Once Upon a Razorblade

Disclaimer: I own no part of Yu Yu Hakusho.

Part Two: Sweetest Lullaby

Chapter Three: Yes

-

I'm tired. Not just mentally. Physically, too.

My head pounds and I simply want to sleep.

Or do something else, but as I well know, it's nigh on impossible to do anything under the watch of the nurse assigned to me. The lock on my bathroom door was even dismantled, just in case I tried anything.

I'm going to be in the hospital for another day, and then I will be sent home, transferred to the guard of a school psychiatrist.

Joy.

I shift a bit, not quite comfortable in this bed for some strange reason, though it could very well be the presence of an unfamiliar person in my room - the nurse who is supposed to watch over me, but who has now been lulled to sleep by the wonderful scent that rises above the almost unbearable stench of the hospital.

The scent of roses.

It's quite amazing that I was even able to cultivate them properly. I have the sneaking suspicion that when Genkai came to visit, she somehow put a limit on the energy that I am able to expend.

Sly old hag. Though I doubt she knows the extent to which my knowledge of plants (and therefore plant poisons) reaches, she probably realizes that I could easily summon a plant with enough harmful properties to make it seem like an accident.

Ah, well.

I suddenly become aware of yet another presence in the room; one that I am very well acquainted with.

"Hiei," I whisper so that the nurse does not awaken.

"Hn," is all that he mutters as he leans against the door.

"Come to lecture me?" I ask, almost cheerful.

"Idiot. Why should I waste my time? I know you, fox. You're too stubborn to see it any other way than your own."

I smile thinly.

"And you, Hiei? Do you listen to what others advise?"

"Hn. I value my independence, Kurama."

I raise an eyebrow.

"Exactly how is that relevant?"

Hiei snorts, though not loud enough to wake the sleeping woman in my room.

"I would rather not depend on any other fool to advise me when I know exactly what I should do."

Which is why you - we, actually - work for Koenma, isn't it, Hiei?

I have always wondered on that. No matter what, Hiei always comes back to us, even if it is only at the very end - always. Strange. Mayhap he finds himself inescapably entangled in this fate as one of Koenma's lackeys - as much as it pains me to think I am, in truth, one of these "lackeys". Indeed, that youko portion of my brain is screaming out its enragement.

I suddenly wonder if Hiei has run into Yuusuke and the others yet, and if so, I wonder if they told him about my sickness. I'm not sure why I'm so eager to get this out into the air, but I am. It gives me something think about, perhaps. I have no idea.

I am beginning to think that another symptom of this sickness is a loss of a previously expansive attention span.

"Why are you still here?"

I snap out of my thoughts.

"I attempted su-"

Hiei looks at me in irritated annoyance.

"You are no longer weak. Why are you still here?" he repeats.

I sigh, smile, and turn my head to look out the window and stare out at the moon that shines so brightly in all its luminescent glory.

"Because."

Hiei waits. I can practically hear him roll his eyes.

"I am going to die."

He snorts.

"What, did it only just occur to you that humans die eventually?" he asks snidely, in regular Hiei fashion.

I don't feel like rising to the bait that he sets out, though I may have if I hadn't been in this damn uncomfortable bed, watching the moon in all its tarnished beauty with the scent of roses only barely covering up the wretched smell of the hospital.

"I know my soul would probably not be able to take another journey into another body, and a permanent transformation into Youko would be no good. I'm tired of running away from death like a 'frightened mouse', as you once said."

I turn back to Hiei, who looks impassive as ever, though his eyes seem to portray only the mildest of emotions: disbelief. Ah. I cannot blame him, either.

"Oh, please, fox. As if you would die so easily."

And then he's gone.

"Shuuichi, are you all right?" the nurse asks groggily.

"Yes," I reply.

Yes...

-

Author's Space

At last! Hiei interaction! Yeah, I know, I know.

"Hold nothing. If you meet Buddha, kill him. If you meet the patriarchs, kill them. Free of all, bound by nothing, you live your life simply as it is." -Koumyou Sanzo/Genjyo Sanzo, Gensomaden Saiyuki, Kazuya Minekura. That's what gets me into a sort of Hiei mindset.

Written when I was so tired my eyes stung. At least I did it, okay?

Soundtrack: Eh... Oddly enough, I'll Meet You There, Simple Plan, No Pads, No Helmets... Just Balls.

Next Chapter: Chapter Four: Childhood

Review or flame, critique, rant... Long reviews are adored beyond belief.

Thank You / Review Responses

samuraiduck27

Niana Kuonji

ineXpressible - Thanks. I really like Shizuru as a character because she's got the potential to be used in ways that can help or build up the plot. And because she's got a really complex personality.

Silverlie - YEAH! ...Sorry. Your review really made me laugh.

Kodaijin Hiei

Kuranga108 - You flatter me with the highest forms of complement! I love all the characters in Yu Yu Hakusho, but I'm not always sure that I portray them the right way, so I'm really thankful when I get reviews like yours!

Kyoka

Adilande - ...I love you. Well, I mean, it's my ego that loves you, but... Really. You know how to flatter a person. Thanks so much.