Title: His Reality
Author: JacksTortugaLass
Characters: Mark and Roger
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: The lyrics from "Goodbye Love" and the characters of Mark and Roger are all property of Jonathan Larson.
I based this ficlet on the following lyrics:
ROGER: But who, Mark, are you/ "Mark has got his work" / They say, "Mark lives for his work" / And, "Mark's in love with his work" / Mark hides in his work
MARK: From what?
ROGER: Facing your failure, facing your loneliness / Facing the fact you live a lie / Yes, you live a lie – tell you why / You're always preaching not to be numb / When that's how you thrive / You pretend to create and observe / When you really detach form feeling alive
And now, the ficlet:
He wasn't one to face reality, especially his. If he could help it, he looked at it through the camera lens. From there, he wouldn't have to really live it; the camera would take most of the brutal pain, and leave an image for him later on. He knew Roger was right when he told him that he just pretended. It was safer this way. He never felt what was projected onto the wall; he just put it together.
But that was before. Before when he could hide from the past years. When he could hide from all o fit. Now, Roger had died. He couldn't hide from that at all. And that kind of pain he couldn't escape behind a camera lens.
For the first time, Mark wouldn't let himself hide. He opened up and let the pain in.