A/N: Here's chapter 5, enjoy! Please review! -
Kuraku
Chapter 5:
Kakashi's family
"Here" she handled both boys a bowl full of miso ramen and they ate while silence once again won over social activities, like talking for example.
After lunch the boys backed out of the kitchen to watch a new movie Iruka had gotten from one of his friends when he moved. He had totally forgotten about it, but it felt nice to watch this reminder of his previous home with a new friend from his new home.
After the movie they went out again, leaving a very disapproving Taki behind.
"Mom, trust me, we'll be okay" Iruka had entrusted his mother.
"Oi Kakashi! You wanna play along?" a few boys had asked, yelling from the playing grounds where the now already quite close friends had first met only a day or so ago.
"No, I pass, maybe some other time!" he had yelled back at them and they had walked on.
Kakashi had showed Iruka the place he mentioned in his explanation earlier that day, where he had supposedly fallen off. Also he had showed most of the hangout places in the village and about all other special features of his village.
"So, do you think you'll go to school tomorrow?" Iruka asked as he had noticed the hissing sound Kakashi made when breathing.
They were momentarily walking through another main street of the little village. Iruka was surprised that for such a small village, there were so many main streets and even dozens more alleys, with whom Kakashi was all very familiar with. Every little street, main street or alley seemed to carry its own little piece of the village's history.
"Yeah, I think so, why not?" he actually asked himself this question more than he asked Iruka, but Iruka was the one to answer it though.
"Well with those bruised ribs, mild concussion, scraps and those horrible boys still on the loose. I don't know, but isn't it more wisely to heal first before risking to run in to them again?" Iruka asked worried.
"Nah, I'm not afraid of them and they only call me names and threaten me at school. They don't dare to go any further than that" Kakashi explained lazily.
"But what if they do go further? Or if they follow you back home?"
"Then I'll just let the guarding dogs out" Kakashi joked.
"…" Iruka didn't know what to say and looked at the end of the road, which was now coming into sight. The road led into a big forest that he had seen when his parents had driven through it when they first came here.
How can he talk so easyly about it?
"It's not so hard," Kakashi answered "After a while you get used to it and shove it at the back of your head."
Kakashi's sudden answer had surprised Iruka, he didn't knew he had talked his thoughts aloud.
Iruka slowly let Kakashi's answer get absorbed in his mind. How could a boy, not even two years older than he was, live like this? Iruka thought sadly.
Slowly the sun was setting and making place for the big moon to settle itself upon the section of the earth where the two boys were.
"We should head back" Iruka decided.
"Yea, good idea" Kakashi agreed.
They slowly walked back and when they arrived, a huge man opened the door as Kakashi and Iruka were still pulling out their shoes on the front porch.
"Dad!" Iruka quickly got rid of his shoes and ran up his dad and got a loving hug from the huge man who had also opened the door.
"Ah Kakashi, I've heard what happened, next time first put mattress there and then fall!" Kurai said in his low voice.
"I'll try to remember the next time I might fall off of something" he chuckled.
All three of them entered and after not even ten minutes dinner was ready.
They all ate laughing, talking and having a good time. Kakashi really couldn't remember the last time he had have such a good time. No worries, no sadness, no phone calls, only laughter and joy. It absolutely felt great to be around a normal family again.
Although his parents hadn't always been like the way they were now. It had been many years and he should have even been to little to remember, but he did.
It was a time when his parents didn't have fights about their business. His dad had been in the management for a really long time, before he was even born and so he hadn't had a trouble with it. It all started when his mother got promoted into that station too. First there were just little arguments, but later on they sometimes escalated into fierce fights; His father hitting his mother several times.
His mother became really sick of it and wanted to leave, but she couldn't. Her job would fire her if she would leave her husband and she thought her job was way more important than her husband or her health. Still being sick of his father, she started to cheat on him. First the gardener, then the lonely neighbour and even men she had never known or seen before.
He knew about it all, as he had seen his mother too many times with all those other men. Soon his father found out as well. Kakashi had been the one to witness it all: his father had hit his mother, and he had hit her again, and again and again and the last hits he had given her before she had passed out, were even with a wooden chair which had stood nearby him. He saw his mother lying in a bloody mess on the floor, but couldn't do a thing about it. If he had interfered with them, he had surely gotten some hits as well. His father had lost all his rational thinking and seeing his father like that made Kakashi very, very afraid.
He was only four when it happened. He had cried all night long and a little piece of his heart had died that evening, knowing it would never revive again. At noon the next day he had finally crawled out his bed and walked in the kitchen to find it empty, like it had been more and more lately.
That evening his parent talked and came to the conclusion that it could no longer be that way. They had apologized to each other and then made wild love the whole night long. Kakashi thought his parents wouldn't fight anymore after that night, but how terribly wrong he was. His parents had decided to live for their jobs and only live together and be sex-buddies. Being only sex-buddies his mother decided she could go fool around with other men again; only having to survive another of his dad's full attacks. His dad was also banging other women though, but he thought that was irrelevant. His mother of course didn't liked his way of acting and many fights had developed from these courses of actions. Every time there was a fight, Kakashi had watched it. He made himself not turn away to drown in sorrow. He thought he had to face what he was up against. He saw how his mom got hit every time she did not obeyed her husband. It made him strong. He never ever wanted to be like his parents and by watching their mistakes he would make sure he would never treat his own children or wife that way, if he would ever have any.
Kakashi surely had gotten his own stubbornness from his mother. Everything his father forbid her to do, she did. He couldn't even call it stubbornness anymore, foolishness was more in place.
After every one of their fierce fights, they made mad love again, as a sort of fight-and-make-up. Kakashi only watched their fights, when the lovemaking began, he retreated back in his room, thinking about the reasons his parents had for doing the things they did.
The intense fights continued for over almost a year, but started decreasing as time passed.
Now, as he was almost eight, the fights were at minimum. His father was still seeing other women, like his mother was seeing other men, even though his father was still not quite happy with the new deal they had made with each other.
The new deal contented that his mother could see other men and his father could see other women, without any arguments. Sometimes when his father would see his wife with other men in his own bed, he would still snap, but most of the times he would just ignore the idea of HIS wife and OTHER men in HIS bed.
Kakashi had never spoken with anyone about it. He was so ashamed about his parents' behaviour. His father had also threatened him several times.
If he would say anything to anyone, His father would 'chase after him and beat him to a pulp until he could never say anything to anyone', were his exact words. He had hit him already a few times, the times when he couldn't stand their fights anymore. The times when his mother really needed his help, if not she would end up in the intensive care department afterwards. Those were the times his father had dared to scold him too, to hit him too, to kick him too and to say he didn't cared about him either.
The first time he had said that, Kakashi couldn't stop crying. At that his father had yelled at him that he was weak and that he should stop crying and just curl up and die.
Kakashi eyes were red from all the tears but he looked empty, it felt as if his heart was ripped into little pieces and was now dying very slowly and very painfully, torturing him as every second slowly went by. His chest hurted, not only from all the punches, but mostly by his own father's words. Shortly after he realized what his father had said, he fainted, although the time between the words and fainting felt like an eternity to the little silver-haired boy, as thoughts raced through his head at the speed of light.
While he was falling down he still vaguely heard his father's shouts: 'Yes, finally! He's dead! He was the biggest mistake I've ever made, well except asking you to marry me of course!' he faintly heard his father kick his mother another time, and then it all went black around him.
No more voices, no more pain, no more stress, just nothing more, only silence, only he and his dreams. It was the first time in a very long time he had dreamed so many pleasant dreams.
The next morning he woke up, he was still lying on the ground. The blood, which had came from his mother and him from the night before, was cleaned up. He had slowly crawled up to his room and locked it. The rest of the day he had sat in his room, but he hadn't spilled even one single tear, he felt too empty for it. Every thought about his parents and his misery made him want to cry, but he couldn't, he just couldn't let the tears flow. He would not allow himself to drown in sorrow, not because of these things, these people, these feelings, this hatred.
It was the first time in his life that he had hated something. He didn't hate his parents though, he hated himself. He hated the feeling of helplessness, the feeling of sadness, and the feeling of weakness. Afterwards he didn't know why he'd fainted, maybe it were the words that had shocked him so much, or maybe it were the punches, or maybe even both, but it had happened and he wasn't happy about it. He had given his dad prove that he indeed was weak and that made him feel even worse.
As it slowly went dark outside he had unlocked his room and moved into the kitchen to fix himself some food. As expected the kitchen was empty, but for the first time he was happy about it, as he had absolutely no need to see his parents now. He had eaten, gone back to his room, locked it, went into his bed and was soon fast asleep.
The other times he had interfered with his parents were about the same and he had learned to live with it, although every time it happened again, he felt dreadful.
"Kakashi-kun, what is it? Does your chest hurt?" a worried voice called him.
He opened his eyes and his sight was blurry. First he thought it was because he had opened them to quickly, but as his sight didn't approved, he found out he was crying.
"Kakashi-kun, what's the matter?" the worried voice asked again.
Kakashi looked up to see Iruka looking awfully worriedly at him.
His sight was still blurry, but he could see the troubled and caring look upon Iruka's face. After dinner Kakashi and Iruka had decided to watch another movie and then walk Kakashi home.
"Oh nothing, I'm fine" he quickly wiped his sleeve across his face, erasing all evidence of any tears that might have been there
He didn't even know he had been letting tears flow as he was thinking of his parents.
"Liar! Now tell what's wrong!" Iruka demanded still worried.
"Nothing."
"You can tell me Kakashi-kun, really" Iruka said in soft tone and Kakashi wanted to tell him so badly, but he couldn't.
Iruka would certainly dump him after it and then he would be alone again, he could let that happen.
"Nothing, quit asking" Kakashi said a little annoyed.
Maybe that will stop him Kakashi thought to himself.
Indeed it helped, Iruka stopped asking, but Kakashi noticed him glancing at him several times.
At least that's better than him asking questions he thought as he watched the last part of the movie with an empty expression.
After the film Kurai and Iruka walked him home.
The first sight of Kakashi's huge house took both Kurai as his son's breath away.
Kakashi brought them through the gate and up the pretty long driveway, Kakashi stood still at the end of it, in front of his front door.
"You never told us you were such a rich kid!" Kurai said.
"Uh yeah, I'd rather not show off with it" Kakashi said and Iruka didn't knew for certain if he heard a little bit of sadness in the boy's voice.
"Oh well, it's okay with me" Kurai laughed "Haha, but anyways, you sure you'll be okay all by yourself?" Kurai asked pretty serious suddenly.
"Yeah, I'll manage. It has happened before" Kakashi curved his eyes and smiled.
"Um okay" Kurai was still a little unsure if should leave the boy all alone. "Then we'll be going, right Iruka?" Iruka nodded.
Kurai turned and Iruka slowly followed, as the walked back down the driveway.
Iruka turned around, as Kakashi was opening the door.
"Hey Kakashi-kun, I'll see you tomorrow on school, right?" Iruka called.
"You bet!" the silver-haired called back enthusiastic.
"Pleasant dreams, Kakashi-kun!"
"You too!" and with that both boys turned.
I wonder if his parents really haven't noticed he was gone… Iruka thought.