A few really obvious coughs from Jack and Samantha and Daniel became aware they had an audience – that wasn't their captors. " Oh, fuck, " Samantha cried out when she saw Jack – and the twenty men behind him. Her body was on fire, wanting to finish what she and Daniel had started, but her mind was suddenly very clear, having being dragged out of its cloudiness by the sheer degree of humiliation.
She would never live this down. It would have been one thing for the Stargate Command to know what had happened to her and Daniel while on Dorsal ; it was entirely another for twenty of them, including Jack – and was that McKay at the back? How did he wrangle himself a position on the mission? – to witness them doing it.
" Jack! " Daniel yelled when he realised a second after Samantha did what was going on. " Get the hell out of here! "
Almost as embarrassed as they were, Jack called for a hasty retreat – although some were less then hasty. He glared at the Dorsa leader. " Why the hell didn't you warn us? " he demanded.
The Dorsa leader looked at Jack blankly. " It didn't seem relevant, you demanded them back – immediately. "
Jack was sure the smarmy bastard had done this deliberately. Carter and Daniel would never live this down, Carter especially. " Where are their clothes? " he demanded.
" In storage. We were going to give them back – when we gave them back. "
" Well, I'm taking them back right now so you go and give their clothes back, " Jack demanded. He got the definite feeling he was losing control of the situation. Poor Daniel. Poor Samantha. He doubted he could ever look at them the same again.
Obediently, the Dorsa leader scurried away, no doubt glad to be away from Jack O'Neill, who looked very pissed off and capable of murder right now. Jack turned to the other twenty members of the rescue mission. " Not…a…word, " he said, with a look that reminded him he was experienced in black ops, he knew how to make murder look like an accident. He sent a particularly evil look in McKay's direction.
Inside the room – now mercifully closed – Samantha was on the verge of a panic attack. It was actually quite scary to watch, he wasn't used to cool, calm Samantha Carter getting hysterical, and if it wasn't for their present circumstances, Daniel would have ordered Jack in here to deal with it. Daniel swallowed his own temptation to fall to pieces. " It's going to be OK, " he said. God, that sounded so lame. This was everything she'd been worried about, only ten times as bad. In her scenario, they'd made their own way back to Earth – fully clothed – to explain, in very general terms, what had happened to them – not Jack and twenty other members of the Stargate Command walking in on her flat on her back with her ankles locked around Daniel's neck.
Oh, God she felt like such a whore. Oh, God she was going to be sick.
" Sam? " Daniel asked, now very worried. " Do you need me to get Jack? "
Samantha glared at him and struggled to control the urge to throw up before Daniel thought the best thing to do was get Jack involved. That was definitely not a good idea.
" It's going to be OK, " he said lamely.
Samantha glared at him again. " How is it going to be OK? " she asked hysterically. " This is the worst possible thing that could have happened. I will never live this down. " She started to cry and she hated herself for her weakness.
Daniel drew her into his arms. " I told you I wouldn't abandon you, " he reminded her gently. " Do you remember? " she nodded. " Good, because I meant it. I know this is about the worst that could happen but we'll deal with it together – OK? " Samantha nodded again. " Good girl. " Daniel leaned over to kiss her softly. " We'll get through this, I promise. " She threw herself into his arms in a needy hug.
He inhaled, and he could feel her scent all around him – she smelled of sex, of him. It was a heady smell. It immediately reminded him of what they'd been doing before they'd been interrupted. " I think I need a cold shower before I can go anywhere, " he commented, wincing.
Samantha felt the effect she had on him. Right now, she was feeling too sorry for herself to be preoccupied with it, and besides, if she was, she could get away without it being obvious. Daniel couldn't. " Let me, " she whispered softly, sliding off the bed onto her knees.
" I don't want you to do this, " Daniel whispered hoarsely. His body told her he did. " It's degrading. "
No more then what I've already done, Samantha thought. " Just sit back and enjoy it, " she directed him. " And done make any noise. "
She finished him off quickly, before the Dorsa leader returned with their clothes. He hoisted her back onto the bed. " I told you I didn't want you to do that, " he said, his eyes full of remorse. Once more, he'd used her.
" But you feel better, don't you? " she challenged.
" That's not the point, " Daniel said. He did feel better, and he hated himself for it. He had used her to satisfy his sexual desires… even if she had wanted to do it for him… that didn't matter. " You shouldn't have been subjected to it… to this whole thing. "
Samantha smiled gently. " It's OK, " she said. " Consider it helping out a friend in need. "
He smiled ruefully. " You're too good to me, " he said.
She hugged him, and at that moment the Dorsa leader reappeared with their clothes. " Get dressed and get out of here, " the leader directed. " We never want to see your kind again. "
" As I remember, you kidnapped us, " Daniel couldn't help but reminded the leader. He got a glare for his pains. Daniel wondered what Jack had on him. Probably threatened to hand out the co-ordinates to this planet to whoever wanted it, knowing Jack. Daniel would have been more diplomatic, but it got results.
Actually, come to think of it, he wasn't sure if he was happy with these results. Right now, he'd be quite happy to spend a few more months here and be sent home when the Dorsa had no further use for them then have to face the twenty-one dirty-minded men out there.
Well, what was done was done, they couldn't exactly tell Jack and co to go home. Daniel supposed he should be grateful for the effort they must have gone to, although it was hard for any other emotion to penetrate his deep embarrassment.
And come to think of it, something like this sounded like McKay's doing. Daniel wondered what he expected in return.
Facing the men was absolute torture. Clearly, Jack had threatened bodily harm if they said anything, but that didn't stop a few smirks and knowing looks from escaping. Daniel was tempted to quit the Stargate Command there and then and spent the rest of his life on Dorsal ; it couldn't be any worse then this.
Discreetly, he pushed Samantha behind him, threading his fingers through hers reassuringly. He didn't particularly care that it was an obvious display of affection ; it wasn't like things could get any worse then they were now.
Holding hands unashamedly, Daniel and Samantha trailled behind the rest of the group, refusing to be part of it and the whispers they knew were being exchanged. This was simply too good to obey Jack's orders to keep their mouths shut. Daniel and Samantha supposed that was just human nature but that didn't make it any easier on them.
They got back to the gate with no problems – idly Daniel wondered just how many races the Dorsa had made enemies off to grant them such a uneventful return home – and dialled home. As they were stepping towards the event horizon, Daniel felt Samantha grip his fingers in apprehension. " It's OK, " he whispered to her. " I promised, and I don't reneg on my promises. " When Jack wasn't looking, he planted a quick kiss on her forehead. Not that the inter-military fraternisation thing would matter for much longer ; under the influence or not, Daniel doubted Hammond would let them stay on the same team after this.
He didn't say that to Samantha, though. Instead he smiled reassuringly and tried to wince when her nails dug into his skin. " Ready? " he asked. Samantha nodded, still apprehensive but feeling a little better knowing Daniel was by her side through this. She took a deep breath, and they walked through the gate…
Hammond and Janet Fraiser were waiting for them on the other side. Both of them looked clearly relieved that Daniel and Samantha had returned, looking more or less in one piece, although thorough physicals would determine just how well they were.
No-one failed to miss that Daniel and Samantha had come through the gate holding hands, but for Janet, who knew them personally quite well – Samantha especially – it went deeper then most people saw. Circumstances had forced them to become very close in the last month, and now that they were back to their normal environment, it was hard to say what would happen to their relationship.
Logically, she knew they needed to be separated. They'd been each other's world for a month, under the influence of God knew what. Right now, the best thing for them was to be separated and given time to clear their heads. But Janet saw that was easier said then done.
" We can't do it together? " Daniel asked plaintively when Janet approached them on the subject. " Please. " he gripped Samantha's hand a little tighter. In the month that had passed, he'd always been the one reassuring her, but now he was beginning to realise how much her presence meant to him. He didn't know what to do with her out of his sight.
" It's for the best, " Janet reassured them. " You both need time apart to get your systems cleared. " She said this in a voice that brooked no argument, and reluctantly Daniel pulled his hand away from Samantha's.
" Tell me exactly what happened, Sam, " Janet said, as sympathetically as she could. Samantha was starting to show the emotional strain of being separated from Daniel, as well as something else. Janet wasn't to know the effect of the hormones still in her system was driving her crazy, increasingly more with every passing moment. About this time, she and Daniel would be thrashing around in bed. Instead, she was getting a thorough physical which was humiliating. Samantha didn't know why she was bothering to tell Janet what had happened, she was sure there was plenty of evidence on her to tell the story perfectly well.
Janet was aware of Samantha's obvious embarrassment, and she tried to remain professional despite her friend's discomfort. Janet had given her physicals before, but this was different. Samantha had never had a physical following a month of virtually nonstop sex, let alone had to tell the story to a close friend.
" Why don't you just let the evidence tell the story, " she said shortly. " I'm sure there's plenty of it. "
Janet stopped what she was doing to look Samantha in the eye. " I know this must be hard for you, " she said sympathetically. " But it's important that we know what happened. I'm not here to judge you, but if you want, you can do this with another doctor. "
Samantha shook her head. This was going to be awkward no matter who examined her, and at least Janet wouldn't judge her, which was more then she could say for most of the people on this base. She bet there were maybe a dozen people who wouldn't think of her as some raving nymphomaniac. And everyone else would think she was a slut, and being the deep-down hypocrites that they were, that Daniel was a stud.
Daniel… God, she wished her were here with her. For a month he hadn't been out of her sight except for a few minutes every day when the Dorsa gave them their shots. Hmmm, that was something, Samantha had never worked out what the second shot was. The first one she figured was some kind of hormone stimulant, they felt the effects of that pretty quickly, but the second one neither of them had felt any effects from.
She was confused about her relationship with Daniel, and she wanted him to be here with her. They had become very close, but had it just been because of the sex thing? Screwing someone for a month created its own kind of intimacy that could easily be confused with love.
" Sam? " Janet pressed, seeing her friend was lost in her thoughts – probably of Daniel. " What are you thinking about? "
" Daniel, " Samantha admitted. " He was pretty much my universe while we were – being held – and I don't know what to do without him. He said he'd support me. "
" I'm sure he will, " Janet reassured her. " But you have to understand from my point of view, I don't think it's a good idea for you to be together right now. " Samantha nodded unhappily, not really agreeing with her but knowing argument was pointless. " Now, why don't you tell me what happened? "
Reluctantly, slowly, Samantha related all the details of her month with Daniel. All the while, the hormones in her system were driving her crazier. " Sorry, " she said sheepishly when she realised Janet was looking at her, concerned. " It's been… longer then usual. "
" Do you know how often they gave you the shots? " Janet asked, knowing Samantha had an excellent instinct for time. She could be anywhere without a watch or even the sun's cycle to rely on and could keep a pretty good sense of time.
" It felt like about a day, " Samantha said. " The intervals were pretty regular – " as a scientist, that hadn't surprised her, and it had given her a time frame to work with " – and it was about thirty, thirty-five times, " she said. That was close to as many days as it had taken the Stargate Command to find and rescue them.
Janet nodded. " I'm just guessing here, but I'd say that means the effect of the hormones will wear off within a day, " she said. Not before things got a lot worse for them, though, but she opted not to mention that. " I'd like to take a few blood and urine tests to see if I can isolate what it was they gave you. " She hated the idea of cashing in on Samantha and Daniel's misfortune, but she could only imagine the applications that such a hormone treatment could have, if she could recreate it.
Samantha nodded, and complied with everything Janet asked for. " I'm going to put you in isolation for a while, " Janet said. " I think it's for the best that you don't interact with people until the effects of this hormone have worn off. " She didn't add that Samantha looked terrible, haunted. There was a hungry look in her eyes that made Janet think the best thing for her was to be away from any men who might think to take advantage of that.
" I want to see Daniel, " she said pathetically.
" That's not a good idea, " Janet replied patiently. " You can see him when you're both over this… thing. "
Samantha started to cry. " I need to see him, " she insisted.
" Sam, " Janet said in a low, firm voice. " Don't make me get security. " She felt sorry for her friend and for a moment questioned her decision to separate the two of them. If it wasn't for the hormones still in their systems, she wouldn't hesitate to let them be together. She figured Daniel was in a similar sorry state to Samantha. But she thought about how Hammond would feel if she allowed them to be together – and she was sure, once they were together, they would contrive a way to be alone – when they still had the hormones in their systems. She decided she would much rather have Daniel and Samantha jacked off at her then Hammond. " No, " she said, more firmly then before.
Samantha's face fell, but she didn't do anything to resist Janet's orders. She followed the doctor to one of the converted isolation rooms. " Is there anything you need? " Janet asked from the doorway as Samantha sat down, looking very sorry for herself.
" Daniel? " Samantha asked listlessly, and turned her head so she wouldn't have to see the pitying look in Janet's eyes. As an afterthought she added, " How did I check out? "
" Sam, the human body isn't designed to have that much sex for such a long period of time, " Janet told her honestly. " You're showing some pretty bad friction burns that I would have expected, that will heal in a few days, and I'd say in a few hours as the hormones start to wear off you'll start to realise how exhausted you are. I assume you didn't get a good night's sleep the whole time you were there? "
Samantha shook her head morosely, suddenly feeling very ashamed. Sometimes they'd been able to drift off to sleep for an hour or two but the urges always came back. At the time they'd been too preoccupied to notice, but Janet was right – the human body wasn't designed to take the kind of treatment that had been through.
Through the dimness of her brain preoccupied by sex, she had a vauge notion that only a whore would be able to work through injury and sleep deprivation to get laid. She wished Daniel was here so he could tell her otherwise. She hadn't realised what a comfort he'd been until right now, when she wanted – needed – him the most.
Janet stood in the doorway, unsure of what to do. The doctor in her knew the best thing for Samantha was time by herself to let the effects of the hormones wear off ; the friend in her wanted to hash it out with Samantha until the woman she knew returned from this pathetic, morose daze she was in. Finally, the doctor in her won out and she left Samantha to her own devices, telling her to call the infirmary if she wanted anything. Somehow, she knew that wouldn't be happening. Right now, Samantha didn't care about Janet. She didn't care about anything or anyone but Daniel.
With a sigh, Janet went to see Daniel, who's doctor had had the same idea and put him in isolation until the effects of the hormones wore off. He was curled up in a corner, his head resting on his knees and his arms wrapped around himself.
He looked up when he heard to door open, and from across the room Janet could see his blue eyes fade when he saw who it was. She tried not to take it personally ; it was clear even from several meters away that there was only one person he wanted to see.
" I've been told to stay here for my own good, " he said wryly. " That, and the good of the females on this base. " He tried to smile, but his smile came out as more of a grimace. From how Samantha had described the urges, and how they build up the longer it took for them to be sated, Daniel must be in hell right now.
" You'll thank us for it when you come out of it, " Janet promised. The look he gave her was one of disbelief.
" How's Sam doing? " he asked.
" I'd say about as well as you – or as bad as you, depending on how you look at it, " Janet replied. " I expect you'll both crash in a few hours from exhaustion. " She decided not to tell Daniel about Sam's other injuries. " What did Doctor Brown say? "
" Exhaustion, sleep deprivation, a few other things, " Daniel recited dispassionately. His was trying to keep his mind off the very attractive woman standing a few meters away from him. He was glad she was a few meters away. He didn't trust himself if she got within arm's reach. With a wry smile he added, " and he said I defied science with my ability to perform and every man in the world would want to get hold of that – whatever it was they gave us. "
" My ex husband could have used some of it, " Janet joked. Privately, she was interested in following up on Daniel's recovery – it wasn't physiologically possible for a man to perform like that in one night, let alone consistently over that period of time. He had to pay for it somewhere along the track. She took a step towards him so she was close enough that he could smell her perfume. He hadn't thought about it before, but he realised that Janet wore perfume. And a damn sexy one at that. He felt his body react instantly, exacerbating the crazy horniness he was already feeling.
" Janet, get out, " he growled, afraid of what might happen if she got any closer to him. Clearly, it wasn't just Samantha who he wanted – any woman would do. He'd already treated one dear friend like a whore, he wasn't about to do it again.
Janet looked quizzically at him. The last time she'd heard that tone of voice from him was when he'd gotten radiation poisoning on Langara and didn't want to infect anyone else. " Daniel? " she asked uncertainly.
" Get away from me before I do something I regret, " he ordered, and Janet understood from the tone in his voice and the crazy look in his eye that he had good reason to be afraid of himself right now. Hell, she had good reason to be afraid of him right now. She backed away, retreating to the door.
" I'm sorry, " he mumbled when she made her exit. It was clear from his tone he hated himself right now.
" It's not your fault, " Janet replied sincerely. She wasn't sure if Daniel believed her.
Daniel's reaction to her deeply disturbed her. She didn't blame him, but nonetheless, she shuddered to think of what might have happened if she'd gotten any closer to him. She decided to go and check on Samantha. She was no doubt going through the same thing, and would need a friend.
McKay had been trying to find someone who would update him on Samantha and Daniel, but no-one would say anything. He just knew Jack had told everyone to keep their mouths shut – that was typical of the Colonel, never mind the only reason Samantha and Daniel were home at all was because of McKay, he considered the scientist beneath him and as such wasn't entitled to know anything. Well, McKay was a brilliant man and there was more then one way to find out what he wanted to know.
He paid a visit to Major Carter.
He had always found her attractive. There was a turn-on about a woman who was almost a match for your intelligence. Especially one who was as attractive and ballsy as Samantha was.
Seeing her stark naked and in the throes of passion had been an image he hadn't been able to get out of his mind, not that he wanted to. Although he had conveniently erased Daniel from his memory and focused on what it would be like to be in bed with Samantha. She'd be a real hellcat, he thought.
It was easy enough for McKay to get past the guards at Samantha's door, who hadn't been told exactly why they were guarding her – Janet had thought the less people who knew the better. They'd only been told not to let anyone in without her permission, but after all, it had been McKay who had found the two of them, he was entitled to talk to Samantha, his fellow scientist. He wasn't armed and Samantha really knew how to give a man hell for getting too close, how much harm could he do?
When Samantha saw McKay, she was hit by two instincts. One was to politely thank him for working out where they were being held, and then not-so-politely tell him to go to hell, where she was sure Satan had a special place for chauvinists. The other was a reminder of her initial attraction to him. He had driven her nuts with his 'dumb blond' comments, but it had kind of been a rush to work with someone who was smarter then her. It had been a challenge to get the better of him, and Samantha had always gotten off on challenges.
And while he wasn't absolutely hunky, he wasn't dog-ugly either. Samantha recalled thinking Daniel was kind of geeky-looking when she'd first met him. Subconsciously, she licked her lips and couldn't help but staring at McKay's mouth, wondering what his kiss would feel like. Clearly, it wasn't just Daniel who she wanted – any man would do.
" You look like crap, " was the first thing McKay remarked on, in typical McKay fashion. Although she had a wild look in her eyes that distracted him from her dishevelled appearance. Like a tigress. Or a hellcat.
" You always knew how to make a girl feel good about herself, " Samantha retorted huskily. She wasn't offended by his comment – she knew he was checking her out, the way his eyes roamed her body freely. Rather then kick his ass, she looked defiant – almost inviting.
" You never needed me to make you feel good about it, you always thought you were hot stuff, " McKay returned, slowly taking steps closer to her. By now she should have kicked his ass for such a provocative statement. She hadn't, so clearly she wanted him. McKay had always thought Samantha had wanted him – hadn't she admitted to being attracted to him when they first met?
" I think you're the one who thought I was hot stuff, " Samantha retorted. Nope, she definitely wasn't acting like herself. Maybe she'd finally come to her senses, or lowered that snooty reserve of hers.
" Maybe I did, " McKay returned, the way he stared at her confirming this. He quite liked this game they were playing, circling each other, silently daring each other to make the first move.
Samantha did, virtually throwing herself against McKay and kissing him. He had never been with such an aggressive woman, let alone one who ranked so high in the airforce and didn't need his help with anything. And he quite liked it. He wasted no time kissing her back. His hands roamed her body with almost the same urgency that she was touching him. He inhaled, and noticed she was suspiciously clean. Good. The last thing he wanted was any traces of that archaeologist geek on her.
In no time, their kisses had become very steamy, and he pushed her onto a bed, climbing on top of her. She moaned in delight when he moved his hands inside her shirt, feeling the bare skin, moving his hands upwards to feel her breasts. She was only too eager to respond in kind. Secretly, he'd always thought Samantha Carter was a closet nympho, and this only proved it. He'd always known she wanted him.
" McKay, " she growled when he tugged off her shirt and began kissing her breasts, arching her back to meet him.
" Rodney, " he corrected, his hand wandering roughly downwards. She didn't seem to mind being dominated ; in fact she seemed to want it. McKay wasn't surprised. High-ranking females officers always wanted to be dominated.
" Rodney, " she gasped when he slid his hand between her legs. She was so hot for him she'd call him anything, he thought, his ego inflating when he felt how wet she was. He was far too arrogant to think it wasn't his doing but the hormones in her system.
He returned to playing with her breasts, enjoying making her squirm, gasping and moaning in delight as he fingered her. " You want me, babe? " he asked teasingly.
" Yes, " Samantha said gutturally. " Oh, God, yes… please… "
He had never had a woman beg for it before, and it was the biggest turn on. He was going to nail Major Carter, and she was begging for it. He began undoing his pants.
" Rodney McKay, what the hell do you think you're doing? " came the very outraged voice of Doctor Janet Jackson, a woman McKay had clashed with in the past. You gave a woman enough IQ points to get to medical school and suddenly she was too good for any man.
McKay stared at her. " I would have thought it was pretty obvious, " he responded. Then, just in case Janet got any ideas that he'd forced himself onto Samantha he added, " she wanted it. "
" She's in no position to consent, " Janet snapped. This was low, even by McKay's chauvinistic standards. " Sorry for giving you enough credit to think you knew that. "
" Hey! " McKay said indignantly, scrambling up. " I came in here to talk to her and she threw herself at me! I know what the effects of drugs are, that's not it, " he added sullenly. He had learned from bitter experience that consent all on its own wasn't enough to escape a rape charge.
Janet stared at him, unable to believe the sheer arrogance of McKay. " You honestly thought you made her horny all on your own? " she asked.
" Well, yeah, " McKay responded. In his defence, Janet realised, he really had been basing his judgement on his previous experience with drugged women – glazed eyes, slurred speech, lack of co-ordination, none of which Samantha displayed. Which kind of made sense, because she wasn't under the influence of any drug, per se. If you didn't know any better – which McKay should have – it would be easy to think Samantha was in a position to give consent. By his own perverted definition, he was innocent.
" Get out, " Janet ordered.
" I didn't do anything! " he complained indignantly.
" Rodney McKay, get the hell out of my sight before I have you court-martialled, " Janet threatened. " Or better yet, I'll inform Doctor Jackson of this. "
That got McKay's attention ; the last thing he wanted was Daniel going territorial on him. " Fine, " he spat, feeling he was being made out to be the villain. He stormed off, sulking.
" Are you OK? " Janet asked, turning her back so Samantha could put her top back on. Damn those stupid guards, she should have made herself clearer.
" Fine, " Samantha mumbled, wanting to curl up and died. She had almost had sex with Rodney McKay – and the only thing that had stopped her was Janet's intervention, not her own. She was such a slut. She started to cry.
" Hey, " Janet said, reaching out to hug Samantha. " It wasn't your fault. I can't believe he was so thick, he should have known better. "
" You don't understand, " Samantha sobbed. " I feel like a whore. Right now, I feel like I'd do any man who would have me. "
" That's why I put you in here, for your own safety, " Janet said softly. " Sam, listen to me, if you'd been given Rohypnol, you'd know you were responsible for anything you did, yes? " Tearfully, Samantha nodded. " It's the same principle, you're not in a position to be responsible for your actions. What McKay did was wrong and I'll see he gets reprimanded for it, but it was not your fault. "
" It feels like it is, " Samantha cried.
" Well, it's not. Sam, this will wear off soon – it has to. And after that, I'll let you see Daniel – that's what you really want, isn't it? "
Samantha nodded. " I know no-one will believe us, but we became really close while we were – there. There were times, after we'd had sex, that things felt almost normal, and we'd talk a lot. He was my universe. I don't know what to do with him not here. "
Janet decided not to say she thought Daniel felt the same way. She'd let them sort it out when they were both in a position to think clearly.
Which reminded her… " I've got to go and see Daniel about something, " she told Samantha. " I'll be back in ten minutes, OK? "
Samantha shook her head. " I'd rather be alone right now, " she said softly.
Janet thought about trying to penetrate the wall Samantha's thoughts lay behind, but she realised it wasn't her Samantha wanted to talk to. She sighed, wishing there was some way she could give Samantha and Daniel what they wanted – each other. But that wasn't an option, and a day apart wouldn't hurt them. " You call me if you need anything, " she said, leaving Samantha to her thoughts.
Daniel looked as bad as when she'd left him, possibly worse. " I brought you something, " she said, producing a box of tissues and a tube of lubricant. " I know it's not Sam, but – "
He smiled weakly. " Thanks, " he said. " How is she? "
" OK, given the circumstances, " Janet said vaguely. She decided not to tell him about McKay ; let him get worked up about it when he was thinking straight.
" I promised I'd be there for her, I feel like I'm letting her down, " Daniel said sadly.
" She said something like that, what's that about? " Janet asked.
" She's worried… about her reputation, and what people are going to say about her. There were times when we were thinking almost straight, and we talked about a lot of stuff… she was convinced there would be a lot of people who wouldn't believe she hadn't had a choice, would call her a slut… I promised I wouldn't let that happen, that I'd support her… and I'm not. "
" You know this is for your own good, don't you? " Janet asked.
Daniel sighed. " In my head, I do. But in my heart… for a month it was just the two of us in this crazy, intimate situation. I don't like not having her around. "
" It won't be for long, the hormones should wear off soon. Then I promise you can see each other… hash things out. Do you – do you want to talk about it? "
" No, thankyou, " Daniel said quietly. Like with Samantha, it was obvious there was only one person he wanted to talk to. " I'd like to be alone, if you don't mind. "
" Of course I don't. If you want anything, just call me, " Janet said as she got up to go, leaving Daniel alone with his thoughts.
He thought a lot, especially after he brought himself a release. Masturbation was something of a let-down after the steamy month he'd spent with Samantha, but it was better then nothing. Once he had that release, it was a lot easier to think… and he didn't like a lot of the things that came to him.
He and Samantha had had sex sometimes ten times a day for the duration of their captivity. That wasn't humanly possible, only brought out by the hormones that were crammed into their systems. That was the first distinction Daniel failed to make – that they hadn't exactly been in a 'normal' situation.
He had a vauge memory of someone – probably Samantha, in one of her more feminazi moments – telling him that rape was having sex with someone who didn't consent, or wasn't in a position to consent, like when they were under the influence of a mind-altering substance. Well, those hormones they'd been pumped full of had well and truly altered their states of mind, making them insanely horny. His reaction to Janet was proof that it hadn't even about Samantha – it had just been about getting laid.
About fucking.
Oh, God, he had always hated that word. It was so… callous, describing an act of animals and lot love. Yeah, well, that's I did, Daniel told himself. You treated her like an animal, someone to satisfy your desire.
A memory of Samantha in his arms, screaming his name as she climaxed, came to him, but it brought him no salve to his burning conscience. It didn't matter that she'd wanted it, it mattered that she hadn't consented to it.
He had raped her. And he had treated her like a whore. He had dominated her, controlled her, treated like his own personally sex slave to satisfy his lust. She would have done anything for him, practically had, and he had taken shameless advantage of it. He felt the bile rise in his throat when he thought about how he had acted.
Crawling into bed, he curled into a tiny ball, regressing into his memories – and his guilt. Samantha would never want to see him again after this, after the way he had treated her. If she couldn't stand McKay because of a few chauvinistic remarks, he could only imagine how she'd feel about him when she came to her senses. They had been friends, she had trusted him, and how had he repaid her?
By raping her and treating her like a whore.
" Oh, God, " he whispered to himself, disgust and shame flooding through his body. He felt like scum, less then scum, for what he had done to her. She would never want to speak to him again, and he couldn't blame her.
After this was over, he wouldn't approach her. If she could find it in her heart to forgive him, which he doubted, she would approach him. But he wouldn't bring any more grief to her life, not after the crap he'd already heaped on her.
His heart ached at the idea of cutting all ties with Samantha. He loved her. But she deserved much better then him. After the way he had treated her, the least he owed her was to leave her alone.
As the effect of the hormones started to wear off, Daniel's exhausted body drifted off into a long but trouble sleep for almost twenty hours.
Samantha had a lot of time to think, and she didn't like the conclusions she came to.
She had acted like a whore when she'd been with Daniel. The hormones in her system had made her so horny, made her lose all inhibitions. She would have done anything he'd asked, and she was pretty sure she had.
She knew from bitter experience that men loved to fuck women who would do anything, but they rarely respected them.
Fucking… it was a euphemism she had grown up with, being in such a male-dominated institution, and one she had always hated. But there was no better word to describe how she'd been with Daniel. They had fucked like animals, she had acted like a whore.
She didn't think she could face him after that. And she had too much pride to pretend like everything was alright. She couldn't stand to pretend to be friends with Daniel when she knew he was secretly thinking she was a whore.
Only a whore would have done the things she'd done with Daniel and loved every sordid minute of it.
" Oh, God, " she sobbed, curling up into a little ball as the memories flooded back. When this was all over, she wasn't going to try and pretend like everything was as it had been with her and Daniel. If he could find it in himself to respect her, he would approach her. But she wouldn't go grovelling to him. She might have made herself his whore, but she still had some pride.
As the effect of the hormones started to wear off, Samantha's exhausted body drifted off into a long but trouble sleep for almost twenty hours.
Daniel and Samantha woke up within half an hour of each other, well rested in body, although their minds were filled with unpleasant thoughts. And their bodies ached.
" That makes sense, " Janet told both of them. " You've both had a pretty strenuous workout. Your muscles have been overworked. " She noticed both of them flinched at the reference, like they didn't want to think about it. They must both be feeling pretty low, not to mention embarrassed. She made a mental note to insist to Hammond that they be made to talk to the base phycologist before they be allowed back on missions.
She suggested that they might like to see each other, and their responses surprised her.
" I talk to him… later, " Samantha said vaguely. Like hell she was going to approach Daniel after the way she had behaved.
" It's not important, I'll see her around, " Daniel said, with equal vagueness. Like hell he was going to approach Samantha after the way he had behaved.
Janet had been surprised. " Are you sure? You seemed pretty keen yesterday. "
" Positive, " Daniel had said, trying far too hard to convince her.
" Absolutely, " Samantha had said, trying far too hard to convince her. Janet underlined the note in her head to talk to Hammond about them. Something had happened in the last twenty-four hours – they had gone from insisting they had to be together to being, at best, apathetic about a reunion – and more likely, they didn't want to see each other.
She let it go for the time being and scheduled follow-up physicals with both of them. " And I'd abstain from sex for a while, too, " she added the obvious. They both blushed when she said that.
"… They're both very embarrassed, that's to be expected, " Janet told Hammond later. " And there's something else there – they don't want to be with each other, and yesterday it was all they wanted. "
" Do you think that's going to be an issue? "
" It might be, it's hard to say. It might be nothing but just to be on the safe side I'm recommending they not go on any offworld missions until they've spoken to Doctor Ryan. "
" I think that's a very good idea, Doctor Fraiser, " Hammond agreed. " But maybe they might open up to you, as a friend? "
Janet made a face which made it clear she disagreed. " I think because I'm a friend they're not very likely to open up to me, " she said.
Samantha spent most of the next week holed up in her office, knowing everyone was talking about her. No-one would say anything to her face, of course, but she knew – she'd walk into a room, and the conversation would stop. People gave her looks which weren't difficult to interpret. And a couple of times she heard the words 'slut' 'whore' and 'nymphomaniac'. She had known they wouldn't understand. And she was pretty sure McKay was adding fuel to the fire with his version of events.
She tried not to let it affect her. They were just jealous of her success, jealous and resentful. And she might have been able to deal with it, if it wasn't for Daniel's aloofness.
He had promised her he'd stick by her, but he was nowhere to be seen. He spent a lot of time holed up in his office, throwing himself into his work. Obviously, he wanted nothing to do with her.
She was whore, someone to while away a few hours in bed but not someone you'd want to take home to your parents.
A few times the thought had reduced her to tears, but only ever in the privacy of her office. She would never show them how much they had hurt her.
Well, life went on. Hammond had ordered her to speak to the base phycologist, Doctor Ryan, which she had, making idle chit-chat to while the hour away. She did a good impression of a well-adjusted woman and went away with his recommendation that she was fit to return to offworld missions.
Janet wasn't so easily convinced, and behind Samantha's back she kept recommending against them both going offworld. There was just something off about their behaviour and she didn't think they were ready to be exposed to that kind of stress.
Of course, they'd had to be separated, something they both took very well – welcomed the news, even. Janet didn't understand it – neither did Jack. If nothing else, then SG-1 had an excellent camaraderie and while Daniel and Samantha might understand that after what had happened between them, they couldn't stay on the same team, they shouldn't have welcomed the decision.
At least it had been an easy one to make, who left the team. When Daniel heard they were being split up, he immediately volunteered to go. " I know there's been a lot of talk about Sam, to be honest, I'm concerned about her being with anyone but Jack and Teal'c. I know they understand what happened. "
So there it was, concern for Samantha – Janet knew it had to be down there somewhere. They couldn't have just switched off their feelings for each other. So why were they pretending they didn't care?
It didn't make any sense. She tried to talk to them, but they both clammed up at the first sign of a deep and meaningful.
The truth was, Daniel felt terrible for the way things had turned out for Samantha. It was easy enough for him, people thought he was a stud, a legend for nailing the great, aloof Samantha Carter. The men thought he was a legend for penetrating that aloofness, and the women thought he must have something legendary going for him if the aloof Samantha Carter jumped into bed for him.
No, it was easy enough for him to face the aftermath of his actions, but for Samantha – he told anyone who brought it up what had happened and he'd gotten into a few punch-ups with men who thought nothing of referring to 'that Carter slut' within his earshot (Janet used it as an excuse to keep him from going offworld, when he was fine) but it wasn't achieving anything.
If she'd have anything to do with him, he'd insist that she be with him, literally by his side. He was aware that their distance from each other was only heaping coals onto the fire – a sentiment along the lines of, if he has any respect for her, why isn't he standing by her? But Samantha wanted nothing to do with him, she had made that pretty clear. She stayed in her office so she wouldn't have to see him, when she passed him in the corridors she refused to make eye contact and when she was absolutely forced to exchange words with him, it was with a minimum of monosyllables.
He had tried to talk to her once, about the rumours. She had physically shrunk from him and insisted everything was OK. That had been his one and only attempt to patch things up with her.
She had been too proud to accept his charity. So he felt a little bad that her reputation was in tatters and he wanted to make it up to her. How, exactly? By pretending he still respected her. No, thanks. She'd much rather go it alone then accept the bones he threw her out of pity.
Aware of the sorry state of relations between Samantha and Daniel, Janet kept making excuses to keep them on Earth. She actually had a good reason – she was still trying to work out what the second substance was that Samantha and Daniel had been injected with each day.
It had been easy enough to isolate the two substances from their bloodwork. One of them was a hormone stimulant which made Viagra look like a placebo. Given its potency, she was quite impressed they'd held out as long as they did – twenty minutes would have been a lifetime against this thing.
There would be a huge market for it. It would be easy enough to recreate it. Not exactly the weapons the top brass was looking for, but it would certainly offset some of the mammoth costs involved with the Stargate program.
It was the second substance that had Janet stumped. It was only until Janet looked at it another way that she realised what it was.
The hormones that should have been in Samantha's system from her three-monthly birth control injections were nowhere to be found. Not a trace. It was like they had been completely obliterated.
It turned out, by a fertility drug that had a potency about a hundred times more then what was currently available, both on the market and being tested.
She approached Samantha about a fresh batch of tests, which Samantha complied with. " Have you found something? " she asked.
" Maybe, " Janet said vaguely. " I'll run some tests and get back to you. "
Two days later, she called Samantha into the privacy of her office. " Sit down, " she directed Samantha.
" What is it? " Samantha asked, immediately concerned by the tone in Janet's voice. " Is it about those new tests? "
Janet nodded. " I don't think you're going to like this, " she said gravely.
Samantha's heart caught in her throat. It couldn't possibly be worse then what she was already going through. " Please, " she begged. " Just tell me. "
" I worked out what the second substance was, " Janet said. " It's a fertility drug. You and Daniel were both given it. "
Samantha visibly paled. " I'm on birth control, " she whispered painfully.
Janet shook her head. " This drug – it's incredible. It's a hundred times more powerful then anything currently available. It could get just about anyone with a working uterus pregnant. The birth control you were on would have been about as effective as throwing a bucket of water on a bushfire. This drug you were given completely obliterated it. You're young, healthy – you probably conceived the first time you and Daniel had sex. "
" I'm pregnant, " Samantha said dully.