Have you ever been called an "evil munchkin" before? I must say that until today I haven't. When I opened my email though and saw a plethora (love that word) of reviews, I was extremely excited. I got a nice round 5 reviews for Chapter 2 (1 less then what we were hoping for) and 7 for Chapter 3! I was happy! The very last Review I readwas by the lovely DarkFallsTonight, who called me an evil munchkin. I've never been called this before. I'm not very tall, I admit, I'm kind of short, but...not enough to have ever been called a munchkin. Took me a few minutes to recover--DarkFallsTonight, my dear, Thank you. That was a very nice surprise. Your review has been printed, that part highlighted, and it now has been pined to the board in my room for every one to see that yes, I've been called an evil munchkin, and I'm proud of it!
Quote of the Day! "Suicide is not the answer. There is no honor nor redemption in that." --Kurama. Once again fitting, only for a different reason. (Might I mention KyoHanaonce more?)
Warnings: Tears! Lots more tears! Lover's fighting. Umm...Mentions of murder, noactual murder though. And of course...OC! Because we all love OC in this story, don't we? OH! Cliff hanger type thing, we're blasting to the past next chapter! And the end of this one prepares us for it! Probably a bit misuse of the Jagan because of this blast to the past, but I rather like it this way, makes it easier on Hiei.
Rating: This is like, PG ok, this chapter, is extremely mild. But, because the rest of the story is M...
Kurama rested up against his mail box and waved as the truck pulled away. He glanced at the letters in his hand. Like most everyday, it was all junk. He channeled his energy, the energy that he had gotten from Hiei when they joined their spirits and the letters were soon nothing more than ashes. It was than when he felt it, a familiar presence. He looked down the road to see a figure starting down his way. He couldn't tell who it was, but he had the strange feeling he knew the person. He stood waiting.
He could see Kurama's hair waving in the wind. After going to his first destination to announce his return and apologize to them for leaving and being reprimanded, praised, and smacked a few times, he was finally given an old out fit consisting of a white T-shirt and a pair of jeans and a random jacket that had become too small. Now he headed to Kurama's house, with sunglasses on, and his hair hidden by a baseball cap.
"Hey there…" Kurama called out. He lifted a hand.
"Hey…maybe you could help a fellow out."
"Where you headed?" Kurama asked as the shorter man came closer.
"I'm looking for this person's house."
"Well you're going the wrong direction than, I'm the last house here for miles."
"Really now…" The man pulled out a piece of paper and handed it to Kurama.
"Would this be your address?" Kurama nodded.
"Yes, this is my house."
The man smiled and looked down and pulled off his baseball cap, he ran his fingers through his black hair and took of his jacket than looked up while taking off his sunglasses. Kurama gasped.
"Good…I like it a lot…" Hiei whispered. Kurama fell to his knees and clutched onto Hiei tightly while crying. Hiei bent down next to him and smiled.
"I missed you so much Kurama…"
"Hiei…oh Hiei!" Kurama cried. Hiei smiled and hugged him tightly.
"I promise I'll never leave you again…" he whispered placing a chaste kiss on Kurama's cheek.
"I still love you Hiei…I still do," Kurama cried looking at him straight in the eye. Hiei smiled, his crimson eyes dancing with joy as pools of emerald, filled with happiness, love, and sadness stared into them.
"Not a day has gone by where I haven't loved you," he replied.
Kurama cried and pulled Hiei close to him. Hiei started to silently cry as well, letting the gem stones fall down to the ground as they held on to each other on the dusty road, with no one to see them, no one to ridicule them, and most of all, no one to pull them apart ever again.
Hiei looked around the house quietly as Kurama fixed them something to drink. He sighed, it would take some time to get used to the house and make it home. Kurama walked in with two glasses of lemonade and handed him one.
"You look like you're about to jump off and run Hiei. Sit down and make yourself comfortable…" Kurama requested as he placed his glass down on a coffee table and fiddled with his stereo so they wouldn't have to deal with the deadly silence they had both come so accustomed to.
"Yes of course…" Hiei whispered as he moved to the couch and sat down. Kurama smiled and sat down on the opposite couch. They sat in silence listening to the music playing. Hiei bit his bottom lip.
"It's…been awhile…" he said. Kurama nodded.
"Yes it has…" Hiei nodded and sipped his lemonade.
"So you…didn't have work today?" he asked. Kurama nodded and put down his lemonade.
"Yes, well I took two weeks off for vacation. I did the same thing last year you see…I was—I had hoped you would return…well…yes…" Kurama stopped trying to explain and Hiei nodded.
"I understand," he said. Kurama nodded and they sat in silence. He suddenly stood up.
"I have to call some one…Excuse me…"
Hiei nodded and watched as Kurama walked to the kitchen and picked up the phone and started dialing. He quietly stood up and looked at the pictures on the mantle. He smiled as he saw a few of Kurama and his mother, some of their friends, and one that was framed in a golden framed with the words "I Will Always Love You" engraved on it of both of them together. He frowned and fingered the picture. They looked so happy, so in love and Hiei had to go and ruin it. He shook his head when he saw a small corner of another picture sticking out behind it. He took down the frame and took off the backing. He pulled out a set of small pictures that they had taken together at a photo booth. He smiled as he looked at each one remembering what Kurama had promised him in return.
"Those were some good times…" Kurama whispered behind him. Hiei turned quickly.
"I—um…yeah…they were…" he replied quickly.
Kurama smiled and took them from his hand. He traced each one smiling. The first one was of him pulling Hiei into the booth, than of Hiei scowling as Kurama smiled, the third had mainly Hiei trying to figure out what was going on as Kurama, barely seen in the background tried to pull him back. The fourth had Kurama giving the shocked koorime a kiss on the lips, and the last one showed a happy Kurama hugging a blushing and slightly smiling Koorime.
"So who did you have to call?" Hiei asked hurriedly. Kurama smiled and put the pictures back.
"Yusuke, he made me promise that if you showed up or anything happened I would call…" he replied. Hiei nodded than looked up.
"What else would've happened besides me showing up?" he asked worriedly. Kurama looked down sadly.
"I can name a million things, but now is not the time, after all you showed up, didn't you?" Kurama looked up at Hiei and smiled. Hiei smiled back than took a deep breath and looked around.
"So, you going to give me the grand tour or what?" he asked. Kurama nodded and led him through the small two story house.
"The downstairs is mainly the kitchen, living room, office, a small powder room and the laundry room, upstairs is where the bedrooms and two other bathrooms are…" Kurama explained as he started upstairs. Hiei followed him nodding.
"So the bedrooms upstairs, what are they used for?" he asked getting to the top of the stairs. Kurama led him to each one.
"There are only four, this one here I use to grow Makai plants that I can't grow outside. This next one, well it's just empty I haven't decided what I'm going to do with it yet. Than of course my bedroom, and than finally…this…" he opened the door.
Inside the room was a small futon and a few other things with a few boxes inside. Hiei stepped in and looked in one of the boxes, all of his personal items, the ones that Kurama complained about most, and his most dearest treasure were carefully packed away.
"What's all this stuff doing in here?" Hiei asked looking up. Kurama smiled standing in the door way.
"I decided that you needed your own personal space, like I have my gardens, you have your room. You can train, sleep, and do anything you want in here, just as long as it doesn't affect the rest of the house…"
"In other words I can't catch the walls on fire or break the window?" Kurama chuckled and nodded.
"Yeah, that's about the gist of it."
"And you don't come in here?"
"Not unless I have permission to do so…"
"So I can paint the walls like black and you can't come in and complain?"
"Nope, but I would love to come in and help you paint the walls black, that way you don't disappear for a few days doing nothing but painting…" Hiei smirked and nodded.
"I like it…a lot…and look! Now I can't be banished to a couch! I've got my own futon!" Kurama laughed and rolled his eyes as Hiei jumped on to the futon and relaxed.
"No, you can still be banished to the couch…I have my ways." Hiei smirked and snapped his fingers suddenly.
"I need to get that jacket, I've got some stuff in there…" he said jumping up and flitting off. Kurama stayed put as two seconds later Hiei was back on the futon emptying out the oversized jacket.
"Inari Hiei! Is there anything you don't have in there?" he asked watching tons of things fall out into a big pile on the futon. Hiei smirked.
"The kitchen sink…could you get it for me?"
Kurama shook his head and rolled his eyes will slipping down to the floor to watch Hiei sort through his stuff. He smiled as Hiei tossed him his little stuffed Fox. At closer examination he realized it had been put through much abuse.
"Do you think he's fixable?" Hiei asked. Kurama nodded.
"My mother can stitch him back up and clean him for you…" he said. Hiei smiled, than went back to his pile. Kurama watched him closely, holding the small plush close to him. He watched as Hiei's eyes darkened as he touched his sword.
"Maybe it's time to get you a new sword?" he whispered. Hiei nodded and swallowed a lump in his throat as he put it off to the side and than pulled up the clothes he had worn.
"Now these just need to be burned…a shame, it's my favorite outfit…but I fear they are beyond repair."
"You'd be amazed what my mother can fix. Now with the clothes though, I suggest cleaning them before she gets them." Hiei scrunched his nose.
"Yeah…that'd be for the better…" he said, tossing those to a corner. He looked at the other small trinkets that he had collected and pulled out of the small pile a deep purple rose. Kurama gasped.
"You still have that!" Hiei nodded.
"Yeah, I thought it would die…but it didn't, so I decided to keep it until it did, and it's still going strong." He glanced over at Kurama. "Just goes to show you how powerful you really are." Kurama smiled and nodded.
"So what are you going to do with it?" Hiei shrugged.
"Keep it, obviously…" Kurama rolled his eyes.
"And here I thought you were going to eat it…"
"Well I almost did back in Makai, I was really hungry…but that's beside the point." Kurama stretched slightly and looked at his watch.
"Well, you can keep going through all of that if you want…I'm going to start dinner," he announced standing up. Hiei looked down at the pile.
"No, these just need to be burned too…" he said standing up. Kurama nodded.
"What would you like for dinner? It's been a while since I've cooked for more than just myself…" he stated. Hiei walked to the door and closed it, than shrugged.
"Whatever, it doesn't matter to me. I haven't had a meal worthy enough of being deemed good in three years, so it could be burnt popcorn and I wouldn't care much…" he said. Kurama nodded.
"Well than, let's go see what I have and throw something together." Hiei nodded as they went downstairs. He grabbed the stair rail with his left hand without thinking when Kurama stopped suddenly.
"Hiei…"
"Yes?" Hiei turned and looked at Kurama.
"What happened to your finger?" Hiei looked down at his hand; around his left ring finger his skin had been burned black where his ring would normally reside.
"Oh…that…"
"Yes that…what happened? You weren't stupid enough to wear your ring around your finger in the Makai were you? You know that could've gotten you killed!" Hiei rolled his eyes and pulled out a chain from under his shirt where his engagement ring hung from.
"It's a long story. And I'm not stupid, trust me…" he said pulling the ring off the chain and slipping it on his finger. Kurama noticed how much bigger it seemed, meaning Hiei had lost a lot of weight. He also noticed the way Hiei grimaced as it rested around the burn. He wrapped an arm around Hiei.
"Let's order pizza, and eat some sweet snow, I think I have some chocolate mint left in the freezer." Hiei smiled.
"That sounds good," he said as they walked down the stairs together.
Kurama listened from the office as Hiei grumbled flipping through stations again. He hadn't even been back for an entire day and he was already back to his old habits. Kurama put down the book and shook his head. A bit of hair fell into vision and his vision clouded.
"Fox!" Hiei said. Kurama could hear him headed to the study. He quickly wiped his eyes and stood as if nothing happened.
"Yes Hiei?" he asked. Hiei looked at him strangely.
"Are you ok?" he asked quietly. Kurama smiled and nodded.
"I'm fine…what is it you need?" Hiei glared at Kurama.
"What I need is not important…you don't look to good, maybe you should go to bed." Kurama laughed and shook his head at Hiei's request. He moved out from behind the desk.
"No, no, I'm fine Hiei. It's really no big deal." Hiei looked at him than crossed his arms.
"Prove it…"
"What?"
"Make a rose, a yellow one, and prove that you're ok."
"How will that prove anything?"
"You once told me that sometimes when you were feeling really emotional and weren't in battle that you could pull the same seed that you use for the rose whip and make it any color rose in the world. That's what you did with the purple rose, so make a yellow rose!"
"But Hiei I'm not really emotional…"
"Exactly, so if you can't make a yellow rose, than you're fine…" Kurama laughed and shook his head.
"You're logic is horrible Hiei…"
"Make a rose Fox…"
"Hiei I'm fine."
"Than why won't you make a rose? I remember a Kurama who would jump at the chance to show off his skills, so make a rose." Kurama was growing angry. Hiei stood at the door way just staring at him. Kurama shook his head.
"I don't feel like it," he said, anger creeping into his voice as he moved back behind his desk.
"You don't have to get angry, just make a rose Fox." Kurama's vision clouded again and his eyes burned.
"No."
"Yes."
Hiei knew he was pushing his luck, but he had to see for himself if what Koenma had said was true. He had to see if Kurama really did give up on his plants, and he had to see if Kurama still loved him and cared for him enough to tell him the truth. Kurama turned away from Hiei and pretended to busy himself with other things.
"I don't have time for this nonsense…"
"Since when is caring for you nonsense Fox? Since when is creating a small rose nonsense? The one time I told you that you were insane creating frivolous little roses all the time I almost got killed. So since when is this nonsense?" Kurama turned around with tears streaming down his face. He glared at Hiei with all he had.
"Since you left," he hissed. Hiei choked. Pain ripped through him like a knife through butter. He didn't cry though, and he didn't give up on his intent gaze into Kurama's eyes.
"Are you afraid of telling me? Of telling me what you did when I left?"
"You have no room to talk, after leaving with out a word. And still now you haven't said anything about what you were doing in Makai!"
"That's different!"
"I don't see how!" Hiei backed down at that. He looked away and swallowed.
"Kurama please…" Kurama shook his head.
"I don't owe you an explanation Hiei. I don't need to tell you anything. You're lucky I let you back…" Hiei looked up quickly.
"LET me back! You LET me back is that it? So what, now you're regretting the decision? Well excuse me for ever coming back this pathetic world! Excuse me for worrying that maybe you weren't going to be alive when I returned, that maybe you had killed your self! Let me just go grab my stuff and than you can LET me leave!" he shouted. Kurama slammed his fist down on his desk.
"Don't talk like that Hiei! Inari I missed you so much it hurt! I almost did die because of the pain you caused me! Before I explain anything to you maybe you should explain a few things to me, like why you had to leave so suddenly and what compelled you to stay away for THREE YEARS!" Hiei growled as Kurama glared at him with tears streaming down his face.
"Why did I even bother? I knew coming back would only lead to more pain. I knew from the start that none of this would've ever worked out. I knew you could never love me as much as you swore you did. But I got caught up in it, fell for it, and fell for you. This is pathetic." Kurama balled up his fists.
"You brought the pain upon yourself as far as I'm concerned! And frankly Hiei, you're right, I don't love you as much as I swear I do, I love you even more than that! But you're too stubborn to realize that! So fine than, run away again little Hiei! Run back to Mukuro or whoever seduced you to stay in the Makai for so long!"
"It wasn't Mukuro!"
"Oh that's likely! Who was it if it wasn't Mukuro? You're sister? Or did Koenma actually have a job for you that you couldn't tell anybody about? And if so who was the blessed demon who got to have you as their plaything for three years?" Hiei shook his head and closed his eyes. His energy flared.
"Shut up…just shut up," he whispered.
"What's wrong Hiei? Did I hit the jackpot? Are you afraid? Are you scared that maybe, just maybe you screwed up bad enough by running off with Mukuro, or Yukina, or some other dimwit?" Kurama screamed. Hiei grimaced.
"Shut up…" he mumbled again.
"No! I will not shut up! You ran away with no explanation, you come back three years later with no explanation, but you expect me to tell you everything that I've done? You expect me to just accept the fact that for three years of my life I was a complete wreck without you by my side, that I had nothing to look forward to and no hope for anything without any particular reason why? Hate to burst your bubble but it isn't happening! So who was he? Or was it a she?" Hiei screamed.
"It was my FATHER ok? MY FATHER! I had NO choice! I thought the man was dead and he wasn't! But he is now! SO SHUT UP!" Hiei shouted before disappearing upstairs. Kurama fell to his knees and choked for air.
"His father? He left…and I…" Kurama sobbed for air than tried calming himself down before getting up and heading upstairs to his room to grab a few things.
Hiei sat on the window sill of his room shuddering. Kurama's words rang through his ears and his reply stuck fresh in his memory. He thought of being in Makai and almost vomited. Shaking he looked outside wearily. He decided that the next day he would leave; he would go to Yusuke's explain that things didn't work out and disappear from all of their lives forever. He wouldn't go to Koenma and ask for a special pass back to Makai, he'd stay in the Ningenkai and mask himself as a normal human so they would never know where he was. He would even go move to another country. A tear gem fell on to his lap. He looked at it disgustedly and threw it hard across the room. It dented the wall and fell to the floor. He let out a choked sob than turned back to the window and brought his knees to his chest. He felt the smooth metal against his finger. He scowled and went to remove it, and throw it, like he had done with the gem, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He brought it close to his heart and clutched it there.
"This pain won't leave me alone for as long as I live…and it's your fault Fox…it's your fault for loving me…" he whispered. His thoughts were interrupted by a soft knock on his door.
"Hiei? Are you in here? May I come in?" Kurama's voice called. Hiei glared at the door.
"What do you want?" he hissed. He could hear Kurama's sigh of relief.
"Oh good, you haven't left. Hiei, we need to talk…can I come in?" Hiei shrugged.
"It's not locked…"
Kurama sighed and walked in carrying a box. He closed the door and looked at the small dent in the wall and the tear gem laying on the floor. He sighed and went to the center of the room where he placed the box and than sat down on the floor.
"That final night, the night when you came in through the window. After that I tried so hard to live life normally Hiei. But one month later, I felt angry at myself and I didn't know why. I thought it was my fault you had run away and I didn't know what to do. I sat at my mirror just thinking to my self and looking at my hair. For some reason looking at it made me remember the first time we met, when my hair was in that short boys cut. Than after that, at the Dark Tournament when Karasu ran his fingers through it after the fight, and I scrubbed it so hard my scalp was bright red. And I remembered all the times you had ever brushed it, and it made me angrier. So I started brushing it, I brushed out all the seeds, and I was still not happy, so I cut it.
Yusuke showed up, one of the neighbors heard me scream as I cut my hair and went to make sure I was ok. She found me a total wreck, so she called him. He came and helped me out. I was a delusional wreck for two months. I don't even remember what happened during that time, except that I stayed with Genkai and she would drug me at nights so I could sleep, and I had no outside contact with the world. I was considered too dangerous.
After those two months I calmed down, I started going back to work, but I stayed with Genkai. One month later I was living with Yusuke. That lasted about 4 months, until they moved me into my mother's. She took care of me. I told her everything, our relationship, and who I really am. And she accepted it all. Six months later I was back in the apartment, four months after that I moved here.
When I was living with my mother, the one year anniversary of you leaving came. My hair had grown longer than it had been, and I cut it back to the usual length. One month later I cut it back to the shorter cut. On the second year anniversary I did the same thing. This year, today, this morning, I cut my hair again…" Kurama pulled the sets of pony tails out of the box and laid them out for Hiei to see. Hiei looked down at them with sadness filling his eyes.
"Why?" he whispered. Kurama shrugged.
"I'm not sure myself, I just…I felt like it had to be done, so I did it." Hiei shook his head.
"Didn't they ever try to stop you?"
"Yusuke did…he hated seeing me with short hair. He hated seeing me without you, without a smile…without hope. But he accepted it, because it helped me deal with losing you."
"You make it sound like I died…" Kurama looked up. His emerald eyes pierced Hiei.
"In a way, you did…" he whispered. Hiei looked down quickly and bit his bottom lip.
"And the seeds?" Kurama sighed and pushed the box forward.
"I sorted them, stored them, and the last time I touched them was about a year ago when I decided to make that extra room a place to grow some Makai beauties. And than I only took out five seeds and that was it, only 3 of them are actually growing currently."
"And not a single one is in your hair."
"Exactly…" Hiei sighed and looked out side.
"I'm sorry," he whispered. Kurama shook his head.
"Don't be, I did it to myself. I didn't prepare myself properly when you had left, it was my fault."
"It didn't help the way I left you…"
"No…it didn't, but I'm willing to over look that…" Kurama said. Hiei smirked.
"I thought you said you wanted an explanation…" Kurama smiled.
"Oh I do, don't get me wrong, you owe me big time. But…I think I can wait until you're ready." Hiei nodded and the room went into silence. Suddenly Hiei turned and looked at Kurama.
"Did you ever know your parents?" he asked. Kurama looked at him.
"Excuse me?"
"You're Youko parents…did you ever meet them?" Kurama stopped and thought about it.
"No I don't believe I did. I think they were killed when I was extremely little. I was taken into one of the few Youko tribes that had started forming preparing for some war. They believed that I would be a good tribute to them, for I was a rare silver Youko. They found out quickly that silver Youko's grow into their mythical powers very slowly, and are usually weaker than most Youko's when they are young. So I was shunned quite a bit, until I left the tribe out of my own decision. Why?" Kurama looked up at Hiei. Hiei looked down and outside.
"My parents…well you know the story. What I can't figure out though, is why my father didn't even think to bring me with him when he left. He knew I was damned to die just like him. But he disappeared without trying to save me, or to at least pull my mother out of that horrible situation. You would think that two people like them would've had to have been madly in love with each other in order to pull off what they did." Kurama nodded slowly.
"I just don't understand…and now I guess I never will." Kurama looked up at Hiei.
"What do you mean?" he asked. Hiei sighed.
"Fox, if you held the life of your parents in your hands, what would you do?" He looked over at the kitsune, tears forming.
"I'm not sure…I have no memories of them what so ever, I don't have anything really to hate them for…I shouldn't think that I do at least. Why Hiei?" Hiei shuddered.
"I killed him. I ran my sword through the sick bastard, and I enjoyed it. I'm just like him, just like he said…" Hiei bit his lip to muffle a sob. Kurama rushed forth and pulled him off the sill and into a tight hug. Hiei held onto him tightly.
"I was stuck there for a year, in his clutches. It was so horrible, I was chained to the walls and forced to soil myself, in fear of removing my clothes even slightly, in case he happened to be watching." He sobbed and Kurama rocked him back and forth gently.
"Shh…Shh Fire Baby. Just calm down and tell me everything my sweet Fire Baby." Hiei sniffled and buried into Kurama's warmth.
"I had been receiving messages from Mukuro for about a month before I finally left. They kept telling me about how she knew where my father was, and for a price she would tell me. The day I had proposed to you I had gotten another message from her that morning, while you were still asleep. It simply stated that my father knew about me, and it was a matter of utmost importance.
After you left to deal with Yusuke I got dressed and headed to Makai to meet with her. She told me everything she knew, including the fact that he was out to get me for some reason. I told her that I would be back the next day to discuss more about the matter and went back home and prepared everything. I had been debating whether or not I was going to propose to you for a time, but I decided that I had to, I had to know that when I got back I would still have you, if I got back. I felt horrible about it, but I did it anyways. That's why I cried so much more than you, I loved you and I already knew that I probably wouldn't be able to hold or see you for at least 2 years afterwards.
When I left the next afternoon I met with her again. She begged me again to rejoin her, but I declined telling her that perhaps, once you returned to Youko, I would consider it for a while, not forever, but for a short period of time. With that she hooked me up with a guide who would help me get to the deepest parts of Makai. I told them I had to collect a few things, and came back, said my final good bye and went back and started my year long journey with the foulest of all creatures ever." Hiei let out a choked sob and Kurama held him tightly. Carefully he unwrapped Hiei's Jagan.
"Perhaps it would be easier to show me?" he asked quietly. Hiei looked up at him with the Jagan glowing and nodded slowly.
"Ok…"
Ironically, I'm listening to Gravitation: Super Drive. Yay for yaoi! We're at the half-way point my friends. 4 more chapters left and then I'll be leaving you. Let's do as good as we did last chapter, shall we try for 8 reviews this time? You guys only failed me once! Don't fail me again!
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