A/N: Due to popular demand, I am back with Lily's POV. Sorry for the long wait. I had writer's block but hopefully this is up to par with the first chapter. Have a go, tell me what you think. Oh, and if any part of Lily's list seems to offend you or you think is not true, please forgive me. This is just how I believe Lily would feel about herself.
Disclaimer: Three words. Four syllables. Eleven letters. I OWN NOTHING. Plain and simple.
Oh yeah…I want to dedicate this chapter to CrystalKisses. Her reviews are always encouraging and helpful. It is thanks to you that I shook off laziness and the fact that this chapter is up! So, CrystalKisses, this is for you!
Favorites
Hi, I am Lily Evans.
Oh, have you heard of me? I wouldn't doubt you. Nearly everyone has heard of me.
And frankly, I am sick and tired of it.
I am sick and tired of being the apple of everyone's eye, the star of the show, the limelight stealer, whatever you want to call it.
Every where I go, people are always saying "Hi, Lily!" or "Going to class? I'll come with you" or even "Will you go out with me, Lily?"
Wait, scratch that last one. Only James Potter says that. Who's James Potter you ask? Well, you will hear more about him later on. I have a whole section in this story dedicated to him.
------------
My best friend, Callie Williams, always says that I can be compared to a bag of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans. It is completely random with a mixture of potentially dangerous beans, sweet ones, tangy and sour ones, spicy/fiery ones, and some completely unreasonable ones. Though there is a chance of getting killed (or pummeled in my case), you can't help but want to take the risk.
Which I suppose is a compliment, in its own weird way.
Anyways, Callie just doesn't like the unreasonable beans in me.
I mean, there are various things about me that really bother her. One of those things is the fact that I express my feelings a lot.
In other words, I rant a lot to her about, well, anything. Usually, she just happens to be there when I get the urge to rant (just her luck) but right now, she isn't as she is in detention with McGonagall and I really want to vent.
So…
Will you stay?
Don't worry. I'll give you some time to make up your mind.
-
-
-
You've decided to stay?
Good.
I am my parents' favorite.
Okay, I have an older sister, Petunia, who has always had it out for me. Petunia is your average girl with brown hair and brown eyes (although Petunia insists she has very dirty blond hair and flashing hazel eyes). I think that is the main reason why she doesn't like me. Because she is average.
-
And I am far from average.
-
You don't believe me? I'll make a list.
1. I am the victim of an unusual name.
- I don't think you see many girls named Lily walking around your neighborhood. 2. My Christmas like appearance
- What sort of person has red hair and green eyes?
3. My height
- 5'7". All the pretty girls (Callie) are petite and delicate, like a rose. I, on the other hand, am tall and can be compared to a growing weed.
4. This list
- Who makes a list within a list?
------------
I think the one thing that really sets me apart is my personality. I am a very passionate individual, meaning I am not one to keep my feelings hidden. I go crazy over romance novels, argue and fight until I get my way, cry over the silliest things, and have an extremely short temper.
And this is what catches everyone's eyes.
Especially my parents'.
It's no secret that my parents prefer me over Petunia. You'd have to blind not to notice it. I mean sure, my parents love Petunia, but they dote over me.
I know it. And Petunia knows it.
-
My parents were all for being different. They loved adventures, surprises, anything out of the ordinary.
And as I said before, I am out of the ordinary.
So when we were little, Petunia always tried her hardest to outdo me by trying to be more different. But I always won. I never purposely tried to beat her; I just seem to be a natural at being wildly different.
If we were to make objects out of macaroni, she made a macaroni picture frame and I made a miniature macaroni Christmas tree.
If we were to make a cake, Petunia would make a square shaped chocolate cake and I made a raspberry and orange filled cake in the shape of the Eiffel Tower.
So, when I got my Hogwarts letter and Petunia didn't, it was quite natural for my parents to go crazy over me and Petunia to become completely jealous.
I think that letter was just one weird too many for her.
Oh well, she can't help it. She's not used to having so many odd things happen to her.
I am Professor Flitwick's favorite.
If you don't already know, Professor Flitwick is the Charms professor and he is such a nice man.
He would be even nicer if he didn't call on me all the time.
Just because I happen to be one of the top Charm students in our class and I happen to know the answers to the questions doesn't mean he should call on me all the time. There are plenty of other students who know the answer, why not give them a chance?
-
That wasn't a rhetorical question. I was actually asking you.
You don't know?
Neither do I. But I think it might be because of something that happened in first year.
If a Muggleborn at the age of eleven answered one question right in the first Charms class, does it necessarily mean that the said Muggleborn will know all the answers the every question asked? Couldn't it just mean that her horrible memory actually remembered something from the summer reading that she did?
Unlike Professor Flitwick. His memory is photographic. He remembers, to this day, the exact question that he asked and the word for word answer that I gave. With him, first impressions are everything. If you make a mistake with him, I can probably guarantee that he would remember it for the rest of his life.
Really, I hate being in the limelight. Once in a while, when you deserve it, is nice but twenty four/seven?
I am Douglas Burlingame's favorite person.
Uh, actually, I don't know who this person is. My good friend and dorm mate, Alana Sinclair, just told me that he had a major crush on me.
Well, in reality, she told me he was obsessed over me, but that's crazy. I mean, I know that I happen to be the favorite of many people but an obsession?
You have to draw the line somewhere.
I am the Slytherins' favorite person.
Before you go and have a heart attack, let me finish the sentence.
I am the Slytherins' favorite person to pick on.
You can all breathe now.
------------
The Slytherins' love to harass, bully and ridicule me to death. Actually, they would love for me to die in any way possible. It doesn't really matter to them; I don't think they are very picky.
But if we lived life worrying, where's the fun?
Besides, people like the Marauders (James Potter, Sirius Black, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew) are constantly looking out for me anyways.
You see, in their (their meaning the Slytherins', not the Marauders) opinion, Muggleborns are unfit to study magic. Since I am a Muggleborn, that would make me unfit to study magic. Technically.
I guess I see their point. I mean, they grew up knowing various spells and hexes that their parents performed; they knew that they were going here. I didn't know any of this existed until I got my letter and even then I was a little skeptical about it all. Hogwarts is all that witches and wizards have. For many years, Hogwarts was only magical folk and only recently, I believe, were Muggles allowed to come. I think that they consider it an invasion of privacy.
That's why I am nice to them. Because they aren't.
Confused?
The Slytherins' make me feel as if the whole world isn't clearing the path for me. Usually I feel as though people believe I can't do anything by myself because they are always following me everywhere. Like I need some sort of tour guide taking me everywhere. The Slytherins', particularly Severus Snape, are always insulting me and that is what makes me work hard. They made me who I am today: tough, ardent, and determined.
That is also why I am the top in our year at Defense Against the Dark Arts. Because that is the one subject that Snape, Malfoy, Lestrange, and all the others believe I can't and don't have the right to excel in.
To put this in a rather concise statement, it is due to the Slytherins' that made Lily Evans who she is.
But don't tell Callie that I said any of this. She would definitely freak out and would probably think that Lucius Malfoy and his cronies have brainwashed me.
I am James Potter's favorite person.
Ah, James Potter. Where to start? I could say how James is one of the sweetest and most determined person that you will ever meet in your lifetime but you probably already know that. He is a very popular and well-known guy.
Oh well, I'll just tell you anyway.
------------
Since I am a Muggleborn, I didn't know anything about Hogwarts. I got onto the platform with help from Remus Lupin but when I got onto the train, I didn't know what I was supposed to do. I found an empty compartment and started looking through all the books I bought in order to learn anything I could about the school. About thirty minutes into the train ride, I gave up and, being the extremely passionate person I am, started to cry when James Potter stumbled in. He quickly found out that I didn't know any magic and started to explain everything, and I mean everything, to me. He told me about the different houses, teachers that were there (apparently his sister Clarissa told him) and the classes that we would be taking. He behaved like an extreme gentleman.
Needless to say, I left the train a much more confident person.
And, of course, with green hair.
James told me that I had to have green hair to be Sorted. So, when I went up to get Sorted, everyone laughed at me.
Having people laugh at me for the first time in my life, that too when I was eleven, hurt.
It really hurt. In fact, it hurt so bad, it stung.
So I took it out in the only way I knew how.
Shouting.
And at who else but the wonderful James Potter?
But even that didn't solve anything. Shouting might have helped at the time but it didn't really help me forget what happened. So, I became a little more reserved. I didn't want to draw attention to myself; I didn't want some stupid nickname like the Green Gryffindor Girl so I held the zealous side of me for only my closest friends.
------------
He kept watching me after that.
I went to class. He followed.
I did my homework. He watched.
I answered questions in class. He stared a hole into the back of my head.
I don't know what was going through that boy's head. I mean, first he tricks me and then he stalks me? What next, pranking?
------------
In the middle of first year, he started pranking me.
I didn't understand it. I didn't even do anything to him. I was perfectly polite to him and never said anything mean about him. So I just ignored him.
And for a few days, I managed to do that.
Then, one day, while I was working on my Transfiguration essay, he did something that broke my patience.
He erased my essay.
All of it.
As I said before, I have an extremely short temper. It was a miracle that I managed to keep it in check that long.
I took a deep breath, rolled the parchment and tucked it into my robes, and walked straight over to where he and his friends were sitting.
And then it began.
"WHAT is the MATTER with you! Do you ENJOY doing this to people? I worked forever on that and you…you just…with your wand…all of it gone…can't believe it…I can't even SAY one sentence!"
"That's because you know that I am better than you." He replied simply.
"AT WHAT?" I screamed. I lunged at him with my hands but Callie and Alana held me back.
"You mark my words Potter," I said in a whisper "sooner or later, you'll be sorry."
He didn't look scared or terrified at my statement. You know what he did? He just grinned and stared at me with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.
"Sorry Evans." He said cheerfully and walked away.
I thought I would never understand that boy.
------------
That was my first impression of James Potter. A stupid little annoying boy who had nothing better to do than to tease me and rile me up.
Over the years though, he got better, and on very rare occasions reminded me of that really sweet boy who I met on the train. And then I started to overlook that cockiness that he showed and started noticing his better qualities. His sense of humor, his determination, his loyalty to his friends, the compassion he showed to very few people, and of course, his lean, muscular, drop-dead gorgeous Quidditch toned body.
-
What? I was a fifteen year old girl. Of course I noticed these things.
Anyways, I found myself slowly falling for the James Potter himself.
And then came 5th year.
------------
It was after OWLS. Alana wanted to sit next to the lake after a tiring day of exams so Callie and I decided to join her when I heard some sort of duel going on. I turned around and saw the object of my affections in a fierce combat with Severus Snape.
I couldn't believe it. I thought he grew up. But evidently not.
I put a hand over his and told him to stop. Not surprisingly, he complied immediately and turned away. I started to walk away when I heard something.
"I don't need help from a Mudblood like her."
I rolled my eyes. Yes, we know. I am a Mudblood. Try and think of something more inventive next time.
But James, for some reason feeling the need to defend me, started to curse him. And then I realized that I had had enough. Enough of this cocky act of his. I turned around, pretty sure my eyes were flashing. Always a danger sign. And for the first time, James didn't grin. He shrunk back a little bit and tripped slightly over a small rock.
"I don't want you to make him apologize. You're as bad as he is…hexing anyone who annoys you just because you can—I'm surprised your broomstick can get off the ground with that fat head on it. You make me SICK." I said, my breath coming in short gasps.
------------
I ran after that and just headed straight for the Prefect's bathroom. I grabbed onto a sink and started taking deep breaths. After calming myself down, I realized what exactly I had said.
And then, my eyes widened in shock.
I couldn't believe it. I never said anything like that to anyone, much less James Potter. He just made me really angry. I mean, you think I would want to yell at him? For Merlin's sake, I had a crush on him!
I had to find him, Sirius, Remus, Peter, anyone. I had to tell him how I didn't mean any of it, how it just came out and I didn't think, and how I would never say anything like that to him again. I don't know why I had to do this but I knew my conscience would never be cleared if I didn't do it.
But he avoided me for the rest of the year.
------------
Throughout the summer, I kept replaying the OWL incident (as Alana called it) over and over again in my head. And each time, my stomach churned more and more with guilt. I didn't do anything as I was really hoping that James would make the first move but he didn't.
And I was getting worried.
------------
I didn't get my weekly letters from James. I really missed him asking how my summer was going, how my family was doing, if I would go out with him, if I would visit him during the summer. Contrary to my belief, those letters were a major part of my life. No matter how much I denied it, those letters really made my day. Every day, I searched the skies, hoping to see James' owl somewhere among the clouds. On my birthday, I received many gifts but I wasn't happy. I wanted James' gift. He always gave me something special on my birthday. The present was always something that he handmade and personalized for me and his letters; oh they were the best part. And then, at eight o' clock, I saw his owl, Artemis, fly through my bedroom window. I jumped up and opened his gift, only to find a box of Chocolate Frogs. I shook it, hoping to find some sort of charm or hex on it, but instead found a small note.
Lily,
Happy Birthday.
James
And that was when I decided.
James had changed for the worst.
And it was up to me to fix it.
------------
Sixth year started and I was determined to patch things up between us, even if I died trying.
I tried to talk to him after class, before class, during class. I sent him notes, went to the boys' dormitories, even asked Professor Dumbledore to help me out. But no matter what I did, he managed to avoid me.
Nothing was working.
I was beginning to lose hope when the Christmas holidays came. And when I found out that all the Marauders were staying, a new determination came over me.
After all, an Evans never gives up.
Especially if a stupid Potter boy is really trying her patience.
------------
After very little persuasion (to my surprise), I managed to get James to walk with me towards the Gryffindor common room. Just before he said the password, I put my hand on his arm and turned him around to look at me.
James, being the incredibly subtle boy that he is, looked everywhere except at my eyes.
"James, look at me."
Reluctantly, he pulled his eyes off of the ground and looked at me.
And when he did, I found myself mouth glued together. I was being drawn in to the deep pools of green, brown, gold, blue, and gray behind those thin black rimmed glasses.
I shook my head slightly and took a deep breath.
"I wanted to say that I was sorry."
He looked a little confused as to what I was trying to say so I continued on.
"I didn't mean what I said after the OWLS. It's just that you were pranking him. I mean, if there was some reason, I guess I could understand but you yourself said that there wasn't any reason. I just got mad at you for that and whatever I said, it just slipped out. I didn't mean it. I'm sorry." I finished.
I stood there, silently hoping he would understand my entire purpose so we could skip the rest of my speech and he could just take me into his arms and kiss me with so much passion that fireworks explode…
…wait, is he leaving?
"Wait!" I said with such desperation. I can't believe that I had to choose such a daft boy to like.
He stopped but didn't turn around.
"What happened, James? What happened to you? What is this change you put yourself through? Because let me tell you, it isn't worth it. Everyone misses the old James, the carefree James. And…to tell you the truth, so do I."
He turned his head around so fast; I swore I heard his neck crack.
"Really? You missed me? I always thought you would be the last person to miss me."
I stared at him. Oh Merlin, he really is daft. Could he not tell that I really like him and I want him to snog me senseless?
"What? Why would you think that?" I asked, while trying to push away any other thoughts.
He took a deep breath and then did something really weird. He started looking around him. Doesn't he know that everyone is eating right now?
"Lily, the reason I was pranking was because of you."
At this, my eyes widened considerably. I think that my eyes stretched a few centimeters at least. But I didn't say anything and instead nodded at him to continue.
"Every time you came over to tell me off for a prank, there was this passion that arose in you. This passion lit up your face and gave you courage to pursue whatever it is you wanted. Even though, it usually ended up in either a yelling or, if I got lucky, a slap. This passion was what enamored me and…I wanted to keep seeing it. In order for me to see that passion, I kept pranking in hopes you would come over to me."
I blushed slightly and bit my lip. I am going to kill Callie. She said that my passionate side would scare people away and here is James Potter saying that that is what he loved about me. Callie, prepare your grave.
He smiled slightly and continued on, with slightly more courage than before.
"Then in 5th year, when you…er…told me off about Snape, I got to thinking. It was then I realized that I really lo-liked you."
I blushed even harder but I didn't look away. I didn't want to miss out on anything. The man of my dreams is admitting that he likes me! O Merlin, kill me now because life doesn't get any better.
"So, at the start of this year, I changed. I had pranked because I thought it was good for you, you know? I wanted to bring out that fiery enthusiasm in you. But when you said that thing after OWLS, I realized that pranking wasn't doing what I thought it was so I just stopped and that…that's what happened to me."
Okay, never mind. Life just got a million times better.
He closed his eyes but I continued to stare at him. He went through all that pain and heartache just for me? I couldn't believe it. He changed because he thought I wanted him to.
Then there was this really awkward silence where neither of us said anything. I think he was waiting for me to say something, which is reasonable seeing as to how he has been the one talking.
"James, that was probably the sweetest thing that anyone's ever done for me in my entire life and that includes when my parents took me to Paris for my 5th birthday."
Well, no they actually didn't take me. But I read in Witch Weekly that it was always good to flatter a person and exaggerate things to make them feel good.
"What?"
"I'm serious. I didn't know that all those years of pranking were for me." I said as, for the first time in probably fifteen minutes, I glanced down towards my shoes.
"Well, they were." He replied.
I laughed inwardly. That's James for you. He can use a pathetic line like that and still manage to make my heart melt.
"I mean, if you had any doubt, of course." He finished.
Not the world's best save, but I'll make an exception for him.
I just laughed quietly and shook my head.
Then, surprised at my own daring, I moved closer and closer to him, so close that I can feel his hot breath on my face.
Mmm. Pumpkin Pasties and mint.
I licked my lips, leaned forward and kissed him on the side of his mouth. It was only for a few seconds but Merlin and Agrippa, is James' skin soft.
I moved away reluctantly and cursed inwardly.
The best and probably only chance that I will ever get to kiss James Potter on the mouth and I passed the opportunity. Then again, I don't know if James likes me anymore. I just know that he liked me last year.
"Thanks, James. For all that you have ever done for me." I said and walked away from him.
Walked away from James Potter.
O God, if I have done anything good in my life, you will get me a date with James.
"Lily, wait!"
I stopped walking and turned around.
This is it.
"So, Hogsmeade is coming up."
"No, it isn't, James." I said as I walked towards him. But don't let that stop you. You can take me to the Transfiguration classroom for all I care.
"Well, I could make it come up."
I laughed, a real laugh that I haven't let out in such a long time. It felt really good. Besides, leave it to James Potter to think of a line like that.
"Alright, then." I replied and stopped right in front of him.
"Tomorrow at four?"
I nodded. Thank you, God. It looks like I have done some good. And whoever or whatever I did it for, I bow down to you.
"I'll meet you right here." I said. I tucked a lock of hair behind my ear, kissed him on the cheek, and walked away.
I could feel him staring at me as I walked down the hall and when I turned the corner, I heard a jubilant yell.
I turned around and saw James, punching the air and wearing an enormous grin. His smile was so contagious and I ended up smiling as well.
I continued my walk towards the Great Hall, with an enormous bounce in my step.
You know, I am so used to being liked so much that I have never liked someone myself.
But I have to admit, this whole liking business is fun.
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
Oh, I'm done. You can leave now.
Fin
Please review! It would make my day. And CrystalKisses, hope you liked it!