Title: Goodbye is the Saddest Word

Author: GEM

Feedback: Please send it good or bad written: 6/1/05

Rated: T

Word count:

Story Timeline: Pre- Mini

Category: Drama/Angst

Focus: The Adamas and Kara with some minor OFC's

Warnings: Character Death

Summary: We all react differently to the death of loved ones.

Spoiler: Slight Mini and Act of Contrition

A/N: Thank You to all my wonderful reviewers. Remember to Read and Review. I like to hear your feedback. There is one more chapter after this we are almost done. Hope you enjoy this chapter.

Chapter 14: Fury

Kara stood next to Bill Adama tears threatening to fall from her eyes 'it's all my fault, I'm sorry. It's all my fault we're here. You passed by the skin of your teeth but you passed, Zac.' Her mind was going wild. She must not have been covering her discomfort well because as Kara took another deep breathe and wiped the new tears away from her eyes; Bill reached over and took her hand in his. It was, she decided as much as gesture of comfort for her as it was for him.

The Chaplin continued to speak about meeting again and then they asked if anyone would like to step forward and say a few words. Lee stepped forward and reflected on Zac's life in a way that Kara knew that Zac would be proud. The service was closed with a final prayer and then the present order was given. Kara stood at attention and saluted as did everyone present in the military. As the first shot was fired, Kara flinched, her breath was caught in her throat, and the tears began to fall this was their final goodbye.

---

Everyone gathered around the family at the end of the service. After shaking the hand of the Colonial Chaplin, Bill returned to were Kara was standing and talking to Lauren Myers

"Ladies."

"Sir." Wildcard saluted. "Sorry, Sir. I do it out of habit."

"Fine Lauren. It's not a problem. I want to thank you for what you did today. I know it wasn't easy for you. " His heart was caught in his throat as he continued. "The days have been difficult for all of us."

"It was the least I could do Sir." Lauren response was a mere whisper.

Adama stepped forward grasping her shoulder and kissing her on the forehead. I'll see you in a few days, Wildcard."

"Yes, Sir." Adama walked away deep in his own thoughts and Lauren turned her attention back to Kara Thrace. Lauren read the question written in her face.

"He keeps to himself. He's always been like that. when he's ready he'll let you in. You mean a lot to him Kara. How are you holding up?"

"Not so well." Kara said as she looked over at the casket, the tears began to flow freely

Lauren was quick to put a supportive arm around her "He'll live on Kara, as long as we remember him. He'll always be alive in us. He wouldn't want you to…"

Kara wiped the tears from her eyes "I know…. But …I can't I miss him so much." Kara was once again overcome by emotions Lauren led her away from the family gathered so she could collect herself.

They sat under a tree for a few minutes so Kara could calm down. "I really should go express my condolences

Lauren looked over and smiled "She's been asking for you the last couple of days." Lauren stood up and brushed off her uniform. She then extended a hand to Kara who gratefully took it and stood herself. "I told her you were being well taking care of."

"So that's how his old man found me."

"It wasn't me." Lauren smiled. "He asked your C.O."

Kara slapped her on the arm.

"What was that for?"

"You, threw me to the old man without as much as an introduction. I didn't even know him until the beginning of this week."

"Hey, he's easy to get to know. He's a lot like Zac… " 'Stupid, Wildcard. Why would you say that to her now?'

"I don't mind you bringing it up. You're right I feel as if I known him for years. He's the father I never had.

Lauren and Kara made their way back to the family surrounding Caroline Adama. It was then that Kara saw Lee for the first time.

"I'm so sorry, Kara. If you need anything?"

"Thanks Lee. I'll be okay though Zac wouldn't have wanted it any other way."

Lee offered her a short hug. "You're right."

Kara looked to both Lee and Lauren "If you, two will excuse me." Lee and Lauren both nodded as Kara walked over toward Caroline.

----

"She seems to be doing well." Lee said as they watched her walk away.

"Your father seems to giving her a lot of support." Lee put his arms around Lauren and embraced her tightly. "Love you."

She smiled "I love you too. How are you holding up?"

"I'm fine. I have something I have to do. Would you stay with Mom?"

Lauren knew that tone very well and turned around in his arms. "Don't do anything you'll regret do you hear me!"

He leaned down and kissed her softly on the lips. "Loud and clear." He whispered in her ear. He let go and started to walk away.

----

Lee finally found his father and walked up to him his back was turned away from Lee "Must be nice." Lee's voice was cold and seething with anger.

"Excuse me?" His father turned to face him.

"I said it must be nice. You finally got your way."

Bill's voice was even "Lee, you're upset. You don't want to have this conversation now."

Lee took a step closer to him. "No, now is exactly the time." His temper was beginning to boil up. "You got your way. He became a pilot; you killed him. You killed me! You killed Mom! I can forgive you for certain things but not this. Never for this."

He was ready to sit in that cockpit Lee. He had the best training; Kara was the one who trained him or have you forgotten." Bill voice was beginning to rise in intensity.

Lee did his best not to laugh out loud he actually felt like screaming 'She was sleeping with him at the time.' But he thought better of it. Lee was so angry with him he had trouble put his thought into words.

---

Kara walked away from the crowd surrounding Caroline Adama. Lee was nowhere to be found, neither was his father. She finally found them. All she had to do was follow the sound of their raised voices.

"It was an accident that you caused! You used to lecture us every time you came home about how important it was to be a viper pilot. Well, we did! Zac took those lectures to heart and got himself killed! You were the reason for that old man. You are the reason I have to listen to my mother scream in agony every night when she closes her eyes!" Lee was furious, "It's your fault! You're the one who pushed him to fly!"

"I've lost a son, Lee or have you forgotten." Adama's voice was cold.

Lee eyes looked like ice as he stared down his father "He was my brother." Lee emotions were beginning to give way.

----

"Lauren, have you seen Lee?"

"Not for a while." Lauren sat down beside her and took her hand in comfort as people continued to offer condolences.

Caroline turned to Lauren Myers. "Lauren, I'm afraid Lee is taking this rather hard. I been so consumed in grief I haven't had as much time as I'd like to listen to him. I'm afraid he may try to take it out on his father. He blames him for what happened to Zac, for Zac becoming a pilot

'Oh, gods' Lauren thought to herself. The conversation they had before playing in her head.

"Lauren, Please try and find him. I would prefer he wouldn't do anything that he would regret. He needs his father, even if he thinks he doesn't. He may not have been the model father but Bill is still family.

Lauren got up and walked away at a quick pace once she was far enough away from the crowd she broke into a run. She stopped quickly soon after when she found Kara hiding behind a tree Lauren came up and stood next to her. They both watched as the two men in question were having a heated discussion.

Kara hoped Lee wouldn't take this conversation too far.

"It was an accident, Lee!" Adama said for a second time trying to say something to get through to his Son.

"An accident that killed my brother! An accident that never would have happened if you'd been a father, and opened your eyes!"

'No Lee, don't play that card.' Kara thought, as she watched from a distance.

"I never wanted to see you again! You killed him! You're not my father! You killed him! Lee was screaming so loud at his Dad it was amazing no one else heard. Lauren and Kara stood behind the trees in pure shock. Lee fell to the ground in pure frustration and exhaustion.

Adama tried to offer his son help but he pushed him away. "Lee if this is what you want. I'll go but remember you will always be my son. I will always be here for you."

Lee looked up at his father with dark eyes. "Go Away!" He started to get up using the near by tree Lauren and Kara were standing behind. Adama walked away broken hearted.

"Oh my Gods." Both Lauren and Kara whispered to each other.

"Caroline was afraid of this. She sent me to find him before…" Lauren's speech drifted off.

Kara put a hand on her shoulder "Well, You found them. We were just a little late the damage I am afraid is done. Speaking of which I should go find Bill." Lauren gave Kara a sad smile as they both went their separate ways.

Kara looked back at Lauren and motioned to Lee "Good Luck." Kara watched for a moment as Lauren walked over and helped Lee to his feet. She took him in her arms and began to talk to him. 'Men, they always have to be right. Well, Apollo, my boy you're wrong. It's not your Dad's fault it's mine.' Kara walked away from the scene 'Now, we'll be picking up the pieces until the end of the world.'