Dear Toby,

I wanted to take the time to tell you how sorry I am that I wasn't a great friend to you as you are to me. I feel like I've always seem to have taken you for granted... something you didn't deserve. You are one of the sweetest, most loyal guys I will ever know and one of the funniest too. Most people don't listen to you, but I do. You have such an intelligent brain with such witty comments. I'll miss those comments.

You were always there for me. When Sean broke up with me, when Mr. Simpson had cancer, when I needed someone for that Panther skit. Only Toby Issacs would have the courage to do that. Even Sean wouldn't do it.

It's not fair for me to leave you with such cruel people at Degrassi. It's not fair that J.T., Manny, and even me deserted you when you needed us the most. We all haven't been good friends to you. And I don't know about the two of them, but I feel so guilty about that. I never, ever, meant to hurt your feelings intentionally.

When we hugged at Jimmy's memorial service, I felt close to you again. I felt like, maybe, just maybe I could start making up for all the missed times I could have been a best friend to you. And now I have to go. You'll probably hate me forever. And I don't blame you. Because I've become numb to feelings.

I remember when you had that massive crush on me. I was so amused by it, but I remember feeling bad when you yelled at me for ditching you for Sean. I'm sorry, Toby. I didn't mean to hurt you.

Bye, Toby. I'll really miss you. You were one of the few people who cared.

Love,
Emma

Emma started to shake and put the letter in the pile. She sat on her bed and shook with her tears, feeling incredibly guilty for what she was about to do.

' Why do I care? Why do I care if I make them hurt? What makes me think they will hurt? Nobody cares... right?"

As she lay in her bed that night, she wasn't sure what she thought anymore. She thought these letters would help her, but they were just making it worse.

FLASHBACK

She saw Manny and Toby walking up ahead and raced up ahead to catch up to them.

" Wow, Toby, you were incredible! I mean it," she said sincerely, grateful for his help, even if she DID have a big bruise on her forehead. He was about to say something but she saw Sean up ahead and her eyes lit up.

" I'll be right back," she said hastily and hurried up to talk to Sean. She didn't notice his hurt and disappointed look.

END OF FLASHBACK

Her cellphone rang but she was too much in a deep sleep to hear it.

NEXT UP: CRAIG