Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. That privelige belongs to JK Rowling. Hooray!
Notes: This fic has been published to make me and my friends smile. I wrote it a long, long time ago, back when OotP was new and I hadn't even met someone else called Michelle. As you will tell, I used to have a funny idea about shipping. Now I'm staunch R/Hr, and have been for at least a year and a half!
Hermione Granger was visiting Edinburgh with her parents, and had already been there for a week. Her Muggle friend Michelle was also there with her, they had kept in contact even though Hermione went to a different school, Hermione never said she was a witch.
Today they were going on a helicopter flight over the Scottish Mountains, their pilot was called Oliver. Oliver was a young man with sandy hair and a boyish grin, he grinned at the two girls and opened the door of the chopper.
"Alright, Mr and Mrs Granger, you have those seats on that side, girls, you sit on the other side," Oliver had an Irish accent, which Hermione swore she recognised. Oliver shut the door and climbed into the cockpit, he started the rotor blades and then they rose into the air.
Once they had reached a steady height they headed North, over the mountains, Oliver giving a commentary. After about an hour they were flying relatively low over a forest.
"Now up ahead is a ruined castle, it has been there for a long time, and the National Trust has declared it unsafe. However we can fly over the, oh s---!"
The engine of the helicopter spluttered. Hermione, who had been looking out of the window and only seeing a familiar looking castle, swore under her breath. Hogwarts!
Suddenly the engine died, and the blades stopped spinning. Due to momentum the chopper kept moving forwards, but it also tilted down, on a direct course with the castle roof.
Hermione realised that they would've lost contact with the helicopter's base, and that Oliver would not be able to talk to them. Michelle screamed, as the copter crashed through the roof, wood splintering everything. The helicopter jammed into the roof, with the girls' side closer to the floor than Hermiones' parents' side. This meant that although Michelle could suddenly see into the great hall of Hogwarts, Mr and Mrs Granger still thought that they were floating in the air.
"Why have we stopped?" asked Mr. Granger, worridly.
"Er, okay everyone" said Hermione, "this, er, this is my school."
Michelle, who was looking out of the window at three men and two women wearing robes running about in panic beneath them, gasped as one shot a coloured light out of a stick at them.
Suddenly the wall of the cockpit collapsed and Oliver came through. He had not removed his helmet, but he had a wand in his hand,
"Hermione, are you alright?"
Still wondering where she had heard that Irish accent, and marvelling that Oliver knew her, she nodded.
"Yeah, I think Dumbledore's trying to get us out of here."
Oliver was a wizard, it was safe to talk about magic and Dumbledore to him. Oliver breathed a sigh of relief. Then he looked through the lower windows and saw the professors at work.
A silvery light also came from the man who had black hair, and Oliver laughed,
"Wonder what Snape'd say if he knew he'd saved two Gryffindors?"
"You'll soon find out," said Hermione, as McGonagall also shot the silvery light up to the copter.
"Wow!" gasped Michelle, looking down at herself, they were all glowing with the odd silver light, Hermione allowed herself to relax, and her mind seemed to slip down into the mind of professor McGonagall, she could see what the professor was seeing, and hear what she heard.
"Locomotor helicopter!" squeaked professor Flitwick, his bright light joining the others.
"Wow!" thought Hermione.
"Miss Granger?" said her head of house out loud, Hermione lost concentration and was jerked back up to her own mind.
Oliver was looking very calm, his eyes were closed, Michelle spoke to Hermione.
"Where is this place?"
"This is my school, Michelle. The guy with the white hair and beard is the Headmaster, Professor Dumbledore.
"It all sounds so very old fashioned," replied Michelle. "Who's the guy with the long black hair? He looks cute."
Hermione snorted, Snape, cute?
"That is Professor Snape, he teaches potions, which is like Chemistry. He is head of Slytherin house, I'm in Gryffindor and the woman with grey hair is my head of house."
"Who are the other two?" asked Michelle, as the fifth teacher sent up her beam of light.
"Flitwick, who teaches, uh, charms, is the tiny one with the violet robes. Sprout is the other woman, head of Hufflepuff and Herbology teacher."
"Is charms like deportment? Your school really is old fashioned."
"Nah! Oh this is hard to explain."
"Might as well explain, Hermione, I've just been talking to Dumbledore."
"All right then, Oliver and I, well, we are a witch and wizard. We can do magic. This is a school of magic. I can't show you any magic because it's the holidays."
"I'll show them some Transfig."
"That's what McGonagall teaches, by the way," said Hermione to Michelle.
"Right," Oliver pointed his wand at the light. "Transfiguro!" the light turned into an inkwell. Hermione grinned and delved into her pockets for a quill and parchment.
From down below Dumbledore yelled something, and the helicopter gave a jerk. Hermione fell into Oliver, who caught her about the waist, and then they slumped to the ground. For some reason Hermione did not mind being in Oliver's arms and did not struggle.
As they looked out of the window they drifted slowly to the ground, and Hermione scrambled upright. Once they had landed, Oliver removed his helmet. He was, in fact, Oliver Wood!
They clambered out of the chopper, Hermione and Oliver chatting.
"I doubt you heard much about what Umbridge did to the school last year."
"Oh, I popped into Fred and George's shop. They told me a lot."
Hermione grinned, "Yeah, well you'll know that Ron's now keeper?"
"Yeah, I heard Ginny made a great Seeker as well, grabbing the Snitch from right under Chang's nose!"
"Hello Professors," said Hermione.
"Good morning Miss Granger, Mr Wood. Mr and Mrs Granger, and…?"
"This is my Muggle friend Michelle Edwards, Professor McGonagall."
"I see," said McGonagall, pursing her lips, "You'll probably have to stay at Hogwarts for the rest of the holidays, and you Wood.
Obviously I must have meant to continue this fic. Thank your lucky stars I didn't! Please review! Sporks welcome, and please please send me the link. I know the grammar is terrible - this is in its original format save that it's typed. I promise I have dramatically improved - I kept wanting to correct this all the way through!