The Beginning
Disclaimer: All of this is based upon the lovely J.K. Rowling's work.
(…): Random Thoughts or Ideas
Italics: Journal Entry
Bold: Emphasis
Journal Entry: July 26th, 1996:
All of my life I have never been enough. Never good enough. Never smart enough. Never powerful enough. Never normal enough.
I have just never been enough.
(Maybe that is my fate. Maybe this is my "power the dark lord knows not". The ability to never be enough. Hmm… wouldn't that just be plain ironic. A Dark Lord defeated by some bloke with the ability to be a loser. Wow, makes me feel really proud.)
At first I thought it was just the Dursleys. I thought they were just being difficult, that they were lying to me when they called me a freak. In wasn't until later that I realized they were right. That I was (and still very much am) a freak.
Then I arrived at Hogwarts (funny how everything always comes back to Hogwarts…) and I realized that I was supposed to be some sort of hero … that I was supposed to be this "savior". How was I ever supposed to live up to that kind of expectation?
Of course, I didn't. I was never good enough.
First it was the disastrous Norbert incident in my first year, which lost us 150 points. Then, it was the whole Parselmouth/Heir of Slytherin fiasco in my second year. Followed by the "Werewolf/Sirius Black/Buckbeak/the Ministry is a Bunch of Morons" incident third year. Then the Triwizard Tournament … and Cedric … during fourth year. Finally, just weeks ago, the Department of Mysteries and Sirius …
I mean let's face facts here. I am NO savior. I can't even save myself (especially from my rather abusive relatives). I have enough problems of my own; you can't expect me to solve everyone else's. I am just not that good.
Academically, I am only average (but that might have something to do with never studying). Well, at least, I think I am only average. The only grades I have ever really seen are Hermione's and Ron's, so that might not be the best way to judge my scholarly standings (and I am still not sure how I did on my O.W.L.S. Maybe a miracle has happened and I have done quite well … but probably not) …
And magically … oh, I won't even go there. For Merlin's sake, I had problems learning a Summoning Charm (Accio); now I am supposed to kill a Dark Lord and end his villainous reign…
I think not…
A small, beady eye scanned the emerald writing on a worn page. A large (and rather out of place) grin formed upon a scarred face, as an equally mutilated man read the entry. He let out a barking laugh as he reached the end of the page, lifting a marked hand to turn the page.
Mad-Eye Moody was finding this journal to be quite enlightening and enjoyable (well, enjoyable only in certain places).
Leaning upon the far wall, a tiny, bearded man smiled jovially. He (having read the journal earlier) could understand the old Auror's amusement at a select number of the entries. Near the tiny man, a young lady, with hair like honey streaked with gold and silver, perched precariously upon a desk. She nodded her head in understanding (having also read the journal) as she played with the tip of a patched and frayed Wizard's hat. The hat merely smirked.
Moody continued to laugh. His second (ever-whirling) eye was currently showing its white back as it focused on a far younger man standing directly beyond his left shoulder. Emerald eyes rolled as the older man guffawed again. The golden skinned young man turned away in amused disgust and smoothly glided to a desk along the wall. He seated himself gently upon the solid chair, grinning at the young lady as he sat. He shook his head in quiet defeat, tossing ebony locks.
Deciding to ignore the ever-laughing ex-Auror, the young man again smiled. "Well, Gentlemen and gentle lady," the golden skinned youth stated mannerly, "I believe that it is time we get down to business."
AN: All right I lied. Child of Grace will probably not be updated for awhile. Sorry, but I am just not happy with what I have planned out for the story. I wrote out the next chapter but it is now in the rubbish bin because I just didn't like what I wrote. Also, it seems as though my muse for the plot has abandoned me. I might have to put it on hiatus until I can rearrange the storyline and find a new muse.
On another note, the other person in the last chapter was the Sorting Hat (kudos to verdragon for guessing correctly). I thought about including Mad-eye in it as well but decided to place him in another chapter (I bet you can guess which one). As for what they are planning … well, we will get to that in future chapters.
ReginaLucifer: I am sorry I forgot to mention you last chapter, so a late thanks for reviewing. I am happy this is now a story as well. I have a general idea where this is going, but it is not set in stone. I am letting my feelings and thoughts dictate what I write each chapter (basically making it up as I go along).
Verdragon: Yes, it is the Sorting Hat (such an underutilized character).
Nora01: Thanks for the review. However, it was not Dumbledore but rather the Sorting Hat. In chapter three, I alluded to the fact that Dumbledore and Harry had a falling out, so it wouldn't have been the Headmaster.
Shadowface: Thanks!
Ever Hopeful,
Azar