Chapter Twenty Three

She was falling, crumpling, breaking down before his very eyes. It hadn't been Manticore to do it to her, it was him. He got that.

She'd been able to cope for twelve years by burying it. He wouldn't let her. Kept shoving it in her face over and over again in just a few days time. Watching her spiral, pushing her to the brink, there were a whole slew of terms to describe the rapid change in moods. How her smile had frozen and her words had been perfectly formed telling him she was going to put clothes on. Wall erected, words detached…

'What the hell was he doing to her?' He asked himself as he rubbed the baby's back through the towel, the towel she had wrapped him in. He'd seen something in her eyes as she'd heard him cry…The same thing he'd seen in her eyes after a nightmare…Worry, panic, fear.

There were two clear outcomes to this, Max either finally fell apart or she accepted Will, like he could swear he saw she wanted to sometimes. It was there in her eyes, just out of reach…

He knew he was doing what Krit thought was best, albeit not as fast as Krit wanted. Even Bling wouldn't have said to just hand the baby off to strangers (if that had ever even been a viable option), Bling hadn't let him run from his problems (despite his best attempts to) he certainly wouldn't let Max either.

Logan was just clinging though, clinging to what he'd once known for sure about Max, something so basic and fundamental that he seriously doubted less than three months in hell could have changed that, not that her time in hell had finished once they'd gotten her out. He wasn't stupid, he got that.

Just clinging and waiting to see the outcome, he had no ability to gauge any progress they were making, two steps forward, three steps back, one step forward…hold it…hold it, two steps back, three steps forward…

He groaned almost noiselessly. He'd never wanted someone so much to just tell him what to do as he did in this moment.

He realized then that Will was already fast asleep once more. He made his way back over to the bassinet, slowly, tentatively since he only had one hand and maneuvering the chair with one hand wasn't exactly the easily thing to do. Bling had forced that information into his head early on when he was pushing himself, forced him to hold a hand to his chest and showed him just how much more difficult his life could be.

The baby stirred as Logan bent over to grab a new sleeper from underneath the bassinet and wasn't particularly pleased as limbs were maneuvered to fit into the outfit. He loved Bling in the moment that followed as he'd never loved the man before as he realized the bassinet was actually at the height where he could put the baby back down even though he was in his chair. He hadn't even noticed that in bed, probably because he'd been half asleep.

Max walked back out into the room wearing short little gray and black plaid shorts and a fitted black tank, part of what she frequently referred to as 'living with Logan clothing.' The fitted, matching shorts and tanks were as close to what Original Cindy and Kendra deemed appropriate pajamas/loungewear since they couldn't get her into any slinky nighties. The fact that he'd repeatedly pointed out he could care less what Max wore was always ignored.

She was already seemingly calm once more as he moved towards her. "We should keep you in this permanent state of undress," she smiled taking in his body.

He chuckled and looked down at himself, still clad in only the white towel, sometimes it was nice to be appreciated and the last thing he was going to do was fight her on it.

"We really should take advantage of you already being undressed roaming around the apartment, normally this is my job," she continued to smile with a tilt of her head, hoping that peeping tom Logan always envisioned was getting a few nice shots of him.

An eyebrow raised, 'Again?' it asked

"You're not getting old on me are you, Logan?" She asked going right for the belt in true Max form, knowing there was no way in hell he'd stand for that. "Maybe those wrinkles are coming back," she smirked as she leaned in to inspect the area around his eyes she'd almost permanently aged the previous summer.

He pulled down the hand that was tracing the area and pulled her in for a kiss, skipping the comeback, "Old?" he asked once he released her.

"Kisses are nice but-"

He pulled her in and caught her off balance, okay well what Max knew was meant to catch her off balance and she was pulled into his lap.

"That means you're done working for the evening right?" she asked once he finally released her.

His lips smirked, definitely a form of work he had in mind.

She laughed, "You know what I mean."

"I'm all yours," he said raising a hand up to her cheek and looking deep into her eyes.

"I love those words," she said with anticipation in her eyes.

"And I love you," he responded as he stroked her cheek once more suddenly needing to say the words, explaining why he was doing this, putting her through this.

"I love you too Logan," she said gently, wondering how the hell she got so lucky. "So you carrying me in or what?" she asked with a nod towards their room, things had definitely turned out poorly for them before on the chair.

He was about to start wheeling off when he realized the baby was still in living room, "Will," he said with a nod towards the bassinet.

"Right," she responded with a nod and moved off him.

Logan noted as he followed behind her that her gaze never once flickered downwards. And three steps back…here they go again.

-o-o-o-

She didn't fall asleep upon his chest, the baby awoke again before they actually dozed off and she didn't make the move back into his arms. Instead she stayed sideways facing him, her eyes centered squarely on him and never wavering down towards the crib. His mind searched for something to say as their eyes remained connected. Something to reassure her, he'd said everything though; countless times he'd said it all. Promises of he'd never leave, promises of Manticore not getting her again. Both were things he couldn't promise, he couldn't promise his safety or her own anymore than he could guarantee the safety of her siblings, which they'd proven wasn't a sure thing anymore. So he just reached out a hand and let his thumb trace her jaw and repeated the words he made sure to say to often, "I love you."

She nodded and moved in closer to him then fell asleep in his embrace.

Yup sorry, repetitive. Kinda had to force it upon you since Logan's living through it. Drama once more though in the next chapter. Thanks for reading guys.

Oh and I just need to say idlehands, you've been amazing with the replies lately. I just wanted to thank you for that, you've totally kept me encouraged and energized.