DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fiction. I am in no way getting financial gain from the publication of this story. Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic and some characters from Knights of the Old Republic are copyright to Lucas Arts, Bio-ware and Obsidian.
Chpater 4
"It has been approximately two weeks and I have been watching Padawan Alora closely. Her thoughts are that of Revan. Not in a way of iniquity, but in the way of accepting on who she was. She often lays awake at night, fearing to go to sleep for she has been receiving nightmares of her past. The decisions she made when she was Revan. She has come to the point of being terrified. She fears to sleep, fearing she would be "cursed" with another vision, nightmare of the evil she spread across the galaxy while she was the Dark Lord of the Sith. The amount of regret she carries with her in both heart and mind are incredible. The way she walks, it is as if she has a weight that will never be removed. Her shoulders seemed to be always slumped forward in defeat. Her face is no longer full of life. Instead they are dead, empty, and almost expressionless. These are only a few of the emotions I sensed in her feelings when I questioned her mutable times during my last visit." Master Kavar paused for a moment, trying to regain his breath a little and to study the expression of the other Jedi Master's present during this meeting. Finally Master Kavar regained himself and began to speak again. "Who knows how much more she is suffering inside? Revan always had a gift to contain her true feelings, along with the gift to manipulate her proper feelings and use the right words to make others believe what is false. I feel she is only telling me a fraction of the pain she is feeling. I fear for her, if there is no way we can help her, if there is no way to ease her mind, she could become into a state of great depression. True, her mediation is strong and her emotions are the same as when we last discussed her progress, but I find that she is becoming more and more terrified about her past then before. The recent dream she shared with me proves my point. The dream she dreamed was the day she removed Malak's Jaw. This is only one of the many visions and dreams she has seen. How many more before she tries to hurt herself. How many more visions before she is tempted to return to her old ways. I feel we must do something to help her, to ease her mind, to assist her in any way possible…"
As Master Kavar was speaking Master Vrook interrupted and replied "But there is another matter in which we also should discuss. For once again, Revan still seems to think about Carth Onasi, the honorable Republic solider. Perhaps we should confer our concern to Padawan Alora concerning her love for Carth Onasi. If we continue to allow her to love this man, I fear she could return to the dark side. For as you know the Jedi Council has always taught against love. For love can lead to the dark side."
Finally it was Master Vandar's turn to speak. "I believe that recent events of Padawan Alora's dreams should be discussed in more detail. True her love for Carth Onasi could be dangerous, but I feel the dreams and visions she has been receiving are of more importance then her love for Carth Onasi." Turning his head towards Mastar Kavar he said "Please continue Master Kavar, tell the Jedi Council in full detail of this vision that Padawan Alora received only a few days ago. Perhaps we could be more of a help to her if we knew more what is troubling the Revan."
Master Kavar nodded and retold the story of how Malak lost his Jaw in full detail. Master Kavar made sure he told the story to the Jedi Council exactly the way Alora had revealed the dream to him. Finally when he finished he said "you see, this is only a hint of the nightmares she has received, who knows what other dreams or visions she might yet receive." Master Kavar then paused, trying to find the right words. "I know this has already been said, but I feel this cannot be stretched out enough, I feel if we do not help Revan in facing her nightmares, or helping her in anyway we can, I feel Revan will become unstable, in more the one way." Pausing once again, to make sure his main point got across. Seeing that the Council had taken heed of his warning he continued speaking "Of course, we will also discuses our concern to her about her love for Carth Onasi as well, but I fear that her love will be a minor concern if we do not try to ease her troubled mind, or-or at least do something to help her."
Master Vandar spoke again and said "Both of you make good points. We shall send Master Kavar to discuss our concern with her. Since she seems to trust and know Master Kavar on a more personal note, I feel she would accept the concern we have for her better with someone she knows and respects. Also we should explain our concern to Revan not just on our concern about her recent events of dreams and visions, but also our concern, and reminder about the Jedi Order's view on love."
As Vandar was finishing his words an elder, yet stern voice interrupted the conversation and replied "That wouldn't be a wise thing to do." Stepping out of the shadows was Jolee Bindo. He had been listening to the whole conversation, well, almost all of it.
Slightly surprised Master Vandar spoke up and said in a calm and simple voice, "Jolee Bindo." Master Vandar knew of his presence before Jolee showed himself for Master Vander could sense the force still flowing through Jolee. Though he figured Jolee would not interrupt on their conversation concerning Padawan Alora. Speaking up again Master Vandar spoke to Jolee "You wish to talk to us about something Jolee Bindo? Why is it that talking to Padawan Alora concerning her romance with Carth Onasi would be unwise?" Master Vandar asked in a questing and slightly curious voice.
"You are asking me? A man who is no longer a Jedi? Fine, I'll delight you in telling you why it is unwise. Do you want to know Why Revan was able to resist the calling of the dark side? Do you want to know why she stayed strong throughout the battle on the Star Forge? It is because of Carth Onasi. While she confronted Bastlia on the top of the Rakatan temple and Bastlia was offering her the chance to re-birth the Dark Lord Revan….
"Come Revan, come and take your place as the TRUE dark lord of the sith, not Malak. You are stronger then Malak, your old apprentice is weak, foolish. But you already know this. Give into the hunger, the hate that you feel inside. You cannot deny the abhorrence you feel forever. Give into it, let it power you, let it make you stronger then you are now. You should hold the title Dark Lord of the Sith. Join me, and we can overturn Malak and I will be your apprentice instead of being Malak's Apprentice. I can feel the hate inside you Revan. You may deny it all you want Revan, but you will always have that so called dark "taint" inside you. Feed the taint Revan, do like I did Revan. No matter what you think we are always linked, I know the thoughts you are thinking, I was offered the chance of freedom from the Jedi council, to no longer be bound be codes of honor, by codes of light. The dark side is that of freedom. I have YOUR dark taint inside of me now Revan. If you join us, you can become even stronger then when you were once the Dark Lord."
As Revan listened to Bastlia's she struggled to control her emotions. The rage she felt inside, it was calling to her. It was like a whisper, off in the distance growing louder, whispering this temptation in her ear "Come. You can not resist your lust for power. Take your rightful place. Become free, become alive again."
Revan was fighting herself; she wanted to go into the position as if she was affected by the force power insanity. To hold her head with her hands and to scream, "NO! NO I won't do it!" While she was being tempted by both Bastlia and herself, there was the whisper of the light that she had worked so hard to become. "No, don't do it Alora. Think of the ones you would hurt, the ones you would murder…Think of Carth." The words "Carth" seemed to punch Alora in the stomach. Wanting to break down and fall on her knees and just cry "Carth" over and over again. But when Revan heard the voices of Bastalia, Juhani, it brought her back to reality. Finding a sudden strength to resist the temptation, the calling of the Dark Side, Revan stared at Bastlia with determination, her shoulders back and standing tall. "No, I won't do it. I don't want to fight you Bastlia but you leave me no choice!" Finally Alora activated the lightsaber in both her hands. One was the color of Cyan, while the other was a perfect, medium blue, though it was shorter then the Cyan one. And so, the two fought, but it ended in a stale mate for Bastlia retreated, retreated to the Stare Forge.
As Alora chased Bastlia, she stoped in the hall she knew she would have to confront Bastlia again. Revan watched as Bastlia flew away. Feeling almost defeated, depressed Alroa stood there, her eyes full of disbelief. The one woman who she had gained great friendship with, the one she trusted had been corrupted! Finally realizing her lightsabers were still activated she switched them of and continued to let her thought run away from the here and now. However, when she felt the firm gripe of Jolee's hand upon her shoulder she snapped back into reality and said "Come-on! We have to disable the disrupter field and get to the Star Forge!"
"As I watched Alora I could see her struggling within her self. I could also sense through the force that she was struggling, struggling on what to do. She was almost at a loss. The Revan that was left in her was calling out to her. Though the Alora we know now, the Alora that strives to be honorable, to be caring and kind. These two sides were fighting inside her. But I know what it was that kept her from re-tracing her foot steps. Her thoughts went back to the crew on the Ebon Hawk. She had grown to respect them and trust them with her life. Also, she thought of Carth Onasi. She had loved this man for a long time, but in secret. If she didn't have him or the friends she had formed over the mission she would have fallen once again. So you see it isn't the love we must fear, it is the passion of love that we must teach to be wary of."