Gentle
By
Scoutfan22
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Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans. DC comic does, not me
Summary: Raven falls in love with Cyborg.
Pairing: Cyborg/Raven
Notes: I'm a big Raven/Starfire fan, but I like this paring too. I think in all wackiness Cyborg and Raven would make a good couple. This fic was kind of inspired by a conversation between me and my boyfriend, so thank you Ben. Oh. And by the way, Raven looks so awesome with long hair! Anybody who saw the episode where she kicked Trigon's butt knows what I mean!
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His hands aren't anything to brag about.
The only thing is that they'd crush your arm into a powder if you weren't careful.
I know he tries not to though. The way he touches you, even it's just a tap on the shoulder, tells you that he's trying to be gentle.
Maybe that's why I felt different towards him in the first place. Maybe that's why one day I realized I loved him.
It was an ordinary day, as ordinary as it can be when you're a teen titan. Beast Boy and Robin were playing video games, and Starfire was attempting to use a computer. That was kind of funny, considering she had it upside down and was trying to plug it into the telephone line.
"Curse this earth technology!" she howled as the computer failed to boot up.
I was sitting and reading Shakespeare (Hamlet, if you want to know). Reading usually helps me focus my emotions, but somehow my emotions weren't as focused as they usually were. When Cyborg walked into the room, my heart jumped. Huh? I quickly composed myself and tried to go back to reading…
…but found my attention wandering to where Cyborg was helping Starfire with the computer.
Any normal human would be frustrated within ten seconds and leave Star to fend for herself.
But there was Cyborg, helping her calmly and patiently. Don't get me wrong, Cyborg can have a really bad temper, but at the moment he was quite civil.
As I watched, I could feel emotions that I usually kept at bay turning within me violently. I could feel my powers coming to the surface, but I couldn't tear my eyes away. Moment by moment, I studied him.
I wondered what he looked like before his accident, and found myself graced with a vision of a tall, muscular and handsome young man. His skin was a rich light chocolate color, and when he turned I was surprised to see kind and compassionate misty-grey eyes. I could almost feel myself melting under the intense gaze…
"Uh, Raven?"
Beast Boy's voice knocked out of my reverie, and I was surprised to see that I was above everyone's heads. Uh oh. While I was watching Cyborg, my powers had reacted to my emotions and made me levitate.
I came down quickly and pulled my cloak over my head.
Before anyone –especially Cyborg- asked what was wrong I teleported to my room.
I slumped against the wall and put my hand to my chest, trying to stop my heart from pounding so hard. Oh no. Oh no. This is not good.
I knew it then and there.
I was in love with Cyborg.
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That night, as I slept, I had a dream.
It was Cyborg again in his human form. Oh, he looked so handsome. He was in a red silk shirt that was a little tight (even though it showed off his muscles, so I really couldn't complain) a black blazer and black slacks. "Hello Raven." He said softly. "I've been waiting for you."
I looked down and realized I was wearing a purple satin dress. There was a sheer gauzy shawl around my bare shoulders, and I felt my cheeks warm. Wait… "You were waiting for me?"
He smiled, and I felt my knees buckle. We stood there for the longest time, just watching each other. Finally he stepped up to me and touched my face.
"You're very beautiful, Raven."
"I… Um… thank you Cyborg."
"Call me Victor." He said, smiling again. He put a hand on my shoulder, and I could feel the heat through the wrap. He pushed it away and traced his palm over my skin. Oh god, I hadn't realized I was trembling!
"Cy…C-Cyborg—"
"Victor ." he corrected as his fingers traced down my arm.
"R-right. Victor, I have to control my emotions or else… well, bad things happen." I said as easily as I could manage. It was getting harder to concentrate with him now running both hands over my skin.
"Raven, sometimes you have to let yourself go. Sometimes you have to live with the moment and whatever feelings you have in you." He murmured as he slipped his hand under one of the straps of my dress and pulled it down.
Oh by Azarath. I gulped audibly and bit back a moan at the same time as he slipped the other strap off. "I… I've never seen this side of you before, Cy—Victor."
"You bring this side out of me, Raven. That is your real name, right?"
At that moment he could've called me anything and I wouldn't have cared, but I nodded. "Raven Azea."
"Azea," he whispered in my ear as he pulled me close to him and reached for the zip on the back of my dress. "I like it. What does it mean?"
At that exact moment he began to unzip the dress, so all I could do was gasp quickly, "It means dove. There are a lot of them on my planet."
He didn't take the dress off just yet. He simply looked into my eyes and smiled. "Raven Dove. It works." I realized that somehow (this was a dream, so I wasn't entirely sure how things were happening) he had lost the blazer and his shirt, so I could see the muscles of his perfectly sculpted torso. Oh god.
"Raven. You know that this isn't how I look in real life." He said, those misty-grey eyes staring into mine. "Can you see past my looks? Can you see past the machine and perceive what you see now?"
"Yes." I breathed out slowly and he let the dress fall in a pool of satin at my feet.
He pulled me to him again, and my bare chest brushed against his. We both groaned at the contact.
"C… can I touch you?" I asked him. He nodded and I placed my hands on his chest. He shivered as I slid my hands over his skin reverently. "Oh Raven…" he moaned. "you feel so good."
I was in a state of euphoria. No one, even my own my mother, let me get close to them like this. Most were put off by the whole "I'm an evil gothic chick who doesn't like anybody, stay away from me or I'll will hurt you" attitude I had put around myself. Yet here was someone who was letting me get close to him. Even real life Cyborg (Victor) had always been nice to me, had let me get close up to him.
"I hope I never wake up." I said as I put my arms around his neck and my head on his chest.
"You will Raven." He said as he kissed the top of my head. "but when you do, will you be able to look me in the eye? If we do something, will you be able to love me in real life?"
I looked up. "What?"
"Raven, if we make love in this dream, would you be able to make love to me in real life?" he said, his warm breath on my face.
I bit my lip. Would I? "I… I don't know Victor. I… I have to keep my emotions to myself."
"So you don't love me? You don't want this?" he asked me. There was a hurt tone in his voice. "you wouldn't be able to love me? But you said you would, Raven."
"Victor… I…" if I said I loved him, then I'd have to tell him when I woke up, otherwise I wouldn't be able to live with myself. But if I told him, my emotions could go haywire. What if they did that in a fight, and somebody got hurt?
Or worse…
What if Victor got hurt? I'd never be able to forgive myself.
"Raven?"
I looked back up into his beautiful eyes. All right, he wanted the truth; I'd give him the truth. "Yes. Yes, I would love you in real life."
"No matter what your emotions would do?" he queried.
I threw all my reservations out the window. "Yes."
He smiled, and just before he kissed me, he murmured, "I thought you'd say that."
Everything else after that moment is too dear and intimate to my heart that I dare not share them. All I can say is that it was the most beautiful and passionate dream I've ever had.
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"Azarath Metrion Zinthos!" I howled, feeling my powers explode from my hands and flinging the oil barrels at Slade's ninjas. It knocked several of them over and I allowed myself a small grin.
There was a loud blast, and I turned to see Cyborg using his sonic cannon against a few as well. I had kept my promise; I could look Cyborg in the eye.
I just hadn't worked up enough courage to tell him how I felt just yet.
Robin had Slade cornered, and we surrounded the two of them, trying to be sure Slade had no way out.
"You're caught Slade. There's no way out of this one." the boy wonder snarled.
If Slade's masked face could've grinned, it would have been an evil grin. "Oh Robin, you silly boy. You've said this before, and what's happened?" the eyes narrowed, and it was at that moment I caught the detonator in his hand.
Before I could call out a warning, Slade triggered the bomb and blasted us all backwards. I hit a wall and rolled onto the ground; groaning as I sat up and shook my head.
"Raven, look out!"
The only thing I saw was Cyborg's huge form hurtling towards me. "No!" I screamed.
The heavy metal rafter crashed down onto him and the machine parts of his body flickered violently. While Starfire, Robin and Beast Boy charged after Slade, I moved to Cyborg's side, using my powers to move the rafter off of him. I cradled his head in my lap as he coughed weakly, a stream of motor oil and blood trickling out the corner of his mouth.
"Cyborg… why?" I said, barely able to control the shaking in my voice. I could feel my powers and my emotions bubbling to the surface. A tear fell onto his face. Oh, I didn't know I was crying...
"People always do crazy things…" he croaked, one grey and one fiber-optic red eye gazing deep into mine, "…when they're in love."
"Oh Victor…" I murmured brokenly, unaware that I had used his real name.
"I love you… Raven Azea."
I suddenly realized he had the same dream I had. Could I…?
I bit my lip and brought my face to his. "I love you too, Victor, with all of my heart."
He smiled sweetly and coughed again. "I…"
Then he didn't say anything more. His Cyborg parts flickered one last time, and then they died.
"Victor?" I asked quietly. "Victor?"
When he didn't move, I threw myself upon him and sobbed, numerous objects flying up and around me and crashing into the wall. "Why?" I asked to no one, even though the other titans had gathered around us. "Why?" I said again, even louder this time.
From what I understand, they had to pry me away from his body.
I don't remember the funeral or anything much after that.
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'So I'm sitting here in the Watchtower's mental wing. They brought me here because I've been in a deep depression, and they want J'onn to take a look at me.
My dreams are filled with the sight of Victor's dead corpse lying in my lap. Gone is the loving and gentle Victor of my dreams. All that's left is his cold and lifeless form...'
"Ah, I see you've been making progress."
I look to see Wonder Woman, a.k.a. Diana standing there. "Does writing about it help?" she asks as she sits on the couch beside me. I nod and bite my lip as the tears threaten to spill form my eyes. I place the journal on the coffee table.
"How have your sessions with J'onn been going?"
"As well as to be expected. He says I can go back soon."
"That's good." Her blue eyes smile kindly at me. "You don't call it home?"
I turn and look out the window at the glowing green and blue sphere of Earth. "Home would be where he is. He's not there, so it's not home." I swallow audibly and then sigh. "Diana, do you believe in true love?"
"As a matter of fact, I do." She says, looking down at the gold ring on her hand.
"Ah so Bruce finally proposed, did he?" I say with a slight chuckle in my voice. She nods, and then looks at me as if to continue.
"The funny thing is, I didn't believe in it, until Victor came along. He said to me that sometimes you have to let yourself go. Sometimes you have to live with the moment and whatever feelings you have in you. I guess that's true when it comes to love."
She smiles again and reaches over; placing a hand on my leg. "It's true with everything," she chuckled. "Do you want to come eat dinner with Shayera and me?"
After a moment I give her one of my rare smiles. "Sure."
As I stand up, I pick up the journal and hold it close to my heart. As Diana and I walk, I remember the poem I have written on the last page:
'Gentle of hand and kind of touch
Gentle was the one that I loved so much.
As I write these words
I am reminded of the kind and sweet side
No one but me saw.
In my dreams he was tender
And in life he was too.
I was in love
And I could look past his appearance.
I saw his human side
And was embraced by his warmth.
I was in love
With the gentlest soul on earth.'
"I love you too… Victor… with all of my heart…"
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End
7/22/2005 10:43 PM