This is a fanfiction based in JKR's world of Harry Potter. Original characters are mine. All others are hers. Please see the first chapter for full disclaimers and detailed thanks to my awesome betas. I've had a lot of help with this story!
Chapter 2: Childhood Memories
The Lupin family immediately moved to the countryside. Becky's Muggle parents were dairy farmers and cheerfully allowed their daughter's family to build a second house on the property in which to live. Jonathan kept his practice at St. Mungo's and simply Apparated to work. Rebecca resumed her teaching duties, this time as private instructor of her own two children. Remus doted on Rowena from the instant he woke and saw her. He didn't recall much of what had happened to him that fateful night, aside from the grief he'd felt over the Kneazles.
On the farm, John and Becky kept the children isolated. Loving grandparents close at hand aided in keeping them happy and entertained so they scarcely noticed the absence of other children. They were each other's best and only friends. They traipsed through streams and ponds, up trees—though Remus always had to climb up and get Rowena down, as she was afraid of heights—and generally explored the wide world together.
They bore a strong resemblance to each other. In colouring, they were a monotony of light, mousy-brown. Rowena often joked that they had both been dipped in the same barrel of honey-brown paint before birth and let it go at that, the "Powers That Be" being otherwise too busy to make their colouring more interesting or unique. Eyes, hair, even the lightly tanned, olive complexion added to the uniformity. Their facial features were strikingly similar, though hers were a more feminine, delicate casting of his.
They were, in short, as their grandmother often teased, "As close as two peas in a pod."
On nights of the full moon, Rowena was led to believe that it was Remus' 'turn' to have a sleep-over at their grandparents' house. John would take Remus to a specially prepared cellar under the barn. He would give Remus a potion of the strongest painkiller he could safely use and place chickens inside with him, so his son would have something to vent his killing lust upon when in his wolf form. At dawn, Becky would retrieve him, bathe him, and tend to any wounds he had inflicted upon himself during the night. He would be in the house as normal by the time Rowena was awake.
Rowena, for her part, idolised her older brother. He read to her. He brushed and braided her hair. He tended her scrapes when they were out playing in the fields. He studied with her, delighting in her thirst for knowledge and learning which quickly matched his, causing their parents to jokingly complain that there would be nothing left for them to learn when it came time to go to school.
School. Hogwarts. Would that be possible for Remus?
In June of the year Remus turned 11 years old, Albus Dumbledore himself came to the family home. This was not a matter that could be discussed via owls. The children were out playing, so the adults were free to talk openly.
The Lupin parents were grateful to the point of tears at the extreme measures the Headmaster had already taken to provide for Remus and accommodate his condition. They were especially relieved to find that somehow, while the Headmaster knew of Remus' lycanthropy, no one else did. At Hogwarts, he would be safe. And he could go to school.
And so, on September 1st, Remus boarded the Hogwarts Express to begin his adventure, leaving home and family for the first time. He was shy and uncertain around so many other children. But his intelligence and love of learning helped make the schoolwork itself no difficult thing, and his innate friendly nature enabled him to make friends easily.
If he had a serious character flaw, it was his desire to be liked by as many people as possible. He disliked confrontations of all sorts, and especially couldn't handle the occasional heated disagreements that arose between friends. He would always demur to the other, rather than fight or argue. This weakness, even in light of all of his other amiable characteristics, would one day cost him dearly.
Another boy arrived at Hogwarts on September 1st. This boy was pale and almost skeletally thin. Lank black hair hung lifelessly about his face. His bottomless black eyes revealed nothing, but hid suffering and pain beyond imagining.
His mother had survived and protected him as long as she could. Numerous times he had healed her himself, back from the brink of death when his father's rages had passed and he had left the house. Numerous times she had done the same for him.
Never again. Yesterday, Devin had beaten her to death and made Severus watch, not allowing him to heal her or even go to her until she had breathed her last. He then told his "worthless idiot" son to get out and never return. If not for his mother's planning all of those years, Severus would have been at a loss for what to do.
As it was, though grief and rage consumed him, he left the house at once. He had money enough in Gringotts, again thanks to his mother, to get him through Hogwarts with no external financial support. He would have to make arrangements for summer lodgings, somehow, but he would get by.
Alone in all the world and consumed with unspent grief and an all-encompassing desire for vengeance, this boy boarded the train. The blackness filling his heart spilled out of him like a palpable thing, so that all avoided him.
Rowena was desperately lonely. Her parents still wished to keep her isolated and safe; their own fears caused by what had happened to Remus led them to judge poorly in what was best for their daughter.
Rowena was still blissfully unaware of Remus's condition. She knew only that he had been badly injured by an animal attack the day she was born, which caused her parents to be so anxious and protective.
The weekly owls from her brother, and the school holidays with Remus, became the only bright spots of her existence. Her parents loved her and she them, but she was bored and lonesome. Without Remus to accompany her, they wouldn't let her wander so far from the house. Without Remus to talk to, she had no one to share and discuss her ideas with.
Her parents dealt with this boredom by encouraging her to read whatever caught her interest. With only one child at home, Becky was able to focus more intently on her daughter's education. Rowena read voraciously, delving into Muggle literature and eventually even began dabbling into Muggle sciences of maths, chemistry, and physics—with a great deal of parental assistance.
At the start of each new school year, their parents bought two sets of texts—one for Remus to take to school and one for Rowena at home. It wasn't strictly permitted for them to allow her access to such books, but it was the only thing that soothed her loneliness. She felt in some way that she was still able to share in Remus' experience by reading the books he was using. It was her only comfort, so they indulged her.
At last, her own letter came. Hogwarts! She was packed and ready weeks before the departure date. Remus had told her such tales! Kids and clubs and the Great Hall and feasts. Ghosts and the poltergeist. Remus' great friends… James Potter, Sirius Black, and Peter Pettigrew. She wanted to see it all!
She would get to be there with Remus! He would help her, show her around and introduce her so she wouldn't be frightened. She had it all planned in her mind as to how it would be.
Honour and duty are hard things to bear. They are hard things to understand. And sometimes they are hard things by which to guide one's life.
Remus had grown to understand his condition. He had learned what it meant in the wizarding world to be a werewolf. He felt honour-bound to protect his sister from any possible taint by association. If it were discovered that he was a werewolf, he did not want his condition to affect Rowena's future.
On the night before they were to leave together on the train, Remus came to Rowena's room. He could hardly bear to look into her bright, shining, trusting face and tell her what he knew he had to say.
He sat on the edge of her bed beside her and began to brush her hair. This was a tender ritual he had started when she was very young—because their mother had gotten tired of hearing her squall when she brushed the snarls out of it. For whatever reason, Rowena sat much quieter when Remus did it. He felt certain this would be his last opportunity to do so. She would never forgive him for the pain he was about to inflict.
"Rowena... I have something very important to tell you. I can't explain it fully now…. You might not ever understand completely. I just hope you'll believe that I'm doing this because I love you, and it's in your best interest. You are my baby sister. There will never be a dearer person to me in my life."
His voice cracked at this, and he stopped his brushing to hug her tightly. Her face paled and she turned to look at him, her large doe-eyes filled with anxiety as they scanned her brother's face.
"Remus, what is it?" she asked. "You're scaring me... I love you, too. We're going to have a great time at Hogwarts! I can't wait to meet James and Sirius, and even shy little Peter—they sound so fun! What's got you so upset?"
His eyes were over-bright as he bent to kiss her forehead.
"Rowena, when you come to Hogwarts, I don't want anyone to know you're my sister," he said very gravely. "I haven't told anyone about you in all this time."
She looked at him as though he had slapped her, her face paling even further, and her large brown eyes widening in angry surprise.
"What do you mean, you don't want anyone to know? Hello, Remus, we're both Lupins, remember?" Her voice clearly betrayed her shocked disbelief.
Remus cringed and tried to hold her hand, but she pulled it away angrily. He sighed, "'Wena, there are lots of kids there with the same last names who aren't siblings. I'll be telling everyone you are a distant cousin and we've never actually met before. I want you to do the same. I can't explain why, 'Wena. Please just trust that I am doing this for your own good."
Rowena stood up and shoved him hard, causing him to fall off the edge of the bed onto the floor. Her face was twisted with anger. He was rejecting her just when she was so looking forward to his protection and guidance as she entered the strange new world of Hogwarts. He was abandoning her when she needed him most! She couldn't understand anything but her own angry pain.
"Get out," she hissed, angrily. "You're ashamed of me and don't want anyone to know I'm your sister? Fine! Let's start now! From this moment, you're not my brother. Get out!"
He wanted to explain. He wanted to apologise. He wanted to change his mind and just take the risk. But he couldn't be selfish and risk damaging her reputation if the truth was discovered. And so, even though his heart felt as though it was being ripped to shreds within him, he nodded, got back to his feet and walked out of the room. She slammed the door behind him.
He could hear her harsh, angry sobs long into the night. Each bitter sound was like a fresh knife to his own pain.