The Greatest Show Ever 2
A/N: I got some reviews! Yay! And you guys didn't hate it! (starts singing) It's a very very mad world…
About the whole Brian/Justin blah blah it wasn't their blah blah. It was a general blah blah (I have to stop saying blah blah :). I absolutely love them and Gale's one of the hottest guys on TV (and I should probable stop before I'll make any NC-17 comment ;)
So I guess there's only one thing to add – THANK YOU ALL!
Disclaimer: Don't own GG… but… I own Milo! Yes I do! Alexis lets me play with him once in a while! Hmm… sounds dirrrrrrrrty!
Chapter 2 (warning: it gets cheesy…) R&R! pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease… (no I'm not pathetic ;))
(Opening. Our narrator is sitting in the same armchair…wearing a veeeeeeeery colorful Hawaiian shirt.)
Narrator: Aloha! Just got from a vacation… I must admit that this stupid job pays pretty well! (looks around) and it's taxes free… Anyway hello to all of you and welcome to the next episode of the Literati Story. Behind the scenes. Such a cool title… I'm a real genius! And tonight we will not only receive our direct witnesses but a certain lovely couple as well!
Rory is beaming. Jess half smiles.
Narrator: No, not you dears… I meant Lorelai and Luke!
Lorelai (very excitedly): Yay! It's us! Luke, it's all about us!
Luke: ……………
Narrator: Sorry Lorelai… it's still all about your daughter. But who knows maybe one day…
Lorelai: It's because Luke isn't a hoodlum wrecking people's cars and insulting every living creature isn't it?
Jess (angrily): Hey! Haven't done that for years! And it's because we're much more interesting than some coffee addict with a verbal incontinence and her flannel puppy dog!
Luke: You better watch what you're saying! I'm not her puppy dog!
Lorelai (to Luke): But you think he's right about coffee… and other of my qualities? You can forget about your Deanna Troi fantasy mister!
Rory: Gross mom! I really didn't need to know that!
Narrator: Me neither actually… And I'm sorry to interrupt this lovely family discussion you four were having but our first guest just arrived, so let's give it a warm welcome! (claps hands madly)
Luke (annoyed): Geez, is he like this all the time?
Lorelai (sighs happily): I like him!
Narrator (to Lorelai): Sorry it's just an act… They pay me more when I get all happy and weird… I'm pretty sad in real life… Actually I'm a very sad man. You see I've never known love like you guys have. My wife left me for my half brother and it was just after I got fired from my job and right before I lost my apartment but it wasn't that bad not like the time I got…
Luke: Jess you have my permission to shut him up!
Jess (sarcastically): Oh no Uncle Luke! I think we'll get an It's a wonderful life speech at the end!
Narrator: Don't need your pity anyway! I'll just go home! See if you can do my job better than me! (gets up and leaves).
Lorelai: This is so cool! Can I take his place? Oh oh! Maybe I should wear a crown or something?
Luke (sighs): The first guest please… (no one shows) I said THE FIRST GUEST!
The first guest appears: I'm here… please don't shout anymore… I'm very delicate…
Lorelai (excitedly): Oh! I know you! Rory look!
The first guest: Of course you know me! I'm your daughter's winter coat! You bought me! (The girls wave. The guys just look annoyed.)
Tonight I'm here to tell you a little story of an increasing attraction… and a sleigh.
Lorelai and Rory (singing): Dashing through the snow in a one horse open sleigh…
Winter Coat (continues humming): lalalalala… (reflects suddenly) I've been with you girls for too long… Oh well… It's my story time! It was a cold winter night…
Jess (interrupting): Do you guys always have to start with the weather report? (mockingly) It was a warm autumn evening; it was a cold winter night…
Rory: I kinda agree with Jess on that. It's repetitive… (to Lorelai who looks like she wants to say something) and don't start with the redundant mom!
Lorelai (pounting): You're taking his side… (in a Emily like voice) Shame on you young lady! You actually agree with Mr. No-Hairbrush…
Jess (indulgently): Come on Lorelai! Even Emily would find a better name than that!
Lorelai: Oh my God! He's right! I have to agree with him! Rory!
Rory: The world is coming to an end…
Winter Coat (shyly): Can I continue? (silent agreement) So it was a cold… Ok the weather bit is out… I was with Rory of course and we were nicely wrapped in a warm blanket, happily anticipating the sleigh ride that Lorelai prepared before the Bracebridge Dinner. It was softly snowing, the Christmas lights were to be seen everywhere and everything was so quiet you could almost touch the silence…
Jess (sarcastically): How poetic!
Rory: Stop it! He's getting to the best part!
Jess: Really? Which one was it? The wonderful smell of the horses or the cold that freezed my…
Rory (adds quickly): The part when you jumped in!
Everyone's looking at Jess waiting for his reaction.
Jess (softly): Oh… That's… You know… (silence)
Lorelai (chipping in): Nice? Adorable? Sweet? Romantic? Lovely?
Luke (warningly): Lorelai…
Jess (looking intensely at Rory): Yeah… I mean continue…
Winter Coat: The part when he just jumped in… Rory was quite surprised I must say, but surprised in a good way… (anticipating Jess' reaction) even if she played resentful and angry. The ride was amazing! The way they talked about everything and nothing! (beat) OK so they mostly talked about Dean but still they shared a moment. You know a moment… And of course the whole Bjork and snowmen contest thing! (to Jess) That was a winner topic for a conversation with Rory! And we all know the result of this innocent little talk (winks to Jess).
Luke: Why I'm not surprised it was you…
Lorelai: Ha! I knew it! I knew it was you who destroyed the snowman!
Rory (amused): Really mom? Because if I remember well, you suspected absolutely everybody! You even thought that it was a result of your sleepwalking criminal tendencies…
Lorelai: It was a coffee-free dinner theory! My brain wasn't functioning!
Winter Coat (trying to ignore the whole discussion): What a smart move it was, Jess! You let her see that not only you two had literature in common but also good music!
Jess (shrugs): It's not like I planned it.
Winter Coat: Then I guess we can all admit that you two had an incredible connection. You talked with each other like if you were lifetime best friends… (getting dreamy) Best friends and soul mates… Forever linked…
The girls (seriously) and Luke (mockingly): Awwwwwwww…
Jess shrugs again.
Winter Coat (tearfully): I'm sorry… I'm very sensitive. (leaves crying)
Rory: Mom, since you wanted the narrator part, you should end tonight's show.
Luke: Oh God yes, I really have better things to do than this crap…
Lorelai (looking at narrator's flashcards): But it says we have another guest.
Luke (taking the flashcard from Lorelai): Oh great… (muttering) A pair of gloves… (suddenly loudly) MIA?
Jess: They must be mine. I lost them somewhere in California.
Luke: What would you do with a pair of winter gloves in California? You know what… I don't want to know… (to everybody) Let's go.
They leave.
Few minutes later Lorelai reappears.
Lorelai (in a very bad British accent): Thank you, Ladies and Gentlemen, for your attention!
Luke and Rory (shouting off screen): Lorelai/Mom!
Lorelai leaves.
A/N: I added L/L sooner than I thought I would. Mainly because they're the only reason I'm still watching the show… and because I still regret that this fabulous four didn't have any cool scenes together…