A/N: hmm...nothin really to say for some reason...so...settle for some advice for everyday life: don't poke sleeping lions with sticks...bad idea.

Ch 20 A Thousand Lost Forevers

Sonny didn't know how long he'd stayed like that, hanging his head and listening to sound of the room. But he knew it had been a while since he'd said anything when he was snapped from wherever he'd gone off to. He felt her hand twitch under his and he immediately looked up in time to see her eyes open.

She gazed around the room with a look of confusion. Obviously trying to figure out where she was, Sonny thought. He removed his hand, and while scooting the chair a little closer to, he looked relieved at his waking sibling.

"Hey. Glad you're awake, we were worried about you." he said honestly. "I'm going to get a doctor and tell Carly and Jason you're up." He stood up and prepared to do just as he said when she spoke. Her voice sounded small and soft. So much so that if he wasn't facing her when she spoke, he might not have known she said anything.

"Who?"

He took a mental step back, hoping he'd heard wrong. He cleared his throat to keep his voice from failing him.

"What did-what did you say?" he asked unsure what else could say. Courtney's head went from side to side and she sat up and looked at her surroundings frantically, her breaths coming out raggedly in her panic. Sonny put a hand on either of her shoulders and gently guided her back to the mattress, but kept his hands where they were to keep her focus while he spoke. "Just-it's ok, just calm down and look at me, ok? Just listen to me. Do you know who I am? Do you know me?"

Sonny looked intently into her eyes and his widened in response. He backed up slowly his gaze never leaving hers.

"I'll-I'll go get someone." he stammered. At least he thought he said it; he hoped he did, before he left the room.

His feet carried him swiftly down the corridor, his eyes darted around in search of a doctor. Not finding one along the way, he went straight to the nurse's station. The one there was on the phone and didn't seem to notice him there.

"Excuse me-" he tried to keep his cool and be civil but the woman only continued her conversation.

"Sonny what is it?" he heard Jason ask from behind him. But he continued to try and speak to the woman.

"Hey, listen, I need-" the woman held up her index finger to halt him.

"Sonny, what?" he asked again. "What's going on?"

"I'm trying to get a damn doctor!" he shouted and slammed his fist on the counter, causing a loud bang to sound through the waiting room.

"What do you need a doctor for? Is Courtney ok? Did something happen?" Jason asked, concern flowing from his voice.

"Sh-She's awake. Where's Carly?"

"Getting coffee. Courtney's awake? Did she say anything?"

Sonny looked at his right hand man and best friend. He knew he had to say something, but he didn't know how to tell him exactly what transpired.

"Yeah, man, she did." before he could figure out how to tell him anything, Monica approached them.

"There you are; I have the blood tests back." she said to them.

"Later-" Sonny interrupted. "She's awake now and I want you to check her out."

The door opened Monica walked in first followed by the two men. She was taken back at the sight of the empty bed before them. The momentary shock fell away when her gaze fell to a corner of the room. She saw her sitting in the corner with her knees against her chest, elbows resting on them and her face hidden in the crook of her bent arms.

The older woman approached her slowly. She squatted to her level and place a hand on her shoulder.At the moment of contact, Courtney jerked her head up and looked at the woman. Instinctively, she tried to back away but found the wall at her back prevented her from doing so.

"Easy, it's alright. I just want to ask you some questions. Do you feel like you can answer them?" Courtney slowly moved her head down then up once to reply to her question.

"Ok. First off, do you know where you are?" She digested the doctors question completely before shaking her head from side to side.

"Do you recognize anyone in the room?"

Courtney looked from the doctor to the men standing behind her. She recognized the dark haired man who'd been there earlier. She nodded and pointed to him to answer the question. Monica looked over her shoulder and took note of who she pointed to. Slightly upset that it hadn't been her son who, she knew, loved the girl so deeply.

"Who is he?" she asked Courtney.

"H-He was in here, be-before." she answered softly.

"Just one more; can you tell me your name?"

Sonny couldn't take just watching anymore and left the room unnoticed. He had a feeling he knew her answer to the question and couldn't stand it. Stepping into the hallway, he barely missed running down his wife and the steaming liquid from her hands.

"Hey, I came back and everyone was gone so I figured you guys were here." she saw the solemn look on his face. "What's wrong?"

"I promise it's the last one, then I won't ask you anymore. Do you know your name?"

She put her face in her hands when the tears threatened to fall. She didn't know the answer. She didn't know her name; she didn't know anything. Afraid her voice would only break and open the door for the flowing tears if she tried, she only shook her head.

Jason hadn't moved, he couldn't. He couldn't even feel his legs. He couldn't feel anything besides his heart breaking for the woman he loved. The whole situation was like a horrible dream. He had been where she was and he wouldn't wish it on his worst enemy, least of all her. All he wanted was for her to look at him and smile that brilliant smile. But he knew she wouldn't.

"That's enough for now." Monica said, patting her shoulder to offer a small amount of comfort to the crying woman. "How about we get you back to bed, hmm?"

She nodded but didn't move. Monica sighed and cast a glance towards her son. He met her gaze and answered the question she silently asked him by approaching them.. Jason moved to help get her back into the bed, but as soon as he got close enough to touch her she once again tried to jump away. He pulled back his arms and Courtney looked towards Dr. Quartermaine.

After a few encouraging words from his mother, Jason was able to guide the blonde back onto the mattress. Once she was settled, Monica indicated that she would speak with him outside. Jason stayed a moment longer before preparing to talk with her.

"Wait." she said pleadingly before he could leave. "My-my name?"

If it was possible, he felt the pieces of his heart break even smaller. He was sure by now that they would be able to fit through the eye of a needle. That she had to depend on someone else to give her such a simple answer was horrible. He felt a great admiration for his mother for having lived through such a situation.

"Courtney. You're name is Courtney."