Ch. 50 To Live Without Dreams

After the song ended, Carly and Sonny returned to the table. She didn't want to stop dancing, but her husband insisted that she not stay on her feet for too long. She laughing agreed, knowing that it was only the beginning. The next thing he'd do, and what she feared the most, was forbid her from any and all junk food. That was where she was going to have to get feisty and attempt to draw the line. However, now that they were sitting down, she had a better view of the couple that continued their dance as another song played.

"Keep staring you might actually see through them." the man said, catching her off guard.

"What?" she asked, looking at her husband. He chuckled at her and she felt herself melting as his dimples became visible yet again.

"Carly, you're watching them like your life depended on it." he joked.

"I'm sorry, but come on." she said to him. "It's beautiful. They're starting from the beginning all over again. And this time, you're not going to cause any trouble for them, right?"

"Yeah." he agreed, but the woman didn't like the tone in his voice when he said the word.

"Sonny," she said warningly. "You're not going to do anything, are you? Because I thought we've talked about how wrong you were to try and keep them apart."

"Believe me, I know I was wrong." he said, "But, you know, things happen."

"Yeah, they do. But we're a family, and we help each other through them."

"It's just, I don't think it's wise to get too invested in this…I don't know, this romance. Think about how difficult it was for them before, and now it's like a whole new ball game." he tried to explain.

"Right, and do you remember what it was that caused the most trouble for them?" she reminded.

"I'm not talking about me, Carly." he said, trying to stay calm and not get too into the disagreement. "Jason still works for me. People are still going to come after us through the people in our lives."

"It's ok to be worried." she told him, knowing he was already way past plain old worry when it came to enemies going after his family. His paranoia was only going to grow now that they had a baby on the way.

"You know you and the boys are the most important things in my life."

"Yes, I d- wait a minute." she said, hearing exactly what he'd said. "You said 'boys'. How do you know this one's a boy?"

"Oh, well, you know." he said, smile returning to his face.

"well, just to let you know, I think we've got another 'he' on our hands, too." she told him, happy the mood had shifted. "Besides, for you sanity, it better be a boy."

"Oh really?" he asked amused. "Why's that?"

"Because with a girl, you'd go crazy chasing off all her boyfriends."

"Oh no. See to have a boyfriend, I'd have to let her in the same room as a boy." he teased.

"You look amazing." he told her as they moved to the music.

"You told me that already." she answered with a glowing smile.

"It's true. You're beautiful."

"Well, you clean up nice yourself." she returned jokingly.

He chuckled and rested his chin on top of her head. He felt better than he had in months. Feeling her in his arms, smelling her hair; it all seemed too perfect. What scared him was waking up to the lonely, empty penthouse and have it all be just a dream. Jason wasn't usually the person that thought in what-ifs. But he found it harder not to when it came to Courtney. He was always wondering what he could've done differently any time he saw her in any sort of pain. But the thing she brought out of him the most was definitely the love. He knew what it meant to love unconditionally now, thanks to her.

Suddenly, Jason was ripped from his reverie. It all happened so fast, he wasn't sure it could even be counted in minutes. One second, they were peacefully dancing and feeling perfectly happy, the next he was pushing her to the floor, covering her body with his, and feeling deathly afraid for her. Courtney's hands balled into fists, the fabric on the front of his shirt tightly clutched within them. He felt her grip continuously tightening as the roar of the gunfire continued for a few more moments.

When he no longer heard the bullets, he could hear Sonny shouting orders to find out who it was. Jason raised his head to look at Courtney.

"Are you alright?" he asked, praying she was.

She didn't respond to his question and for a moment he was afraid that she'd been hit. He made a move to get up and check her out, but when he tried to life himself up he found himself being pulled back toward the floor. He quickly discovered it was her vice grip on his shirt that kept him anchored to her body. He could see the paleness in her knuckles from holding so tight. From that, her shallow breaths, and the far off look in her eyes, he knew she wasn't hurt physically.

"Courtney." he began, trying to get her to focus on him. He knew she was in shock about what had happened. Jason ran the back of his hand softly over her cheek. "Courtney, look at me."

He glanced over towards their table where he saw Sonny and Carly getting up from the floor. Jason knew the man had done the same thing as him by shielding the woman he loved with himself. The difference was that sadly, Carly was used to the type of situation. It was all new for Courtney. Again he tried to get up, but she gripped his shirt tighter and tried to pull him closer.

"Don't" he heard her say in a soft, shaking voice. He couldn't explain how glad he was to hear her speak.

"It's ok. It's over, alright? It's over." he said trying to calm her down. "We're going to stand up now, ok?"

His hands traveled down, until they were over hers. He let them linger there for a few seconds before hers let go of the cloth and latched onto them just as tight. Once he lifted them to their feet, she wrapped her arms around him and pressed against his body, burying her face in his chest. He kissed the top of her head, trying to tell her he was there and she was ok.

"Is anybody hurt?" he heard Carly ask the room. "Everybody ok?"

Jason waved her over and she quickly approached the two. He winced slightly, feeling Courtney's nails against his back as she tried to pull herself closer.

"God, are you guys alright?" Carly asked, coming upon them.

"Physically." he answered, running his hand up and down the back of the woman in his arms, before turning to Carly. "You're going home."

"I know. Sonny's ordering Max take me and Courtney home as we speak."

"Will you do me a favor? Will you just stay with her until I get there?" he asked.

"You know I will." she replied.

""Courtney, Carly's going to take you home, ok?" he asked. She shook her head against him.

"I don't want to be alone." she whispered into him.

"It's ok. She'll take you home and stay with you until I can get there."

"Ho-how long?" she asked.

"I'll be there as soon as possible. I promise." he swore to her. "Will you be ok?"

She nodded and slowly released her hold on him, wrapping her arms around herself instead. Carly put her arm on the woman's shoulders and guided her to the exit of the club, all the while trying to soothe her with words of comfort.

"It's ok. Sonny and Jason will take care of it." she said, to her. "Do you want anything?"

"Just take me home, please." she said in a voice that sounded completely broken.

"Of course." she answered, rubbing her back for assurance. "Let's go."