Hearts Are Meant To: Chapter 3
Luke flopped down on his bunk and stared at the underside of Wedge's bunk above his. The rest of the pilots were gathered in the next room over, talking loudly and laughing drunkenly. Luke, however, needed his solitude in order to sort out his thoughts. It was official: Genna and Dack were now Rogues. That meant that Luke was now responsible for the lives of two more people. Two more people would be looking to him to lead them through the next battle and come out alive on the other side. And of those two, one of them was probably more qualified to be in his position than he was.
The one for whose life he really didn't want to be responsible. The one for whose life he was terrified of being responsible.
What was wrong with him? He didn't even know her. He'd only met her eight hours ago. How had he become so irrational over a single person in only eight hours' time?
How had he fallen so deeply for a single person in only eight hours' time?
He flopped over onto his stomach and folded his hands under his chin. No, he was being ridiculous. He hadn't fallen for her. It was impossible. You don't fall for someone at first sight. You can be intrigued by them, or even attracted to them. But you don't fall for them. You don't have an image of them emblazoned upon the very core of your being. It just doesn't happen. He must be overreacting. Maybe it was the pressures of commanding a squadron of pilots, or the stress of knowing that they needed to have another base lined up in case something went wrong here on Ithull. Or the strange isolation he sometimes felt as a result of his pursuit of the Force training he barely understood.
Or maybe it was because she was just so incredible. She was more than incredible. She was perfect. She was a great pilot, a beautiful woman, and a formidable presence in the base.
And, suddenly, she was in his room.
His head turned toward the door a split second after he heard it slide open. Lost in his thoughts, he hadn't sensed her approach. Yet, there she stood, leaning heavily on the doorframe, staring down at him.
"Have a headache, Commander?" she drawled.
She was also very drunk, from the looks of it. Her brown eyes seemed slightly glassy, and she was leaning more heavily than a person normally would unless they were intoxicated.
Luke sat up quickly, smacking his head on Wedge's bunk as he did so. He rubbed his sore head as he gazed up at her. "I do now," he grumbled.
She jerked her thumb toward the other room. "You're missing a great time."
"Deliberately engaging in an activity that is going to make me feel miserable in the morning isn't exactly my idea of a good time," he muttered, trying to keep his voice steady even as his heart raced in his chest.
"Many would argue with you," she replied moving unsteadily toward him.
Luke watched her nervously as she made her way toward the bunk and sat down rather ungracefully. He noted that she sat particularly close to him, and his heart nearly jumped out of his chest. Her proximity was having a somewhat profound effect on him at the moment, and he resolved not to look at her. Even drunk, she was beautiful. And somehow, she seemed more dangerous, though he didn't know why.
"So why aren't you still over there?" he asked while staring at his feet.
"Oh, you know," she laughed in her husky voice. "Too many men hanging around, hitting on me, trying to show me what studs they are. Gets rather annoying."
"You seemed to be enjoying it at dinner," he countered, a bit more sharply than he intended.
"Oh, I was," she said, leaning in closer. He could smell the alcohol on her breath, and he shuddered. That wasn't exactly the most attractive scent in the galaxy. "But maybe the person I wanted to have hitting on me wasn't in the room at the time," she continued.
He balked at that. He'd never expected such a comment from any female, least of all this new recruit who was now under his command. Could she possibly be more forward? Shocked at her unexpected comment, he looked at her in disbelief.
She, in turn, laughed. "That look was absolutely priceless!" she giggled. "Well worth the price of admission. Don't worry, Commander. I was only teasing."
Luke grimaced at the heavy scent of liquor that now hung very close to his face. "You are so drunk," he said with disgust.
Genna frowned at him. "And you are quite the prig, aren't you?"
Luke's eyes narrowed at her. "Excuse me?"
"Come on, have a little fun," she said. "Or are you above that, Lieutenant Commander Skywalker? Can't fraternize with us lesser beings in the lower ranks?"
Luke simply glared at her. He couldn't believe that this beautiful woman had so suddenly become an obnoxious drunkard.
"No, wait," she said giggling. "I know what it is. The guys were right: you're saving yourself for the Princess, aren't you?"
"What?" Luke cried, unable to hide his astonishment.
"Oh, that's just so adorable," she remarked, continuing to laugh. "It's a shame, though. We could have had something, you and I."
"You know," Luke began sharply, pointing a finger right in her face, "I don't know you that well, but I like you better sober."
"Didn't your mother ever teach you that it's rude to point?" she teased.
Luke tensed and looked away. "No."
"Well, she should have."
Inexplicably, Luke turned to her and snapped, "Considering I never knew her, that would have been difficult!" He looked back down at the floor, trying to swallow back the anger and hostility that seemed to be burning a hole in his chest. He could feel his jaw muscles tense, and he wondered why she had riled him so much. He also wondered why he hadn't been able to control his outburst. He'd been getting much better at that lately. Why had he snapped now?
Suddenly, he felt her hand on his arm. "Sith, I'm sorry," he heard her say. "I was only teasing you. I didn't know."
"It's all right," Luke replied tensely, and not very convincingly. He was still staring at the floor.
He heard and sensed Genna flop backwards on the bed with a sigh. "I guess I did kind of overdo it over there." When Luke remained silent, she continued. "I don't usually get this drunk. But, they kept offering me drinks, and I kept accepting. Kind of stupid, I know. But, hey, what can you do?"
"Tell them, 'No thanks'," answered Luke.
Genna laughed. "That won't get me a date, though."
"Well, neither will acting like a drunken jerk," he argued.
"Point taken," she sighed. "Although I'm usually not this bad. I'm probably not making that great an impression on you, am I?"
At that, Luke felt his lips twitch upward, threatening to form into a smile. Ironically, as drunk and obnoxious as she was right now, he was thankful for it. Before she had entered his room, he'd thought she was the perfect woman, and he'd been obsessed with that ideal. She was just as Leia had been when he first spotted the Princess on the Death Star, a dream girl. Now, however, like Leia and everyone else, Genna was clearly fallible. She was human. Somehow, he felt more at ease knowing that. He turned and looked at her. She was lying on her back, her black ringlets fanned out on the bunk. Looking up at him with her large brown eyes, she seemed just as apologetic as drunk. Softening, he did, then, smile at her.
"As your commanding officer, no," he finally commented.
"Damn," she groaned, turning her gaze upward to Wedge's bunk. "Guess I'll just have to show you up on the sims tomorrow."
Now it was Luke's turn to laugh. "With the hangover you're likely to have, I'd like to see you try."
Looking back at him, she propped herself rather unsteadily on one elbow. "Is that a challenge?"
Luke shook his head with a grin. "I don't make challenges to people who aren't apt to remember them in the morning."
She leaned in closer, "Well, then, since I'm not likely to remember this in the morning, as you suggest, can I ask you something?"
Luke arched is eyebrows dubiously. "What?"
"Do you think I'm a good pilot?"
Luke laughed. "You're a Rogue, now, aren't you?"
Genna pressed, "But am I good?"
Feeling more comfortable in her presence than he had since she'd arrived, he gently took her chin in his hand. "Judging from the sims, you're better than good."
She smiled at that, her alluring dimple reappearing on her cheek. "Thank you."
Luke frowned as he continued to hold her chin. "Why does that mean so much to you?"
In response, she flopped back down with a sigh. "Because that's all I have." She shut her eyes. "That's all I am," she added in barely a whisper.
A wistful smile crept upon his face. He knew what that was like. Growing up on Tatooine, the only thing he'd had to cling to was his ability to pilot. That was the one shining light in the dreariness he'd felt life in the desert to be. "I know what you mean," he replied softly.
Genna remained quiet. Too quiet, actually. Her breathing seemed regular and even, her lips slightly parted. Luke leaned forward. Had she fallen asleep?
"Genna?" he asked quietly.
No response.
Luke groaned. She had, indeed, fallen asleep. And while the thought of having a beautiful woman asleep in his bed was not exactly a nightmare, it did leave Luke with one problem. Where was he supposed to sleep? He was not quite ready to sleep in the same bed with a girl he'd just met, no matter how beautiful she was. Maybe he was priggish, like she'd said, but he wasn't about to do it anyway.
He saw that her legs were dangling over the edge, and he gently lifted them onto the bed and straightened her out. He grabbed the blanket from the foot of the bed and draped it over her, noting that she must have really had too much to drink to have passed out so thoroughly and quickly. Yes, she was definitely human. Beautiful, but human.
He gently reached over and brushed one of her curls away from her face. The touch was electric, but he resisted the urge to lean in and kiss her softly. That would have been a bit too silly and romantic. Instead, he smiled at the strange sensations that she had wrought in him and which were now coursing through his body, and went in search of a place to sleep for the night. And he knew he'd be teased about this in the morning.
************
Luke awoke in the middle of the night to the unpleasant sound of someone being very sick in the 'fresher. His instinctive desire to help and assist people in trouble kicked in before his sleepy brain did, and he swung his legs out of bed. The floor didn't meet him where he expected it to, and he fell. Hard. Pain brought him to full awareness in an instant as his foot twisted in what was definitely the wrong direction with a sickening snap. Why hadn't he remembered that he was sleeping in Wedge's bunk before he tried to get out of bed? His eyes watered as he bit down on his lip to keep from howling as he sank to the floor.
The horrible sound of retching continued from the 'fresher. Of course, now that he was fully awake but in no shape to offer any assistance, he knew exactly who was in there.
"You okay, Genna?" he asked in what irritatingly sounded like a whimper. He really needed to work on his ability to handle pain.
He was answered by the sound of more retching. Clearly, she wasn't okay. He'd been afraid something like this would happen.
Now what? He was stuck on the floor of the very dark room while a very beautiful woman was in obvious distress. He tried to get his good foot under him in order to pull himself off of the floor somewhat, and, using his own bunk as leverage, he managed to stand. The distance between his bunk and the 'fresher had never seemed so great. He bit his lip and tried a one-legged hop, but winced as the jarring movement sent pain radiating up his leg. The staggering intensity of it began to sap his strength, and he decided that crawling across the floor would probably be his best bet. Gratefully sitting down on the cold floor once again, he took a moment to collect himself as the throb in his ankle lessened somewhat. Then, planting his arms behind him, he scooted himself backwards on his rear toward the 'fresher.
Once by the door, he knocked on it and called, "Genna, how are you doing in there?"
Silence greeted him from the other side.
That worried him. "Genna, answer me."
In response, the fresher door opened, and a grey-faced Genna appeared standing shakily in the doorway. She looked bewildered as she replied, "I think I'm a little better, now that I've gotten that over with." She paused. "Where are you?"
"Down here," Luke called from the patch of floor by the door, bathed in the light of the 'fresher. When she looked down at him, he offered a slight wave and smile.
"What the blazes?" Genna asked, as she knelt down beside him. Her normally radiant brown skin was pasty and covered with beads of sweat, and her eyes showed that she was definitely dealing with one gigantic hangover. Yet, as awful as she must have been feeling, she clearly seemed more concerned about the young man who was sitting beside the 'fresher door instead of standing beside it.
"I was just checking to see if you're okay," he said innocently.
Genna frowned, puzzled. "Okay, I guess. My head may be a little out of sorts at the moment, but . . .can I ask why you're sitting on the floor?"
Luke gave a weak grin. "I think I broke my ankle," he explained lamely.
Genna ran a hand across her damp forehead. "Are you serious?"
Mortified beyond words, Luke nodded. "I forgot that I was sleeping on the top bunk."
"And you fell trying to get out, right?" Genna finished for him. "Force's sake, Luke, couldn't you have done this when I wasn't feeling miserable?"
"It's your fault," he countered, laughing in spite of his predicament.
"My fault?" Genna asked, confused.
"If you hadn't been so loud in there, I'd still be asleep," Luke explained. "Learn how to get sick quietly instead of waking up your roommates and making them get out of bed because they're concerned."
"What?"
"Hey, Wedge never woke me up, and that's one guy who knows the price of partying," Luke said, innocently.
"Wedge is normally your roommate, I take it?" she asked. When he nodded, she queried, "Well, where is he now?"
"Next door," Luke answered. "He did the same thing you did, passing out from the alcohol on someone else's bunk. There was a lot of that going on, from what I understand. I don't think Alliance Command is going to be all that happy in the morning."
"Yeah, well they're going to be even less happy when they find out you broke your ankle getting out of bed," Genna added with a wry grin.
Luke smiled sheepishly. "Well, I don't think it's actually broken. At least, I hope it isn't."
"Let's just see about that," Genna argued. Rising to her feet with a loud groan, she put one hand to her head and staggered to the light switch. The room was instantly flooded with light, and Genna squinted, moaning once more and swearing in several languages. She staggered back over to Luke and crouched down beside him.
Luke was suddenly very self-conscious. His chest was bare, as he was clad only in a pair of long sleeping pants. Crossing his arms to shield himself somewhat from her gaze, he realized that it could have been worse. He could have been wearing shorts.
Much to his relief, her gaze was focused squarely on his ankle. Luke glanced down at it as well, and he immediately wished he hadn't. His toes were badly discolored, and his ankle was already beginning to swell. Not to mention, it just didn't look quite right.
"Can you move your toes at all?" Genna asked.
Luke managed a slight shift of his big toe, but the pain it brought made him want to cry out. Refusing to show weakness in front of the woman seated beside him, he swallowed back the cry with an effort that threatened to bring tears to his eyes. He was saved from having to find his voice, however, when Genna spoke first.
"I'll take that as a 'no'," she remarked with a sympathetic grin.
Luke grimaced and spoke through a very tight throat, "So is it broken, you think?"
"Still not sure," Genna answered with a shrug. "And I don't want to be the one to mess with it to find out. It could just as well be a very bad sprain, but I'm a pilot, not a medic."
"So I hear," he commented dryly.
For a moment, he was afraid his words had been taken as an insult, for she seemed to pale once he'd said them. But then, she suddenly rose and crossed over him to the 'fresher once again. Frowning at the sounds that followed, Luke really felt sorry for her. Well, at least he wasn't the only one showing weakness.
"What exactly did you have to drink last night?" he ventured to ask once things had quieted down once more.
Genna groaned. "Distilled j'ykuga, I believe."
Luke shuddered. "Wonder where they picked that up. That stuff's harsh."
"You're telling me," Genna said, coming back out of the 'fresher to slump beside him. She was quite pale. "I've gotten sick on it before. Don't know what possessed me to drink it again."
"A shot at a date is what I believe you said last night," Luke teased.
Genna scowled, but was too weak to put any real venom behind it.
"So, now what?" Luke asked after a moment's silence. "We can call for a medic, and get the base all riled up with speculation over what happened. Or we can sit here and wait until someone wakes up and can help me over to the medcenter as discreetly as possible."
Genna shrugged. "Well, I could use a few painkillers, myself, right now. But I'd rather just sit here for a little bit. If you can hold out, that is?"
Luke nodded. "As long as I don't move, I can handle the throbbing. And I've got some painkillers in the chest at the foot of the bed, if you want them."
Genna could barely contain her relief. "Oh, yes! Thank you," she cried as she headed over to the chest he had indicated. Sure enough, there they were, and she gladly helped herself to a few. "But if you don't mind me asking, how did you manage a stash of painkillers?"
Luke smiled. "My friend, Han, lent them to me. Said you never know when you might need them."
Genna nodded. "Isn't that the truth!"
"Actually," Luke said sheepishly, "could you pass me a few?" He really didn't want to ask, but his ankle was actually hurting quite a bit, even though he was keeping it still.
Genna passed them over to him with a slight grin. "You want a pillow to go with that?"
He quickly popped the painkillers into his mouth and asked, "Huh?"
"To elevate your foot and keep it from swelling as badly," she explained in irritation, as though this were common knowledge all over the galaxy.
Luke blushed. "Uh, sure," he said, although she had already moved to grab the pillow.
"Lift your leg, and I'll slide the pillow under your foot," she instructed.
Luke did as instructed, although the pain of lifting his leg became so great she had to assist. Who would have thought that one little twist of the ankle could be so painful? He'd heard of people losing limbs and not batting an eye. Well, judging from how he was handling this, he was going to be a lot more careful with his appendages from now on.
Once Genna had maneuvered the pillow under his foot, she slumped down beside him against the wall. "Better?"
"That was supposed to make me feel better?" Luke asked incredulously.
Genna shrugged. "Like I said, I'm a pilot, not a medic."
Luke grinned at her and then tried to relax against the wall as she had done. This wasn't exactly his idea of spending a night with a beautiful woman, he mused, wondering what else could possibly happen on this rather awkward evening. After all, it was still several hours until dawn.
*******************
"That's a lie!"
"No, I swear," Luke laughed, looking down into the eyes of the woman whose head was pillowed on his lap. Unable to sleep due to their various pains and the awkwardness of the situation, they'd spent the last two hours talking about anything and everything. In the process, Genna had stretched out on the floor and placed her head upon his good leg to get a bit more comfortable. This, of course, suited Luke just fine. "It's the truth."
She shifted slightly, as though trying to gauge his sincerity. "You mean to tell me that the Empire is wasting all these resources searching the galaxy for a punk who got off a lucky shot?"
"Hey," Luke scowled defensively. "I wouldn't say it was lucky. That took some serious skill."
"Okay, farm boy," Genna teased. "So where did you pick up this 'skill,' as you call it? Dusting crops?"
Luke shook his head with a grin. "Natural talent. My father was a great pilot, so I guess I inherited it from him."
Genna was silent a moment. "You never met him, did you?" she finally asked in an odd tone.
Taken off-guard by the question, Luke stiffened. "How did you know?"
Genna shrugged her shoulders. The gesture was somewhat awkward in her current position. "I guess it was the way you said that just then. Kind of like the way I talk about my own dad. Never knew him either. Heard stories about him all the time from my mother and my uncle, but I never met him. He died right after I was born."
Luke frowned. "But your family talked about him?"
Genna looked at him incredulously. "Well, yeah. My mom always said how much she loved him. She always said that talking about him kept him alive for her somehow. And there were pictures of him all over the house when I was growing up." She paused for a moment, losing herself in memory. "You know, it's weird, but she would laugh at a funny story about him and seem like she was going to cry at the same time. I never really understood it, but it seemed to be her way of making sure I grew up with a strong sense of knowing both my parents, even though I only grew up with one."
Her words pierced Luke with a sudden sense of longing and regret. He hadn't grown up knowing either of his parents. He'd even been discouraged from asking questions about them. As a result, he knew next to nothing about his father and even less of his mother. It wasn't fair, he thought, shutting his eyes to the sudden rush of envy he now felt. Envy that he'd often felt throughout his life.
"Oh, stars, Luke," he heard Genna gasp suddenly, and he felt her head lift from his lap.
He opened his eyes to see what was wrong, afraid she was going to be sick again. Instead, she was staring at him with a look that very closely resembled pity. His stomach soured.
Not taking her eyes from him, she said, "I'm sorry. It must be the alcohol; it's making me dumb and stupid. I just realized, Luke, that you didn't know either of your parents."
Unable to stand the pathetic gaze she had fixed him with, he turned away. "No, I didn't."
"And here I am talking about my own family, not realizing what you must be feeling."
Luke couldn't help but laugh weakly, even as he stared at the floor. "Don't worry about it. I've had twenty years to get used to being an orphan, and Leia talks about her family on Alderaan all of the time."
There was a silence from Genna that stretched out for what seemed to be an eternity until Luke finally turned his head to look at her. He expected to see her still gazing at him with a sickening look of utter pity. What he saw was quite different.
Her features were tight and her eyes reflected a deep pool of pain that was welling within her. In a strained voice she whispered, "We all do."
Luke felt the blood drain from his face as the full import of her words hit him like a blow to the gut. "You're from Alderaan?" he finally managed. She didn't answer, but her face told him everything. "B-but, how?"
She snorted, a single tear attempting to work its way out of her left eye, even as she tried to appear indifferent. "Hey, we can't all look and act like the Princess Leia Organa, now."
Bemused, Luke could only stare at her, not knowing what to say.
Genna sighed, and continued, taking the pressure off of him to speak. "You thought I was Corellian, right? The whole ego thing? I'm kind of an enigma, I know. A 'peace-loving' Alderaanian who joins the Imperial Navy and then betrays them by joining the Rebellion after her homeworld is destroyed. What can I say? I've never been good with labels and titles. Hell, I've only been good at one thing in my whole life." She paused, tears welling up in her eyes as she tried to speak once more in a choked voice, "I believed it all, you know? All the lies, all the promises. After all, what else was I gonna' do? I was a young kid who could fly better than anyone I knew. So after I listened to a recruitment tape a couple hundred times, I enrolled in the Academy. 'Join the Ranks of the Proud,' etcetera, etcetera. And I was good! I made it! I was a girl and I made it! I graduated straight into the Imperial Navy, and I thought I had finally become someone I could be proud of." She broke off, a sudden, unexpected sob welling in her throat. "But what do you do when you find out that everything you believe in is a lie? That you've become part of something that destroys what it's promised to protect? That you were somehow a part of the deaths of millions? Your own family? Your whole world? What do you do when all you can feel is anger and hatred and self-loathing?"
Luke watched as she seemed to struggle with the emotions that were threatening to drown her, and he reached over to squeeze her hand in sympathy. His gesture didn't have the effect he intended, however. She flinched and jerked her hand away, hardening her expression and staring at him squarely in the eyes.
"You know what you do?" she asked, leveling her voice. "You plant a bomb on your own carrier and then go into hiding until the Rebel scouts find you!"
For a moment, Luke could only stare back at her in stunned silence. Her confession had completely taken him aback, and he wasn't sure how to process the information. Did she want him to think she was cold and vengeful? Did she want him to think that she was hurt and distraught enough to do anything in her power to right the wrongs of the Empire?
Did she want him to think that she was a murderer?
All of these thoughts raced through his mind as he stared into the eyes of the young woman he had come to know so intimately in the past seventeen hours. And yet he didn't think any of these things about her. In fact, he thought reflectively, she was much like himself.
Undaunted, he reached for her hand once more and gripped it tightly so that she couldn't pull it away. Without shifting his gaze from her eyes, he said quietly, "Or you fire a single shot that kills an entire space-station full of people."
They remained silent for a long space, as she seemed to be trying to reconcile his own words with what she had just revealed to him. Luke refused to take his eyes off of her, however.
Eventually, she spoke again. "I guess we're just a pair of dangerous criminals, then, aren't we?" Her face was emotionless, but Luke could feel the tension in her dissipate.
"Yeah," Luke agreed. "I guess, in a normal universe, we would be." He paused with a slight, soft grin. "But here, we're just another group of rebels."
Luke noted with satisfaction that the tension really did melt from her features then, and she smiled gently back at him. "That's quite true," she said, shifting her body to lean her head upon his leg once more. "And you know what else?"
"What?"
"We're going to be a couple of tired rebels in the morning," she replied, smiling up at him from his lap.
Luke chuckled. "Well, considering the circumstances, I think I'll probably be excused from duty tomorrow morning. Though, I'm not sure about you."
Genna's smile broadened, even though it held a hint of self-reproach. "I'm pretty sure they'll find me in no shape to do anything effective come daybreak.
"You and about two thirds of the pilots, from what I understand," Luke amended wryly.
Genna playfully smacked him in the chest in response. "Well, what kind of commander are you? Letting your men get drunk like that? You should be ashamed of yourself, Lieutenant Commander Skywalker?"
Luke rolled his eyes. "Not that again."
Genna responded with a soft laugh as she closed her eyes and relaxed upon Luke's lap. "You'd better just be happy that I have a really bad hangover right now."
Intrigued, Luke looked down at her and asked, "Why?"
"Because it got me to spend the night with you, didn't it?" she teased, opening one eye to look up at him. "I'm not usually so forward with commanding officers."
Luke laughed at that, partly out of true amusement and partly out of a self-conscious desire to mask the surge of feelings her brief comment had suddenly released through his body. "Well, I must admit that you are a much nicer looking roommate than Wedge," he teased back.
Genna grinned back at him, closing her eyes once more. "It's just a shame we're in such bad shape right now. We could have had a lot of fun this evening."
Luke shrugged. "I don't know. I've actually enjoyed getting to know you like this, as strange as that may seem."
Genna opened her eyes again, and furrowed her brows at him. "You're right, that is strange," she remarked, with a glance that told Luke she thought he was absolutely insane. "I mean, what could be more fun than you twisting your ankle and me carving a path in the floor to the 'fresher while nursing a killer headache?" Then her gaze softened. "But, to be brutally honest, I think I kind of enjoyed it, too." She closed her eyes again and laughed. "What kind of sicko does that make me?"
"Dunno." Luke looked down and stared at her relaxed features for a moment. With her head resting on his leg and her hair fanned out across his pants, she was absolutely beautiful. Her soft, brown skin beckoned to be touched, and Luke found it hard to resist. In fact, he was suddenly finding several urges hard to resist, including the irrational desire to lean forward and kiss her beautiful lips. Resolving to keep his hands and lips to himself, he pulled his gaze away from her and shut his own eyes. Willing himself to relax as he leaned against the wall, he realized that he was actually quite sleepy. Genna seemed to have succumbed to her own tiredness, as her head was growing heavier against his leg. Sighing softly, he added, "I guess I'll just have to get back to you in the morning."
Within seconds, he was asleep.
Luke flopped down on his bunk and stared at the underside of Wedge's bunk above his. The rest of the pilots were gathered in the next room over, talking loudly and laughing drunkenly. Luke, however, needed his solitude in order to sort out his thoughts. It was official: Genna and Dack were now Rogues. That meant that Luke was now responsible for the lives of two more people. Two more people would be looking to him to lead them through the next battle and come out alive on the other side. And of those two, one of them was probably more qualified to be in his position than he was.
The one for whose life he really didn't want to be responsible. The one for whose life he was terrified of being responsible.
What was wrong with him? He didn't even know her. He'd only met her eight hours ago. How had he become so irrational over a single person in only eight hours' time?
How had he fallen so deeply for a single person in only eight hours' time?
He flopped over onto his stomach and folded his hands under his chin. No, he was being ridiculous. He hadn't fallen for her. It was impossible. You don't fall for someone at first sight. You can be intrigued by them, or even attracted to them. But you don't fall for them. You don't have an image of them emblazoned upon the very core of your being. It just doesn't happen. He must be overreacting. Maybe it was the pressures of commanding a squadron of pilots, or the stress of knowing that they needed to have another base lined up in case something went wrong here on Ithull. Or the strange isolation he sometimes felt as a result of his pursuit of the Force training he barely understood.
Or maybe it was because she was just so incredible. She was more than incredible. She was perfect. She was a great pilot, a beautiful woman, and a formidable presence in the base.
And, suddenly, she was in his room.
His head turned toward the door a split second after he heard it slide open. Lost in his thoughts, he hadn't sensed her approach. Yet, there she stood, leaning heavily on the doorframe, staring down at him.
"Have a headache, Commander?" she drawled.
She was also very drunk, from the looks of it. Her brown eyes seemed slightly glassy, and she was leaning more heavily than a person normally would unless they were intoxicated.
Luke sat up quickly, smacking his head on Wedge's bunk as he did so. He rubbed his sore head as he gazed up at her. "I do now," he grumbled.
She jerked her thumb toward the other room. "You're missing a great time."
"Deliberately engaging in an activity that is going to make me feel miserable in the morning isn't exactly my idea of a good time," he muttered, trying to keep his voice steady even as his heart raced in his chest.
"Many would argue with you," she replied moving unsteadily toward him.
Luke watched her nervously as she made her way toward the bunk and sat down rather ungracefully. He noted that she sat particularly close to him, and his heart nearly jumped out of his chest. Her proximity was having a somewhat profound effect on him at the moment, and he resolved not to look at her. Even drunk, she was beautiful. And somehow, she seemed more dangerous, though he didn't know why.
"So why aren't you still over there?" he asked while staring at his feet.
"Oh, you know," she laughed in her husky voice. "Too many men hanging around, hitting on me, trying to show me what studs they are. Gets rather annoying."
"You seemed to be enjoying it at dinner," he countered, a bit more sharply than he intended.
"Oh, I was," she said, leaning in closer. He could smell the alcohol on her breath, and he shuddered. That wasn't exactly the most attractive scent in the galaxy. "But maybe the person I wanted to have hitting on me wasn't in the room at the time," she continued.
He balked at that. He'd never expected such a comment from any female, least of all this new recruit who was now under his command. Could she possibly be more forward? Shocked at her unexpected comment, he looked at her in disbelief.
She, in turn, laughed. "That look was absolutely priceless!" she giggled. "Well worth the price of admission. Don't worry, Commander. I was only teasing."
Luke grimaced at the heavy scent of liquor that now hung very close to his face. "You are so drunk," he said with disgust.
Genna frowned at him. "And you are quite the prig, aren't you?"
Luke's eyes narrowed at her. "Excuse me?"
"Come on, have a little fun," she said. "Or are you above that, Lieutenant Commander Skywalker? Can't fraternize with us lesser beings in the lower ranks?"
Luke simply glared at her. He couldn't believe that this beautiful woman had so suddenly become an obnoxious drunkard.
"No, wait," she said giggling. "I know what it is. The guys were right: you're saving yourself for the Princess, aren't you?"
"What?" Luke cried, unable to hide his astonishment.
"Oh, that's just so adorable," she remarked, continuing to laugh. "It's a shame, though. We could have had something, you and I."
"You know," Luke began sharply, pointing a finger right in her face, "I don't know you that well, but I like you better sober."
"Didn't your mother ever teach you that it's rude to point?" she teased.
Luke tensed and looked away. "No."
"Well, she should have."
Inexplicably, Luke turned to her and snapped, "Considering I never knew her, that would have been difficult!" He looked back down at the floor, trying to swallow back the anger and hostility that seemed to be burning a hole in his chest. He could feel his jaw muscles tense, and he wondered why she had riled him so much. He also wondered why he hadn't been able to control his outburst. He'd been getting much better at that lately. Why had he snapped now?
Suddenly, he felt her hand on his arm. "Sith, I'm sorry," he heard her say. "I was only teasing you. I didn't know."
"It's all right," Luke replied tensely, and not very convincingly. He was still staring at the floor.
He heard and sensed Genna flop backwards on the bed with a sigh. "I guess I did kind of overdo it over there." When Luke remained silent, she continued. "I don't usually get this drunk. But, they kept offering me drinks, and I kept accepting. Kind of stupid, I know. But, hey, what can you do?"
"Tell them, 'No thanks'," answered Luke.
Genna laughed. "That won't get me a date, though."
"Well, neither will acting like a drunken jerk," he argued.
"Point taken," she sighed. "Although I'm usually not this bad. I'm probably not making that great an impression on you, am I?"
At that, Luke felt his lips twitch upward, threatening to form into a smile. Ironically, as drunk and obnoxious as she was right now, he was thankful for it. Before she had entered his room, he'd thought she was the perfect woman, and he'd been obsessed with that ideal. She was just as Leia had been when he first spotted the Princess on the Death Star, a dream girl. Now, however, like Leia and everyone else, Genna was clearly fallible. She was human. Somehow, he felt more at ease knowing that. He turned and looked at her. She was lying on her back, her black ringlets fanned out on the bunk. Looking up at him with her large brown eyes, she seemed just as apologetic as drunk. Softening, he did, then, smile at her.
"As your commanding officer, no," he finally commented.
"Damn," she groaned, turning her gaze upward to Wedge's bunk. "Guess I'll just have to show you up on the sims tomorrow."
Now it was Luke's turn to laugh. "With the hangover you're likely to have, I'd like to see you try."
Looking back at him, she propped herself rather unsteadily on one elbow. "Is that a challenge?"
Luke shook his head with a grin. "I don't make challenges to people who aren't apt to remember them in the morning."
She leaned in closer, "Well, then, since I'm not likely to remember this in the morning, as you suggest, can I ask you something?"
Luke arched is eyebrows dubiously. "What?"
"Do you think I'm a good pilot?"
Luke laughed. "You're a Rogue, now, aren't you?"
Genna pressed, "But am I good?"
Feeling more comfortable in her presence than he had since she'd arrived, he gently took her chin in his hand. "Judging from the sims, you're better than good."
She smiled at that, her alluring dimple reappearing on her cheek. "Thank you."
Luke frowned as he continued to hold her chin. "Why does that mean so much to you?"
In response, she flopped back down with a sigh. "Because that's all I have." She shut her eyes. "That's all I am," she added in barely a whisper.
A wistful smile crept upon his face. He knew what that was like. Growing up on Tatooine, the only thing he'd had to cling to was his ability to pilot. That was the one shining light in the dreariness he'd felt life in the desert to be. "I know what you mean," he replied softly.
Genna remained quiet. Too quiet, actually. Her breathing seemed regular and even, her lips slightly parted. Luke leaned forward. Had she fallen asleep?
"Genna?" he asked quietly.
No response.
Luke groaned. She had, indeed, fallen asleep. And while the thought of having a beautiful woman asleep in his bed was not exactly a nightmare, it did leave Luke with one problem. Where was he supposed to sleep? He was not quite ready to sleep in the same bed with a girl he'd just met, no matter how beautiful she was. Maybe he was priggish, like she'd said, but he wasn't about to do it anyway.
He saw that her legs were dangling over the edge, and he gently lifted them onto the bed and straightened her out. He grabbed the blanket from the foot of the bed and draped it over her, noting that she must have really had too much to drink to have passed out so thoroughly and quickly. Yes, she was definitely human. Beautiful, but human.
He gently reached over and brushed one of her curls away from her face. The touch was electric, but he resisted the urge to lean in and kiss her softly. That would have been a bit too silly and romantic. Instead, he smiled at the strange sensations that she had wrought in him and which were now coursing through his body, and went in search of a place to sleep for the night. And he knew he'd be teased about this in the morning.
************
Luke awoke in the middle of the night to the unpleasant sound of someone being very sick in the 'fresher. His instinctive desire to help and assist people in trouble kicked in before his sleepy brain did, and he swung his legs out of bed. The floor didn't meet him where he expected it to, and he fell. Hard. Pain brought him to full awareness in an instant as his foot twisted in what was definitely the wrong direction with a sickening snap. Why hadn't he remembered that he was sleeping in Wedge's bunk before he tried to get out of bed? His eyes watered as he bit down on his lip to keep from howling as he sank to the floor.
The horrible sound of retching continued from the 'fresher. Of course, now that he was fully awake but in no shape to offer any assistance, he knew exactly who was in there.
"You okay, Genna?" he asked in what irritatingly sounded like a whimper. He really needed to work on his ability to handle pain.
He was answered by the sound of more retching. Clearly, she wasn't okay. He'd been afraid something like this would happen.
Now what? He was stuck on the floor of the very dark room while a very beautiful woman was in obvious distress. He tried to get his good foot under him in order to pull himself off of the floor somewhat, and, using his own bunk as leverage, he managed to stand. The distance between his bunk and the 'fresher had never seemed so great. He bit his lip and tried a one-legged hop, but winced as the jarring movement sent pain radiating up his leg. The staggering intensity of it began to sap his strength, and he decided that crawling across the floor would probably be his best bet. Gratefully sitting down on the cold floor once again, he took a moment to collect himself as the throb in his ankle lessened somewhat. Then, planting his arms behind him, he scooted himself backwards on his rear toward the 'fresher.
Once by the door, he knocked on it and called, "Genna, how are you doing in there?"
Silence greeted him from the other side.
That worried him. "Genna, answer me."
In response, the fresher door opened, and a grey-faced Genna appeared standing shakily in the doorway. She looked bewildered as she replied, "I think I'm a little better, now that I've gotten that over with." She paused. "Where are you?"
"Down here," Luke called from the patch of floor by the door, bathed in the light of the 'fresher. When she looked down at him, he offered a slight wave and smile.
"What the blazes?" Genna asked, as she knelt down beside him. Her normally radiant brown skin was pasty and covered with beads of sweat, and her eyes showed that she was definitely dealing with one gigantic hangover. Yet, as awful as she must have been feeling, she clearly seemed more concerned about the young man who was sitting beside the 'fresher door instead of standing beside it.
"I was just checking to see if you're okay," he said innocently.
Genna frowned, puzzled. "Okay, I guess. My head may be a little out of sorts at the moment, but . . .can I ask why you're sitting on the floor?"
Luke gave a weak grin. "I think I broke my ankle," he explained lamely.
Genna ran a hand across her damp forehead. "Are you serious?"
Mortified beyond words, Luke nodded. "I forgot that I was sleeping on the top bunk."
"And you fell trying to get out, right?" Genna finished for him. "Force's sake, Luke, couldn't you have done this when I wasn't feeling miserable?"
"It's your fault," he countered, laughing in spite of his predicament.
"My fault?" Genna asked, confused.
"If you hadn't been so loud in there, I'd still be asleep," Luke explained. "Learn how to get sick quietly instead of waking up your roommates and making them get out of bed because they're concerned."
"What?"
"Hey, Wedge never woke me up, and that's one guy who knows the price of partying," Luke said, innocently.
"Wedge is normally your roommate, I take it?" she asked. When he nodded, she queried, "Well, where is he now?"
"Next door," Luke answered. "He did the same thing you did, passing out from the alcohol on someone else's bunk. There was a lot of that going on, from what I understand. I don't think Alliance Command is going to be all that happy in the morning."
"Yeah, well they're going to be even less happy when they find out you broke your ankle getting out of bed," Genna added with a wry grin.
Luke smiled sheepishly. "Well, I don't think it's actually broken. At least, I hope it isn't."
"Let's just see about that," Genna argued. Rising to her feet with a loud groan, she put one hand to her head and staggered to the light switch. The room was instantly flooded with light, and Genna squinted, moaning once more and swearing in several languages. She staggered back over to Luke and crouched down beside him.
Luke was suddenly very self-conscious. His chest was bare, as he was clad only in a pair of long sleeping pants. Crossing his arms to shield himself somewhat from her gaze, he realized that it could have been worse. He could have been wearing shorts.
Much to his relief, her gaze was focused squarely on his ankle. Luke glanced down at it as well, and he immediately wished he hadn't. His toes were badly discolored, and his ankle was already beginning to swell. Not to mention, it just didn't look quite right.
"Can you move your toes at all?" Genna asked.
Luke managed a slight shift of his big toe, but the pain it brought made him want to cry out. Refusing to show weakness in front of the woman seated beside him, he swallowed back the cry with an effort that threatened to bring tears to his eyes. He was saved from having to find his voice, however, when Genna spoke first.
"I'll take that as a 'no'," she remarked with a sympathetic grin.
Luke grimaced and spoke through a very tight throat, "So is it broken, you think?"
"Still not sure," Genna answered with a shrug. "And I don't want to be the one to mess with it to find out. It could just as well be a very bad sprain, but I'm a pilot, not a medic."
"So I hear," he commented dryly.
For a moment, he was afraid his words had been taken as an insult, for she seemed to pale once he'd said them. But then, she suddenly rose and crossed over him to the 'fresher once again. Frowning at the sounds that followed, Luke really felt sorry for her. Well, at least he wasn't the only one showing weakness.
"What exactly did you have to drink last night?" he ventured to ask once things had quieted down once more.
Genna groaned. "Distilled j'ykuga, I believe."
Luke shuddered. "Wonder where they picked that up. That stuff's harsh."
"You're telling me," Genna said, coming back out of the 'fresher to slump beside him. She was quite pale. "I've gotten sick on it before. Don't know what possessed me to drink it again."
"A shot at a date is what I believe you said last night," Luke teased.
Genna scowled, but was too weak to put any real venom behind it.
"So, now what?" Luke asked after a moment's silence. "We can call for a medic, and get the base all riled up with speculation over what happened. Or we can sit here and wait until someone wakes up and can help me over to the medcenter as discreetly as possible."
Genna shrugged. "Well, I could use a few painkillers, myself, right now. But I'd rather just sit here for a little bit. If you can hold out, that is?"
Luke nodded. "As long as I don't move, I can handle the throbbing. And I've got some painkillers in the chest at the foot of the bed, if you want them."
Genna could barely contain her relief. "Oh, yes! Thank you," she cried as she headed over to the chest he had indicated. Sure enough, there they were, and she gladly helped herself to a few. "But if you don't mind me asking, how did you manage a stash of painkillers?"
Luke smiled. "My friend, Han, lent them to me. Said you never know when you might need them."
Genna nodded. "Isn't that the truth!"
"Actually," Luke said sheepishly, "could you pass me a few?" He really didn't want to ask, but his ankle was actually hurting quite a bit, even though he was keeping it still.
Genna passed them over to him with a slight grin. "You want a pillow to go with that?"
He quickly popped the painkillers into his mouth and asked, "Huh?"
"To elevate your foot and keep it from swelling as badly," she explained in irritation, as though this were common knowledge all over the galaxy.
Luke blushed. "Uh, sure," he said, although she had already moved to grab the pillow.
"Lift your leg, and I'll slide the pillow under your foot," she instructed.
Luke did as instructed, although the pain of lifting his leg became so great she had to assist. Who would have thought that one little twist of the ankle could be so painful? He'd heard of people losing limbs and not batting an eye. Well, judging from how he was handling this, he was going to be a lot more careful with his appendages from now on.
Once Genna had maneuvered the pillow under his foot, she slumped down beside him against the wall. "Better?"
"That was supposed to make me feel better?" Luke asked incredulously.
Genna shrugged. "Like I said, I'm a pilot, not a medic."
Luke grinned at her and then tried to relax against the wall as she had done. This wasn't exactly his idea of spending a night with a beautiful woman, he mused, wondering what else could possibly happen on this rather awkward evening. After all, it was still several hours until dawn.
*******************
"That's a lie!"
"No, I swear," Luke laughed, looking down into the eyes of the woman whose head was pillowed on his lap. Unable to sleep due to their various pains and the awkwardness of the situation, they'd spent the last two hours talking about anything and everything. In the process, Genna had stretched out on the floor and placed her head upon his good leg to get a bit more comfortable. This, of course, suited Luke just fine. "It's the truth."
She shifted slightly, as though trying to gauge his sincerity. "You mean to tell me that the Empire is wasting all these resources searching the galaxy for a punk who got off a lucky shot?"
"Hey," Luke scowled defensively. "I wouldn't say it was lucky. That took some serious skill."
"Okay, farm boy," Genna teased. "So where did you pick up this 'skill,' as you call it? Dusting crops?"
Luke shook his head with a grin. "Natural talent. My father was a great pilot, so I guess I inherited it from him."
Genna was silent a moment. "You never met him, did you?" she finally asked in an odd tone.
Taken off-guard by the question, Luke stiffened. "How did you know?"
Genna shrugged her shoulders. The gesture was somewhat awkward in her current position. "I guess it was the way you said that just then. Kind of like the way I talk about my own dad. Never knew him either. Heard stories about him all the time from my mother and my uncle, but I never met him. He died right after I was born."
Luke frowned. "But your family talked about him?"
Genna looked at him incredulously. "Well, yeah. My mom always said how much she loved him. She always said that talking about him kept him alive for her somehow. And there were pictures of him all over the house when I was growing up." She paused for a moment, losing herself in memory. "You know, it's weird, but she would laugh at a funny story about him and seem like she was going to cry at the same time. I never really understood it, but it seemed to be her way of making sure I grew up with a strong sense of knowing both my parents, even though I only grew up with one."
Her words pierced Luke with a sudden sense of longing and regret. He hadn't grown up knowing either of his parents. He'd even been discouraged from asking questions about them. As a result, he knew next to nothing about his father and even less of his mother. It wasn't fair, he thought, shutting his eyes to the sudden rush of envy he now felt. Envy that he'd often felt throughout his life.
"Oh, stars, Luke," he heard Genna gasp suddenly, and he felt her head lift from his lap.
He opened his eyes to see what was wrong, afraid she was going to be sick again. Instead, she was staring at him with a look that very closely resembled pity. His stomach soured.
Not taking her eyes from him, she said, "I'm sorry. It must be the alcohol; it's making me dumb and stupid. I just realized, Luke, that you didn't know either of your parents."
Unable to stand the pathetic gaze she had fixed him with, he turned away. "No, I didn't."
"And here I am talking about my own family, not realizing what you must be feeling."
Luke couldn't help but laugh weakly, even as he stared at the floor. "Don't worry about it. I've had twenty years to get used to being an orphan, and Leia talks about her family on Alderaan all of the time."
There was a silence from Genna that stretched out for what seemed to be an eternity until Luke finally turned his head to look at her. He expected to see her still gazing at him with a sickening look of utter pity. What he saw was quite different.
Her features were tight and her eyes reflected a deep pool of pain that was welling within her. In a strained voice she whispered, "We all do."
Luke felt the blood drain from his face as the full import of her words hit him like a blow to the gut. "You're from Alderaan?" he finally managed. She didn't answer, but her face told him everything. "B-but, how?"
She snorted, a single tear attempting to work its way out of her left eye, even as she tried to appear indifferent. "Hey, we can't all look and act like the Princess Leia Organa, now."
Bemused, Luke could only stare at her, not knowing what to say.
Genna sighed, and continued, taking the pressure off of him to speak. "You thought I was Corellian, right? The whole ego thing? I'm kind of an enigma, I know. A 'peace-loving' Alderaanian who joins the Imperial Navy and then betrays them by joining the Rebellion after her homeworld is destroyed. What can I say? I've never been good with labels and titles. Hell, I've only been good at one thing in my whole life." She paused, tears welling up in her eyes as she tried to speak once more in a choked voice, "I believed it all, you know? All the lies, all the promises. After all, what else was I gonna' do? I was a young kid who could fly better than anyone I knew. So after I listened to a recruitment tape a couple hundred times, I enrolled in the Academy. 'Join the Ranks of the Proud,' etcetera, etcetera. And I was good! I made it! I was a girl and I made it! I graduated straight into the Imperial Navy, and I thought I had finally become someone I could be proud of." She broke off, a sudden, unexpected sob welling in her throat. "But what do you do when you find out that everything you believe in is a lie? That you've become part of something that destroys what it's promised to protect? That you were somehow a part of the deaths of millions? Your own family? Your whole world? What do you do when all you can feel is anger and hatred and self-loathing?"
Luke watched as she seemed to struggle with the emotions that were threatening to drown her, and he reached over to squeeze her hand in sympathy. His gesture didn't have the effect he intended, however. She flinched and jerked her hand away, hardening her expression and staring at him squarely in the eyes.
"You know what you do?" she asked, leveling her voice. "You plant a bomb on your own carrier and then go into hiding until the Rebel scouts find you!"
For a moment, Luke could only stare back at her in stunned silence. Her confession had completely taken him aback, and he wasn't sure how to process the information. Did she want him to think she was cold and vengeful? Did she want him to think that she was hurt and distraught enough to do anything in her power to right the wrongs of the Empire?
Did she want him to think that she was a murderer?
All of these thoughts raced through his mind as he stared into the eyes of the young woman he had come to know so intimately in the past seventeen hours. And yet he didn't think any of these things about her. In fact, he thought reflectively, she was much like himself.
Undaunted, he reached for her hand once more and gripped it tightly so that she couldn't pull it away. Without shifting his gaze from her eyes, he said quietly, "Or you fire a single shot that kills an entire space-station full of people."
They remained silent for a long space, as she seemed to be trying to reconcile his own words with what she had just revealed to him. Luke refused to take his eyes off of her, however.
Eventually, she spoke again. "I guess we're just a pair of dangerous criminals, then, aren't we?" Her face was emotionless, but Luke could feel the tension in her dissipate.
"Yeah," Luke agreed. "I guess, in a normal universe, we would be." He paused with a slight, soft grin. "But here, we're just another group of rebels."
Luke noted with satisfaction that the tension really did melt from her features then, and she smiled gently back at him. "That's quite true," she said, shifting her body to lean her head upon his leg once more. "And you know what else?"
"What?"
"We're going to be a couple of tired rebels in the morning," she replied, smiling up at him from his lap.
Luke chuckled. "Well, considering the circumstances, I think I'll probably be excused from duty tomorrow morning. Though, I'm not sure about you."
Genna's smile broadened, even though it held a hint of self-reproach. "I'm pretty sure they'll find me in no shape to do anything effective come daybreak.
"You and about two thirds of the pilots, from what I understand," Luke amended wryly.
Genna playfully smacked him in the chest in response. "Well, what kind of commander are you? Letting your men get drunk like that? You should be ashamed of yourself, Lieutenant Commander Skywalker?"
Luke rolled his eyes. "Not that again."
Genna responded with a soft laugh as she closed her eyes and relaxed upon Luke's lap. "You'd better just be happy that I have a really bad hangover right now."
Intrigued, Luke looked down at her and asked, "Why?"
"Because it got me to spend the night with you, didn't it?" she teased, opening one eye to look up at him. "I'm not usually so forward with commanding officers."
Luke laughed at that, partly out of true amusement and partly out of a self-conscious desire to mask the surge of feelings her brief comment had suddenly released through his body. "Well, I must admit that you are a much nicer looking roommate than Wedge," he teased back.
Genna grinned back at him, closing her eyes once more. "It's just a shame we're in such bad shape right now. We could have had a lot of fun this evening."
Luke shrugged. "I don't know. I've actually enjoyed getting to know you like this, as strange as that may seem."
Genna opened her eyes again, and furrowed her brows at him. "You're right, that is strange," she remarked, with a glance that told Luke she thought he was absolutely insane. "I mean, what could be more fun than you twisting your ankle and me carving a path in the floor to the 'fresher while nursing a killer headache?" Then her gaze softened. "But, to be brutally honest, I think I kind of enjoyed it, too." She closed her eyes again and laughed. "What kind of sicko does that make me?"
"Dunno." Luke looked down and stared at her relaxed features for a moment. With her head resting on his leg and her hair fanned out across his pants, she was absolutely beautiful. Her soft, brown skin beckoned to be touched, and Luke found it hard to resist. In fact, he was suddenly finding several urges hard to resist, including the irrational desire to lean forward and kiss her beautiful lips. Resolving to keep his hands and lips to himself, he pulled his gaze away from her and shut his own eyes. Willing himself to relax as he leaned against the wall, he realized that he was actually quite sleepy. Genna seemed to have succumbed to her own tiredness, as her head was growing heavier against his leg. Sighing softly, he added, "I guess I'll just have to get back to you in the morning."
Within seconds, he was asleep.