Chapter 11
As the dark phoenix, Harry made it to Hogwarts in about fifteen minutes. Landing just in front of the entrance he resumed his human form and entered the castle he had been away from for so long. Part of him was conflicted about returning to this place. This castle had been a great source of pain for Harry over the years, as well as a place of great happiness. There were many things at this castle that Harry wasn't quite ready to confront. But in the end all that truly mattered was being someplace safe and secure. And there simply was no better place than Hogwarts. Also, with his return from the dead his friends would once again be top targets, here was where he could best protect them.
Harry knew before he even checked his watch that everyone was in the great hall for dinner. Deciding that it would not do to waste time, Harry made his way directly to the great hall.
It was time that Harry took his place in the wizard world, as it was meant to be since before he had been born. But, if they thought that he was going to play this game by their rules, they were sorely mistaken.
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Cho had not been having a good day. She hadn't read all of the material for NEWT transfiguration and as such had not been prepared for McGonagall's pop quiz. She knew that the next time she went to that class, a dismal test paper was waiting to be handed back to her.
Quidditch practice had been an absolute disaster. Her trusty cleansweep (A/N: is that the broom she has?) had been deteriorating all of last year and now it seemed as though its time had come. To make matters worse, she had been named the captain of the team and had to find replacements for the old captain and chaser Roger Davies, and one of the beaters. The replacements she had managed to find had only had a few practices, but their performances thus far were enough to make her cringe. They had a fair shot at beating Hufflepuff, but Syltherin, and especially Gryffindor, were both poised to beat them into the pitch.
Reflecting briefly on the Gryffindor quidditch team she couldn't help but admire them. Almost everyone in Gryffindor and many people from other houses had taken to wearing a black armband in memory of their fallen hero. Ron Weasley was made the Gryffindor quidditch captain over Katie Bell, apparently she had been offered it, but had deferred it to Ron, because she only had a year left and she needed all the time she could get to study for NEWT's. An issue Cho could really relate to at the moment.
Cho had sat in on a few Gryffindor practices (with Ron's permission, of course) and was amazed by how much zeal the team took with them to the pitch. It was almost as though losing Harry had spurred all of them on to win the quidditch cup in his name.
On the whole, Cho couldn't complain too much. Her marks were all still very high and she had many good friends, especially Ron and Hermione. Her new boyfriend, Stan, was also a very bright point in her life now. She immensely enjoyed spending time with him, and going to the Hogsmeade trips with him. Even though she didn't always need him around, he was always there to make sure nothing was ever wrong. He was a really good, sweet, guy; and he made her very happy.
But deep down, Cho knew that despite how perfect their relationship might seem, there was just something missing. Whenever they kissed, it felt great and all, but it lacked that amazing explosion of feeling that Harry had been able to give her. And regardless of how often Cho reminded herself that it was completely wrong of her to continually compare Stan to Harry, she just couldn't help it. That brief moment when she and Harry were together was just so fantastic and amazing, nothing else could seem to make her feel that way.
Cho learned the hard way that regardless of wonderful something was, when it's gone it doesn't do to dwell on what you've lost. You just have to pull yourself together and move on, even if you know your heart will never love as passionately as it once did.
Cho was reminding herself of this as she ate dinner that night with her housemates. She found herself silently laughing as Ron was making jokes so loud at the Gryffindor table that the entire hall could hear them. But it wasn't the jokes that were funny, no, it was Hermione's attempt to stifle her own laughter and remind Ron that Professor Snape was also in the room and could hear everything he was saying about his class.
Just as Cho saw Professor Snape stand up to presumably take points from Gryffindor, the doors to the great hall burst open with such force that they slammed into the walls behind them creating a resounding BANG that echoed throughout the entire room.
Standing in the doorway was a boy of average height with a seemingly superior build to him. But as she saw his face her heart skipped a beat.
There could be no mistaking that mop of unruly hair and those dazzling, brilliant green eyes. But it couldn't be him. He died. She saw it. But there he was, standing there as though his very existence is an act of defiance.
Harry Potter had returned.
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Harry didn't know when he had developed this sick sense of humor, but when the idea of magically throwing the doors to the great hall open so hard that everyone would nearly piss themselves was just too good an opportunity to pass up. That and he really wanted to see the looks on everyone's faces. Harry also figured that if everyone were shocked enough, they wouldn't see how terrified he was.
Harry was so scared of how his friends would react he was nearly trembling, would they be glad to see him? Relieved? Upset? Angry now that he had come back and was putting them in danger once more? Harry tried with all his might to push those thoughts from his mind as he stood in the doorway of the great hall, hundreds of people frozen in their shock. An eternity seemed to pass as Harry knew that at this moment, every person in this room had just experienced something that they will remember for the rest of their lives. Harry Potter returning from the dead.
Harry looked from face to face at everyone who was frozen mid-meal, some with their mouths hanging open, others stopped in mid-chew. Looking at the faces of the professors he saw that Snape was standing in one of his threatening poses that now looked completely ridiculous as his face was one of complete shock, as his eyes darted to Harry, and then to the headmaster, and then back to Harry. McGonagall looked as though she didn't know whether she should scream for joy or in terror. Hagrid, Harry had to suppress the urge to laugh, looked completely confused, as though he was trying to work out how Harry was supposed to be dead and yet was standing there in front of them all. As Harry looked at the Headmaster, he knew that this was one of those very rare moments when Albus Dumbledore was caught completely by surprise.
Harry spoke in a quiet voice that seemed every bit as loud as the doors had just been a few moments ago, "Might I have a few words with you, Headmaster?" And with nothing more to say he turned around and began to walk towards the Headmaster's office. He could hear people in the Great Hall begin to start talking again as the shock wore off and then the sounds of rapid footsteps towards the exit. Harry knew that he was about to overrun by a pack of people who wanted to make sure that he was really there.
Just as Harry was about to start panicking, he heard Dumbledore's voice telling the students to remain in the Great Hall until he returns, under the supervision of all the professors. He could hear Ron's voice (at least he thought it was Ron's voice, it sounded a bit deeper than when he heard it last) demanding to be allowed to see Harry.
But he didn't get to hear Dumbledore's response as he passed out of earshot, even for his excellent hearing. He arrived that the entrance to the headmaster's office a few moments later and using the same technique he had used earlier, waved his hand in front of the gargoyle and opened the door. Harry climbed the stairs and took a seat in one of the chairs as he waited for Dumbledore.
He only had to wait for a few moments, and Dumbledore came through the door and sat down at his desk. Harry watched as Dumbledore reached for something under his desk and pulled a bag of lemon drops out and said, "Can I offer you some lemon drops, Harry?"
Harry feeling rather hungry said, "Yeah, sure," reaching over the desk and taking the entire bag from the headmaster. He popped a few into his mouth and waited for Dumbledore to start asking the inevitable questions.
"So, Harry, what have you been doing with yourself this past month or so?" Dumbledore asked without preamble.
Harry knew that there was nothing to gain by lying to Dumbledore, but at the same time, he knew that he shouldn't tell anyone about the girls he had been with. That was something that he would entrust to no other person. "Well, I've been . . . away. Mostly training, and reading, and practicing magic. I'm confident the next time I'm in a duel with the dark lord, I won't be nearly so easy prey."
"Why did you decide to come back now?"
Harry rolled his eyes, "Surely you've heard of the attack on St. Mungo's earlier today?"
"Of course, the aurors at the scene said that Harry Potter had returned from the dead to help them fight off the death eaters. I knew immediately that it had been you, but when you didn't immediately come here or to Grimmauld Place, I figured you weren't going to come out of hiding just yet."
"I would have come back sooner . . . there were just . . . things that needed to done," Harry said not meeting the headmaster's gaze.
"I can't tell you how glad I am to see that you've returned to us, Harry," the aged wizard said. Harry knew immediately that this was said with every bit of genuine quality that could be spoken. "I have been researching what you told me over the summer about these new powers of yours and what they felt like. I must say that I read through quite a few musty old tomes before I found the answer. Harry, I believe that, if everything you told me about your powers is accurate, you are a battle mage," Dumbledore said, his eyes twinkling like mad.
"A battle mage? What the hell is that?" Harry said completely surprised that there was actually a name for what he was.
"Battle mages have always been rare, but not rare that we've forgotten them completely. In the days before magic was formalized into a precise practice, back in the time of the wild magic, magic users were very different. They didn't even call themselves wizards and witches. Magic was performed in very crude and inefficient ways because wands hadn't yet been invented, so many simply used wandless magic, or a staff. Actually any witch or wizard is able to perform wandless magic, but it simply takes much, much longer to perform with immensely more complicated incantations, and often times chanting and even dancing. Some spells took days to perform back in those days.
"In those days, magical people made war on each other not over purity of blood or light and dark magic, but more for things like territory, and better magical focus points."
"Focus points?" Harry asked.
"Focus points are places in nature where magic is stronger for some reason. No one has ever determined why this is, but focus points do exist. Hogwarts is actually situated on one. Many students are surprised when they first leave these grounds how much more difficult spell casting can be away from the school. Another prominent one is at Stonehenge. In ancient days, magical folk would seek out these places and set up villages around them to make spell casting easier."
"Oh I get it," Harry said understanding.
"So magical people were constantly fighting amongst each other for the various focus points. Battle mages were wizards, or witches that had a natural sense for fighting and could manipulate the magic of the world with nothing more than the force of their mind. They could see every aspect of a battle and natural instinct always helped them to win. Battle mages were born to fight, and had amazing prowess in battles, but as a tradeoff, the better the battle mage, the more difficulty they would have in other, non-combative forms of magic. The best battle mages always had trouble with things like gardening spells and cleaning spells. Anything that couldn't possibly be used in battle was always difficult for them to grasp. The only exception to that was healing. Battle mages could heal the most grievous of injuries and bring people back from the verge of death."
"So that's why I always had trouble transfiguring mice into matchboxes, and charming a book to read itself? Because it's something that can't be used battle? Well that certainly makes me feel better, I thought I was just magically retarded or something," Harry said.
Dumbledore chuckled for a moment before continuing, "So for many years battle mages would exist to protect their villages and loved ones from outside attacks. But as magic became more and more formalized, better techniques, the advent of wands, and the founding of Hogwarts; the need for battle mages soon dwindled. They would pop up every now and then and be celebrated for their prowess at dueling and the feats they could perform without wands, but as wizards learned better how to defend themselves, the need for protectors slowly ebbed away. Until finally battle mages became exceedingly rare, only one every century or two. The last known battle mage died in the early 1700's. It's theorized that battle mages are still among us, but their instinct is all but crushed with everything they learn in school about magical theory and spell casting with a wand. Generally they would be very good duelers and rather mediocre at nearly everything else, but unable to perform wandless magic because the talent was simply not ever recognized and trained."
"Wow, there's an actual name for what I am then? It's kind of a relief. I thought I was some kind of magical freak, and as it turns out I'm only a practitioner of a magical form so arcane that it's been nearly forgotten about," Harry said feeling elated that he actually was something that, while rare, was known about and nothing so completely abnormal.
"Oh yes, Harry, it's an amazing opportunity for us to learn about the workings of magic in a way that we've never had the chance to ever before. The full abilities of the battle mage have never been completely documented. I must say I'm very excited about the researching possibilities."
Harry felt like his brief happiness had been crushed with a giant club. "No way. No way am I going to be your test subject. I refuse to be studied like some kind of insect under a magnifying glass."
"Harry, please, be reasonable. I'm sure that we can work something our that would fit into your normal schedule."
"Normal schedule? Why do you think I'm here, old man?" Harry said feeling his anger begin to flare up.
"Aren't you here to resume your normal classes? To become a student here once again, back with your friends where you belong?" Dumbledore asked confused.
"If I was a normal wizard that's exactly what I would want. But I'm as far from normal as one could possibly be. I'm not here to pretend like I'm a helpless student while the grown-ups fight this war for me. It's my destiny to kill Voldemort. Mine! There's no point in denying it anymore! I'm here because it's the safest place for me to be, before I find and kill him! Harry Potter, your student, died over the summer. Voldemort killed him and now I'm what's left. I'm a weapon, plain and simple. Going to transfiguration and charms is completely useless to me as is attending a defense class that teaches things the sneezing hex and the pimple curse. This is a fucking war! And I'm the one who decides who wins! I don't have the luxury of pretending to be normal anymore."
"Harry, surely you must realize that you're not ready for this yet. There's still so much for you to learn, you're only sixteen. Your only concerns should be on sneaking past Mr. Filch on the way to the kitchens past curfew," Dumbledore said smiling, trying to inject a moment of levity.
Harry's face didn't so much as twitch as Dumbledore spoke. In a voice devoid of any emotion Harry said, "Headmaster, I am here to continue the training I have been putting myself through for the past month. Training that requires no assistance from you or your teaching staff. I have not returned to re-enroll myself as a student. The only reason I am here as opposed to any other place, is that while I am here, Voldemort knows that he can't touch me. He would never dare try a direct assault on Hogwarts. That makes this the safest place for me to be until I'm ready to face him.
"The terms of my staying here are as follows: First, I will not at any time be required to submit myself to testing or experimentation regarding my powers. Second, I will require a private room, away from the Gryffindors, and the rest of the students. Third, I will be exempt from curfew and the staff here will have no authority to hand down punishments on me. I don't consider myself a part of Gryffindor house now, anyway, so there really is no point in taking house points away from me as I no longer have a house.
"In return for you agreeing to all my requests, I will remain here, on the grounds or in Hogsmeade, so you'll know exactly where I am. If you don't meet my terms, then I'll leave. Plain and simple."
The twinkle in Dumbledore's eyes faded away as the aged wizard suddenly looked as old as he was. "I suspected that something like this would be your request. Harry, I can't tell you how much it pains me to see you like this. The prophecy can wait, Harry. You really shouldn't be so quick to throw away your childhood."
"Childhood? Childhood?" Harry couldn't believe what he was hearing. Had the old man finally gone completely senile? "I haven't been in a child in years, Dumbledore. When you're forced to go through what I have, it's kind of hard to retain innocence. After watching Voldemort murder Cedric while I watched, unable to do a thing I grew up more in one moment than most people do in years. A year later watching my godfather die for me, after I fucked up, I grew up more than most people do in their entire lives! And finally, after enduring a month of continuous torture, what ever was left of my childhood, whatever innocence was still in me, was washed away when I killed my captors as they screamed in terror! That's what I am! Not a child! I'M A KILLER!"
Harry would have sworn at that time that he saw a tear trickle down the headmaster's face. But it was so brief a moment before Dumbledore composed himself, that Harry would think that it must have been some kind of trick of the light.
The headmaster cleared his throat and said in a slightly raspy voice, "There are additional rooms in Hogwarts that are generally used for when the school is hosting guests. I don't see any problem with you using one for as long as you like. But I'm afraid I must insist that you return to normal classes and continue your education. After all, when the war is done you'll need to find a job somewhere, and you can't very well do that without your NEWT's. Not only that but the prefect status I gave to you over the summer is still fully in effect. I know being a prefect is something that you desired last year, and if it weren't for me you certainly would have become one. I believe this belongs to you," he said holding out a shiny prefects badge."
Harry sighed as he realized that the headmaster simply did not understand what he was trying to say. It wasn't that the old man was stupid, he was just too idealistic; too naïve. "Headmaster, you just don't understand," Harry said softly. "I'm not thinking about what I'm going to do after the war because it won't matter. Somehow, I know, I guess I've always known, that the price of defeating Voldemort is . . . my life. It's something that I've come to realize over the years. Everything in my life has always pointed to that being the way of things. It's my purpose in life. I'm not sad about it, I'm done feeling sorry for myself. I've accepted what I need to do. Its better that I carry this burden alone rather than drag others into it. If sacrificing my child hood, my dreams, my happiness is what it takes to make sure that everyone else has those things . . . that's something I'm prepared to do. If you can't understand this, then I will bid you good day."
The headmaster cast his gaze downward as he said in a voice that was barely recognizable as his own, "As you wish, Harry. You will not be required to go to classes or obey curfew."
Harry did not attempt to meet the headmaster's eyes as he got up from his seat and said, "I'll be on my way then."
"Wait, before you go, Harry. There's something I feel I must return to you. Ms. Chang gave this to me after that day in Diagon Alley," Dumbledore said he withdrew Harry's wand from someplace within his desk.
Harry couldn't believe it. He thought that his wand was lost that day in the alley. Harry didn't know why his hands were trembling as he reached out for his wand. As Harry took it from Dumbledore and felt the familiar weight in his hand once more, he couldn't help but have a warm feeling run through his body. As Harry held the wand longer he couldn't help but notice that the warm feeling he was getting was increasing. Soon his body felt like it was on fire, and where his hand held the wand it felt like he was holding a red-hot piece of iron. Harry tried to drop the wand but for some reason his hand had completely seized up around the wand and he was unable to let go of it. Harry let out a gasp of pain as the wood began to split and crack down the length of the wand. From within the cracks a golden glow could be seen pulsing along the length of the wand. It was almost as though the power of the wand was trying break free from its wooden prison.
Finally the heat died away and his hand stopped burning. Dropping the wand Harry clutched his hand only to be shocked. His hand was completely unblemished. There was nothing to indicate that it had been burning intensely just a moment ago.
Looking down at the wand Harry could see that the golden light from beneath the cracks in the wood remained but didn't seem to be spreading or pulsing as it was a moment ago. Looking to Dumbledore, Harry asked, "What the hell just happened?"
Dumbledore looked quite shocked but managed to say, "If I had to guess, what I would say is that your wand had bonded even more to you, Harry." As Harry's blank look Dumbledore continued, "You see, Harry, when a wand chooses a wizard they form a bond. As the wizard uses the wand more and more the wand becomes so used to channeling that particular wizard's power that the spells are more easily cast and the effects are stronger. That is why, even untalented wizards can cast spells at ease as they simply get older. Eventually, powerful wizards, can have wands that are so attuned to them that other wizards are unable to even use them. I've never seen a wand have that particular reaction to a wizard ever before, however. Might I try holding it again?" Dumbledore asked holding out his hand.
Harry gingerly picked his wand up off the ground, expecting to be burned again, but instead it just felt like it always had. Making sure that it wasn't going to start burning him again, Harry handed the wand to the headmaster.
Dumbledore only held it for a moment before dropping it and jerking his hand away as though he was stung. "I see, I was right in my earlier assessment, not only can no other wizard cast spells through your wand, it seems that no one other than you can even stand to hold it," Dumbledore said, as he checked his hand to make sure there was no damage.
Harry picked his wand up off Dumbledore's desk and said, "I've been practicing so much without it, I don't even know if I really want to even use it anymore. I'd rather not grow dependent on this again, as I would hate to be disarmed merely by losing my wand." Harry tucked the wand into a pocket in his robes and made a mental note to experiment with his wand later in the week.
"Harry are you aware the impact that you'll have on the wizard community, now that you've come back? I don't know how much you've been aware of, wherever you've been, but things have been rather grim since the Battle of Diagon Alley," Dumbledore said to Harry. "Attacks have become more frequent, more bold, and more people are losing hope that anyone can stand against the Dark Lord. Harry let me explain something very important. I know you've never asked for the life you have, and I know that if you could, you would gladly make all the fame disappear. But you are famous, and more than that you've become a symbol to the people. A symbol of hope. When you "died" over the summer, it broke the spirits of many people. Losing their most celebrated symbol in the war against Voldemort was a terrible blow. You cannot imagine the frenzy it will cause now that you've returned. You will be held up as a symbol, as a hero, more than you ever have been before. People won't know why, but they will look to you to lead them against Voldemort. Are you ready to be the hero of an entire world, Harry? Are you ready to deal with the fame and everything that accompanies it?"
"You mean, can I handle reporters stalking me and looking to take pictures of me as I sleep. Or if I'm ready to deal with reading the lies and gossip they're sure to print about me every week? Or merely the fact that I can totally forget about any kind of personal, or private life, and even my friends can expect to harassed by journalists and photographers?" Harry asked doing everything in his power to keep his emotions in check. "Well, headmaster, I have news for you. It's nothing that my friends and I haven't dealt with before. It's not like I wasn't already famous. I just hope my friends don't get caught up too bad in it," Harry said hoping that his friends would be able to keep away from most of the reporters and the gossip that would surely begin flying around.
"Just so long as you're fully aware of it. I really wish that this burden hadn't been yours to bear," Dumbledore said.
It looked like he was about to continue but Harry interrupted saying, "Headmaster, no one wishes that more than I. But it does not do to dwell on that which is beyond our control. I have a job to do, and nothing is going to stand in my way."
Dumbledore looked at Harry for a moment with shining eyes, twinkling like mad before saying softly, "I'm so proud of you, Harry. And I know your parents would be just as proud. You've turned into a far better man than anyone could have hoped for."
Harry didn't know what to say just then. He knew that his relationship with the headmaster had been very shaky up to this point. But it seemed now as though everything that had happened was so long ago, that it just didn't matter so much anymore. Harry knew that he would need Dumbledore to win this war and dwelling on a childhood feeling of indignation was a waste of energy.
Harry didn't say anything as he knew words weren't required for this. He simply gave the headmaster a slight smile and nodded.
Dumbledore, on the other hand, smiled so much, Harry wondered if his face would be sore in the morning. "Come then, my boy. I believe we can still catch the last bit of dinner. And I think you have a pair of friends who are no doubt trying with all their considerable might to break down the doors and come see you. I think they've waited long enough."
And with that Harry and Dumbledore left the headmaster's office and walked back to the Great Hall. The doors were both closed, but with a wave of the headmaster's wand, the doors opened revealing a very harassed looking teaching staff, and very unruly group of students. The room, which had been a chaotic frenzy of students and teachers mostly just yelling at each other, immediately quieted as Dumbledore walked in alongside the object of so much controversy.
"Harry!"
Harry heard his name being called, but before he could even look in that general direction he was nearly tackled by a very emotional, and surprisingly strong, Hermione. Harry didn't even realize that he was holding her with all his might until he began to feel her tears seep through his shirt where she was crying against his chest, holding him every bit as hard.
Harry looked up just in time to see Ron standing not very far off, with a few tears falling down his face. Harry knew he didn't have to say anything, but merely opened up a single arm, and in an instant he was hugging his best friends with one arm each. Harry knew that tears were streaming down his cheeks as he held on to his two best friends, but he just couldn't care any less at the moment.
For one brief moment, everything seemed to evaporate and all that Harry was aware of was his two best friends that he hadn't realized just how much he had missed. Harry couldn't honestly tell you how long they stood like that in their three-way hug, but however long it was, it didn't seem like it had been more than a few seconds.
As they broke apart Harry cleared his throat and was about to say something but looking at them both clearly now, he realized they didn't need him to say anything at all. Ron swiped away a tear from his eye and said, "Come on mate, have some food. It's not everyday you come back from the dead."
"Still obsessed with eating then, I take it?" Harry said a genuine smile forming on his face.
"Still? Are you kidding? I love food more with every day that passes," Ron said as though it was the most obvious thing in the world.
Ron turned to lead Harry over to the Gryffindor table, but before Harry could even take a few steps, yet another nearly hysterical girl was launched into his arms.
"Ginny," Harry managed to wheeze, as she was nearly crushing him.
"Harry, I swear if you ever go missing like that again, I'll -"
But Harry interrupted her smiling and saying, "I guess I'll just have to stay around here then won't I?"
"Damn straight," she muttered right before she kissed his cheek.
Harry was caught off guard by the kiss but didn't let it show on his face.
They sat down at the Gryffindor table despite nearly everyone's attempt to pat Harry on the back or hug him or, in the case of several of the older girls, give him full on kisses. Harry wasn't feeling very hungry at the moment so he wasn't eating very much, but he figured that if he got hungry later he could always go and nick something from the kitchens. Especially since curfew didn't apply to him anymore.
"Harry, where have you been?" Hermione asked when the throng of people around Harry finally went back to their normal seats.
Harry looked around before he leaned over and quietly said to her, "I really don't want everyone to know, meet me in the Room of Requirements after dinner and I'll tell you guys everything."
Dinner really didn't last very long, and despite the fact that Harry was beyond elated to be back with his friends, they weren't really talking all that much. It was as though they all knew that what they all had to say would be best said without anyone else around.
The food disappeared from the plates and the students all began to leave when Dumbledore stood up and called for everyone's attention. "Attention, everyone. As you are all now fully aware, Harry Potter has finally returned to us. After the battle at Diagon Alley he was not killed, but was taken prisoner by the enemy. After several weeks he managed to escape but not without sustaining very serious injuries. After he recuperated, he elected not to return immediately to Hogwarts but instead spend time at a location, which will remain undisclosed. I ask that you all do not pressure him to talking about where he has been."
Harry was grateful to the headmaster for saying that because it would save him the trouble of telling everyone what had happened since July. Hopefully the students would listen to the headmaster and not constantly hound Harry about where he was and why he didn't come back. But Harry's feeling of gratitude fell away as Dumbledore continued, "On a happier note I feel that in these dark times we must remember what we have in life that's good. That's why, in honor of Mr. Potter's return, I am happy to announce that in exactly one week Hogwarts will have a Halloween Ball, formal dress will be required. I apologize for the short notice but I'm sure you all won't begrudge me too much."
As soon as Dumbledore said the words 'Halloween Ball' almost every girl in the great hall gave some kind of excited shriek and immediately started talking amongst their friends about what they would wear and who they would go with. Harry actually managed to hear several girls complain about where they were going to get a formal dress on such short notice. Unfortunately, Harry also noticed that nearly every girl in the hall at some point or other gave him very appraising looks. Looking to Dumbledore with a very pissed off face, Harry couldn't help but smile as Dumbdledore just shrugged and seemed to say 'I just couldn't help myself'. Harry was pleased to see that the professors looked just as shocked as everyone else, and Snape especially looked as though he had swallowed something sour.
Harry turned to leave the great hall, but then he remembered that he was supposed to get his own room. Turning around to ask Dumbledore where he was supposed to go, he nearly ran into McGonagall who said, "Mr. Potter, the headmaster has informed me of the arrangements he has made with you. If you would follow me, I will take you to your room."
Harry thanked her and followed her as she led him through castle. As they walked out, McGonagall said, "The headmaster informed me that you no longer wish to be considered an official member of Gryffindor house, Mr. Potter. You do realize that this will mean that you will not qualify to be a member of the quidditch team any longer."
Harry looked at her and with his small bit of legilimency he was able to pick up her intentions of trying to convince him to return to return to Gryffindor tower. "I'm sorry, Professor, but there are far more important things than quidditch. The reason that I'm even asking for my own room is to make sure that everyone else has the opportunity to do things like quidditch. I'm not about to tell you anything that's happened to me since we last spoke, but what I will say is that I've changed far more than you can imagine. I've lost a lot of my childish illusions about life."
"We're only trying to what's best for you, Mr.Potter," McGonagall said.
"Except you have no idea what that is, so stop guessing and know that I have reasons for everything I do," Harry said in a rather sharp tone.
McGonagall stopped for a moment with a very surprised look on her face. Harry could tell that no student had talked to her like that ever before. It seemed as though she was about to take away house points before remembering that he no longer belonged to a house.
"I'm not a kid anymore, so stop treating me like one," Harry said.
McGonagall still said nothing but she did press her lips together more than Harry had ever seen her do before. They finally reached a rather amazing suit of what appeared to be golden armor. "Open," McGonagall said to the suit of armor, and to Harry's surprise the entire wall directly behind the suit or armor swung open to reveal a rather modest room. Harry saw a desk with a chair, a couch in front of a fireplace, and a door that revealed a bedroom. To Harry's surprise, even though the bedroom was a bit smaller than the dorm he shared with the boys in Gryffindor tower, the bed itself seemed quite a bit larger.
All in all, the room was pretty much exactly what Harry needed except for one rather important thing. "What am I supposed to do for a bathroom?" Harry asked.
"You can use any of the hallway bathrooms, but the headmaster suggested that I also give you the password to the prefect's bathroom as you're not very far from it," McGonagall said. "The password is 'emerald stream'. You can also change the password to your door now that you're in your room. If there's nothing else, I'll leave you to yourself."
After McGonagall walked out and the door swung shut, Harry changed the password to the door and took his trunk out of his pocket and unshrunk it. Harry removed all the books and placed them over near the desk, and unpacked everything else in the trunk before sliding the trunk under the bed.
Harry decided that he should get to the room of requirements now as he was pretty sure that Ron and Hermione would not like to be kept waiting. He made his way to the room, and upon opening the door found that Ron and Hermione had yet to get there. The room itself had become quite a cozy room, with a very comfortable looking chair and couch right in front of a very inviting fireplace.
Harry didn't have to wait very long for Ron and Hermione to show up. Harry was already sitting the in the chair so Ron and Hermione took the couch. Harry didn't wait for them to start asking questions before he asked, "What do you know about the attack on Diagon Alley last summer, and what happened immediately thereafter?"
Hermione spoke up, "A photographer from the Daily Prophet was in the alley that day, when the death eaters attacked, he caught almost the entire thing on camera. Here let me show you," Hermione pulled an old folded bit of newspaper out of her robes and gave it to Harry.
Harry unfolded the paper and watched in amazement as the moving picture showed everything that happened as soon as he began dueling the death eaters, and ending in a flash of green as Voldemort stood over Harry. Harry immediately felt his resentment towards his friends die away somewhat, if he hadn't known any better he would've thought that he had just been killed also.
Harry didn't say a thing, but he gave the paper back to Hermione and began to collect his thoughts. "Anything that wasn't in the paper, we found out from Cho. She told us about how you were already experimenting with wandless magic before the attack. She also told us about how you saved her over the summer," Hermione said.
Harry's thought turned to Cho and he asked Hermione, "How is she? I mean after the attack, how did she take it?"
Hermione answered in a rather subdued voice, "After the attack, she didn't take it very well. She said the last month of the summer was terrible for her and when she got to Hogwarts it was pretty obvious to everyone that something was horribly wrong with her. But then after a few weeks here she just turned herself around. She was laughing more, doing better in her classes. It was like she had finally gotten over whatever was upsetting her. I guess that would be you," Hermione said a bit shyly.
Harry cleared his throat and asked, "What about her . . . umm . . . relationships. You know what I mean . . . I mean, has she found someone else?" Harry already knew the answer to that question, but he couldn't help himself by asking it.
This time it was Ron who answered, "Yea, mate. For the past month she's been hanging around with this Stan bloke. I've met him a couple of times, he's a pretty good chap. Kind of annoying at times, but he's a good man. He's helped Cho through a pretty rough time. Not even I can find it in me to resent him."
Well that seals it, Harry thought. If Ron, of all people, can find it in himself to not hate this guy then clearly Cho picked a good man.
Not wanting to dwell on that particular subject any longer Harry began telling them about how he woke up in a dungeon presumably the next day. He told them about the anti-magic field and how he was able to keep himself alive after he siphoned the magic off the animagus book. He told them about how he was tortured by Malfoy every day and left to the dementors at night. Harry didn't tell them exactly how horrific the torture was, he just said that it was an "unpleasant experience". He told them how he learned the animagus transformation and escaped by transforming into his animal. Again, for some reason he didn't feel that it was wise to tell Ron and Hermione exactly what his animal form was. Harry just got the feeling that the less they knew about him, the less danger they would be in.
Finally Harry told them about how he killed his captors once he had escaped and burned Malfoy Manor to the ground. At this Hermione exclaimed, "That's why he said that!"
Both Harry and Ron simply stared at Hermione. Hermione blushed slightly before explaining, "The day after the welcoming feast, right after breakfast when the Daily Prophet was delivered and we all read about how Malfoy Manor had burned to the ground under "mysterious circumstances". Immediately after we left, I overheard Draco talking with his cronies, something about swearing revenge on the person who murdered his father. I thought it was strange that his father, who was still supposed to be in Azkaban was murdered the same night that his manor burned down. So I investigated it a bit and found out that he had been released along with a number of other death eaters under "special" circumstances and it had all been kept very quiet from the press."
"How the hell did you find that out, Hermione?" Ron asked with small amount of surprise on his face.
"I have my ways," Hermione said in a rather mischievous voice.
Harry was barely paying any attention, his thoughts were all centered on the son of the death eater scum that had tortured him for weeks. "He knew," Harry said in a voice so quiet and yet do deadly serious that it was impossible for Ron and Hermione to not understand how angry he was. "That son of a bitch, he fucking knew! He knew I was being tortured in his basement! I'll . . . fucking kill that little shit!"
Harry was quickly losing control over his emotions as his fingers began to flare up with small flames.
"Harry, calm down!" Ron yelled.
Harry snapped back into reality and realized what was happening and immediately reigned in his emotions and willed the flames on his fingers to die away. Harry took several deep breaths before he turned to his very shocked friends and apologizing for his outburst.
"Its alright, mate," Ron said. "How did you do that, with the fire on your fingers?"
Harry told them exactly what Dumbledore had told him about how when he lost control of his emotions his magic would respond by leaking out his skin in the form of fire. He also told them that he was trying to better control that ability for it's obvious uses in battle.
After that Harry explained how it was a similar, but much more severe, loss over control of his emotions which had resulted in the fire that consumed Malfoy Manor. "I guess the effort involved in controlling the flame with such precision and intensity really drained me of my magic and nearly killed me. When the aurors arrived and found me unconscious they took me to St.Mungo's. Apparently, I was in some sort of a coma for twenty days," Harry said.
"Why was it kept a secret? How come we never knew that you were alive?" Hermione asked with unshed tears shining in her eyes.
"I'm not sure how Dumbledore found out so quickly about me, but he tells me that my condition was so severe that he thought it best to memory charm the aurors that found me, and the medical staff at St.Mungo's. He thought that it would be cruel for people who cared for me to be informed that I was alive and then die in a hospital bed soon thereafter. So that's why the press never found out about me. As for why the esteemed headmaster chose not to tell you three that I was still alive at some point, I guess you'll have to ask him," Harry said with no small trace of annoyance in his tone.
Ron and Hermione looked confused for a moment before Hermione asked Harry, "Why did you say "you three" as far as I can tell, there's just Ron and me?"
In an instant Harry realized that she was right and that he had unwittingly referred to . . .
"You're talking about Cho, weren't you?" Hermione asked softly after Harry had stayed silent.
"I . . . look if he had said something she wouldn't had to have been in so much pain. I mean all of you! None of you deserved to think I was dead when clearly I wasn't!" Harry said on the verge of yelling. "Then she wouldn't have run off with that fucking cock-knocker," Harry muttered to himself.
Unfortunately for him both Ron and Hermione heard what he said. "Harry," Hermione said, "Stan has been really good to Cho. She deserved some comfort after what happened. We all did."
Harry looked at Hermione, confused for a moment, and then looked at Ron. What does she mean, "we all deserved comfort"? Oh my god! Harry thought as he suddenly realized what was right in front of him.
"You two? Together? Holy shit!" Harry said. "That's . . . I can't . . . well I'm glad you finally figured it out! Damn, I thought you two would never realize that you're both retarded for each other. Congratulations!" That's the first bit of really good news I've had in a long time! Harry thought.
Hermione blushed and smiled shyly as Ron said, "Thanks, mate. Weren't sure how you would take it, I mean more than a few people were shocked when got together. Apparently they all thought that we could never stop arguing long enough to ever get together."
"Perish the thought," Harry said, grinning like mad.
"So you were in a coma for twenty days, and nobody knew about it except Dumbledore?" Ron asked.
"Well to be technical, the head healer at St.Mungo's also knew, but he didn't tell anyone," Harry said.
"So then, after you woke up, why didn't you come back to Hogwarts?" Ron asked.
"I did," Harry said darkly. There was a few moments silence that Ron and Hermione both knew better than to interrupt. Finally Harry said, "It was the night of September 21st, I'm not going to tell you how, but I made it here pretty quickly after I ran away from St.Mungo's. When I got here, I had every intention of finding you guys and letting everyone know exactly what had happened to me."
"What happened?" Hermione asked.
"I ran into Cho first," Harry said, his voice devoid of all emotion. "She was outside with that . . . Stan, and I saw them kissing. No, I amend that, I caught them making out as though their lives depended on it," Harry said with a sneer somehow working its way into his voice.
"Harry," Hermione started in that same tone of voice when she explained how nice a guy this fucking Stan was.
But Harry interrupted her practically yelling, "No, Hermione! You just don't get it, do you! She told me she loved me! That day in Diagon Alley she said she fucking loved me! And yet, two fucking months later she's in the arms of another guy! I mean, what kind of a cold-hearted bitch would do that?" Harry had to stop and take a few breaths, calming himself down to the point where he could talk normally. "After seeing that, I just snapped. I completely lost control of my emotions. My memory is actually kind of fuzzy, but I'm pretty sure I ran to the quidditch pitch and just lost it. My magic flared up worse than it did at Malfoy Manor, and the result was one hell of bloody huge fire," Harry said.
"That was you?" Hermione asked. "I remember that, the windows all shattered and the fire was absolutely enormous, I think the entire school saw it. We could feel the heat from it in the castle," Hermione said, awe filling her voice.
"Yeah, its not exactly something I'm proud of," Harry said. "The exercises that I've been doing in occlumency and fire-calling, has helped me avoid outbursts like that. I don't want to lose control of myself like that again."
"Wow," Ron said. "I guess I can understand you wanting to get away from that, but why did you stay away for so long after?"
"Well after I saw Cho and the whole fire thing, I made my way to London that same night. Long story, short, I decided that you all deserved to live a bit without me in the way. I know you don't want to hear this, but I put you guys in danger by being your friend. No, Ron, its true!" Harry said to Ron, who had opened his mouth to protest. "I figured that if I just let the world believe that I was dead that you guys would be safe and free to live your lives the way you were meant to. Even . . . Cho. I may not like it, but she deserves the chance to have a normal boyfriend.
"So while in London I found a bar and proceeded to get completely trashed in honor of me leaving the wizarding world. When I woke up I was in a rather nice apartment with a very beautiful girl next to me, and we were both naked."
Harry couldn't help but smile and Ron and Hermione both gasped and looked as though they couldn't possibly be anymore surprised. Ron was the first to recover and just as a best mate should grinned and said, "Way to go mate! Was she hot?" Of course, this earned him a slap on the arm from his girlfriend.
Harry laughed and said, "Well I'm not generally one to kiss and tell, but I will say that I thought she was stunningly beautiful. More importantly, she was just a really great person. I'm not sure what my intentions towards her were originally, but she asked if I needed a place to stay for a bit, and I accepted."
Harry then told them all about Natalie, but he didn't tell them her name, he wanted to keep her identity a complete secret from the wizard world. He told them about her roommates, and how he came back to Hogwarts the next day to grab his trunk. Then how he went to Diagon Alley to get some money and saw the monument they had of him. He told them about he bought books in Flourish and Blotts and also in Knockturn Alley. Then he told them that since doing all that, all he's been doing was training himself to get into better physical shape and better harness his magic. Harry spared them no detail, except for names and specific locations.
"I'm not sure how it happened, but this girl, I completely fell for her. I mean, yeah there was a lot of sex and that was pretty fun. But it was so much more than that. I mean everyday I would just look forward to being with her, it was like I couldn't wait just to hear her voice," Harry said explaining his relationship with Natalie to Ron and Hermione.
"Well I guess I can understand now why you would be rather reluctant to leave a place where you were getting laid every night," Ron said grinning.
Harry looked at Ron for a moment before saying, "And you would know why shagging is great again . . . how?"
Ron opened his mouth to say something, but before he could Hermione slapped his arm again and said, "I don't think you need to know the intimate details of our relationship, Harry."
Harry smiled and said, "Ah, but you already just told me everything I needed to know about the intimacy level of your relationship. Don't worry, Ron, we can swap stories later."
Everyone got a good laugh out of that and yet again Harry thanked whatever higher power there was that he was back with his friends again.
As soon as they had stopped laughing Harry resumed his story saying, "So earlier today, we all went out shopping at this mall. And go figure, with my luck it just has to be where the entrance to St. Mungo's is. So, of course, during the attack I made my presence known and helped the aurors. But of course –"
Harry would have continued, but was interrupted by Hermione saying, "What attack on St.Mungo's? What are saying? St.Mungo's what attacked today?"
Harry looked to Ron and Hermione, disbelief etched on every inch of his face before he asked them, "You mean, you don't know?"
Both of them merely shook their heads, their eyes wide in trepidation at the news that was about to be delivered.
Harry took a breath and said, "Earlier today, death eaters attacked St.Mungo's. I have no idea what the casualties were, but what I do know is that the fighting spilled into the muggle mall, where I was with the girls. The aurors showed up just in time to give the death eaters some more targets. The attack was just brutal. Death eaters killed or cursed everyone and anyone they could, they killed wizards as they ran alongside muggles that didn't realize what was happening. The aurors didn't do a goddamn thing to stop them. The death eaters were picking them off, one by one. I had to do something. So I stepped in. When it was over all but one of the death eaters was dead. The aurors all got a good look at me, so my secret was out.
"Now that everyone knows . . . or will know, that I'm back, I figured that I should get back to Hogwarts. My being alive puts you both in danger once again, so I wanted to come back and make sure that nothing happens to you. I also needed to get away from the girls, if a death eater saw me with them, they would all certainly pay the price of knowing me."
"Harry you shouldn't talk like that," Hermione said.
"Talk like what?" Harry demanded, feeling himself grow a bit angry. "Talk like we live in a place called "reality" where there are evil people who would not hesitate to do terrible things to you guys because they know it would hurt me. God dammit, Hermione! Grow up! This is a fucking war and there are people who want to see you bloody fucking dead!"
Hermione now had tears streaming down her face as she managed to choke out, "Why are you such a target, Harry? Why does Voldemort want you dead so much? Why do I get the feeling that you're more important to this war than we know?"
Harry cast his gaze downward, hesitating to tell them the contents of the prophecy. Casting caution into the wind, as Voldemort already knew most of it, he made his decision. "Remember the prophecy we grabbed at the Department of Mysteries last term?" They both nodded. "Well the prophecy was smashed so nobody heard what it said. But the person who originally witnessed the prophecy told me the contents. Sixteen years ago, just before I was born, Headmaster Dumbledore witnessed Professor Trelawny make a real prophecy. She said that the person who would have the power to defeat the dark lord would soon be born. She gave several criteria that could only fit me and one other person. Voldemort managed to obtain this information and so decided that this "potential threat" should be taken care of. So he murdered my parents to get to me. When the curse rebounded and left me with this bloody scar the rest of the prophecy began to unfold. You see, what Voldemort didn't hear, was that this person would be marked as his equal. The rest of the prophecy states that in the end it comes down to him and me. One lives, and one dies. The fate of the world rests on that one decisive battle between Voldemort and me. I've just told you something many people would kill to know, I would advise that you not let on that you know any of this."
Ron and Hermione both stared at Harry with jaws agape. "Blimey," Ron managed to mutter.
Hermione just looked as if she had been told that Harry had two weeks to live.
"That's why I need to train so much. Voldemort has power that I just can't beat right now. If I ever want to have a chance against him, I need to prepare with every moment I have. I don't have the luxury of letting someone else worry about it. I don't have the time to get caught up in silly schoolbooks, or in sports. That's why I'm not officially a part of Gryffindor house anymore. But on the plus side, I get my own room and I don't have to worry about detentions or curfew," Harry said, trying to lighten the mood just a bit.
But it looked as though Ron and Hermione had just been pushed too far to find anything humorous about the situation.
Harry, sensing that they had pretty much had enough for one night said, "Well, its getting pretty late. We should probably be getting to bed. I'll see you guys tomorrow at breakfast."
Standing up, Harry and Ron both slapped each other's shoulders in an affectionate way. As they left the room of requirement, Hermione pulled Harry into another hug and she said softly into Harry's ear, "I'm so glad, you're back, Harry."
"Me too, Hermione. Me too," Harry said as they let go and went their respective ways off to a night's sleep that would hold anything but rest.
A/N: Wow! Thank you all so much for yourglowingreviews of chapter 10. That one chapter nearly doubled my review total. I just want you all to know that I will most definitely continue the story and finish it.That wasby far one of the best chapters of the story and if no one had liked it I think I would have just gone and . . . cried.One more thing, if you have any questions about the story that you want answered in an e-mail, I would always me more than happy to give it to you. But I can't help you out if you review anonymously and don't give an e-mail address. Some people asked me to give them e-mails when it was impossible for me to do so and I just wanted to let them know that I wasn't being a dick or anything like that, I just simply couldn't do it. One more thing, a lot of you said that you would much rather have Harry end up with Natalie in the end. I'll be honest, I never really intended it to work out that way . . . but the story isn't finished yet. If enough people tell me to ditch Cho (and it would take quite a few) then I could definitely finish the story differently than what I had originally intended. Again, thank you for all the reviews, they really provide a lot of motivation to write. I would have had this chapter up quicker but I just finished all my finals and have been in a drunken haze for the past week or so . . . good times.
Cheers - Midnight