The Lands of Midlearth
Chapter 3
Ingenuity of an Ingenious Kind
Oh, this is just peachy. Ju-u-u-ust peachy. Morgan glumly thought as Legolas carried her through Mirrkwud. Or, rather, Sued!Legolas carried her through Mirrkwud.
"You'll like my palace, doll. My dad, Thranduil, is king, but, hey, I run everything in Mirrkwud," Legolas chattered. Morgan sulked in his arms.
With a mental slap, she began to try to work out a decent solution to the situation.
All right, I'm now being taken to Mirrkwud's 'palace' by Sued!Legolas. That place is going to be crawling with Mary-Sues…
At that moment, a most opportune flash of ingenuity came to Morgan.
Legolas must have a map… and a map shows places that I need to go to… thusly… I can find places that I need to go…
Then, there came the problem.
How do I get said map? …How do I avoid getting brutally murdered by Mary-Sues in the process…? …How do the Sues avoid being brutally murdered by each other? Hmmm… must think. Need time.
There was, unfortunately, a distinct lack of time. After a few minutes of thinking very hard, Legolas announced that they were there.
Shizzit!
And thus she was taken into the area with the highest Sue concentration this side of Rivendell.
Somehow, despite it all, Morgan found herself sitting on a soft, downy bed in the middle of a rather…pink, frilly room, and, though the reason alluded her, a Mary-Sue was brushing her hair. She was prattling along about Gods-knew-what.
"…and, so I said, 'Like, whatever,' and…"
"Er… hi?"
"Oh, like, hi! My name is Aralaratharienaiahtlaha, but you can call me Ara," she said with a perkiness that should have been illegal.* "I'm Legolas's true wuv!"
"…er…right… I'm Morgan… nice to meet you?"
Then, someone else entered the room. Her hair was like burnished gold, and there were other cheesy synonyms to describe her that will not be mentioned here.
"Oh, hello! Who might you be?" she asked in a melodic voice.
"Erm… Morgan…"
"That's lovely. My name is Lìalin Undomiel, and I am Legolas's wife and true love."
"…wait… I thought she was…" Morgan randomly pointed at Ara.
"We both are, silly!" Ara giggled.
Morgan blinked, suddenly confused.
"Oh, don't worry, dear," Lìalin said in an infuriatingly motherly voice. "All those warrior-women and the such killed each other off. Only we kind, gentle maidens remain."
"Oh…good…"
Well, that explains a few things…
Then, once more, another Mary-Sue entered.
"Legolas would like to speak to Morgan," she said pleasantly. Morgan stood quickly and followed this Sue out of the room. The frills were beginning to bother her…
"My name is Särliwen," she smiled shyly. "I'm-…"
"…Legolas's wife and only true love, yes, I know," Morgan interjected.
"Oh…yes…" she seemed slightly dejected, but soon recovered. "Here we are."
They stopped before two huge, imposing doors.
"This is Legolas's study," Särliwen said. She opened the great mahogany doors, and ushered Morgan in.
"Hey," he said with a shrewd smile.
Shizzit.
'Boom' went the doors as they slammed shut.
*Perkiness of that sort was, indeed, deemed illegal in numerous different areas of the known world.
[A/N- Wow, that took me ages to get up… sorry about that.]