight of the wedding ring on her finger, "others do."

Kyson nodded, "Right."

"What does he do, your husband?"

"He's a crime scene investigator at MDPD. He's actually my boss."

"You're a CSI?"

"Mmm hmm. And, why does that surprise you so much?"

"It doesn't, really, I knew you were going to end up doing something great in New Orleans. You ran away from a life that wasn't for you."

"You're right… I never felt it was mine to begin with." Calleigh looked ahead, "Well, this is my stop."

Kyson got up and held out his hand to help her up, "Until we meet again."

Calleigh smiled, "Yes."

"Take care."

"You too. And, I'll call you, I will. Bye." She stepped out onto the curb and reached for her cell phone in her purse. Flipping through her contacts, she pressed a number in the list.

The person on the other line picked up on the second ring.

"Hey, Susie. It's me. How's Darian?"

Horatio was looking out the window in interrogation suite 2, away from the suspect he knew in his gut to be the killer, when he saw Calleigh walking down the street towards the building. He lost his trail of thought, getting slightly distracted by her. She looked absolutely gorgeous and, if the ring on his finger didn't remind him that he was married to her, he'd think he was completely out of her league and that he'd never get anything as much as a glance of recognition from her.

He smiled for a moment seeing her perfectly now, walking down the pathway leading to the entrance. All radiance, she was.

Eric, who was also in the room with Horatio, was used to his boss' pauses and diverse interrogating methods, but he was taking longer than usual to get back to intimidating the suspect.

Just when Eric was going to intervene, Horatio turned, hands on his hips. The smile he wore became somewhat wicked, eyes piercing like knives.

Eric's worries were dissipated. They had the guy. Horatio would nail him right then and there.

Calleigh walked in CSI focused on going straight down the hall in the direction of Horatio's office.

Just as she reached the top of the stairs, Horatio entered the elevator on a higher floor going down to the reception area.

Calleigh sauntered to Horatio's office door and peered inside.

Nobody there.

She figured he was out in the field again and took the elevator back down to the first floor.

Horatio stood at the reception desk, "Claudia, have you seen Calleigh?"

"I saw her yesterday, if that's what you mean. Haven't seen her today, no, but I have been pretty busy taking calls and such."

The phone rang and she smiled at the relentless machine, having to excuse herself to pick up. "Excuse me, Lieutenant."

Horatio nodded. "Okay, thank you."

He walked down the hall and decided to climb the stairs up to his office – maybe she was waiting for him there.

The elevator doors slid open, and Claudia busy writing something down, didn't see Calleigh rush out and make her way to the labs.

Horatio reached his office and discovered that she wasn't there either.

He stood silently before the door to his office. It only took a fraction of a second for him to know where she'd be headed…

The Gun Lab.

And, briskly walking back to the stairs, that's where he was headed as well.

TBC…