"Now what?" Hinton asked the gaggle of people surrounding him, looking down at him with wonder.
"You wonderful boy!" exclaimed Elaina, picking him up and spinning him around. Mrs. Jones took him from her stepdaughter's arms and wrapped the little boy in her own.
"You are such a brave, courageous, intelligent little dear!" his mother sobbed, pulling his head to her bosom and ruffling his already disheveled hair.
"Mo-om," complained Hinton, pushing away, a crimson blush revealing his embarrassment. "We still have to deal with the… the… what's the word Elaina? The one you used the other day to describe that Wiggy man? Cad!" delighted Hinton, as the word popped into his little head. "That was it! We still have to deal with these cads."
"Hinton… were you eavesdropping on us?" asked Rene, kneeling down to look him squarely in his twinkling eyes. He ignored her and walked up to one of the villains who were currently tied tightly with bed sheets and glaring at the strangely cheerful assembly. Hinton peered intently into Wickham's scowl, the glanced curiously at the distraught Mr. Collins.
"Rene… I do not see that either of these men's smiles could knock you on your rump. They seems rather ugly to me." Elaina snickered and Rene blushed slightly; nothing ever made Rene blush. Mrs. Jones eyed her youngest stepdaughter cautiously and reminded herself to watch the girl more closely.
"What should we do with him, Elizabeth," spoke Rene, attempting to change the subject.
But Elizabeth did not answer. Looking up from the two captives that they had managed to truss up like knotted confused brides in pure white sheets, and about the room, Mrs. Jones and her stepdaughters realized that the window was open.
"Where's Jonathan?" asked Elaina, realizing that he no longer stood near her.
"Elizabeth?" questioned Mrs. Jones, warily approaching the now open window. All three women pushed little Hinton aside, his heroics quite forgotten for the moment, and stuck their heads out the window.
Elizabeth perched precariously on the thin ledge under her window, and Mr. Richards stood on the other. She silenced the three heads, two dark, one blonde, with a single finger to her lips. The questions they had died on their lips as fear entered their hearts and froze their movements. The three knew she went for her husband, who was assuredly held captive in the next room.
Elizabeth herself had thought her plan through. When her door had been shot open and Wickham and Collins had appeared, all logical thought had flown from her head, and a surprised, alarmed scream came unbidden from her throat. In desperation born of shock and bewilderment, she had picked up her heavy brushes and hand mirrors and thrown them at the intruder's heads. Collins quickly suffered a blow to the right shoulder and small wooden box glanced the left side of Wickham's ear. Darcy's muffled scream of "Elizabeth!" had awakened her to her senses and made her realize just whom she was dealing with. Mr. Collins of all people, possibly the stupidest man alive, and Mr. Wickham, who at the moment was thoroughly foxed.
She had realized that though they brandished a single firearm, it would not be loaded. They had used their only shot to force entry into her room. Poor Mr. Collins would never be able to reload the gun, and Elizabeth doubted that even a military man such as Wickham would be able to under the circumstances. He looked about ready to collapse on the spot, and only the amiable arm thrown round Collins' shoulders held him upright.
Elizabeth almost laughed at the sight of the two men, but knew not what frame of mind the drunken Wickham was in. Was he a violent drunk? She cared not to find out.
It was then, as she was assessing the situation and attempting to formulate a plan that Hinton had burst into the room, Mr. Richards right behind him, closely followed by Mrs. Jones, and Rene. Hinton threw himself at the intruder's legs, heedless of his broken arm, and catching them completely unawares, was able to pull them to the floor. Rene and Mrs. Jones, who both wore white robes over their night rails, pulled the covering clothing from their bodies and tied villains' hands behind their backs. Mr. Richards waved a shiny pistol at their heads as he pulled the unused sheets from Elizabeth's bed and tied the two men together. At one point, Hinton sat on their backs as they lay prone on the bedroom floor, his backside sitting bonily on Collins' pudgy back and her legs extended over Wickham's sides. He kicked merrily.
And thus, mused Elizabeth, were the unwanted intruders captured. Elaina had entered the room silently some time after this, and shortly afterwards, Elizabeth, who remained silent throughout, trained her attention on the bedroom window. When she had pulled open the shutter and lifted one leg up to the sill, she found Mr. Richards beside her, helping her out.
"I believe the window is the best way to Mr. Darcy," he said softly as he followed her onto the ledge outside. "I was in his room today. As I'm sure you know, rather voluminous and heavy velvet curtains cover his windows. If you enter through you door, or through the one that the other intruders broke through, you will be caught immediately. However, if you climb carefully through the window…" he left the rest of his statement unfinished for he knew that his words had been her thoughts for some time now. "Let me open the window for you," he said, inching closer to the matching window that led to Darcy's room. "It will not be as easy to open from the outside. They, of course, are not made to do so."
Elizabeth nodded her consent and watched as he placed his palms warily on the glass pane. As he started pushing upward, Mrs. Jones and her stepdaughters poked their heads into the night air, curiosity evident in their eyes. They understood her silent plea for silence and watched as Mr. Richards successfully opened the window and inched further down the ledge to allow Elizabeth room to enter her husband's chambers.
Carefully, praying that her movements did not much disturb the stillness of the curtains, Elizabeth lowered herself to the soft carpet inside the room.
"I'm glad to see you came around so easily nephew," she heard from behind the covering curtains. That voice was unmistakable; it could belong to non other than the imperious Lady Catherine De Bourg.
"Now the marriage Father, and quickly," spoke another voice, younger. This one sent shivers of heated rage up and down Elizabeth's spine. Caroline Bingley. Elizabeth risked a peek from behind the curtain. Squeezing her fists into her palms, she managed to keep from jumping from her hiding spot and strangling the gangly, presumptuous…
"Lady Catherine," spoke a voice Elizabeth did not recognize, a male voice. She looked to the man who spoke. He was older, his face long and worn, his robes dingy in the dim light of fire that roared in Darcy's hearth.
"Yes," said the Lady sharply, as if his mere breathing wasted her time and money.
"I cannot marry your nephew to Miss. Bingley."
"Why of course you can! Is that not why I brought you here? You specialize in forced marriages! Darcy's marriage is now annulled, by his own forced hand no less! There are surely no impediments now. And if there are, then it is nothing that cannot be repaired instantaneously."
"No, no," spoke the male voice, "It is not that I won't marry the two, it is just that I cannot! At least, I do not think I can."
"Explain yourself Father Laine," roared Lady Catherine quietly, "and quickly too. I've no patience for your riddles." Caroline agreed with an agitated growl.
"Unless your nephew was christened Dread Pirate Darcy, my Lady, I'm afraid his marriage is not annulled."
Lady Catherine snatched the papers that she had given to the Father without a single glance from his shaking hand. She pulled the papers close to her nose and squinted her eyes at the bottom line that sported Darcy's signature. Caroline peeked over the older lady's shoulder then raised her gaze, shocked, to Darcy, who was wearing quite a cocky grin.
Darcy grinned victoriously at the three conspirators before him. "I will never annul my marriage to my wife. The devil himself couldn't make me. What makes you think you can Lady Catherine?"
The fact that he had not addressed her as Aunt irked her already tempered ire.
She raised her gun level with her smirking nephew's nose.
"You have not reloaded that pistol aunt, and by the time you do, I could have it from you." He knew he spoke the truth, and it buoyed his courage.
Lady Catherine sighed and dropped her chin to her chest, and then pulled a second gun from a hidden pocket in her skirt. "I never come unprepared nephew. Surely you would realize that. This pistol she cocked and raised to his heart, dropping the other useless weapon to the floor. "Now," she said coolly, "You will sign these papers correctly, or you will cease to exist dear nephew."
"Nooo!" yelled Elizabeth as she rushed from behind the curtains. Darcy stood shocked, eyes wide, mouth gaping.
"Elizabeth?" he exclaimed in return. "Elizabeth stop!" he yelled, "Do not come any closer." His voice was now icy with fear and the purpose it created. She stopped but two feet from his back. She could reach out and touch him if it were within the capabilities of her muscles to do it, but the fact that Lady Catherine's loaded gun was now pointed wholly at her own bosom froze her to the spot.
"I do not know how you escaped, you country harlot," growled Lady Catherine. "But I do know that if you are not careful you will not leave this room tonight. However," she said her voice changing tone, becoming lighter, "If you are lucky, you will simply switch husbands. I'm sure you will be delighted to serve as wife to either Mr. Collins or Mr. Wickham. Although I'm not sure if Collins will have you, and Mr. Wickham might reconsider his heated regard after tonight's affairs.
"Darcy, sign the papers, or I shoot you." She once again trained the gun on her nephew.
"I will not!" His fists balled at his sides and his posture froze. His eyes gleamed fire and his words carried warnings.
"Miss. Bennet." Lady Catherine turned her attention back to Elizabeth. "Do you wish to see your husband die simply because he does not wish to be unfaithful to you?" Lady Catherine could see the thoughts behind Elizabeth's eyes and gloated over her own brilliance. If she could but get the country tramp to convince Darcy to annul their marriage, victory would be even sweeter. Betrayal by his own wife; Darcy would be crushed. And that was just the sort of nephew she needed and husband Caroline desired.
Elizabeth studied the back of her husband's head, her eyes pooling with tears. She pushed the tears back and reminded herself that she could not give up so easily. Not to the likes of Lady Catherine and Caroline. Surely there was a way out of this. Perhaps a sign to her friends in the next room? No, if she made any move at all, Lady Catherine might fire the blasted weapon. But she could not let Darcy, her Dread Pirate! marry Caroline Bingley of all people. That above all could not happen. But… perhaps… "I will not have you give your life for me William," she spoke softly, slowly lifting a hand to the back of his shoulder." Darcy turned to look at his wife, his eyes darting across her face, confused. "Sign the papers Darcy," she said calmly, attempting to relate her thoughts to him with her eyes and tone of voice.
Darcy's brow furrowed together, and it was clear he did not understand. His eyes searched her face quicker now, darting here and there across its planes. He struggled with the meaning of her words. Did she have a plan? Or was she just being self-sacrificing? And to think nothing of the sacrifice she was making of him to the matrimonial alter with Caroline Bingley! He frowned as he recognized, finally, the tone in which she had ordered him to sign the annulment papers. She used it when she was irritated, just as she did his last name. Darcy.
He decided to trust his wife. Grabbing the papers from his aunt's hand, he took them once again to the desk where he grudgingly signed his own name, the one given to him at birth.
"Very good!" exclaimed lady Catherine as she carefully inspected the papers before her. She handed them to Father Laine, and smiled when he shook his head in approval.
"Now I can marry the partially unhappy couple," he said with a smile. Such quips were ways in which he lightened up the oftentimes-tense atmosphere that presided over his weddings. They never seemed to amuse anyone but him though.
"Oh Darcy," Caroline oozed, flinging her arms around the thoroughly horrified man's shoulders, "I shall be so happy as mistress of Pemberly! You will soon find that marrying her was a mistake. You will thank me one day!"
Darcy stared on, thoroughly disgusted and attempted to extricate himself from Caroline's arms. He certainly hoped his wi… no, not any longer. His own hand had destroyed that. He prayed Elizabeth knew exactly what she was doing.
Elizabeth didn't know exactly what she was doing. She had hoped that once Darcy had signed the papers, Lady Catherine would drop her guard, and hopefully the gun, on the assumption that she had one, that victory was hers. However, the gun still waved unceremoniously in the air in the general direction of either her or her husband.
Her mind did not trip over the word husband as his had wife. She had ever intention of remaining his wife whether he had signed his name to some silly piece of paper or not. An annulment could be taken care of. They would simply marry again! She frowned as she realized that some action was needed immediately. The blasted priest was already getting into place between the sole couple of the wedding party. She was too far away from the scene, and most particularly from Lady Catherine. She watched as the priest asked Caroline if she took Darcy to be her husband.
Elizabeth promptly rolled her eyes into her head and fainted dead away, falling into a heap near the foot of Darcy's bed.
"Stay where you are!" Lady Catherine ordered the three in the wedding tableau. "Continue!" She walked wearily up to where Elizabeth lay unconscious on the floor and quite indecorously squatted beside the fallen figure. One hand moved to Elizabeth's forehead as the one holding the gun rested against the floor, pinning the pistol to the carpet.
"AHHHH!" Yelled Lady Catherine as the seemingly unmoving body threw itself towards her, toppling her to the floor. The gun was lost from her finger tips and she flailed at her attacker.
"Richards! Rachel!" screamed Elizabeth as she tried her best to pin the screeching and thrashing Lady Catherine to the floor. "Elaina! Rene!"
The four barged into the room from her door just as Darcy stood from where he had retrieved Lady Catherine's gun off the floor. Elizabeth rolled off the older lady, not caring too much if she had hurt her, as Darcy placed the gun in the band of his britches and motioned for Mr. Richards to do the same.
Lady Catherine did not move from her prone position on the floor.
"I've killed her!" exclaimed Elizabeth. Darcy knelt down and felt at his aunts neck, right below her jaw line.
"No Elizabeth, she is not dead, merely fainted," he assured her. Elizabeth's shoulders relaxed and she covered her face with her hands. Darcy rushed over to lift her from her sitting position and pull her into the strong circle of his arms. She willingly melted into them, letting him support her weight. Darcy turned to where Mr. Richards had his gun out once more from the band of his pants and trained now on the stricken preacher. Elaina and Rene had Caroline captive, one on each side, holding her still though she struggled to escape their grasp. He almost chuckled at the scene, but did not have the time as the room was quickly overcome by even more people. Mr. and Mrs. Bennet came hurtling into the room followed quickly by their four other daughters and Mr. Bingley. Mr. Bennet supported his wife who was frantically waving at her face, her eyes half closed, and was muttering unintelligible declarations of excitation. Mr. Bingley demanded to know exactly what was transpiring at this hour.
"This is the second time tonight that this household has been disturbed! What type of establishment do you run here Darcy?" he demanded to know. Darcy noted how close and protectively he stood next to Elizabeth's older sister Jane.
"Yes indeed," spoke Mr. Bennet. "Earlier we led to believe that all the ruckus was to be attributed to a small boy's sleep walking. However, I have begun to believe that that assertion," he eyed Elaina warily, "was a lie." Elaina blushed but held her chin high in defiance of her reasons for falsehood.
"When you all appeared outside of Elizabeth's door earlier, I knew that as many people as we numbered could be dangerous in an emergency situation. I also did not wish to harm either you or your daughters."
"If you were awakened by the same crashes and screams that we were, then how did you know the situation young lady," said Mr. Bennet appraisingly.
"I was not wakened by them sir," replied Elaina. "My brother pulled me from my bed and made me aware of the fact that intruders had entered the house. He then went to wake our mother and Mr. Richards, who we knew would be able to successfully wield a firearm. Again sir, I remind you that we did not wish to endanger your family anymore than it was already endangered in the form of your daughter Elizabeth."
"This, I think, is neither the time nor the place for such discussions," asserted Darcy loudly, attempting to drown out the competing voices of Mr. Bennet and Miss. Jones. "We must first do something with our captives. Lady Catherine must be dealt with firstly I believe, and the others must be locked in the guest rooms on the third floor for now. Richards, Bingley, Mr. Bennet, we will need to gather the men first I think. The good father can be sent home, swiftly, and on foot, but the other two villains should be taken to separate chambers and locked in. Richards, Bingley, would you please attend to Mr. Collins and Mr. Wickham? Mr. Bennet, it seems as if the Miss. Joneses have Miss. Bingley under control, but would you please escort the three to an appropriate room on the third floor? A maid, I'm sure is hovering right out the door. I'm sure the whole household is, with all the noise that we've had tonight. She will take you to Mrs. Reynolds who will have the keys to all the rooms. Oh… and do not let those sisters hurt Miss. Bingley. I feel quite certain they're fully capable of it."
Elaina and Rene smiled broadly and mischievously as they pulled Caroline, protesting still, through Darcy's bedroom door and into the hallway. As Mr. Darcy had guessed, it contained possibly every servant that resided at Pemberly, from the lowest stable boy to the ruling Mrs. Reynolds, who merely ushered them upstairs and pressed a tiny gold key into Mr. Bennet's palm.