Chapter 10: Truth

The sun was again – or still – shining high above in the sky when Sakura woke up in an unfamiliar room. She was still wearing her pajamas which she'd been wearing yesterday. Her left ankle hurt when she got up from the bed, but her headache was even worse. She opened the door and was greeted with a cheerful: „Good morning, Sakura-chan! You slept like forever!"

„Kakashi-sensei..."

„Don't call me that. I'm not your teacher any more. Just call me Kakashi," he scolded her with a smile beneath his mask. But she didn't have the nerve to discuss that. Her gaze fell upon the couch where she saw a blanket and a pillow. So he had left the bed to her and slept on the couch. She smiled slightly. How nice of him...

She sat down on a chair and he brought her a glass of water. It helped somewhat against her headache and the awful sickness. He took a seat opposite of her and said nothing. Sakura felt uncomfortable all of a sudden. He had seen her in such an embarassing, pitiful state. „I'm sorry...," she muttered.

„For what?"

„I must've looked quite pathetic yesterday," she explained depressedly. „I was really relieved that you were there. Oh... why were you there anyway?"

„Actually I wanted to talk to Sasuke about some mission. He came out of the house and told me to take a look at you." Once again he looked unnaturally serious. „Sakura, do you finally realize that I was right? You have to leave him. He will destroy you."

She shook her head, but she couldn't bring herself to say something. She wanted to disagree with his words, but she couldn't. Because he was right. She was already at the verge of hating Sasuke.

Kakashi sighed and got up. „Come with me."

Sakura stared at him. „What?"

„Just follow me. I want to show you something." Obediantly she followed him and he led her to the bathroom. There he grabbed her shoulders and placed her in front of a mirror. Sakura could not look at herself. She looked awful. Kakashi said seriously: „Look at yourself, Sakura. You used to be so pretty. Your smile was so beautiful. What happened to that smile? You're too thin, your eyes are always red from crying and your skin is pale. Is that what you want?" He was right, every word was true. She hated herself. Especially that bitter look on her face that reminded her all too much of Sasuke. „Do you remember how you told me that you liked yourself when you were with him? Is that still true, Sakura? Do you still like yourself, the way you became?"

Quickly she shook her head no. „No! I hate that person in the mirror. And I hate... him. What he became."

„Then why are you still doing this to yourself?"

„I loved him. And a part of that love has remained in my heart. I cannot leave him," she said honestly. „I promised to help him. He has always fought for me. And now I fight for him. For his dreams."

„He will never be happy. As long as he can't let go of the past, even a family, a new Uchiha clan, cannot help him. Don't you understand that?", Kakashi insisted. „If Naruto were here, he'd say the same. Before he left he told me to take care of you."

That explained why Kakashi was acting so weird lately. Sakura nodded. „I'm not sure myself what I'm going to do. I don't want to go to my parents. Would it be a problem if I stayed here for a while? Just until I feel better and able to make a decision."

„Of course not. Stay as long as you want to."

***

Sakura didn't regret her decision to stay with Kakashi. Not having to see Sasuke and suffer from his cold eyes did her good. Most of the time Kakashi wasn't at home, but when he was, he talked to her, it was like he really cared about what she had to say. At least he didn't look right through her, like her own husband did.

There was no alcohol in the household. At first she was tempted to go out and buy some, but then she remembered why she was at this place. She didn't want to end like that again. She never wanted to let Sasuke humiliated her again. She vowed to never touch any alcohol again. No matter how painful it was, she had to go on without it.

After some days she even resumed eating. Living with Kakashi was so relaxing that her stomach calmed down and she gained some weight. In the meantime, Naruto had returned to the village and offered her to stay with him, which she had denied thankfully. He also told her how much better she looked and that he'd been worried about her. It felt good. It felt so good to be seen by someone, to have someone who cared.

Of course she couldn't stay with Kakashi forever. And she couldn't stay with Naruto either, his apartment was even smaller. Under no circumstances she wanted to go to her parents. And going back home, back to Sasuke… that was a different topic. Sasuke didn't show up during the first few days. It wasn't like he wasn't there… he had returned from his mission after two days. But he didn't seem to care. Sakura was glad that she didn't have to see him. But it was also hurtful that he didn't miss her or try to get her back.

Then, eight days after Kakashi had pulled her out of her misery, Sasuke was standing in front of Kakashi's door in the evening. Kakashi opened up and when Sakura heard her husband's voice, she froze in place, hiding in the kitchen before he could see her. She tried to stay calm and listened to the two men talking.

"I know she's here," Sasuke said impatiently. "I want to talk to her!"

"Yeah but Sakura doesn't want to talk to you," Kakashi replied and Sakura could vividly imagine his arrogant grin beneath the mask. Hopefully it made Sasuke really angry. He should get a taste of his own medicine.

"Save it, Kakashi," Sasuke growled. "I want to talk to my wife, so get out of my way or bring her here."

Sakura was still standing motionlessly in the kitchen, unsure of what to do. On one hand she wanted to hear him out. But on the other hand she was also scared to face him once again. If she liked to admit it or not, Sasuke still had great influence on her. While she was still thinking of what to do, she heard Kakashi say: "You should leave Sakura alone for a while."

"Keep your advices for yourself, old man," Sasuke hissed. Then he obviously gave messing with Kakashi a second thought and he barked: "Then tell my wife to fucking let me know when I'm allowed to bother her again." Sakura could imagine him spinning around wordlessly and marching away. As if to verify her theory, Kakashi closed the door. Sasuke was gone.

And now Sakura ran out of the kitchen into the living room. She should have come out and talked to Sasuke. "Sasuke!", she called out half-heartedly and ran over to the window. All she saw was how he disappeared behind the corner. It was raining outside. Most likely he was already soaking wet. Kakashi approached her and she asked concernedly: "Did I do the right thing? I should have talked to him."

"If he wants to talk to you he can come to the academy too," Kakashi shrugged. "Although I guess his pride will keep him from that."

"True," she murmured and placed her fingertips on the cool windowglass. "It must have cost him a lot to come here." She leaned her head against the window. "I don't understand myself any more. I despise him but at the same time I think I still love him… what should I do?"

…tbc…

***

I really apologize for this chapter... I haven't read a lot of english stuff lately and that always shows clearly in my translations. God, I really need a beta-reader. If anyone wnats to volunteer, please contact me!