Warring Emotions

by Henka

Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does. Love is a battle, love is a war love is a growing up. Brucas, Naley, & Jeyton. The sequel to This Time Around.

4. Tangled

Warring Emotions

By: Sari

Disclaimer: One Tree Hill is not mine. If I had enough money I'd probably buy it just so I could get rid of half the characters on the show.

Summary: "Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does. Love is a battle, love is a war; love is a growing up." - James Baldwin. The sequel to This Time Around.

4: Tangled

I'm full of regret

For all the things that I have done and said

And I don't know if it'll ever be ok to show

My face around here

Sometimes I wonder if I disappear

Would you ever turn your head and look

See if I'm gone

Cause I fear

"Peyton."

"Jake." She replied stubbornly. "Only 2 AM? I thought you'd be out later. Must have just went for a quickie right?"

"Peyton stop." Jake said a warning tone slipping into his voice. "Don't go there."

"Why not?" She said laughing. "It's true isn't it? You went over there and slept with her."

Jake closed his eyes painfully. "That's not what happened."

"No?" Peyton said raising an eyebrow. "So then you two were fighting passionately and all of a sudden she tripped and fell on your dick? Explain it to me Jake because I don't think I understand."

"Peyton." Jake said calmly. "I didn't mean for it to happen. It just did."

She smiled bitterly. "Like the time you screamed her name out when we were having sex? That was just an accident too?"

"If you love her so damn much why are still back here explaining this shit to me?" Peyton asked. "Just stay with her and leave me the hell alone."

"I can't do that." He said simply. "I love you."

"But not like you love her." Peyton finished. "I get it Jake, I know you better than anyone."

"If you tell me to stay I will." He said finally, breaking their staring match.

"So I can feel guilty because I'm hurting you and her. No I've had enough of feeling guilty in my lifetime." She said scornfully. "Run along to Kali, you're free."

"I'm not going to leave like this." He said. "You're hurt and angry…and it's my fault."

"OF COURSE IT'S YOUR FAULT." She screamed. "YOU FUCKED HER AND THEN CAME BACK HERE EXPECTING ME TO BE HAPPY ABOUT IT."

He flinched and looked down. "That's not what I'm asking for Peyt. I didn't ask to feel this way about Kali! It'd make everything simpler if I felt that way about you but damn it I don't. No matter how hard I try to forget her I can't."

Peyton let out an embarrassed sob. "I was waiting for you to say that." She said sadly. "I've been waiting a year and half to hear you say those words and now that you've said them I don't know what to do."

"Oh god Peyt…" Jake said sitting by her on the bed and wrapping his arms around her. "I am so sorry."

"It sucks when you love someone so much and they can never love you back." She said sobbing. "And I want to hate you and I want to blame you but I can't because I fucking knew this would happen! I'm the asshole that stayed with you when I knew you were in love with her."

"I want to make this easier for you." Jake said helplessly. "But I can't…I don't know how."

"Leave." Peyton said pulling away from him. "Go back to Kali."

"You're going to be okay?" He asked.

She laughed bitterly. "Eventually I will be." She said.

"Peyt, I do love you." He whispered.

"Stop saying that." She ordered. "Because you don't. If you did you wouldn't be doing this."

"I'm sorry." He muttered pathetically.

Peyton watched him find his suitcase and leave before breaking down completely. Fumbling for her phone she dialed back Anna. "I lost before it even began." She managed to get out.

"He broke up with you?" Anna said surprised. "Jake's too much of a wuss to do that."

Peyton laughed. "You're right he is a wuss, I had to push him out the door."

"You dumped him?" Anna asked in amazement. "Damn Peyton I'm proud of you."

"Yeah, me too." She said softly.

There is nothing left to say to you

That you wanna hear

That you wanna know

I think I should go

The things I've done are way too shameful

Kali groaned as someone flipped the light switch to the kitchen. She must have cried herself to sleep on the kitchen floor after reading Jake's note. "What the hell…who's there?"

"What the hell happened to you?" Adam asked concerned. He pulled her up and sat her on the counter, handing her a wet paper towel to wiper her face with. "You look like someone came here and died in front of you."

She gestured to the dry erase board. "Jake was here."

"The infamous Jake that is keeping you from getting with me Jake?" Adam asked peering at the note. "You slept with him?"

"And then he left."

"To go break it off with his girlfriend?"

She shrugged. "All I know is that he referred to it as a mistake and there was too much in the way for anything to happen. So I guess all it was to him was a goodbye fuck." She said bitterly.

Adam raised an eyebrow. "Isn't he like some type of saint?"

"Guess not." She walked into her bedroom. "Put on some coffee for me?" She called back. "And answer the door if anyone comes."

"You got it."

Kali closed the door and sighed against it. Adam Mcafferty had helped her through a lot when she first met him. Still reeling from Jake's coldness and lack of contact they had struck up an easy friendship because of their similar majors and it had quickly developed into something more. The something more being a one night stand, but even that hadn't ruined their friendship. It had just made them closer. And Kali knew that he was quite possibly in love with her. He put up with too much of her shit not to be but she didn't want to go into a relationship with him if she knew she was still longing for Jake.

So they were just friends, much to his chagrin.

Kali took a shower and washed her face before getting started on reapplying her makeup. Mentally she strengthened herself for the day. Another confrontation with the friends was coming up. They were going for breakfast. She was starting to despise ever coming up with the stupid idea of a reunion. She didn't think she could last a week of smiling in Peyton's face knowing that she was the person in the way of her and Jake's relationship.

She'd probably break her neck—or something along those lines.

"Adam I don't smell any…" She broke off eyes widening at the person Adam was talking to you.

"Hey Kali, I was just about to come and get you." Adam turned to Jake. "What was your name again…?"

"I didn't tell you." Jake replied coldly. "But it's Jake."

Adam's turned wide eyes on Kali. "Oh. Well then, I'll be in the kitchen."

"What are you doing here?" Kali asked. "Why aren't you begging for Peyton's forgiveness?"

"We broke up." His eyes wandered over to the kitchen area. "You didn't tell me you had a boyfriend."

"It's not like you could do anything." Kali said mocking his earlier words. "I was a mistake and a complication Jake, go back to Peyton." She looked down. "He's not my boyfriend."

"So did you just call him after I left?" He asked angrily.

Kali's eyes widened and then narrowed. "How dare you insinuate that I'm a slut?" She growled. "Get the hell out of here Jake, I don't want to talk to you and I sure as hell don't want to see you."

"Jesus Kali, did last night mean nothing to you?" Jake asked incredulously. "Why are you acting like this?"

"I don't know Jake" She started sarcastically. "Maybe it's because you had sex with me, left me some lame ass excuse about it not working and the night was so special but you still had to go run home to Peyton, and then came back the next morning expecting me to jump back in your arms. You were right on the first count Jake, last night was a foolish mistake. We shouldn't have gone from a year and a half of broken promises and silence to jumping in the sack it just doesn't work like that."

"I know we rushed, and we shouldn't have. It wasn't my intention to get you into bed."

She nodded. "I got that" She said softly. "But we can't just pick up things where we left off Jake, we have to take it slow."

"I can do that, as long as you can promise me that there is an us."

"I can't promise that." Kali said regretfully. "But I can promise to try."

Jake nodded. "I'll take what I can get."

You're just an innocent

A helpless victim of a spider's web

And I'm an insect

Going after anything that I can get

Nathan smiled broadly as he saw the pretty, almond-eyed woman search the airplane terminal for him. At first he had thought it was a mistake to invite Madison to the reunion with him but now that she was here he couldn't be happier he suggested it. If Madison was around he could at least keep his mind off of Haley, and if he slipped he knew Madison would catch him. She was perhaps the most understanding girl he had ever known.

"Hey baby!" Madison called making her way through the crowd toward him. "Wow, I've never been to New York before this is so awesome!"

He grinned. "It's not too bad, I've been here a couple times."

"I know, you've told me in detail about every time." She said playfully. "How was the get together?"

"Tense." Nathan said shrugging. "It was a given you know, with how everyone left each other senior year."

"I keep hearing about this infamous senior year." Madison said rolling her eyes. "You guys should make a story about your lives or something, it's impossible to have that much drama in such a small group of people."

"Hey, you're apart of the drama now too, so don't get all snobbish."

She kissed his cheek. "Whatever Nate, so what about this breakfast that I'm being forced to attend? Are we going straight there?"

He nodded. "Your plane came in too late for us to go by the hotel and then make it back to the restaurant by 10."

"Fine with me, is the place nearby?" She asked climbing into Nathan's rental car.

He nodded concentrating on the busy New York streets. Soon enough they were stuck in mid-morning traffic and Madison had dozed off leaving him to wonder about their relationship once again. He had been doing that a lot lately, another result of running into Haley. Madison had become his best friend and lover while away in Miami, she was in so many ways his rock—the person that kept him grounded he knew that they could last—if he'd just forget about Haley.

Fat chance of that happening.

Pulling into a parking space he shook Madison awake and both of them made their way into the fancy restaurant that Kali had picked for the breakfast.

"So where are they?" Madison asked anxiously. "And is Haley there? I have to prepare myself you know."

"Stop worrying, they'll love you." He pointed towards the back where a private area had been set up. "There they are. The blonde boy is my brother Lucas, the brunette next to him is Brooke, and the redhead across from them is Haley. I guess the others haven't gotten here yet."

"God she's gorgeous, I should just concede defeat now." She said grimacing.

"Hey." He commanded. "I'm with you, not her."

"Not by choice." She muttered.

Nathan chose to ignore that comment and walked over to the booth where his friends where sitting. "Hey guys."

"Hey Nate!" Lucas said happily. "I was starting to think you weren't going to show. Who's this lovely lady you have here?"

"This is Madison Lee, my girlfriend. Madison this is Lucas, Haley, and Brooke." He said.

Madison smiled weakly and sat down besides Nathan. "It's a pleasure to meet all of you. I've heard so many things."

"Not bad I hope." Lucas said good naturedly.

She shook her head. "Nathan speaks really well of all of you." She assured him.

"That's a surprise." Brooke piped up. "We weren't on the best of terms the last time we saw him."

"And I apologize for that." Nathan said looking at Lucas. "I was a dick to blame you for all that shit back then."

Lucas waved away the apology. "Don't worry about it, you were going through a lot. I understand."

"Thanks Luke, that means a lot."

Lucas just nodded and smiled brightly changing the subject. "So Madison what do you do?"

"I'm a bartender actually." She said blushing. "I go to UM for Music Theatre."

"Music Theatre?" Haley asked surprised. "Do you want to be in the music business?"

Madison nodded. "Music is my passion. I'm hoping to either become a song-writer/singer or just become like a talent coach or something. Anything will do really, as long as I'm entertaining or help to bring up a new entertainer."

"That's really ambitious of you." Lucas said impressed. "But the real question is: are you any good?"

"Lucas!" Brooke scolded.

Nathan grinned. "Trust me when I say she's amazing."

Madison blushed again swatting at Nathan's arm. "I'm okay." She said humbly.

"Madison's doing a show up here." Nathan added. "That's is one of the reasons I invited her. How about I get all of us tickets?"

"That'd be great." Lucas said enthusiastically. "And here comes the rest of our party, late as usual."

Nathan looked up seeing a very tense Peyton, Kali, and Jake walking through the door. "That looks like trouble." He muttered.

"Why?" Madison asked confused.

Lucas laughed. "You see the platinum blonde? That's Kali she used to date Jake, the dark haired guy, and he's currently dating Peyton, the curly-haired blonde."

"Oh I see, love triangle?"

"You got it in one."

"Ouch." Madison said wincing. "I suddenly feel as if this breakfast is going to be very interesting."

"Couldn't have said it better myself." Brooke said raising an eyebrow at Peyton's appearance and the obvious tension between the three people approaching them.

And I've done you so wrong

Treated you bad

Strung you along

Oh, shame on myself

I don't know how I got so tangled

Brooke and Lucas finally made their escape outside the building with the excuse that they needed some privacy. To wolf whistles and cat calls they left the restaurant and both sighed in relief as they stepped out into the chilly streets of New York. The tension between Peyton, Jake, and Kali was so thick it was suffocating them not to mention the secret glances Haley and Nathan were giving each other whenever Lucas or Brooke managed to engage Madison in conversation.

"Damnit, inside there is like high school all over again." Lucas muttered rubbing his cold hands together. "I'm counting down until one of us snaps and tells everyone to fuck off."

Brooke nodded cracking a small smile. "Something happened between Peyton, Jake, and Kali and I think I know what it is."

"Jake broke up with Peyton to get back with Kali." Lucas guessed. "It's obvious because Peyton's upset but trying not to show it…"

"And Jake and Kali are uncomfortable." Madison's soft voice broke in. "Sorry to interrupt, it was getting kind of stuffy in there for me."

Brooke smiled apologetically at her. "We're not usually like this."

Lucas rolled his eyes. "Yeah, we really are. The rare moments of peace and unity in our bunch is fake and should be taken with a grain of salt."

"If it's so bad between all of you why bother to even try?" Madison asked.

Brooke sighed looking through the window at her friends. "Because these people are my family. They helped me become who I am today and I owe it to myself and to them to try one more time."

Lucas nodded. "What Brooke said."

Madison smiled weakly catching the looks going between Brooke and Lucas. "What?"

"Do you know about anything that went on between Haley and Nathan?"

"Every last bit of it." Madison said. "And I know he still loves her."

"Then why…?" Brooke started to ask.

"If he wants to go back to her then he can." Madison said. "I care about Nate a lot and I just want him to be happy even if it isn't with me. He's a good guy and he deserves it."

Lucas looked at her compassionately. "This must suck for you."

She shrugged. "I went through something like this a while back and my boyfriend then wasn't as understanding. I know what it feels like to be in love with someone but have too many obstacles in the way. If he could get through that and get back to Haley then I'd be happy for him."

"Thank you…for understanding."

Madison nodded and looked back through the window where Nathan and Haley were laughing at some secret joke. "I just wish this wasn't so hard."

Lucas smiled sadly and hugged her. "You're a good person Madison, it'll all work out in the end."

And I've done you so wrong

Treated you bad

Strung you along

Oh, shame on myself

I don't know how I got so tangled

TBC

Music Credits: Maroon 5 – Tangled

A/N: The couples for this fic are as followed: Brucas, Naley, and Jeyton. Sorry Kali/Jake fans, but they aren't meant to be. Yes, Madison is going to play a big part in this story and unknowingly cause some trouble between Brucas and Naley but all will end happily.