Title: Goodbye is the Saddest Word
Author: GEM
Feedback: Please send it good or bad written: 5/27/05
Rated: T
Word count:
Story Timeline: Pre- Mini
Category: Drama/Angst
Focus: The Adamas and Kara with some minor OFC's
Warnings: Character Death
Summary: We all react differently to the death of loved ones.
Spoiler: Slight Mini and Act of Contrition
Chapter 4: My Responsibility
Word traveled fast to the flight school and the rest of the base. Kara did her best to continue to teach her combat tactics class, but her mind was wandering. Zac was training for a new mission. The accident that occurred was during his shift.
She wasn't feeling well. Her heart was pounding and her stomach was in a knot. The class could see the crash sight from the window. . The flames were still burning and she knew there was no way anyone could survive a crash like that.
She finished the class and dismissed them to their flight simulation instructors. She gathered up her charts and books and began to walk out of the room. She had a break before her afternoon flight runs.
"Lieutenant Thrace." A dark haired officer met her at the door.
Kara quickly transferred her books to the other arm and saluted her superior "Colonel Terry."
He gestured to the empty room. "May I have a word?"
Kara heart skipped a beat at his tone and the knot in her stomach tightened. She placed the books down on the desk and sat down. "Kara, the accident this morning seems to be preoccupying you. Why?"
"I'd rather not say sir. If you don't mind." Her eyes were turned down to the floor and her voice was small.
"Kara, please look at me." Mark Terry broke rank and began talking to his flight instructor, pilot to pilot.
Kara looked at him Her eyes told a story he already knew. "I got a call a little while ago. A doctor Myers at the base hospital was looking for you."
Kara's eyes began to well up and her breathing became rigid. She knew after hearing that name that her life would change forever. She and Zac did their best not to make their relationship common knowledge. She was his instructor, if not directly now, at some point. Their relationship, in the strict sense of regulations was forbidden. Major Erin Myers was a close personal friend of Zac's family, a second mother of sorts- Zac's Godsmother in truth. She along with a small circle of family was the only one that knew about them. Zac hadn't told the Major; he had told "Aunt" Erin. If anything happened to Zac and Erin knew about it; she would pass word along to Kara.
Kara collected herself and asked the question she didn't really want to. "Mark, What did the message say?"
Mark looked sympathetically at Kara Thrace. "No one could survive an accident like the one this morning, Kara.
Tears began to form in her eyes. "I need to know."
First, I know about you and Zac that's why I'm concerned and here for you. Second, Doctor Myers sent me a message. Zac was a member of the mission group that went up this morning.
Kara Collapsed into his arms as the full force of what he was saying hit her. Zac was dead. Mark Terry held her as she cried. "I'm so sorry, Kara. There was nothing they could do."
Her life was over. She gambled with his life and lost. Her life was over. If she had shown enough courage and had the chops to stand up for what was right. She would have told him 'No, you can't do this. You're going to get yourself killed.' She was his instructor. His commanding officer, that was her job. He was her responsibility.
If she had done this he would still be an officer, a damn good one, and he would be alive. He would be sitting in this dark room with her drinking this bottle of ambrosia, with her. Instead she passed him. He became a pilot and she would have to grieve alone, in solitude, because no one knew about them. She would stand alone and cry alone, because she passed him. He was never coming back because she passed him.