A/N: This fic is definitely not for kiddies. In fact, it's probably my darkest fic yet. I've never written another like it and I can't say for sure that I ever will again.If themes involving violence and rape disturb you, turn back now. To all Ron fans out there, I'm sorry if this offends you. Come to think of it, if you're a Ron fan, you should probably turn back now too.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. J.K. Rowling does. 'Kay?

Masochist

She was alone in the library, as usual. She couldn't help it, she liked to read, even though it usually meant being all by herself in the dim library at half-past midnight. She sighed. She'd tried to talk Harry and Ginny into coming with her, but they'd had others things to do…like each other. Again, she sighed. She knew they were a couple of horny teenagers who were also in love, but it was getting ridiculous. They were together all the time. But why should it bother her? She supposed she was jealous. After all, she had no love of her own. She thought she had one once…

Her vision of the typewritten letters in her latest reading interest began to blur. She thought back to Sixth Year. It had been a good year. Or so it seemed. She'd had a lover back then. No, perhaps lover was the wrong word. After all, they'd never had sex. She'd had a boyfriend back then. She thought she loved him. But she was wrong. She thought he'd loved her…wrong again.

"Hello, Hermione."

She chilled at the sound of his carefully accented voice. She froze in her seat, hoping he'd take the hint and leave her alone. He didn't. As she heard him take a footstep closer, her mind was flooded with memories of the year before.

May

Hermione leaned closer and whispered into Ron's ear. "I like you." They were alone in the Weasley's house and Hermione was finally brave enough to reveal her secret feelings to one who had been a dear friend to her for so long. He grinned. "I like you too." They kissed tenderly. They began dating the day after.

August

"I love you, Ron", she whispered. He leaned in closer to her, touching his forehead to hers. "I love you too, 'Mione." They kissed deeply under Harry's invisibility cloak that had disguised them on their way to the backfield, where flying lessons were given. Hermione looked up at the stars and sighed deeply. Life was perfect.

October

"May I have this dance?" he asked her teasingly. Her cinnamon eyes lit up and she smiled at him. "It would be my pleasure." Together, they glided along the floor in almost-perfect rhythm as the band played a sweet slow number. Though somewhat corny, the "Fall Ball" of Hogwarts was to be one of their fondest memories.

December

"What were you doing alone in your dorm with Pansy!" Hermione yelled. "I think it was pretty obvious what we were doing, Hermione! I know you're not that innocent! You must have a pretty good clue as to what—"

"Okay, okay, I get it", Hermione interrupted. "How could you do this to me? And why were you doing it with her?"

Ron sneered in a rather malicious way. "Because you wouldn't give it to me. I don't know why you have to be Little Miss Untouched Perfection, Miss 'I'm Saving Myself for True Love' when half the school is already screwing around. God, you're such a baby!"

"I'm not saving myself. I just don't feel ready to have sex yet. And especially not with you!" She stormed out of the library, leaving the two-timing Ron Weasley to sit alone in the dark. It was half-past midnight.

The next day, the seven-month relationship ended.

The sudden rush of memories chilled Hermione even more to the core. It was exactly eight months to the day of the break-up, a longer amount of time than the actual relationship. Although what they'd had was only puppy love and hadn't even lasted very long, the break-up had dealt a great deal of pain to Hermione and a tremendous blow to Ron's ego.

He took another step forward.

She remembered the months after the break-up. How he'd glared at her in the hallway, how he'd left notes taped to her desk addressed to "The Evil Ice-Hearted Bitch", how he'd started horrid rumors about her that floated around the school for the rest of the semester. She also remembered their secret meetings in the library each month, all on the exact day of their break-up. It started innocently enough. The first month, he had come to win her back. She politely refused and began to walk out. He grabbed her by the wrist and demanded she stay. She became afraid and after a few minutes of struggling, screamed out for help. She was found by Professor Snape and Ron was given detention for the rest of the month.

The months after that were only worse. Each time she turned him down, he grew a little more violent. After the third month, he'd taken to casting temporary time-freezing spells so there was little to no risk of them being found by a teacher or anyone else. Each time, she'd walked away with no worse than a bruise or two and a few scratches.

She sensed that this time would be worse.

He stood directly behind her now. "Miss me, 'Mione?" God, she'd been a fool to be in the library after dark. What was she thinking? Of course, even if she'd stayed in her dorm room, he would've found her. And with his time-freezing spells, which were beginning to last even longer, she wouldn't have been safe.

"I said, did you miss me, Hermione?"

His breath reeked of alcohol. Great, he was angry, drunk, and he held a magic wand. She was in so much trouble. He leaned in from behind to whisper in her ear. "Have you come to your senses? Have you decided to take me back? Hmmm?"

Still, she did not speak, hoping that this time would be different. Maybe he would grow frustrated and leave her alone. She should've known better.

"I asked you a question, bitch! C'mon, spit it out, Mudblood!"

In all the time she'd known him, Hermione has never heard Ron call anyone a mudblood. Anger filled her and she leaped out of her chair. "How dare you!" she screamed, raising one arm to strike him. "Ah, I see you're fighting back. At last", he said, grabbing her arm in mid-swipe. He squeezed her wrist tightly, grinding her bones. Tears filled her eyes, but there was nothing she could do. He was much stronger than she was. "Now, about that answer."

Hermione became acutely aware of the silence that filled the air around them. Even when she spoke, her voice sounded vaguely as if it were in a bubble. He'd done it again. He'd frozen time. He apparently knew that this confrontation would take a while.

"You know the answer, Ron. I am not going to be yours again. Not ever yours! After what's happened between us these past few months, I have to say that I'd be a damned fool to even consider a new relationship with you of all people! You bastard!"

Ron's eyes darkened from fury. Hermione knew that speaking to him like that would probably get her killed before the night was over. She didn't care. She would probably be killed anyway. And she certainly didn't intend to go down without a fight. If years of sexual tension and months of barely repressed fury were going reach boiling point tonight, she would go down as a fighter, not as Ron's masochist.

"You stinking bitch", he growled. He tightened his grip on her wrist even more so and flung her against the wall. Hermione hit the stone with a thud and crumpled to the ground. She started to crawl away, but Ron seized her again, this time by her upper arm. "Where you going?" he sneered. "The games are just about to begin. And we've got all night to play." He punched her in the stomach and then slapped her hard across the face. She was beginning to lose some consciousness, but quickly regained it as Ron threw her down on the table where she had just began reading. Again, her senses began to blur, but as before, she shook it off and stayed awake. The second she passed out, Ron would most likely kill her. He liked for her to stay awake. It was a sign of strength, retaliation. She didn't know why he preferred for her to fight back. Perhaps it amused him.

Ron drew his wand and muttered something strange. An icy wind from the wand blasted her and she knew instantly that she had been paralyzed. She still had all five of her senses, but for the life of her (and it probably was), she could not move any part of her body. She couldn't even blink.

As Ron came closer to her, she saw the pleasure mixed with evil in his eyes and realized she had made a terrible mistake by ever getting involved with him. He was a sociopath. She was filled with ice-cold terror as the revelation hit her. She should've known. After all those times she'd secretly watched him as he sneaked into the experimental lab after hours, after she'd heard the brief bleats of pain issued from whatever small animal he was torturing in there, after living through his brief but violent rages from all their "meetings" before, she should've known. Oh, God, the dragons. Three years ago, Hagrid had hatched a small nest of Bulgarian dragons. When they began to disappear one by one and were each found dead after a few days, the kids had been puzzled. But looking back on it, all signs pointed to Ron.

"Y'know what I'm gonna do to you, 'Mione?" Ron asked, jolting her from her thoughts. "Oh, that's right. You can't answer me. Where are your smart-ass comments now, bitch?"

Hermione's eyes were beginning to water, partly from terror and partly because she hadn't blinked in about eight or nine minutes.

"As I was saying, tonight I'm going to take the one thing from you that you would never let me have. Your virginity. And I assure you, I won't be gentle."

Terror, magnified then more than ever before, gripped Hermione and a hollow sensation filled her chest. She knew that if she lived through this night, she would never be the same again.

Ron ripped her rather short skirt open and tore her lacy undergarment off. After taking a moment to unzip his trousers, he climbed on top of her and gripped her hips tightly, drawing tiny trickles of blood with his fingernails. He drew back and with one mighty thrust, ripped through to her very core, sending lightning bolts of pain throughout Hermione's every nerve ending. She attempted to scream but could not.

He began moving at a vicious pace, each thrust more painful than before. Tears trickled down Hermione's cheeks and silently, she prayed for mercy. Minutes later, as Ron grew closer, an astounding thing happened. She blinked. The spell, not yet perfected by Ron, was wearing off. A tingle started in her arms and she twitched a finger. In another few minutes, she regained almost full use of her left arm. Just as she was through devising a good way to escape, Ron came, thrusting into her one last time. This thrust was more painful than when he first entered her. He filled her up completely and she glimpsed a river of blood spreading between her legs. Just as Ron was about to crawl off of her, she quickly jerked her arm forward and gouged out his eyes.

They found her the next morning, crouched in the farthest corner of the library, unconscious, but alive. They found Ron crumpled beside the table, in a pool of blood, most definitely dead.

The End