Letting Go and Grabbing Hold Chapter 6: The Heartfasting, a harry potter fanfic

V. The Heartfasting

Ginny landed gracefully in the Leaky Cauldron, where she walked over to the barkeep, Tom, to chat while she awaited Justin's arrival.

"Miss Weasley! Long time, no see; I was starting to worry!"

"Hullo, Tom! I've just been busy. How's business?"

"Eh, it's been slow all summer, but the closer the new school year gets, the more customers come through. Speaking of customers, a certain friend of yours just left. She's been asking if you –" Tom was cut short by Ginny's glare as Justin approached.

In defiance of her calm exterior, Ginny's mind raced with the abbreviated message that Tom had just given her. Was the potion finally ready? Could it actually be time to cast the last incantations and realize the moment she had been alternately dreading and looking forward to for weeks upon end?

"So, Gin, what do you want to do now that we're here?"

"Please call me Ginny. Let's just walk around and see what's going on."

"Sounds like a plan, Ginny," Justin complied, not realizing the significance of her request.

~

As they squeezed past the numerous vendors and shoppers in the street, Ginny constructed a plan to visit her friend and accomplice. Content that she'd be able to pull it off, Ginny decided to enjoy herself until it was time to part ways with Justin.

The two spent the remainder of the afternoon window shopping and getting to know each other better. By five o'clock, lunch seemed very far away, so they returned to the Leaky Cauldron for tea.

"Ginny, I really enjoyed spending the afternoon with you. Last year I always wondered what it'd be like to spend the day in Hogsmeade with you, but I never had the courage to ask you." Justin admitted while they sat in a back corner of the pub, waiting for their food to arrive.

Ginny blushed slightly. "I had a great time today, too. You really lifted my spirits. And – if you still want to – I'd love to go to Hogsmeade with you this year."

Justin grinned with delight at her response as their dinner was placed before them. As they ate, the fledgling couple began to make plans for their upcoming date in the wizarding village that neighbored Hogwart's.

When their plates had been cleared and the bill settled, Justin and Ginny walked over to the fireplace. They stood there awkwardly for a few moments, neither knowing exactly what to say. Justin was the first to find his voice.

"Well, I guess I'll see you on the Hogwart's Express?" he asked hopefully.

"That would be wonderful. If I don't find you on the platform, will you save me a seat in your compartment?"

"Sure," Justin whispered, gazing into her eyes. He couldn't believe he was making all these plans with the girl he'd fallen in love with over the past few years. He was in such a stupor, he almost didn't notice that Ginny was about to step into the blazing green fire.

"Ginny, wait!"

Damn, Ginny thought, I almost got away.

"Yes?" she said as she turned back to him.

"I just wanted to wish you a safe trip home." He kissed her cheek, making it flush brightly.

"Thanks, I will." She smiled as sweetly as she could to disguise the guilt she felt at not being able to fully reciprocate his feelings...or his honesty.

She stepped into the midst of the fire and whispered her destination so that only the flames that licked at her robes could hear...

Only a few guests remained at the Burrow, most having made their good-byes after the Floo Fighters finished their set. The trio and their dates worked on cleaning up, despite Mrs. Weasley's insistence that she would take care of it.

They paired off and split up looking for stray chocolate frogs (some had managed to jump over the garden wall), filibuster fireworks confetti, and other rubbish from the party.

Harry and Cho decided to look around outside the yard, leaving the other four to themselves. Hermione and Viktor were holding hands and stealing kisses the whole time. Ron was visibly sickened.

"A mouthful of slugs must taste better than Krum does," he whispered to Katie. "Come on, let's go see what Harry and Cho are up to," he continued, taking Katie's hand and leading her through the gate. (Hermione's piercing gaze followed them as long as it could.)

Once they had left earshot of the rest, Harry asked Cho if she'd come look behind the shed for any stray Chocolate frogs. But being a fifteen-year-old boy that was slightly intoxicated from too much butter beer, he had other things on his mind.

When Ron and Katie finally located Cho and Harry, the latter couple was snogging like there was no tomorrow. They quickly but silently turned around and headed towards the pond, where they burst into giggles.

"Well, I didn't think Harry had it in him," Ron joked once he had calmed down. Katie eyed him mischievously ...

"Do you think you do?" she suggested, making Ron turn crimson.

"Would you like to find out?" he returned, but didn't give her a chance to answer.

A few minutes later, their explorations were cut short by a very loud, very angry shout.

"Ronald Weasley! What do you think you're doing!"

"Mum! It's not what it looks like – we were – I mean…"

"I know full well what you were doing! Now get back to the house this instant!" Ron gave Katie an extremely apologetic look before sulking back towards the Burrow. Molly turned to Katie, her demeanor much calmer now, and told her "Your mum is wondering where you and Cho have gotten off to, dear. I told her I'd get you two home soon. Would you mind finding Miss Chang and bringing her back up to the house to take the floo home?"

Mystified by Mrs. Weasley's lack of reproach at having been caught with her son, Katie muttered, "Yes, of course," and sprinted off towards the shed.

Mystified by Mrs. Weasley's lack of reproach at having been caught with her son, Katie muttered, "Yes, of course," and sprinted off towards the shed.

She found Cho and Harry as she had left them earlier, but this time she took no heed of how much noise she made.

"Cho! Come on! We have to go!"

Cho and Harry broke apart instantly, embarrassed at being found in such a way, until Harry noticed Katie's disheveled appearance and asked, "So where's Ron?"

"He…uh…Mrs. Weasley needed him back at the house."

"Sure she did," Cho teased her friend.

Ron returned to the house, only to find Hermione and Viktor sharing a good-bye that Ron would rather not have witnessed.

"Can't you two get a room? Actually, forget I suggested it; a room is the last thing you need."

While Viktor blushed – something extremely rare for the burly Bulgarian – Hermione gave Ron that Mind Your Own Business look as she straightened her blouse.

As Ron played chaperone, Hermione kissed her boyfriend good-bye one last time before he apparated home. She turned to her friend and was about to unleash her wrath upon him when Harry and the two Ravenclaws walked into the room. She quickly hid her anger behind a blank expression. But, her effort was in vain since the girls totally ignored Hermione as they embraced Ron and Harry before flouncing off to the fireplace and making their exits

Hermione's presence remained unnoticed as Harry stared wistfully at the spot where Cho had just been standing. Then a grin spread over the boy's face as he turned to Ron.

"So, I heard you and Katie really "cleaned up" out there. Did you leave anything to be picked up next time?"

Ron turned the darkest shade of red he'd ever experienced before managing, "You tell me, Potter, you were out there much longer than I was! And from what I saw, you searched everywhere."

Hermione could keep silent no longer. Hell may not know fury like a woman's scorn; but two young wizards were about to.

"Honestly, could you two be any more juvenile?!?!"

"Hermione, it's not as if you weren't –" Harry began.

"I, Harry, was spending time with my boyfriend, not sneaking off with someone I just randomly paired up with!"

"So what," said Ron, "You still weren't doing anything that we weren't."

"I didn't make crude, common jokes about the person I'd been snogging as soon as they went up the floo! I actually have some semblance of respect for other people's feelings!"

"Ron, maybe we shouldn't have been –" Harry tried to cool the heated argument, but Ron was too quick in responding to Hermione.

"Respect for others' feelings? You wish, Hermione! If you really valued other people's feelings, you would have noticed how horrible it was to watch you act so…friendly…with that Bulgarian freak!" Ron spat. Harry knew it had gotten personal now, and nothing he could say would help the matter. So he sank into the shadows and let the scene play out before him, thinking that perhaps this was just what his friends needed…to battle out the emotions they had been bottling for so long.

"How dare you! He's no more of a freak than you or I! Just because of where he's from you have questioned his loyalties from the start. If you think that he's a future Death Eater just because of that, you might as well think I'm worthless because I'm a muggle-born! I can't believe you. You and I both know what it's like to be stereotyped – it's bloody hell!"

"What's worse is wondering if you'll ever see the person you care about most again! The whole time you were with him, in a country with one of the highest crime rates in the wizarding world, not once did you send an owl to let me know how you were doing! Katie may not be perfect, but I'll bet she'd have the sense to stay away from Bulgaria!"

"Why should she go to Bulgaria? If you could figure out she liked you, any wizard could have! At least Viktor isn't just interested in snogging me silly. Although, if you're interested, Bulgaria is a lovely place to snog…it's so easy to find a place to be alone out in the wilderness…it's a primal place in so many ways," Hermione stabbed, getting the jealous glare from Ron that she had strived for. "At any rate, we actually talk to each other. I'll bet you didn't say more than a few inches of parchment-worth to that Ravenclaw today. At least not anything that you'd repeat to your mother!"

"Great! Now I'm gonna have nightmares about why you couldn't find the energy to owl me! And by the way, I've never just been interested in snogging! I want to be with someone that I can talk to…that I can confide in. Someone that understands that there's more to me than red hair and a famous best friend!"

"And you're so sure that you've found such with that…that excuse for a witch! I'll bet she didn't know what a great guy you were when she set her sights on you. She probably still doesn't realize it! How insufferably stupid can she be! It boggles my mind…"

"What are you talking about! She's perfectly able to carry on a meaningful conversation. As good as any we've had!"

"I know all too well her capacity for conversation. She pesters me in the library all the time with her silly questions and irrelevant chitchat. She wouldn't know a meaningful conversation if it hexed her!"

"That's not true, Hermione. It can't be. She's got the highest marks of all the fifth-year Ravenclaws!"

"I only have myself to blame for that horrifying bit of trivia," Hermione muttered.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means, Ronald Weasley, that the sorting hat wanted to put me in Ravenclaw. But I told it that if I didn't get put into the same house as you, I'd make use of a nice little unraveling charm from the Standard Book of Spells, chapter forty-three."

The reality of what Hermione had just implied swept through Ron's body like wildfire. He stood there, speechless, while Hermione waited for some response form him. Any response from him.

But none came. Unable to stand the embarrassment at what she had heatedly revealed, Miss Granger fled, tears streaming from her brown eyes as she made her ascent of the stairs.

As she collapsed onto her bed, she began to curse herself for letting go of her most guarded secret…the fact that she had fallen madly in love with that fiery-haired wizard the moment she had laid eyes on him nearly four years ago.

"Ron, you alright?" Harry approached his friend. Ron turned to Harry with a look of pure shock and utter amazement on his face.

"I think I'm in love with her," he sighed before answering Harry's question. "No, I'm not ok...and I know Hermione isn't, either..."

"Well, that's the understatement of the year." Harry chided. But Ron's crestfallen demeanor sobered his best friend faster than a bludger to the head. "Sorry, couldn't resist. Must be the butterbeer talking…again. We were rather boorish just then, weren't we?"

Ron nodded his agreement. "I'd take it back in a heartbeat. Hermione didn't deserve all those horrible things I said. I was acting like such a git. I only hope she can manage to forgive me," he rambled sullenly.

"Look at the bright side, mate, if you two hadn't gotten so riled up at each other, you wouldn't know how she feels – or finally realized how you feel, for that matter."

"But I didn't say anything back, Harry! What am I going to do? Think I should go talk to her?"

"No, it'd be best if you let her calm down first. Besides, Ginny left the party quite a while ago, and she's probably up there helping Hermione sort herself out. In the meantime, I'll help you figure out how to make it up to her."

Ginny swirled through the floo network, but being that her destination was only down the road from where she started, she didn't have to wait very long before exiting the soot-filled passageways.

She dusted herself off and looked around to see if anyone had noticed her. But the hearth inside Flourish & Blott's was nestled in the very back of the musty bookstore – where most likely only Hermione had ventured, she mused.

Ginny stepped out into the bustling street she had been roaming with Justin only moments before, and began walking to the place she had been trying to return to for days. As she strolled, she let the nostalgia take hold of her thoughts.

The first time she had made this journey, the night air had been just as cool and inviting, the sky as golden. Her senses were flooded with memories as she breathed in the crisp evening air, forcing Ginny to replay the commencement of her secret activities on that day so many weeks ago…

A/N: Ginny Flashback!

Ginny nervously stood in front of the shop, wringing her hands. It was a small shop, one she would have overlooked if she hadn't been looking for it specifically. The brass plaque on the heavy oak door was so tarnished she could barely make out the inscription:

MacAuley's Spirit Room

Established 1943

Gathering all her Gryffindor courage, she inhaled deeply and pushed open the door. Inside she found lots of very interesting magical devices, none of which she had the foggiest idea as to its purpose. A young witch, probably only a few years past graduation, stood behind the counter, eyeing the even younger red-haired witch with utmost curiosity.

"How may I help you?" she asked with both professionalism and mystery hanging heavy on her words.

"I…um…are you Madame MacAuley?" Ginny stuttered.

"I am. Alexandra MacAuley, to be precise. But you may call me Sandra, if you wish."

"Alright then…Sandra…um…I need you to help me to…to make this," Ginny placed a sheet of parchment on the counter that she had used to take notes on from her father's book. "I know that there was one made before, no matter how much it's played off as a myth. Tom, at the Leaky Cauldron, said that a Madame MacAuley had made it. That led me here."

Sandra stared at the parchment as if seeing a ghost from her past. "It was my mother that made the amulet. It is the only one still in existence. How did you find out about it?"

"I read about it in Muggle Attempts at Magic: A Wizard's Field Guide."

"Hmm, I hadn't thought of it being in there. I should have, I suppose, since knowledge of it has leaked to muggle culture a number of times. The Phoenicians, Egyptians, Gnostics, those of the middle ages, and its true meaning has been so contorted by present day muggles…well, it's just shameful. Anyway, enough of the history lesson, for now anyway. If you're going to make the amulet, you need to understand its powers first. Let me close up the shop and we can get started. I f you're going to make the amulet, you need to understand it's powers first. Let me close up the shop and we can get started."

Ginny's thoughts remained on those introductory lessons about the amulet's meaning and power as she neared the final crossroads of her path. Had she been more aware of the present she would have noticed the figure lurking in the shadows; she would have felt a chill inch down her spine as the steely eyes followed her graceful gait down the road.

But as she reached the intersection, where off to one side a sign bearing the words "Knockturn Alley" hung, she was unaware of the darkly cloaked wizard that was now shadowing her as she turned onto the narrow side street where The Spirit Room took residence.

As Ginny walked down Diurn Alley – a side street that was the Yang to Knockturn Alley's Yin – the tall, dark figure steadily kept its distance as she continued to reminisce.

"The first thing you must know about the amulet is its origin. It was created by an ancient and powerful wizard. In those times muggles were not as protected from magic as they are now, and so knowledge of the amulet seeped into various cultures; the inscription, Abracadabra, is a word that has many derived meanings. In Judaic mythology, it is a cabalistic charm that is supposed to bring healing powers. When split into a – bra – ca – dabra it can be clearly recognized as the first four letters of the Phoenician alphabet. The Aramaics devised it into three words, abra – cad – abra, which mean 'it will pass when it will pass.' And the Gnostics in Rome used it as part of a formula to invoke the aid of beneficent spirits against disease, misfortune, and death."

"And all those...those muggle interpretations…they all hold a bit of truth, don't they?" Ginny asked.

"Yes, they do. But there is so much more to it. Which is why, I suppose, that you are so interested in it?" Ginny nodded, and then Sandra continued.

"Well, judging from your notes, that book you read didn't do the amulet justice. The Abracadabra Amulet is the only magical artifact that can keep its sister spell, the Avada Kedavra curse, from succeeding –"

"Does it really? Are you quite sure?" Ginny interrupted.

"If made correctly, yes, it can and it does. If you are going to produce an amulet, you must be aware of the consequences to yourself that will result. The amulet is powered by love, a magic greater than any that can be performed with a wand. You must devote your heart fully to the One whom you design the amulet for. This sacrifice will take away from you all ability to give your heart to anyone else, for as long as you shall live. It is a long and difficult process; once you reach the final incantations there is no turning back. Your heart will reside in small golden pendant, to forever be held by its wearer. It will be some time before that bridge will have to be burned, though, so I suppose we can get started, and I will explain more about the amulet's powers as we go."

Ginny once again hesitated in front of the smooth oak door. She knew that this was it. She would cross the threshold into The Spirit Room with her heart pounding away with devotion for Harry, and leave having pledged that love into a carefully designed talisman that she would grasp tightly in her hand. Knowing that she could be the boy-who-lived's only chance to make it through the coming encounters with the Dark Lord, she held her head high and determinedly entered the seemingly insignificant shop.

"Ginny! I'm so glad you made it! The amulet is ready for the final ingredients and incantations," Sandra exclaimed in greeting. "Well, better put up the usual protective charms." Sandra flicked her wand about, locking the door and making the shop appear dark from the outside.

"I'm so sorry, Sandra, I just wasn't able to get away. The last few weeks have been so busy!" Ginny went on to explain about Harry and Charlie's unexpected arrival, her late night counseling sessions with Harry about Cho, the birthday party plans, and the day's adventures at the Burrow and in Diagon Alley with Justin.

"Hmm," Sandra said as she handed Ginny a vile of powdered rose thorns, "So does this mean you're over Harry? If so, the incantation won't work, you know."

"Are you kidding? Of course I'm not over Harry! I don't think I ever could be. I just decided that if I'm going to be heartbroken the rest of my life, I should at least have a little fun on the side."

"That's not fair to Justin – or anyone else that comes along."

"Who said life was fair?" Ginny retorted.

"Are you sure you're only 14, Ginny?" Sandra teased. "I know as well as anyone that life's not fair…but that doesn't give anyone the right to purposefully screw with someone's emotions," she finished bitterly.

"Speaking from experience?" Ginny prodded as she stirred the bubbling cauldron that held the amulet.

"In a sense…it's about my parents." Ginny's eyes flicked away from the potion and locked with Sandra's.

"You've never told me about them…other than the fact that your mother made the amulet for your father."

"It's a long story, Ginny…basically, he loved her but didn't see how it would work out, so he ended it…that was before he knew that mum was carrying me….So, she never told him; she loved him so much she wanted to respect his wishes, and never saw him again. So I was left without a father, my mother without her soul-mate, and my father without the family he didn't even know he had…all because HE decided to screw with mummy's feelings, putting his own ahead of all else…" Sandra began to cry.

"Oh, Sandra, I'm so sorry…perhaps you're right…"

"Right about what?"

"About leading Justin on. I should tell him the truth. I guess I'll save that conversation for the Hogwart's Express…not exactly the type of thing you owl someone about." Ginny sighed and then realized that the brew in front of her had turned a deep vermilion. "Look, it's ready!"

The two witches carefully retrieved the rose-gold amulet from the potion with a pair of tongs, then set it on a rack to dry and cool down.

"Alright, just the setting of the incantations is left, right?" Ginny asked, even though she knew the answer. She and Sandra had memorized the procedure, lest something happen to the scrawled notes that the latter's mother had made describing it.

"Yes, and that's all you. Would you like me to leave you alone? It might be easier to focus on Harry if I'm not watching over you."

"Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. I'll call you when I'm done," Ginny answered. Sandra nodded and climbed the stairs to her private quarters above the shop.

Ginny picked up the amulet and six golden chains that had been prepared during her last visit to the shop, and sat cross-legged on the floor. She laid the chains out on the floor in front of her and held the amulet tight in her left hand. With her right, she drew a circle around herself with her wand, and began the amulet's dedication ceremony.

[A/N: In the next passage, the words in Italics are the words spoken by Ginny]

Within this circle I declare my intent to be heartfasted to the one for whom this amulet was made, and I speak of my intent to the magical higher powers.

The promises I make today and the tie that is bound here will form a strong union; it will cross the years and lives of each soul's growth.

I seek to enter this ceremony.

In times past it was believed that the human soul shared characteristics with all things divine. It is this belief which assigns virtues to the cardinal directions: East, South, West, and North. It is in this tradition that I request a blessing in support of this ceremony.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the East:

Communication of the heart, mind, and body.

Fresh beginnings with the rising of each Sun.

The knowledge of growth found in the sharing of silences.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the South:

Warmth of hearth and home.

The heat of the heart's passion.

The light created to lighten the darkest of times.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the West:

The deep commitments of the lake.

The swift excitement of the river.

The refreshing cleansing of the rain.

The all encompassing passion of the sea.

Blessed be this union with the gifts of the North:

A firm foundation on which to build fertility of the fields to enrich our lives.

A stable home to which we may always return.

Each of these blessings from the four cardinal directions emphasizes those things which will help me to build a successful union. Yet they are only tools. Tools which I must use to create what I seek in this union.

I may cause him pain, but it is not my intent.

I intend to share his pain, and ease it.