Phase Three, in which- What do you mean, SCHOOL?
"School?" It was a soggy Thursday morning and Zelda and Link were sitting across from one another at the circular table, mouths open, staring at Impa with equal expressions of horror.
"That's right," replied Impa. "There are three weeks left of summer vacation, so we should probably go buy you new school things and register Zelda."
"But... but…" Link protested, while Zelda mouthed wordlessly in horror.
Link's lower lip quivered. "I don't want to go!" he finally wailed. "Don't make meeeeeee!"
"It's your junior year," added Impa. "This time next year, you'll be on the home stretch, and senior year is the easiest year of them all."
Quietly, Zelda had set down her fork and stared at the place mat, looking rather green. Wordlessly, she stood from the table and proceeded silently out of the kitchen, to the amazement of Impa and Link.
"Well," said a startled Impa once Zelda had left. "She's never done that before, has she?"
"Nope."
Mother and son engaged in a silent debate for a moment, and finally, Link stood.
"I'll go see," volunteered Link. "I need to call up the crew anyway and arrange a party."
"Right."
Link walked out of the kitchen and down the hall, then up the grand spiraling stairs and down the hall to Zelda's bedroom. He pressed his ear to the door; there was silence within. Lightly, Link knocked, but there was no reply. Silently, he opened the door and stepped in.
Zelda was sitting on her bed, staring out a large window at the ocean, facing away from Link. She was listening to something on her MP3 player, plucking lightly at the strings of the bass guitar that lay on her lap.
"Zel?"
She made no move to turn to face him, nor did she acknowledge that he was even in the room. However, when he walked over to her and silently sat down next to her, she showed no surprise.
"What if everybody hates me?" she finally murmured, her voice piteously quiet. Link could have laughed of relief, but instead kept his smile within him and put an arm around her. "I don't know how to make friends."
"They won't. Everything will be fine. You made friends with me, didn't you?"
Zelda was silent for a moment, then continued on. "But what if I do terribly at school? What if I don't make any friends?"
"You don't need to worry about that. Most of the people at school are pretty nice."
"I haven't been to a public school in years."
Link nodded in understanding. "I see."
"My dad decided that I would be of more use at home. I did home schooling from about seventh grade. I don't really remember what it's like."
"Don't worry, Zelda," said Link. "You'll be fine."
"I hope so."
- - - -
Later that day, Impa went to register Zelda at the high school, leaving our hero and heroine up to their own devices.
"Might as well kill two birds with one stone," Zelda mumbled from where she was lying upside-down on the couch.
"Whaddaya mean?" Link asked as he absentmindedly channel surfed.
"I mean," said Zelda, rolling over and propping herself up on her elbows, "we might as well take a train into town and go shopping for school stuff." She paused a moment. "When's that party with your crew?" she inquired, abruptly changing the subject.
"Tomorrow night. But even if we take a train into town, we don't have money."
"I have money." Zelda grinned. "Dad was considerate enough to open up a checking account for me so that I wouldn't be a burden on your family's pocket book."
"But that still leaves the problem of me not having any money."
"Guess I'll have to go to town myself, then," said Zelda with a sigh. "Oh, woe is me. I hope I don't get lost."
Link scowled. "Fine, you win," he acquiesced.
(Four hours, fifty minutes and twenty-eight seconds later)
"Are you done buying out the mall yet?"
"No. I told you that you didn't have to come with me. You could have gone to Fry's."
"I should have."
"But you didn't, so stop complaining."
Link groaned.
(An additional thirty eight minutes later)
"NOW are you done?"
"Oh, look! Charlotte Russe is having a sale!"
(One hour more)
"Okay, Link. Ready to go?"
Link gave a pathetic little groan in reply. Zelda smiled and gently took several large shopping bags out of his lacerated hands.
"I never said you had to carry all the bags, silly." Zelda grinned.
"What?" Link asked, his bright blue eyes widening in shock. Zelda shook her head and smiled, and walked out of the mall, followed shortly by an exhausted Link.
"How can you girls shop so much anyway?" he asked, an exhausted sort of curiosity written across his face. Zelda shrugged.
"Maybe it's genetic? I find it rather fun," she noted wryly.
"I don't get it," said Link, shaking his head. "I just don't. How much stuff did you buy?"
"Five pairs of shoes, two new sun dresses, eight pairs of pants, fifteen shirts, new accessories, some lingerie…"
"I remember that," Link mumbled, his face flushing red.
"You could have stayed at the food court," sing-songed Zelda as they turned a corner and reached the train station, sitting down on one of the many wooden benches.
"Well if I'd known..."
Zelda shook her head. "Your fault," she interrupted. "By the way, you did call Impa on my cell phone and tell her where we were, right?"
"Right," said Link with an exhausted sigh, tilting his head back and pulling the green baseball cap perpetually adorning his head over his eyes. "I called Mom. Left a message. Go me. Thanks for buying me the clip-on bowtie, by the way." Link examined the yellow and red polka dot monstrosity and snorted once more. Zelda rolled her eyes and shook her head, sighing.
"Don't worry, Link." Zelda put on an expression of overdramatic sympathy, patting Link's arm with fake concern. "You won't have to come along again. Well, unless you want to, which I doubt."
Link gave a little grunt in reply. Zelda grinned and leaned back as well, stretching her arms above her head.
"Thank you for coming with me today, Link."
"You owe me," he grumbled.
"Name your price," Zelda snickered, turning her head to face him.
"I demand… a cake," he said. "And two new CDs, and a new 120 gig hard drive from Fry's."
"Which CDs?"
"I require The Pixies," Link nodded.
"Of course, your highness." Zelda continued grinning while poking him in the side.
"You're the highness, not me, princess," replied Link with a grimace at Zelda's mountain of shopping bags. "I'm just your poor little servant, forced to carry heavy shopping bags for six hours…"
"A valiant task, to be sure," noted Zelda wryly, standing and collecting the bags as the train arrived. "You're my hero! Come on, lazy," she added, nudging Link with her foot. "Up. The train is here."
"Yeah yeah," he grumbled, standing up. "Do you want me to get those?"
"I got 'em," replied Zelda, not even breaking a sweat as she walked over to the train with bags in hand and through the doors, then sat down, dropping her mountain of items at her feet.
"You're stronger than you look," commented Link, plopping down next to her.
"Back home, I worked out." Zelda smiled, flexing her arm. "Didn't have much else better to do with my time."
"Did you see the workout machinery we have?" Link asked her, turning his head to look at her for a moment.
"Yeah," replied Zelda. "Been too lazy to use it, though."
"Of course," laughed Link, watching the scenery slowly begin to move, then fly by. Zelda studied his profile for a moment, and it struck her how he really was quite good looking. She closed her eyes and leaned her head back against the window behind her, breathing in deeply. It was a fifteen minute train ride back home, then from there, a ten minute walk to the house. Zelda sighed, enjoying the feeling of relaxing.
"Mm," she sighed. "When I get home, I'm going to take a nice warm bubble bath."
"I hope that's not an invitation for me to join you." Link grinned carnally, earning a horrified gasp from Zelda. "Because I'm going to be outside the window, taking pictures."
"Link!" Zelda exclaimed, flushing red. "I hate you!"
"Love you too, Zellie."
"Don't call me Zellie."
"Why not?"
"Shut up."
"Aww, I'm sorry," whimpered Link, looking apologetic. Zelda couldn't help but grin.
"Forgiven," replied Zelda, closing her eyes and smiling, leaning her head back once more. She felt Link gently toying with a loose strand of her hair, gently tugging on it at first then sticking it into her ear for a moment.
"Hey!" she yelped, jerking away from him. He snickered and patted her on the head.
"Calm down. Just wanted to see your reaction."
After a time the train began to slow and finally pulled to a stop. Zelda reached to pick up her bags, but was surprised to see a sun-browned hand stop her own paler one to gather them up instead.
"It's not fair for the princess to have to carry all her wares," Link joked. "Then the servant gets fat and lazy."
"Whatever helps you sleep at night," teased Zelda as she stepped off the train. "We both know you just have a secret shopping bag fetish."
"Say," began Link, waggling a Victoria's Secret bag around in Zelda's face. "What exactly did you get from here, hmm?"
"Look and die," growled Zelda as they stepped onto the main street.
"That secret, huh?"
"Don't want you eyeing my undies, Link." Zelda sighed melodramatically. "How would I ever be able to wear them again knowing that you'd willingly examined them?"
"True," Link agreed, though Zelda noticed the lightest tint of red on his cheeks.
"Pervert," she snapped, snatching the bag away from him. They walked through the town, Link trying to imagine aloud what was in the bag with Zelda verbally abusing him and reached the house before long.
"Mom, we're home," Link yelled. "Saria? Jayda?"
"Guess they went to run errands," commented Zelda, walking up the stairs. "Come on. Just drop the bags in my room."
"Okay, Princess," said Link.
"And another thing," added Zelda. "Please don't call me 'Princess' in public. It might give people the wrong idea."
"Yes, Princess." Link grinned, and Zelda sighed in annoyance.
"Glad to hear you understood me."
"Of course, Princess." Link smiled in a servile manner as Zelda kicked open her bedroom door, dropping her bags roughly on her bed and scaring Valoo, who had been lounging on some pillows. Link followed suit, and then walked to the window, staring at the barely visible slimmer of sparkling sea. He turned to Zelda, grinning.
"Can I stay for your bath?"
"OUT!" Zelda yelled, throwing a shoe box roughly at his head and driving him out of her room. She closed and locked the door once he was out, and sighed, sliding down the wooden frame. Men.
- - - -
The next evening, Zelda was nervously checking her appearance in the mirror, brushing at imaginary dirt on her new blue jeans and adjusting her black "Cheshire Cat" tee, courtesy of Hot Topic. She swept her hair up into a ponytail and grabbed her laptop, tucking it securely underneath her arm.
"LAN party, huh?" she asked her reflection. "A bunch of geeks with caffeine and computers. Then why am I so nervous?" She stepped out of her room and walked down the stairs into the kitchen –
– and was met with a chaotic sight.
"Where's the other Cat 5 cable?" Link wailed as he dug through a black bag he had filled with random junk. "Where'd it go?"
"Relax, Link," said Impa coolly. "I'm sure that somebody else has spare cables."
"I usually bring the spares," Link grumbled as Zelda walked over to him, setting her laptop down on the table, which was already occupied by Link's monitor and tower, not to mention a jumble of wires.
"What's a Cad 5?" Zelda asked, curiosity getting the better of her.
"Cat," corrected Link as he continued to dig through his bag. "As in Valoo. It's a connective wire – connects the computer to the hub."
"Hub?"
"Like a command center, sort of," Link feebly explained while continuing to search for the cable. "It manages all the computers, connects them to one another, and also connects them to the internet. It'll make sense once you see. Aha!" Link emerged triumphantly holding what looked like a bird's nest made of wires. "Found it!"
"Great," said Impa. "Now please clean up your mess. Zelda, help me load the computers into the back of the car and I'll drive you two over."
"Right, mom," replied Link distractedly.
"Zelda, do you want to carry the tower or the monitor?" Impa asked. "The monitor's a little heavier..."
"I'll take the monitor, Impa," assured Zelda. "No worries."
The two carried the monitor and tower out to the suburban, followed by Link, tangled up in wires, bearing Zelda's precious laptop.
"You know," said Zelda conversationally as she slid into the SUV, "Link is a perfect name for a computer geek."
"I know," Link replied with a grin. "I blame my dysfunction on my name."
"Don't blame me," said Impa in defense as she started the car. "The guys at the orphanage came up with that name for you."
"Oh?" Zelda asked. "How'd they get that?"
"Gold chain I was wearing," Link enlightened with a shrug. "Missing a link. Came from my mum. Tada."
"I see," said Zelda with a nod. "I'm named after my mom, courtesy of my father."
"I never knew that."
"That's because I never told you."
"I don't know where I got my name," Impa offered.
"Here we go," Link muttered under his breath.
"What do you mean?" Zelda wondered aloud.
"My parents were breeding partners in some wacked-out cult. The cult leader assigned me my name. Finally, it was too much for my dear old mum, who took me and ran away."
"That's interesting," said Zelda, brows furrowed.
"And lucky," Impa added. "Some fundamentalists came in and busted down the cult HQ not long afterwards. Killed 'em all. I'm the sole survivor" Impa grinned, puffing her chest out with fake pride.
"What were they called?" Zelda asked curiously.
"Sheikah," replied Impa, the word rolling off her tongue like water. "Cult legend went that we were the descendants of an ancient tribe, but I think it was all bull."
"Huh."
They pulled into the driveway of a luxurious two story house and Impa stopped the car.
"Here we are," she announced, and Link hopped nimbly out of the car.
"I'll go get some guys to help with the merry task of lugging the box inside," he said. Zelda tucked her laptop below her arm and followed Link up to the house, feeling a little nervous. Link didn't even bother to knock or ring the doorbell, but instead kicked the door open and poked his head in.
"Guys, a little help?" he yelled in. Zelda hopped back as the door swung open and a young man came trotting out. He wasn't wholly unattractive, but he wasn't Zelda's type, either. His hair was chin length and purple, and he wore a baggy black "GAMER USA" tee. He grinned, slapping Link on the back.
"How 'ya been, man?" he asked.
"Pretty good, Kafei. Allow me to introduce you to Zelda," he said, gesturing to the young blond in the shadows.
"Zelda? I've heard about you," replied Kafei with a grin, turning his eyes onto her. "Anju's lookin' forward to meeting you, I might add. But allow me to formally introduce myself." He extended his hand and said, "Kafei Mayor."
"Zelda Harkinian." Zelda tried her best not to seem nervous as she shook his hand.
"Very nice to meet you. Go on inside and find Anju, she'll get you taken care of. She should be…well…you'll find her. So, Link, let's get your things."
"Right," replied Link, and walked back out to the driveway with Kafei in close company, leaving Zelda alone on the doorstep. With a deep breath, she opened the door and stepped into the house.
The foyer was huge and empty, but the sound of yelling could be heard further into the house. Zelda followed the noise and found a massive number of computers and their respective owners sitting in the midst of a jumble of wires in the living room. The computers were the nicest computers Zelda had ever seen – the cases were black and shiny, some with plastic panels inside so that once could see the wires inside, illuminated by neon lights stored within. It seemed, too, that all of the monitors were flat screens, and Zelda felt slightly ashamed of her tiny little laptop in comparison to these dominating computers. She looked helplessly around, but saw no young woman in the room. A tap came on her shoulder, accompanied with a thankfully feminine, "Are you Zelda?"
"Yes," Zelda replied gratefully, relief flooding through her. "Yes, I am."
"I'm Anju." The attractive young redhead smiled. "I'm Kafei's girlfriend. Did you already meet him?"
"Yeah," replied Zelda.
Anju smiled again. "Great." Her eyes fell upon Zelda's laptop, and her eyes widened in anticipation. "Laptop?"
"Yeah," replied Zelda slightly sheepishly.
"Excellent. Go ahead and claim a spot. Oh, wait though…" Anju walked over to the sofa and climbed onto the back, and Zelda felt a sudden dread of what she was going to do.
"HEY!" Anju cupped her hands around her mouth and yelled, and the room grew slightly quieter. All eyes had turned to her, and several young men were seen removing their headphones. "THIS IS ZELDA," Anju continued, pointing at Zelda. "LINK'S FRIEND. SHE'S COOL, OKAY?"
There was a murmur and nod of assent, and Zelda tried not to flush as she felt many eyes on her.
"GREAT. OKAY, GO BACK TO YOUR TOURNEY." The guys all nodded and pulled their headphones on, and the murmur slowly came back.
"I can't believe you just did that," said Zelda, feeling ashamed.
Anju shrugged. "Ah, they're all harmless. So anyway, go set your laptop down and we'll get you all hooked up, and then I'll introduce you to everybody."
"Okay…" Zelda walked over to a slightly-empty section of the floor and carefully set down her laptop on an abandoned cardboard box, flipping the screen open.
"All we need now is some Cat 5," stated Anju calmly. "I don't suppose you have any?"
"Link's got some," Zelda said.
"Speak of the devil," Anju commented wryly, and looked to the entryway, where Link and Kafei were walking in rather calmly laden with monitor, tower, and Link's bag of computer junk.
"Call me when you're done," Zelda heard Impa yell, and then the slam of the front door. Link proceeded over to where Zelda was and set his monitor down, Kafei plopping the box down next to it.
Anju nodded. "Great. I'll leave you two to get everything hooked up. I'm going to introduce Zelda to everybody."
"Poor Zelda," Link commented once the young blond had been dragged away and was being introduced to the local nerd population. "Anju's really got it in for her."
"That's my woman," laughed Kafei as he plugged Link's monitor into his computer. "Speaking of which, it seems like there's… things between you and Zelda."
"There's nothing," replied Link, though even through his shaggy hair and green baseball cap, Kafei could see the red tips of his ears.
"And I'm the queen of England," laughed Kafei. "But no worries, man, I won't tell her."
"Good," snapped Link, "because there's nothing to tell. Get me a bawls, will you?"
"Sure thing, highness," grumbled Kafei under his breath, though even through his faked foul temper, he was smiling.