/Boss Ikari/
- lawless priest -
07 - War of the fluffies prt. 2
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/BI/: everyone's favorite blue haired, red eyed, half angel assassin's POV :/ can't you tell I'm really getting into this?
"Bastards!" was the German's war cry as she fired away at the coming enemy tide.
I did have to wonder why wouldn't the 'little annoying shits', as the lady clerk at the shoe store had called them, just die. No creature could take that many shots to the head and still continue. It wasn't logical. But of course, neither was the fact that I was in a mall parking lot, nearly waist deep in Care Bear remains while in the process of adding more of their number to the pile of fallen raving teddy bears on crack.
The clan and what others we could find were in a clustered circle attacking the creatures as we made our way toward our vehicles. Unfortunately, we had lost a few on the way, but many had been saved and even now were making their way away from this place that god had turned his eye away from.
We had just reached the car of an older woman and her husband, blasting the raving creatures as they came near. The women, who was beside me fired at a bear that had leaped above the others and would have tackled me to the floor, right into the waiting, fluffy, possessed hands of the enemy. I showed the lady my appreciation and we both continued to mow down those opposing us.
I was surprised that she was the one who had protected me. If Sohryu or one of the others had I would not have thought much on it, but that woman and her husband weren't on that list. I was all but certain that I would have been the one who ended up saving them.
They each held rifles 'borrowed' from the hunting shop that we had passed on our way here. Their aim had not been good, barely decent, for they had never used one before, but that had critically improved since our trek began. This type of exercise made sure of that.
Of course there were always exceptions. The pimply geeky kid beside me from the book store for instance. He must have gotten a lot of grief for looking like he did and for working at a book store. It was rather stereotypical to say that he was pathetically weak, he could barely hold his rifle up and his aim was worse than the old couple, but I didn't make the rules, so whatever.
At the moment he was trying to shot with while holding his black eye, neither of which actually helped his aim and it showed with shots that either never reached their intended victims, closing your eyes when your aiming does that, or ended up flying over our own heads. Of course, this only ended up bestowing the wrath of Sohryu on him.
"You know, I've seem to have pissed a lot of people off in my life." He was saying to me.
"You know, you're pissing me off right now." that shut him up. He even moved away a bit, trying to distance himself from me. His little run in with Horaki had given him a healthy fear of the clan.
Amazingly, his next shot actually took out one of the creatures. Even more amazing was the fact that he had been aiming at the one in front of him and not the one coming for Asuka who was behind him.
The red head looked to me, then pointed to him and gave me a sign. He thought we were trying to tell him something and began throwing signs and signals back at us. Sohryu looked at me and then back at him, both of us shaking our heads at his attempts to communicate.
She waved both hands in front of her to get his attention, signaling that he had misunderstood, then in all seriousness, flicked him off. He grimaced, we smiled and all was right with the world. It was almost like back when we were taking over the Kodams, except we weren't dodging the rainbow colored beams of an army of demonic teddy bears.
I was about to tell him to put his gun down and stay in the middle were it would be safe... for us more so than him, but his next shot changed that plan.
I still don't understand how it happened, but the bullet he fired missed its target, nothing new, and hit a rock or something and then somehow, somehow ricketcated off a tree and caught him in the chest.
"Did I just get shot by a tree? Damn this sucks." he didn't get to say much else before he was taken by the Bears.
"What a way to go, though." Sunja said and we all nodded.
Once the last survivors had effectively driven off without pursuit or finding an end like the Book shop kid, and after thanking us profusely, we began to move toward our own mode of transportation to begin the search for our wayward leader.
/BI/ Toji's POV/ I had to do it at least once.
"Exactly, now then, you kids are going to have to show us what you can do."
This chick had to be kidding us. And who the hell was she with this kid stuff. Hell, we had two or three years on her. I shared a look with the others. I really felt like snickering.
"And what do you want us to do?"
Ikari asked the question and we waited for the answer.
"Can you shoot a ...?" She never even got to finish her sentence before we had our pieces out, cocked and ready for whatever. "... gun?"
"What do you want to die?" I threw in. Her answer was Bears. I had been hoping for Pokemon, but unfortunately or fortunately, there weren't any around.
"We'll need ammo for our weapons when we're done. We had been trying to hold back when we met your father here." Good job Ken, cause we were screwed if these people kicked us out without a few extra clips. Mine were just about dead, too.
"Fine, just tell us what type of gun you have and we'll get you your ammo." We did, she did and we were set for some serious Care Bear Frag time. Now if I could only get Ikari off my back about that Bank thing.
/BI/ The tumulus and erratically sexy state of mind that we call Asuka's POV
We were just about to get into our car, bears at our heels when the little devils' heads began to explode. Fluffy bodies began to fall all around under the assault of automatic machine gun fire.
"You girls need any help." A black dressed man surrounded by equally dark dressed men asked with voice that made satin seem hard by comparison.
"Kaji!"
"I'll take that as a no."
Kaji, my Knight in shinning armor. Always there to rescue his damsel in distress. Why couldn't that bastard Ikari be more like him. Kaji-kun was supposed to be his mentor so why wasn't that baka learning anything.
"Can we move this along?"
"Oh, hello Misato. What are you doing here?" why was the lush always around my Kaji-kun!
"Saving your asses. What does it look like?"
"We appreciate it Ms. Katsunagi." Hikari tried to say.
"We were fully capable of surviving on our own." That was from Rei of course.
"Come on girls, lets go find your errant leader." The unshaven Section 2 agent replied, trying to hurry us along as he signaled his men's cars into defensive positions around us as we all piled back into our car.
"But we thought that they would be with you by now. Kaji-san?" Hikari asked my hunky knight for us.
"Yeah, he and the others said that they were going to head right over there didn't they." Megumi offered as well.
"And they've had plenty of time since then to get there." Sunja finished for her sister.
"Obviously that is not the case. Ikari-kun and the others most have been stopped along the way."
"If it was so obvious why'd you have to say it then, eh wonder girl?"
"Because it may not have been as apparent to you Sohryu."
That Ayanami, I swear, was going to catch an ass whooping one day for that smart mouth of hers.
"So how are we going to find them, then? We still have no idea where to look?" Megumi asked Kaji while still keeping an eye out for any stray Care Bears.
"His cell phone, we can trace it." and with that we were off.
/BI/ Shinji, aka 'the man', aka 'angel slayer', aka 'THAT BAKA!', Ikari's POV
It came left with another coming from the right walking along the side of the wall. The little bastards thought they were smart. It was a shame that they were lying to themselves. The one on the left ducked behind a trashcan as I fired, the shots bouncing off and away. His friend had no such can to hide behind and wasn't as lucky.
The bear landed hard from the shot to the gut. It tried to crawl toward its friend, who gave him cover fire, blasting a hole in the wall that had been behind me. But I was across the alley and had a clear view of both the cute little shits. It was over before it had really started, but I checked my clip for a quick ammo count. It helped to be informed.
I could hear Suzuhara and Aida off in the cut somewhere. The echoes of their gun fire dying down. It was time to head back. We had done what we had came for.
I had to admit that I was close to shooting the punk behind me who they had sent to watch my little show, who didn't think to pull out his piece and help out. A few of those times I was really done for if it had not been for the famous Ikari luck that seemed to do more damage than aide.
"So, tell me, what was your name again?" I asked my silent admire. It was getting dark now and I still knew very little about the people we were hanging around with.
"Taisho."
"Well Taisho, how'd you like our little show? It was proudly sponsored by these bastards." I said pointing to the pile of bears.
He merely smirked and followed me toward where we last heard the racket the Stooges were making. I had my piece ready. If you hadn't noticed from all of the almost daily foolishness, in this city, you could never be too careful.
Kensuke was waiting on the step of some building's back door. His watcher from the gun shop with him. Oh, yeah. Apparently we had ran into the owner of the gun shop without knowing it. We laughed our asses off when Kudi told us. It did explain the stockpile of weapons if not there aversion of the cops, but who really liked the cops anyway.
I posted up on the wall and we all chilled waiting for the others. Five minutes later Toji and his watcher ran up. Ken and I made sure they hadn't been followed by any Bears.
"Your late Suzuhara."
"Sorry, I just got mugged on the way by these two bees trying to get it on."
"What?" Aida asked. I was thinking the same thing. The hell was he talking about.
"Yeah, they were all into it man, you know."
"No, we don't." I threw in.
"So, what, they were gay bees or something?" That was from Ken.
"Gay bees? The hell are you talking about?" Now Toji was confused.
"What do you mean 'what am I talking about'?" I could already tell it was going to be one of those conversations. They didn't call Ken and Toji Stooges for nothing.
"You just said you saw two bees going at it, right?" The spiky haired man nodded. "Well then, they're gay bees then." I tried to help out. I knew he got it then.
"Why do they have to be gay? That's just wrong of you man to just label them like that. They're just bees Aida, Ikari. You just can't say that about them!"
I guess I was wrong.
"Dude, they are bees damnit! Sure we can!" Kensuke obviously had had enough.
"Um... Toji, you do know that there's only one female bee in the
whole colony, right?"
"Oh, yeah. Wow, that must suck for them."
...sigh,
'Let it go, Ikari, just let it go.' My inner voices were telling me.
"Toji." I was wondering if Ken's inner voices were telling him the same as mine.
"What?"
"Shut up." Strike two for two Ikari.
"I'm just saying man..." Oh no, he's trying to explain himself! 'There's nothing you can say!' I wanted to scream.
"And I'm saying shut up."
"Hey, it's not tha..."
"Did you hear what I just said?"
"Yeah, but?"
"Obviously you didn't because you're still talking."
"Oh, come on. I just..."
"So let me remind you, since you didn't hear the first few times."
"Dude, calm dow..."
"I said, SHUT UP! You get that ok?" He nodded with his hands holding his ears. The rest of us copied him.
"Good." Satisfied, the glasses wearing military otaku headed back for the shop.
All I could do was shake my head as Toji followed a few feet behind him.
"Do you go through this type of stuff all the time?" Our watchers asked me. I had almost forgoten that those guys were even there. They all had these stupefied expressions on their faces.
"You have no idea. Ha! You haven't even met the girls yet! Hell, that's when the show really gets going."
They just looked at me not knowing what to say. I left them to it and hurried up to the other two, hoping there weren't any Care Bears around to hear all of that mess. They'd probably start thinking the human race was loony or something.
/BI/
"So how were they?" Fumi questioned the three that the Gun Shop Crew had sent out with us.
They replied that we were very adept at gun play and that we obviously weren't new to this type of deal. Overall, we kicked ass and that they would be happy to empty their pockets for us, offer us their daughters and personally bow before the greatness that was the Ikari Clan.
Ok, ok...maybe, just maybe I embellished just a little.
Most of those guys were too ugly to have children. They wouldn't have a prayer of a chance with any girl long enough to get her name before getting kicked in the balls on the general basis of being such hideous bastards, let alone spending the night with one.
There wasn't enough booze in the world for that.
But anyway... The Gun Shop Crew liked what they heard and Kudi's daughter gave her grudging respect.
"Fine, you can stay with us for awhile. If your hungry we've got so food in the next room." Of course this got Toji's attention so the girl led the way and we followed.
"So tell me about yourselves. Your gun skill tells me that you've been on the streets for a while. Who are you three, really?"
"Why don't you tell us about yourself as well?" That was from Ken. He had this dreamy look in his eyes, but his prescription shades hid it well. Trust a Section 2 agent to have prescription black sun glasses.
"Yeah, your dad runs a gun store, so what's with the rest of the crew?" I had to add in. I just didn't get their operation. It might be something that the clan needed to get into.
"You answer mine and I'll answer yours."
"Sure." We were at the table by then and Toji was stuffing his face. "We run with one of the gangs around here, doing odd jobs now and then. We got caught at the bank on our way to see one of our folk when those things started attacking each other."
"Is this all you have?" She pointed to Ken and Toji.
"No, there are a few others, but I don't know where they're at right now." Fumi nodded in understanding.
"Well, as for us" she began, "to keep it simple we're Mercs. Somebody will request our services for some job and if we like the price we do it. It's as simple as that."
"I see." I would have said more, but Tunde came in looking for Fumi.
"Someone's here, come on." We all gave each other a look and loaded up just in case.
"It's always something in this city isn't it." Aida complained as we all followed the AK-47 holding queer mercenary.
When we came into the room everyone was set up in defensive positions, ready for whoever was coming through that door. We were no exception. I had already ordered Aida and Suzuhara into position and was waiting like the others as Fumi went to open the door.
Judging from her expression it wasn't as dangerous as we had thought, but whoever it was had said something that caught her attention. As she escorted the person in I figured the sight of us all locked and loaded would have freaked them out. A room full of nervous guys with automatic rifles, shotguns and submachine guns will do that to poelpe.
Yet when the two walked in these were the farthest thoughts from my head.
"Misato?" There dressed in her usual red bomber jacket and figure hugging black dress that had caused a total of 12564 car accidents from a glance on the street just last year alone was the one and only Misato Katsuragi.
"Shinji-kun, there you are. We were so worried." Toji and Kensuke were both looking like two doped up fools so I knew my own face had to be just as lost. I could already here the jealous mutterings from the rest of the Gun Shop Mercenaries.
"Um, what the hell?"
"Hey Ikari time to go." And Kaji was with her it seemed.
"Father, you had better come here." Fumi's father came immediately, shotgun ready.
"So, what's the probl... Ryouji?"
"Kudi?"
"What are you doing here?"
"What do you mean 'what am I doing here, this is my place? What are you doing here?"
"I came for them?" The head of Section 2 said pointing to us.
"Oh, so this kid works for you?" Kudi gave me a look.
"No, I work for him." That got everyone's attention especially Fumi and Tunde.
"Hey Ikari, hurry your ass up!" Aghh, so Asuka was here too.
"Yes Ikari-kun, we must hurry." And Rei as well.
"Section 2 has located the item, Boss Ikari sir."
"And if we don't hurry we may lose it again."
"But of course if you'd like to spend some time alone with us, we wouldn't mind, sir." Horaki and the rest of the clan of course.
"No the hell you wont!" Only Asuka could scream like that.
I couldn't help but sweat drop and give another mental sigh. They were outside and I could still here there voices. How could they yell that loud.
"Cherr up Boss," Toji said while giving me a pat on the back.
"Yeah, maybe they'll kill each other off and then it'll just be us again?" Ken tried to help out too. But Toji saw the flaw just as I did.
"Not likely, and besides Big Red might just decided to waste us all and go back to Russia."
"Germany."
"Whatever, same thing."
"Good point, but she wouldn't leave Ayanami here alone with the boss."
"And it's not like she could actually kill her. Rei's too good for that."
"True, true."
The rest of the Gun Shop Mercenaries just looked on us in confusion probably wondering just who the hell were we.
"Uncle Ryouji, long time no see." Fumi was saying to our Kaji.
"Oh, hey Fumi. You've grown quite a bit since I last saw you."
"I didn't know you had a niece Kaji?" Misato looked at the S2 agent in shock.
"Yeah, well now you know. So how you doing kid?"
"Fine, the business is doing well."
"I'm sure."
"So, are you going to explain what's going on here?" The fallen angel of the Gun Shop Mercs asked.
"Um, maybe later."
"Maybe now." She was fondling her pistol again. The look she gave the man more or less got her point across.
The unshaven man looked from one women to the other. "You sure you two haven't met."
"No Kaji. Now I sorry we couldn't stay longer for your little family reunion, but we have business to deal with, remember, so lets hurry up and be out. And that means you too Shinji-kun."
"Hey Shinji," Kaji was saying to me. "you'd better go check on your Harlem, they seem to be ..." the pistol in his face cut off whatever else he was going to say. "Geting restless." Okay maybe not.
"Ok kid, chill." Even with a gun to his head the man was still as smooth as ever.
"Please, I swear, I'd rather deal with my father."
"Isn't that a bit harsh?" I just looked at him.
"Well, maybe not, but still, you're the only one that can keep them under control." He gave me a smile and I shoved the gun harder on his face.
"Hey Boss, here." Toji and Aida started handing me their pieces with some extra ammo. "You might need it man." Toji said. I thanked them both and gave them a hand shake. We said our farewells and Kensuke asked if he could have my stereo system. I told him it's all in the will.
I was positive no one outside of the clan knew what was going on. Here Suzuhara and Aida were acting as if they were sending me to my death in all seriousness. Maybe to someone else it may have seemed funny. I would like to have met that person... and thanked him profusely with my Berettas for thinking my situation was in any way funny.
But whatever, I think I'm diverging from the point or going on a tangent again. Sorry. Ok let's see what was the point... hmm... the point... the point...?
Oh, yeah, the point! Asuka and the girls. How could I forget.
"At the door I took a calming breath, straitened my jacket anD brushed off my collar for imaginary dust.
"Hey Kaji." one last thing needed to addressed.
"Yeah?"
"We might need new replacements soon."
"I'LL get right on it."
I stepped outside in the night air, unto the stage and into the waiting hoards.
"Ikari-san!"
"Boss Ikari, sir!"
"Ikari-kun."
"IKARI!"
And the crowd screamed my name, anticipating a stunning performance.
Inside the Gun Shop the others talked amongst themselves for a while, but the initial sounds of gun shots and the answering fire told the story of how well things had progressed.
Ah, a night in Tokyo 3. It was always a 'memorable' occasion.