A/N-chapters may come out little more slowly now...Im having trouble being humourous. Plus the upcoming scenes are a little more difficult to do humor with than others...heh, so please, be patient! You know, it's so wierd. all the feedback ive gotten has been very positive, saying that it's hilarious, yet I read it, and it's not that funny to me...hm, guess it's like my friend, Kiersti says "You cant tickle yourself and make yourself laugh." (see, I DO pay attention!) k, ill stop rambling now!
~*~*~
TC quickly dragged Merry off of MC and began beating him. "Leave her alone!" she screamed. MC quickly dragged her friend away from Merry. "What?! I'm getting revenge for you!"
"Um..."
"Oh no...you..."
"I wanted to."
TC looked stunned, and disturbed. "No! No! This is NOT right!" she looked at her friend in disgust.
"Guys, we don't have room for all of you." Legolas informed, not looking sad at all (his hair had not recovered from TC and MC's little stunt in Lothlorien. He knew exactly who he wanted to leave behind, and was sure Aragorn felt the same).
"Well you and Aragorn can run pretty fast!" TC replied.
"We are not running!" Aragorn said.
"Why not?"
"Why do you think?"
"Guess we can only take two of you...Merry and Pippin!"
"Well, here we run into a bit of a problem..." Pippin said. "See MC and TC will not be separated. Merry will not leave MC behind...I think that's a mutual feeling now." Pippin shuddered slightly. "and me and Merry will not be separated. so it's either all of us, or none of us."
"I guess it's none then!" Legolas began walking towards his horse.
"LEGOLAS!" Aragorn yelled. "We cannot leave Merry and Pippin out here with those two! That'd be worse than leaving them here alone!"
"Thanks!" TC stated sarcastically, punching Aragorn in the side (being that she could not reach much higher) as hard as she could manage (which was not very hard to Aragorn). The ranger glared down at her. She quickly ran out of reach.
"So what should we do?" Legolas asked.
"Who's that?" TC asked, staring at someone coming up in the distance. Aragorn and Legolas were conversing, and didn't deem anything TC had to say as important.
"Which hobbit are you talking about?" Pippin thought TC was looking at the two liplocked hobbits standing in front of them.
"I don't think that's a hobbit!"
Pippin looked MC and Merry up and down. "I'm pretty sure whichever one you're talking about IS in fact, a hobbit."
"PIPPIN!" TC yelled, suddenly realizing what Pip was talking about. "NOT THEM! LOOK! Off in the distance!"
"ARAGORN!" Pippin screamed, startling Aragorn and Legolas. Even Merry and MC were startled. "IT'S THE WHITE WIZARD!"
"Saruman!" the ranger assumed, staring at the oncoming rider.
"Great, we get rid of one geezer, and another one shows up!" MC complained.
"Actually...it looks like the same geezer we had before." TC observed as the rider neared them.
"Hey! We have room for all of us now!" MC pointed out, happily. Aragorn and Legolas's spirits fell at that discovery, as they had still been hoping to leave TC and MC behind.
"GANDALF!" Legolas screamed. Gandalf reached them and there was a happy reunification (excluding TC and MC, but they didn't wish to be included anyways), in which Gandalf told about his fight with the Balrog, and how he came back. "We must go to Edoras!" Gandalf said, patting Shadowfax.
"I am NOT riding with TC and Pippin!" Legolas demanded firmly.
"I'm not riding with MC and Merry!" Aragorn decided as well. "And I don't think it would be wise to let MC and Merry, or TC and Pippin, ride together."
"Yes." Gandalf agreed. "And it would be to cruel to make one person deal with both TC and MC." The mentioned hobbits looked indignant.
"I'll take MC and Pippin!" Legolas quickly volunteered, knowning that MC was easier to tolerate than TC (though, not by much).
"I don't want TC!" Aragorn yelled.
"What? Like I really wanna ride with you?" TC retorted.
"You can ride with Gandalf."
"No!" Gandalf yelled firmly. "I'm riding with the dwarf." TC sat on the nearby boulder and looked down sadly. Aragorn didn't seem to have a choice. Legolas was loaded and Gandalf refused.
"Fine..." he surrendered.
"I don't wanna ride with Merry!" TC screamed from behind Aragorn. "I wanna ride with PIPPIN!"
"Yes, TC, you have made that clear!" Aragorn said through clenched teeth. TC and Merry had been complaining the whole time, and he was trying as hard as he possibly could to keep his temper under control.
"And I REALLY don't wanna ride with TC!" Merry yelled, in front of Aragorn. "I REALLY wanna ride with MC!"
Legolas was having similar problems.
"I REFUSE TO RIDE ANY FURTHER WITH MC!" Pippin yelled stubbornly.
"You don't have a choice!" Legolas told him, trying to ignore that the hobbit had just elbowed him (hard) in the stomach. "But I wouldn't care if you jumped off the horse!"
"I WANT TO RIDE WITH MERRY!" MC screamed commandingly, causing Legolas to jump (partly because of the noise, partly because he still wasn't used to the fact that MC LIKED Merry).
Suddenly, TC flew off the horse. Well, actually, she was thrown off the horse. Aragorn was looking quite pleased with himself. Legolas and Gandalf halted their mounts, so Aragorn had to as well.
"I cannot ride with those two any longer!"
"We might as well just humor them." Legolas suggested. "But I am still NOT riding with TC and Pippin!" Legolas recalled the trouble that TC tended to cause.
"That's fine, because I'm not riding with MC and Merry!" Aragorn replied. The hobbits switched horses, except TC, who remained standing on the ground, her arms crossed. "TC, get over here!"
"No! Not until you apologise!"
"NOW!"
"NO!"
Aragorn jumped off his horse, walked over to TC and dragged her over to the horse and mounted up. By now, MC, Pippin, and Merry had discovered why TC complained so much--it was fun! Their complaints did not cease.
"I don't wanna sit in back!" MC whined (though she really couldn't care less). "I feel like I'm gonna fall off!"
"So hold on!" Legolas said in annoyance.
"I don't wanna hold on to YOU!"
"So shut up!"
"Don't wanna do that either!"
"Too bad!"
Aragorn was not faring any better.
"Your sword is touching my leg!" TC complained. "And it's not cool!"
"Would you rather I got rid of my sword?"
"Yes, I actually would feel more comfortable if you did..."
"Well I'm not going to! So deal with it!"
"Aragorn..."
"WHAT PIPPIN?!"
"The saddle horn is rubbing my balls!"
"I DON'T CARE!"
"ARAGORN!"
"TC YOU DON'T HAVE TO YELL!" Aragorn yelled, not realizing his irony.
"We're too close to the other horse! Legolas's foot is touching mine!"
Aragorn moved the horse over to the right.
"Now Gandalf's staff is touching my foot. Or maybe that's Gimli's axe..."
"TC!" Aragorn screamed, causing everyone to jump, "SHUT UP!" TC blinked a couple times, as if that was a concept she hadn't grasped yet.
"LEGOLAS!" MC shouted.
"WHAT?!" The elf cried, his nerves were wearing very thin.
"I can't see Merry."
"And I can't see MC!" Merry added.
"Your quiver is right in my face!"
"SO SCOOT BACK!" Everyone stared in surprise at the Elf's (second) outburst.
"I'll fall off!"
"I know!"
"I'm bored." MC said, several hours later.
"Me too," TC agreed. Merry and Pippin stated that they too were bored. Legolas and Aragorn became frightened, knowing no good could come out of this situation.
"Let's swordfight!" MC suggested.
"On horseback?" TC asked, doubtful.
"Sure, why not?"
They drew their swords and began fighting the best they could (which was not easy on horseback, when the horse is galloping, and you're on the horse's rear). TC soon won, because MC lost grip on her sword, and it fell to the ground.
"Legolas!" she screamed. "Stop the horse! I need to get my sword." TC quickly sheathed hers.
Legolas halted his horse (as did Aragorn and Gandalf), so MC could grab her sword. They confisgated the hobbits' swords.
For Aragorn, Legolas, Gandalf, and Gimli, the trip to Edoras took twice as long as it should have. The hobbits' complaining continued the WHOLE way there. As soon as they were inside the city, the hobbits were evacuated from the horses.
"GET AWAY!" Aragorn screamed, a pure sight of insanity at that moment.
"AR-A-GORN! THEY. WILL. NOT. HURT. YOU!" Legolas spoke slowly, separating every syllable.
"Yes they will."
~*~*~
TC quickly dragged Merry off of MC and began beating him. "Leave her alone!" she screamed. MC quickly dragged her friend away from Merry. "What?! I'm getting revenge for you!"
"Um..."
"Oh no...you..."
"I wanted to."
TC looked stunned, and disturbed. "No! No! This is NOT right!" she looked at her friend in disgust.
"Guys, we don't have room for all of you." Legolas informed, not looking sad at all (his hair had not recovered from TC and MC's little stunt in Lothlorien. He knew exactly who he wanted to leave behind, and was sure Aragorn felt the same).
"Well you and Aragorn can run pretty fast!" TC replied.
"We are not running!" Aragorn said.
"Why not?"
"Why do you think?"
"Guess we can only take two of you...Merry and Pippin!"
"Well, here we run into a bit of a problem..." Pippin said. "See MC and TC will not be separated. Merry will not leave MC behind...I think that's a mutual feeling now." Pippin shuddered slightly. "and me and Merry will not be separated. so it's either all of us, or none of us."
"I guess it's none then!" Legolas began walking towards his horse.
"LEGOLAS!" Aragorn yelled. "We cannot leave Merry and Pippin out here with those two! That'd be worse than leaving them here alone!"
"Thanks!" TC stated sarcastically, punching Aragorn in the side (being that she could not reach much higher) as hard as she could manage (which was not very hard to Aragorn). The ranger glared down at her. She quickly ran out of reach.
"So what should we do?" Legolas asked.
"Who's that?" TC asked, staring at someone coming up in the distance. Aragorn and Legolas were conversing, and didn't deem anything TC had to say as important.
"Which hobbit are you talking about?" Pippin thought TC was looking at the two liplocked hobbits standing in front of them.
"I don't think that's a hobbit!"
Pippin looked MC and Merry up and down. "I'm pretty sure whichever one you're talking about IS in fact, a hobbit."
"PIPPIN!" TC yelled, suddenly realizing what Pip was talking about. "NOT THEM! LOOK! Off in the distance!"
"ARAGORN!" Pippin screamed, startling Aragorn and Legolas. Even Merry and MC were startled. "IT'S THE WHITE WIZARD!"
"Saruman!" the ranger assumed, staring at the oncoming rider.
"Great, we get rid of one geezer, and another one shows up!" MC complained.
"Actually...it looks like the same geezer we had before." TC observed as the rider neared them.
"Hey! We have room for all of us now!" MC pointed out, happily. Aragorn and Legolas's spirits fell at that discovery, as they had still been hoping to leave TC and MC behind.
"GANDALF!" Legolas screamed. Gandalf reached them and there was a happy reunification (excluding TC and MC, but they didn't wish to be included anyways), in which Gandalf told about his fight with the Balrog, and how he came back. "We must go to Edoras!" Gandalf said, patting Shadowfax.
"I am NOT riding with TC and Pippin!" Legolas demanded firmly.
"I'm not riding with MC and Merry!" Aragorn decided as well. "And I don't think it would be wise to let MC and Merry, or TC and Pippin, ride together."
"Yes." Gandalf agreed. "And it would be to cruel to make one person deal with both TC and MC." The mentioned hobbits looked indignant.
"I'll take MC and Pippin!" Legolas quickly volunteered, knowning that MC was easier to tolerate than TC (though, not by much).
"I don't want TC!" Aragorn yelled.
"What? Like I really wanna ride with you?" TC retorted.
"You can ride with Gandalf."
"No!" Gandalf yelled firmly. "I'm riding with the dwarf." TC sat on the nearby boulder and looked down sadly. Aragorn didn't seem to have a choice. Legolas was loaded and Gandalf refused.
"Fine..." he surrendered.
"I don't wanna ride with Merry!" TC screamed from behind Aragorn. "I wanna ride with PIPPIN!"
"Yes, TC, you have made that clear!" Aragorn said through clenched teeth. TC and Merry had been complaining the whole time, and he was trying as hard as he possibly could to keep his temper under control.
"And I REALLY don't wanna ride with TC!" Merry yelled, in front of Aragorn. "I REALLY wanna ride with MC!"
Legolas was having similar problems.
"I REFUSE TO RIDE ANY FURTHER WITH MC!" Pippin yelled stubbornly.
"You don't have a choice!" Legolas told him, trying to ignore that the hobbit had just elbowed him (hard) in the stomach. "But I wouldn't care if you jumped off the horse!"
"I WANT TO RIDE WITH MERRY!" MC screamed commandingly, causing Legolas to jump (partly because of the noise, partly because he still wasn't used to the fact that MC LIKED Merry).
Suddenly, TC flew off the horse. Well, actually, she was thrown off the horse. Aragorn was looking quite pleased with himself. Legolas and Gandalf halted their mounts, so Aragorn had to as well.
"I cannot ride with those two any longer!"
"We might as well just humor them." Legolas suggested. "But I am still NOT riding with TC and Pippin!" Legolas recalled the trouble that TC tended to cause.
"That's fine, because I'm not riding with MC and Merry!" Aragorn replied. The hobbits switched horses, except TC, who remained standing on the ground, her arms crossed. "TC, get over here!"
"No! Not until you apologise!"
"NOW!"
"NO!"
Aragorn jumped off his horse, walked over to TC and dragged her over to the horse and mounted up. By now, MC, Pippin, and Merry had discovered why TC complained so much--it was fun! Their complaints did not cease.
"I don't wanna sit in back!" MC whined (though she really couldn't care less). "I feel like I'm gonna fall off!"
"So hold on!" Legolas said in annoyance.
"I don't wanna hold on to YOU!"
"So shut up!"
"Don't wanna do that either!"
"Too bad!"
Aragorn was not faring any better.
"Your sword is touching my leg!" TC complained. "And it's not cool!"
"Would you rather I got rid of my sword?"
"Yes, I actually would feel more comfortable if you did..."
"Well I'm not going to! So deal with it!"
"Aragorn..."
"WHAT PIPPIN?!"
"The saddle horn is rubbing my balls!"
"I DON'T CARE!"
"ARAGORN!"
"TC YOU DON'T HAVE TO YELL!" Aragorn yelled, not realizing his irony.
"We're too close to the other horse! Legolas's foot is touching mine!"
Aragorn moved the horse over to the right.
"Now Gandalf's staff is touching my foot. Or maybe that's Gimli's axe..."
"TC!" Aragorn screamed, causing everyone to jump, "SHUT UP!" TC blinked a couple times, as if that was a concept she hadn't grasped yet.
"LEGOLAS!" MC shouted.
"WHAT?!" The elf cried, his nerves were wearing very thin.
"I can't see Merry."
"And I can't see MC!" Merry added.
"Your quiver is right in my face!"
"SO SCOOT BACK!" Everyone stared in surprise at the Elf's (second) outburst.
"I'll fall off!"
"I know!"
"I'm bored." MC said, several hours later.
"Me too," TC agreed. Merry and Pippin stated that they too were bored. Legolas and Aragorn became frightened, knowing no good could come out of this situation.
"Let's swordfight!" MC suggested.
"On horseback?" TC asked, doubtful.
"Sure, why not?"
They drew their swords and began fighting the best they could (which was not easy on horseback, when the horse is galloping, and you're on the horse's rear). TC soon won, because MC lost grip on her sword, and it fell to the ground.
"Legolas!" she screamed. "Stop the horse! I need to get my sword." TC quickly sheathed hers.
Legolas halted his horse (as did Aragorn and Gandalf), so MC could grab her sword. They confisgated the hobbits' swords.
For Aragorn, Legolas, Gandalf, and Gimli, the trip to Edoras took twice as long as it should have. The hobbits' complaining continued the WHOLE way there. As soon as they were inside the city, the hobbits were evacuated from the horses.
"GET AWAY!" Aragorn screamed, a pure sight of insanity at that moment.
"AR-A-GORN! THEY. WILL. NOT. HURT. YOU!" Legolas spoke slowly, separating every syllable.
"Yes they will."