Hey! What's happening! Spring Break is over tomorrow! Do you know what that means? It means I haven't updated in a really long time! Sorry guys. I just really don't want to go back to school! I hate school! I don't even remember if I had homework. I'm pretty sure I did, but whatever. Am I rambling yet? Not quite? All right then...palomitas (anybody know what that is?) sounds real good right now. I'm hungry. (Someone whispers something in her ear.) Oh. Okay. I'm officially rambling. Go read now!
Mr. Dude: wow. She can really ramble. Oh, she owns Kokiri Krispies and nothing else. Especially not the lines off the Zelda cartoon. Oh, and I am pleased to inform you we now have a narrator! We are so cool! But this is the narrator's first time narrating, so be kind.
Yes, be kind. I have few words for you before we begin. A 5-year plan: you know you want one! Maybe if Link had one, he wouldn't have had to cross-dress...I mean, I didn't say anything about what's going to happen!
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Tani, MooMoo, and Navislowly made their way to where they knew the Super-Moblin was waiting.
"Hey! Listen! It's gonna be dangerous up there!" Navi yelled.
"No shit Sherlock." Tani mumbled.
"Poor Sherlock can't shit." MooMoo said.
"Anyway, Link is in trouble, so we need to go help him." Navi said.
"We?" Tani asked skeptically. Navi was going to...do something helpful?
"And when I say we, I mean you." The fairy finished.
"Typical." MooMoo rolled her eyes, watching the two bicker.
Meanwhile... Link had been being held captive by the Super- Moblin
"Let me go! I am but a humble peasant looking for bread!" Link cried. (Man he's a bad liar!)
"Yah sure. I don't believe you, but I will give you one chance to leave. If you answer my question correctly, you may leave." The S-M said.
"And if I don't answer correctly?"
"Oh then I'll kill you." The S-M said quite calmly. Link gulped.
"Doesn't look like I have any other choice..."
So, when Tani and MooMoo (Navi had been sling-shotted and was now stuck in a tree) walked into the clearing, they saw Link yelling at the S-M.
"And what?"
"That's all there is to the question."
"But that doesn't make any sense! And what!" Link yelled, waving his arms madly. Tani walked up to him, looking a bit scared.
"Uhm, Link? What's goin on?" Tani asked, confused. "That's the bad guy, right?" she whispered to Link, pointing at the S-M. Link nodded and began whispering back.
"Well yah, but right now I'm figuring out this question, it's the only way to make him leave me alone. The question is really har-" Link was interrupted by the S-M mid-whisper.
"You know I can hear you, right? You're not allowed to ask for help!"
"But!"
"It won't hurt if I just hear the question will it? As long as I don't say anything to Link here?" Tani asked, smiling mischievously. The S-M nodded.
"I guess...Here is the question: What is the difference between a bush?"
Link had expected to see Tani looking as confused and hopeless as he was, not for her to jump up and down exclaiming, "I know this one! I know this one!"
"What?"
"I told you! When I got my bo-"
"You cannot speak to him!" the S-M spoke, cutting her off.
"Fine then!" Tani said huffily. Tani went to the side of a clearing and began to shake a bush madly. She then looked at Link and put her hands in her armpits. She then moved her arms back and forth and bobbed her head.
"Ok, I get it. Charades. Is that allowed?" Link asked, looking at the S-M. The S-M nodded. First was a...bush? What does that have to do with anything? I get back to that. Then you..." He trailed off, looking at her. She moved her wings back and forth again. "You're a Cucco?" She shook her head. And MooMoo quaked. "What? Why did you...? Oh! She's a duck!" Tani nodded fervently. "Okay. What does that have to do with anything?" Tani pointed from the bush to one of her wings. "Uhh...I don't get it." Tani pulled a leaf off of the bush and shook it at Link. "A leaf? What?" She pointed to her wing and shook the leaf again. "A duck with leaves?" Tani fell to the ground. She stood back up and shook her head. "But ducks don't have leaves." Tani jumped up and down and nodded like a madwoman.
"The question Link, think of the question!" MooMoo said.
"Okay. What is the difference between a bush? And a...duck?...Tani showed me a duck doesn't have leaves, so...Hey! Moblin!" Link yelled to the S-M.
"That's Super-Moblin to you kid!" (Honestly, I've been referring to him by S-M for a while now Link! What did you think it stood for? Stupid-Monkee? Come on now...)
"Whatever. I have your answer!"
"Oh do you?"
"A duck has no leaves!" Link said confidently. The moblin looked as though he had just been kicked in the teeth by a midget.
"No, not the all-powerful question! How? How? How! I...you...cheeses...uhhhhhh..." And so the heroes witnessed the demise of the Super Moblin of the Lost Woods.
"Okay. Let's move on, then?" MooMoo said, walking forward. Tani however ran over to Link and glomped him mightily.
"You did it! You did it! You figured it out! I guess I misunderestimated you. There's hope yet!" Tani said, marching after MooMoo. Link sat on the ground, confused. It was not the first, nor was it the last time he had been confused that day. He figured out Tani's weird acting, and she hugged him, and...
"Link! There you are! What happened!" Navi said, flying over to him. Her wing looked oddly bent.
"Huh? I'll explain later."
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The group walked towards the pedestal, and just as they reached it...
"STOP! Don't take another step, or she'll have you!" The crazed person was none other than...
"Sheik! What in the world is going on?" Link asked, looking at the poor, messed up Sheikah.
"There's no time for that now..." Sheik replied, eyes wide. "Link, you must get away from here! It's dangerous!"
"So? What's your problem anyway? We're trying to get to the temple, so if you could just move..." Tani said, stepping towards Sheik and onto the pedestal.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Sheik screamed. "She'll know you're here! I cannot stay, or she'll catch me again!" With a loud crack, smoke filled everyone's eyes. When it cleared, they looked up to see...Sheik still standing there.
"Hate when that happens. You get duds sometimes. Aha. GOODBYE!" With another loud crack, Sheik disappeared. About a second later, maniacal laughter filled the clearing. However, this failed to fill the heroes with much terror due to the fact the laughing fiend choked and tee-hee'd.
"What the hell was th-" Tani was cut short as a large black thing dropped out o the sky and hit Link squarely on the head.
"What is this supposed to be?" Link asked, sitting up and rubbing the big bump on his head. The thing in question was large, square, and had two blue arrows and two pink arrows, all pointing in different directions. Link stared at it for a second and Tani squeaked.
"Oh I haven't played that in ages!" she exclaimed picking it up happily. She looked at it, shook it and flipped it over. "Where's the music?"
"What is that?" Link asked, climbing to his feet.
"It's a DDR pad, duh. Man, you really have been out for seven years. But this seems like a newer version. My old one didn't have an A button in the middle. Guess they were updated when I was off with my sister..."
"You have a sister?" Link asked, interested.
"This is a really fun game." Tani said, changing the subject back to the pad.
"You didn't answer my question."
"Dance Dance Revolution. You step on the arrows as they come up on the screen and you get a score. But there's no screen..." She trailed off. Link saw it was obvious she wasn't going to talk about her sister, so he followed her lead and ignored it.
"Okay, so it's a game?" He asked. Tani exhaled. She almost blew the secret! They would have killed her!
"Yup." She nodded.
"Show me how to play?"
"I would, but there's no screen or music. If there was, I'd throw it on the ground, like so, and step on start. See?" Tani said, pointing out the button. Link stepped on the pad and pressed start. To everyone's great surprise, a screen appeared out of thin air.
"Welcome to DDO, Dance Dance Ocarina." The screen spoke.
"Hey Link, maybe you can use this, because your ocarina blew up!" Navi observed.
"Good observation, Captain Obvious." Tani said as she rolled her eyes. "Give it a shot." She said, shrugging her shoulders at Link. He pressed start again.
"Go with Beginner, Link." Tani advised. He chose Beginner Level and looked at the songs.
"Oh cool! There's already Zelda's Lullaby, Epona's Song, Saria's Song, the Sun Song, the Song of Time, and...Minuet of Forest? What's that one?" He asked, confused.
"Must be the one to warp here." Tani aid, pointing to the pedestal they were standing on. "Play it."
"Alright." He said. He wasn't to sure about this whole thing. The arrows began to come up.
"Step on the button as it comes to that bar Link! Tani cheered. "A!"
"Perfect!" the game chimed.
"Up!" Tani coached.
"Good!"
"Left!"
"Perfect!"
"Right!"
"Perfect!"
"Left!"
"Great!"
"Right!
"Perfect! Alright!" The game said. It played the Minuet of Forest.
"Good job Link! You're really good at this!" Tani cheered, smiling brilliantly. Link blushed.
"It was just beginner's luck." Link said.
"Don't be so modest!" Navi said.
"What do you think, MooMoo? MooMoo?" Tani asked. The cow in question was nowhere to be seen. Tani looked around more, but it was no use. "You guys!" Tani yelled to Link and Navi. "MooMoo's been kid-napped! I mean, cow-napped! What are we gonna do?"
"Good riddance." Navi muttered. Tani glared at her.
"You're gonna find yourself in a tree again I you don't watch out."
"..."
"That's what I thought." She said. She looked towards the entrance to the temple. "Link, you got your items back right?"
"Yeah, except for my slingsh-" He narrowed his eyes at her and she sweat-dropped.
"Eheh. Yah...well, anyways..." she said, changing the topic. "MooMoo might be in the temple, so. To get up there, you gotta pull out your hooks-" she stopped short with a horrified look on her face. "Link?" she asked. She looked like she was gonna die.
"What? What is it?" he asked, worried. Tani was now crying.
"You d-don't have y-your Hookshot, d-do you?" she asked, lip quivering. Link shook his head. Tani wailed.
"How did I forget!" she cried, throwing her arms up in frustration. She began mumbling to herself. "I was supposed to...go to the graveyard...then come here...get to the temple...how did I forget! I'm wasting time...she's gonna kill me..."
"Who?" Link asked. He was definitely worried now. Tani looked him, eyes wide.
"Shit. Uhh...Anju, you know, the Cucco lady? Yeah, I was...gonna...help her...catch the Cuccos!" He finished, smiling.
"You'd have to be really thick t-" Navi began.
"Alrighty then." Link said happily. Navi face-faulted and Tani sweat dropped. (The sweat-drop was the size of Canada! No! New Zealand! NO! Australia!)
'I can't believe he believed me!' Tani thought to herself. 'I am a good liar though.' But Link is not as stupid as she thought he was once. (I love that movie!) He knew something was up. But Tani wasn't gonna talk about yet, so he might as well play along.
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"So...I need this Hookshot thing?" he asked as they made their way across Hyrule field towards Kakariko Village.
"Huh? Oh, yeah. We gotta go get it from that dead guy-"
"What! I hate zombies! If it's a Re-dead!"
"Oh, no don't worry." Tani said. Link sighed. "It's just a ghost."
"I hate ghosts! Have you ever seen a ghost?" Link asked. He began flapping his arms. "Fwoohoohoo!"
"Okay okay! We'll figure somethin out once we get there okay?"
"Fine. Stupid ghosts..."
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"Well, we're here." Tani said. They were indeed. Link looked around at all the graves and shuddered.
"oh come on Link. " Navi sighed.
"I don't like ghosts. I kill them...they come BACK. I can see through them. I hate see-through stuff!"
"Not a big fan of Jell-O I take it?" Tani joked.
"Huh? Never mind, I don't even want to know. So, why were you covering your face the whole way through town?" He asked, her smile slid right off her face.
"Uhh...well, the people in this town...let's just say I'm none to popular around here."
"..."
"Well! Link, you're gonna have to race Dampe. He was the keeper of the grave yard. You met him? Yeah, well now he's a-"
"Ghost, I know. But I already told you that I don't like ghosts! I am not going up to one and suggesting a nice game of tag!" Link in a trying-to-be casual voice, and he failed miserably.
"Fine, ya baby. I got an idea. Dampe will race someone who looks like you right?"
"I guess so."
"Alright then, take off your tunic."
"That'd take way too long."
"Link!"
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Ha! Don't worry; it's not nearly so bad. Link's just a little...yeah. You should all be happy! This chapter was so long, I had to cut it in half! So yah, this is only half. I'll post the other half ASAP! I have to work on The Prince more. He has an unpleasant split-personality disorder right now. Yeah, you'll see what I'm talking about so. Review please!