Disclaimer: I Do Not Own Charmed
A/N: THANK GAWD FOR MICROSOFT WORD: sings victory song : I can finally type without having to constantly look at the screen to see if things are going alright. I can leave it all to the end. Plus I think typing on a weird system "WordPad" didn't help the writers block. I can't wait for my first red squiggly line to appear under a misspelled word.
This chapter is written to Ashlee Simpson's Pieces Of Me.
Vulnerable Child – Chapter 7
On a Monday I am waiting,
By Tuesday I am fading,
And by Wednesday I can't sleep,
Then the phone rings I can hear you,
And the darkness is a clear view,
Cause you've come to rescue me…
Phoebe and Piper stood inches apart in the small Halliwell bathroom, Piper moved her hand a quickly wiped a tear that had fallen softly from her eye. Phoebe stood not moving, speaking, or breathing. Her eyes focused on the test which Piper held in her hand, slowly she felt her body falling to the ground.
"Phoebe…" gasped Piper as she caught her sister by the arm, easing her to the floor quietly. "Phoebe, please say something," Phoebe said nothing, didn't even murmur. Piper threw the pregnancy test to the ground as she sat next to her sister. She placed an arm round Phoebe's shoulder supportively, waiting for her to speak. Whilst silently wondering how her little sister was going to cope now, she was someone's mother. Everything was about to change.
Fall, with you I fall so fast,
I can hardly catch my breath,
I hope this lasts.
The minutes slowly ticked past, and still Phoebe didn't speak. It was like she was in some kind of trance, she was still aware of what was happening but couldn't do anything. Piper's eyes darted quickly towards the clock; it read 6:05pm. Grams would be serving dinner soon, a family dinner, with questions and concerns. All about Phoebe, all aimed at her, and all needing an answer. An answer she had, but didn't want.
"Phoebe, we need to leave the bathroom… come on. You have to stand up. Please." Said Piper as she took Phoebe once more by the arm. Phoebe limp body fought against her, but she persisted and soon lifted Phoebe to her feet. She coached her out of the bathroom and they walked slowly along the corridor to Piper's bedroom,
"Phoebe everything is going to be alright, I promise," said Piper as she ushered her sister inside, she gently stroked Phoebe's hair as she walked, praying that Phoebe would speak. Even hoping that she would argue that things were screwed up – she knew they were, she just couldn't admit it. She had to be strong, for Phoebe. Time slowly passed and soon Piper heard Grams calling them, she knew it was dinner time, although it felt more like an execution. She began to stand up but felt Phoebe pulling on her arm, she looked down at her little sister whose eye's called out to her in desperation. Tears beginning to form at the corners of her eyes as she pleaded with Piper without saying a word. Piper rested her hand gently on Phoebe's head and stroked her hair, like she had done when Phoebe was younger to comfort her.
"It's okay," She said quietly, as she took Phoebe's hand and led her slowly out of the room.
Seems like I can finally rest my head,
On something real,
I like the way that feels,
It's as if you know me better,
Than I ever know myself,
I love how you can tell,
All the pieces of me…
Piper and Phoebe arrived down stairs ten minutes later, with Piper having to convince Phoebe not to run and hide repeatedly. They arrived at the dining room door and saw Grams and Prue already sitting at the table, Phoebe's eyes were bloodshot and widened when she set eyes on the rest of her family. She could tell they were going to be so disappointed in her.
"Phoebe, what's the matter?" asked Grams, "Are you alright," Phoebe nodded her head, and sat down as calmly as she could. Piper sat opposite Phoebe, and smiled as she did so – to try and convince them nothing was wrong. Within minutes everyone lifted their forks and began to eat, everyone but Phoebe. She sat and stared at the food, it seemed wrong to eat.
"Aren't you hungry?" asked Prue, as she nudged Phoebe's elbow. Phoebe shook her head, keeping her face down. She felt tears coming but was determined to fight them off. Prue looked over at Piper, but Piper avoided her gaze looking intently down at her food as though it was the most important thing in the world to her. Prue glanced at Grams, who signalled to her to eat. The meal was eaten in silence, which was unusual in the Halliwell house, there were awkward glances, the clanging of cutlery to plates, the ticking of the grandfather clock merely a few feet away from them but no words.
I am moody, I am messy,
I get restless and I'm senseless,
And you never seem to care,
When I'm angry,
You listen,
Make me happy in submission,
And you won't stop till I'm there…
Phoebe and Piper stood in the kitchen, washing dishes silently. Phoebe hadn't uttered a word since taking the test. Piper wanted to help her, but how could she help someone if they wouldn't even speak. Phoebe washes dished methodically, it were as though she were a CD stuck on repeat, into the soapy water, wipe with the cloth, hand to Piper for drying. With every plate, knife, fork and spoon. Everything was the same. Soon there were no more dishes, as Phoebe pulled the plug in the sing she watched as the water slowly drained out swirling round and round. It was as though it was hypnotising her. Piper took Phoebe's hand and squeezed it supportively, she walked her to the kitchen table and sat down.
"Phoebe," she said, and waited for an answer. Minutes slowly ticked by as Phoebe just looked straight ahead. "Phoebe!" said Piper in a stern tone, "Look don't fall apart here Phoebe, you can't fall apart," Piper knew she was being harsh she just hoped that Phoebe would yell at her or argue with her, something. "You have to be strong, and you have to tell Grams." Phoebe's face darted to face Piper's, her eyes beginning to tear once more. "Phoebe don't just stare at me. You know you have to tell her… if you don't… I will." Replied Piper, secretly she knew she never would. She wouldn't betray Phoebe's confidence like that but she hoped Phoebe didn't know this. Phoebe lifted her hand up and wiped away a tear that had fallen, slowly her eyes looked towards the patterned table cloth.
"I'm sorry," she muttered quietly, "I'm so sorry," Piper breathed a sigh of relief when she heard Phoebe speak; she placed her arm around her shoulders and pulled her close.
"I know you're sorry, I am too. This shouldn't have happened to you, but we just have to deal with it. It's going to be alright," she said supportively.
"How? How is it going to be alright? Everything is so screwed up now. I can't be like this… I can't be a…" she paused,
"What? You can't be what?" asked Piper, already knowing the answer.
"A mother,"
Fall, sometimes I fall so fast,
When I hit that bottom crash,
You're all I have.
Seems like I can finally rest my head,
On something real,
I like the way that feels,
Its as if you know me better,
Than I ever know myself,
I love how you can tell,
All the pieces of me…
Time passed slowly, and the conversation that Piper had started had ended. Phoebe had fallen into an uneasy sleep at the kitchen table, resting gently against Piper. Her eyes glance towards the clock, it was coming up on eight 'o'clock, they had been there over an hour. Piper glanced round to see Prue standing in the doorway; she walked over quietly and sat down next to Piper. Her eyes looked inquisitive, and Piper knew just what was coming. Her only problem was that Prue always knew how to get information from her younger – weaker – sister. How could she keep Phoebe's secret to herself?
"Piper," said Prue as she looked directly at her,
"Yeah," said Piper trying to sound casual, she glanced to the clock again, how long was this going to last. She looked back at Prue, and tried to act natural.
"What's going on?" asked Prue,
"Nothi…"
"Bullshit," said Prue before Piper could even finish speaking. Piper looked to Phoebe, and back to Prue. "I know something's going on. Its obvious, and I know its between you and Phoebe but I want to know. You're going to tell me,"
"There's really nothing…" she said, her voice growing quieter and quieter by each word.
"Yes there is, and I'm going to find out. You might as well just tell me now, save everyone the trouble."
"I can't." Replied Piper, hoping Prue would stop asking.
"So there is something going on," smirked Prue, slowly she took hold of Piper's free hand and began stroking it gently, "Since when did we keep secrets in this family… we don't. I don't want to start, Piper you know you can trust me. Don't you?"
"No," replied Piper,
"Pardon? You can't trust me?" said Prue, shocked at how forth coming Piper was,
"Not with this…" she replied, as she pulled her hand slowly away from Prue.
How do you know?
Everything I'm about to say,
Am I that obvious?
And if it's written on my face,
I hope it never goes away,
On a Monday I am waiting,
And by Tuesday I am fading,
Into your arms so I can breathe.