You know, those of you who are actually leaving reviews are treading dangerous ground to be connected with such a bad story as this one. But thank you anyway!

We're getting close to the end of Daniel's ordeal. He still has some troubles to go through, though, so read on if you so desire.

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An early return to the SGC ensued, with Daniel growing more and more sure that his life would be greatly enhanced if he could turn invisible and disappear for about a year. Of course Dr. Fraiser knew the entire story and insisted on an exam that went far beyond the normal post-mission check-up. Every conceivable test was hauled out and administered, along with an inordinate amount of blood being drawn and electrodes attached. But the worst was yet to come.

"Daniel," Dr. Fraiser began, perusing a chart as she spoke, "we have one more test to run."

"Wonderful," Daniel grumbled. "How much more blood do you need?"

Janet hesitated as she looked up from the chart. "We…need to monitor you the next time you experience the juja."

Daniel's hands clenched. "Monitor?" he parroted.

"Yes." Janet once again looked at the chart. "We're going to hook you up to different monitors so that we can see exactly what's happening during an episode."

"But…you know what happens!" Daniel protested.

"Not exactly. I need to see how your brain is reacting, and I want to check your testosterone levels. Things are going on during the episodes that I need to measure."

"But…but you can't…I mean…"

Janet smiled sympathetically. "Daniel, I'm sorry about all this. I really am. But if you ever want to have a…normal…experience, we need to get to the bottom of this."

Daniel groaned, his face covered by his hand. "Monitor away," he said.

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Out of deference for Daniel's privacy, Janet had situated him in an isolation room. He sat morosely, attached to numerous monitors. He also had a call button that he was to push as soon as he felt an episode coming on.

He looked up expectantly as the door opened, ready to protest that he had not pushed the call button yet and don't be so eager to watch, when Jack walked in.

Sauntered in would be more accurate, and Daniel sighed. "You're not supposed to be in here," he said wearily. "Only Dr. Fraiser and about a dozen nurses."

"I paid one off," Jack deadpanned.

"Ha, ha."

Jack made himself comfortable on the stool. "Cheer up, Daniel. It could be worse."

Daniel's eyebrows rose. "Worse? How?"

"Uh, well, I don't know right off the top of my head, but I'm sure that worse things have happened."

Daniel folded his arms. "I am so not in the mood for this."

"What, my rapier-like wit or your about-to-be-very-public-exhibition?"

"I just want to get this over with."

Jack half rose. "Want some magazines? Archeology Today? Nerd World? Playboy?"

Daniel mumbled some very improper obscenities, causing Jack to recoil in mock horror.

"Daniel, my innocent ears!"

"You're enjoying this way too much!"

"I am not…enjoying it. Enjoyment would imply something that I don't want to be…implied."

"You are too enjoying it! Admit it!"

"Am not!"

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Pervert."

"Daniel, I am not—"

"Yes you are."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am…" Jack paused, then sighed in defeat. "Not."

Daniel rubbed his eyes. "You know, what I just don't get about all this is why it was me that those girls gave the juja to in the first place."

"Don't they use it for making out?"

"Yeah, that's what Sam said."

"So…" Jack gestured. "What don't you get?"

Daniel looked up at him. "What do you mean, what don't I get?"

"What don't you get about them giving you the juja?"

"Because…" Daniel faltered. "Because…they…"

Jack grinned. "They were hoping for a doozy of a make-out session, you dog!"

"No!"

"Oh, yeah!"

"Jack, that can't—"

"Yep, and you wasted it. The perfect opportunity, and you blew it."

"Jack, they were—"

"You just don't realize the effect you have on women."

"They were just girls!"

"And how many? Six? Seven?"

"Jack—"

"So what kind of signals were you sending, Danny Boy? Must've been pretty hot to get the whole bunch after you."

"Jack, I'm gonna ki—" Daniel suddenly squeezed his eyes shut. "Oh, boy."

Jack raised his eyebrows. "What? Show's on?"

"Jaaaack!"

"Fine! Fine, I'm leaving. Don't forget to alert the forces."

Daniel glared at him as he reached for the call button. "Get out."

"Oh, don't worry. I've already seen all I want of this showing." As he spoke, O'Neill backed toward the door. "Yessiree, I so do not want a second viewing. No curtain calls, no encores, no—"

"Jack!"

"Leaving!"