Hermione turned of her alarm clock. It was six in the morning and she hadn't got more than two hous sleep. She couldn't take Ron out from her mind. He had looked more distant than ever at Christmas. It was all her fault. In fact if it wasn't for Harry stubborness she doubted Ron had talked to her again at all. Oh, Harry…another Christmas without news from him. Where would he be?.
And Ron had looked so good. Well, he looked tired and a little sad, too thin for hers and Molly's tastes, but sooo damm handsome. Thouse blue eyes, so blue; thouse flaming red locks, so fiery; that muscled back, so broad; that flat abdomen and that perfect sexy bum! "Stop, girl! Enough!". But the countless freckles, his pink lips…"Down girl!". Oh, and his deep voice…his warm soapy smell…mmm "Enough!".
Hermione new it had been all her fault. She had have him, and could had had him still if she had not been such a coward. He had been the sweetest boyfriend a girl could wish. And even more because he had manage that without stoping being one of her best friends. As always he had been able to cheer them in the middle of a war, and even mind for her well being after the news about Percy's murder had reach Hogwarts. Ron had been so shaken and lost then… and she had payed him by leaving him without an explanation.
She steeped into the shower and tried to wash away the tingle in her skin. She still could remember his burning hands touching all of her as if he were there, his deep sweet kisses and his warm breath in her neck while he pumped wildly into her when they made love. The feeling of him inside her that first time… He had manage not to cause her any pain and even get her to completion. He had been also a virgin but that had not matter. The few times they were together like that had been heaven. She had had another lovers since then, always trying to forget Ron, but none had managed to give her what Ron, with his inexperienced sixteen-year-old hands, did. Better be a cold shower.
Cold and frustrated Hermione dryed herself and proceeded to make some coffee and toast for breakfast. Why had she left him? Just because she was afraid. She had never told anyone, but the Christmas of the sixth year had been a nightmare. She had gone home and her parents had spent all her hollydays rowing. Then, right at New Years day they had told her they were getting a divorce. With that and the war Hermione had been devastated. Then Percy died and Ron was so sad, and Harry felt so guilty, if her parents had not been able to help each other in a normal relationship how could she help Ron? She was too young to have such a serious relationship, and no one loved forever…so she had told nothing about her parents to Ron till the next course when the divorce had been official, and nothing about her fears and just had dumped him in a panic attack. She had not told her reasons to anyone, not even the pestering Harry. Who had pursued her without rest and had not stopped till…he had not stopped. In fact, she thought, Ron and her had started to talk again just to keep Harry quiet.
But the real reason she had not tell anyone was because she knew she was wrong. People did love forever. The Weasleys parents were a living proof. And her grandparents. An her; she was still in love with Ron, and had she trust him they would have work everything out together.
She had hurt him so much that she didn't think it possible to fix it. But Harry had teached them that the impossible was possible. Perhaps she could talk to Ron about it, ask for a second oportunity. You'd never know, he may give her one. They were grown ups, if she told him about her stupidity he may forgive her, they could start again…
Feeling more cheerful Hermione left her little apartment and apparated at her