A/N: Hey there, everybody! I'm back and here with a new chapter. Thank you to all of my readers, and an even bigger thank you to those who took the time to review, they really mean a lot to me.
Also, I've gone through the first chapter and fixed up all the spelling and grammar errors I could find.
Disclaimer: GetBackers and all related characters to the anime and/or the manga do not belong to me but oh how I wish they did.
Pairing: Ban x Ginji
Warning: THIS FIC CONTAINS YAOI! If you don't like that sorta thing, turn your little caboose around cuz this ain't for you! Uhm… ya, yaoi is pretty much the gist of it, besides grammar issues, and joined wordslikethis, of which I apologize greatly for. I'm sure most of you have noticed that little problem, too. I'm doing what I can. Well, my loves, Enjoy!
Thank you to:
Topaz: It's true. As awesome as the pairing is, there is never near enough to read. You say you are lazy, as most of us here are, but I cannot thank you ENOUGH my thanks to you for taking the time to tell me what you think. I'm flattered you think I'm talented, and I hope to make this story worth your time.
Poochiini: Awww, thanks! (flutters) The whole BanGinjiAkabane thing always interested me, and I really wanted to do something with it. I'm actually a little bit surprised to find that there isn't more of it. I'm super glad you think the characters are on target, because that's one of my main things. I hope you enjoy the rest of the story, I'll do my best!
kerosuke jin: The makings of a good fic, you say. Glad you think so, love! All I want to do is torture the poor boys for all the wonderful BanGinji fans out there because there is just not enough BxG goodness to fill out cravings. (faces the world) Am I RIGHT? Yeah! Power!
Tastywheat: I ALWAYS pay really close attention to characters and their relations to other people. The interaction between Ban, Ginji and Akabane is fascinating, and was just begging at me to write about it. And yeah, Ginji is anything but stupid, just childlike, and I think a lot of people mistake that. I'm sorry there was not as much dialog as you would have liked, but I'm afraid that is just my writing style. I still hope you'll enjoy, however, I sure hope to see you reviewing again!
Lauria: Ahh, relation dynamics, one of my ULTIMATE favorite areas of a story. Trust me (looks at other reviews) your not the only one noticing the serious lack of BanGinji fics around here, though there are a lot of goods ones if you look hard enough. I'm glad to be able to give you some good BxG to read, and I hope to keep your thirst satisfied.
Lady Geuna: Well, Akabane is always hard to see through, and its only natural to assume he's got something up his sleeve. But it looks like you are a BanGinji nut like myself, so hopefully you should be greatly satisfied with the story. Cuz how can you NOT love Ban kicking ass for the sake of a certain someone else?
jess: Hhehe, I continued, happy? Glad you think it is good, if we're lucky, it'll stay good. I hope you'll keep reading, and keep reviewing. They mean the world to me.
Ushionlooker: Awww, thanks. I always like to go from first person POV only because it feels more like you are discovering things along with the character. Not all of the chapters are in Ban's POV, but this one is, so enjoy! A talented writer? Me? Thank you so much! And thanks for the fav.
bffimagine: Would YOU be able to sleep? Knowing that some creep is talking about your partner like that? Haha, I hope to keep you reading and enjoying this fic as much as I am writing it.
Alex: You think my writing is awesome? How sweet! And don't worry, I have no intention of leaving this fic in the dust when there are people that seem to really like it. I'm sorry I don't update very fast, but I'm glad to hear you keep checking up on this fic. The fic and I hug you.
Setsu: I try really really hard to keep all of my chapters around the same length and quality. Sometimes it doesn't work out but it should be enough to satisfy you. Or at least I hope it does. I only do it cuz I know how I can read a story and then mope til the next chapter cuz the chapter was so short.
Picasso: Having people in character is one of my big things. I do what I can to make sure everyone is how they are supposed to be, and I'm glad to hear that I haven't stunk it up yet.
Seraluna: haha, wow, thanks hun. If you are having that much fun with this fic then I guess I have no choice but to continue, eh? I am very happy to hear that you find my writing style easy to read, and I hope to keep you satisfied.
Lady Lemonade: Goodness? Ah, one little world fills my heart with joy, lol. I hope you keep reading.
signourney: It's nice to know that people are not having too hard of a time following along with my style. And it seems I have yet another eager reader. I updated a little slow, but hopefully it'll be worth it.
WOW! Dunno if you all think 15 is a large number for one chapter or not, but I never expected to get that many reviews for one chapter. Thank you all for your comments and remember to review again for this chapter. I am always open for comments and tips to make my writing better. Hugs!
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The Rain Keeps Falling
A fiction by Crimson Vixen
Chapter Two – Oblivious Aftertaste
Ban's POV
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For the third time in about… five minutes, the obnoxious squeaking of a bathroom towel rack sounded throughout the small but cozy hotel room. It was a cheap place; you could tell by the paint that was pealing off of the walls, and the stains that littered the carpet, but it was something affordable, and it had a bed and bathroom so there was really nothing to complain about. And that's where Ginji was right now; in the bathroom, probably exploring and indulging himself on the pleasures such a simple room could bring, just like he did every time wegot a room.
Glancing over to the tiny bathroom where the light was on, all I could see was Ginji's shadow on the far baby blue wall. His silhouette was leaning over the sink, arm reaching out to twist one of the two knobs that were there. The sound of running water went on for some time, constantly hissing, and I was thankful when it finally ceased and silence followed. But that silence was broken when the sound of running water came back for another minute, and stopped again. Rolling my eyes fondly, something I did only because no one was there to witness it, I muttered loud enough for my partner to hear.
"Just how fascinated are by running water?"
A few more seconds of silence. A light, soft, airy chuckle after that.
"Sorry. It's just not something you get when in your precious ladybug."
His boyish, yet matured voice was something I found very attractive then, especially when it was tainted with such light humor. Though at a young age he was forced to take on enormous responsibility, he had kept that untainted youth. I'm actually pretty impressed.
The bathroom light died and Ginji's shadow disappeared along with it. He walked out, oversized green vest slung lazily over his broad shoulder, and he spread his arms wide before collapsing onto his bed with a heavy sigh. While prone, his head shifted to stare at his pillow, and he frowned when he remembered no mint lay there waiting for him.
I guess somehow the owners of this piece-of-shit building figured that by placing a mint on the pillow, they were gain a few more notches on the respect scale.
When we had first set foot in here, he had headed straight for the mint on the bed that he had automatically claimed to be 'his' because it was closer to the window, and gobbled it down happily. It never took much to please him, but now he was staring at me with pleading chocolate brown eyes, eyes that were too piercing and wide to lose anyone's attention, and I prepared myself for the inevitable.
You see, I've yet to eat my own mint and was actually in the process of unwrapping it when he looked my way. He rolled off the bed, disappeared for a moment when the bed blocked him from my view, until his head poked up and he was at my bedside and on his knees, elbows resting on my covers and arms crossing sluggishly, plotting.
"Ban-chan…"
Here it comes…
"Ban-chan, are you gonna eat that?"
I eyed him, and then the mint, pretending to actually ponder his inquiry. His gaze followed my own, a childlike sparkle starting to crawl into his awaiting irises.
"Well… Originally, that was why I unwrapped it."
Shrug. Smirk.
"Oh please, Ban-chan? Can I have it, please? I'll make it up to you, I promise."
It never ceases to amaze me how someone with an alter ego such as The Lightning Emperor, a reputation that sent people running, someone so feared and so powerful, would get on their knees and beg with no regard for his own pride and dignity… all for a single bite-sized piece of chocolate minty goodness. Still, I don't think he knew just how much that trembling chin and lower lip killed me.
"I'll remember this," I warned as I tossed the damn thing to him, the gleam in his eyes was priceless as his hand predictably snatched it out of the air and threw it into his waiting mouth. He gave a satisfied audible here and there to express how good he thought it was and when he swallowed, he grinned, shooting me a thumbs up before scrambling to his bed.
With the highlight of my day over, I stretched, ready for some sleep. I was about set to suggest turning off the lights when something stopped me. My hand stopped just short of the light switch, and stayed there as I took a breath.
"Ginji…"
His head turned sharply and swiftly, as if I had frightened him. He sat in a loose indian style, ankles lazily crossing over one another, hugging his pillow, gaze waiting and looking as though I was about to tell him a big secret.
"What do you think about… Akabane?"
He visibly stiffened at the name. It was a stupid question, really. I knew how he felt. How could anyone not? His head lowered, gazing down at the soft object in his hands.
"Akabane…? He scares me. I don't understand his logic." His fingers dug themselves into the pillow, wavering as his brows lowered at the thought. His expression temporarily unchanging, his shoulders tersely quavered as he forced out a chuckle, like he thought what he was saying was a stupid joke to be embarrassed of. His voice was noticeably lower now, lessened to just above a whisper as his face visibly ran through his feelings. The sound of it reminded me of the voice of Ratei, but this was Ginji. And Ginji's voice never got like that unless his mind was strongly enough burdened by something. "I like to think that there's good in everybody. But when I'm around Akabane, I… all I can find is overwhelming fear. I can't find anything good about the guy."
Apprehension was something that didn't suit Ginji well, though it happened all the time. It was because he was a worrywart, to put it in the nicely. Any risk to his friends made his emotions go haywire, and he would even carry me to the nearest doctor if I so much as sniffled more than once. The guy just… didn't think about himself enough, and that worried me. It meant I had to agonize for the both of us.
The main lights were off, unlike the soft light from the counter next to him that was gently dancing on his cheeks and nose, outlining his features and slumped shape. His eyes narrowed a little, casting darker shadows under them, making them near impossible to see. Only the small glint in his eyes from the dim lamp showed that they were still open. He gnawed at his lower lip as he gulped loudly, turning his head to me, expression still mildly grim, but eyes still as pure and pleading as ever. The fingers that were puncturing his cotton pillow let loose, then tightened again with deadly force, but he didn't seem to notice.
"Why do you wanna know?"
It was my turn to grip at something, and the sheets were the closest thing within reach so I took a firm hold of them, hands cramping with the force. It was easy to see I had set Ginji to uneasy mode, something I never liked to do, and telling him that Akabane may be giving us a hard time soon would only burden his sleep further. My teeth began grinding for the second time that day behind closed lips.
"No reason," I tried assuring him, as well as myself. "Just wondering why you left me alone with the guy."
It was meant to ease the tension, but Ginji's face fell, enough so to see it in the dark, and instead of gripping harder into the pillow, he pulled it to his chest and embraced it for what I can only presume to be for security reasons.
"I'm sorry, Ban-chan."
Great. Now instead of giving him a heads up, I only caused him to worry for my safety, AND feel guilty about running off earlier that day.
"Idiot, go to sleep."
That was my escape. It seemed like everything I said was only making more problems for Ginji. And I didn't want to see that gloomy face; guilt and sadness and Ginji did not go well together.
My hand reached out to turn out the light on my side, and Ginji did the same for his side. The room turned pitch black and soon sounded of moving sheets and grunts of my partner trying to get comfortable. There was a strange pattern after that of silence, growls, and ruffle... silence, growls, and ruffles for about ten minutes. My eyes stayed open during all of this, but were suddenly squeezing shut, hands trying to aid as a shield and protect them from the light that Ginji just turned back on.
My neck craned to let me see him and I was immediately saddened by the look on his face. His eyes were nearly bloodshot, even during such a short period of time, unless they've been that way for a while and I didn't notice. But that's unlikely. I always notice Ginji's eyes. Golden hair was strayed and messy from his constant journey of sheet twisting, and his hands were once again, clinging to the pillow like a child to his only toy.
I knew what was coming… It's happened more than once; every once and a while, on those nights where Ginji can't sleep for a number of reasons. It could be loneliness, worry, memories, anything; there was usually something that would keep him from shutting his lids. The first time it happened, I was unsure of what to do… for the first five seconds, anyway. He was almost in hysterics because he had a nightmare where everyone was gone. Not a big surprise. He held those important to him on a very high level. It was then I offered him the space beside me, where he gladly curled up and buried his face into my shirt like a kid that was thankful that his parents where letting him sleep with them, because the monsters would go away if he did. He was dozing soon after.
Now, every time Ginji has trouble, I let him sleep with me, 'coz it's the only way I know of that will calm him down.
"I'm sorry, Ban-chan," his eyes were glazed over and wet, but he was not on the verge of tears. It was all probably fatigue. "I can't sleep. Can I…?"
He trailed off, somehow not wanting to finish his question, but I had already made room and patted the extra space next to me. In no time at all, a warm bundle squished itself into me, somehow sending chills through my body, unless that was a small static shock from the first touch of skin on skin. The way Ginji managed to slip his body against mine and fill in every available breathing space was a mystery to me, but nothing has ever felt so right. His hair brushed my chin and I breathed in his scent, which was sweet and inviting. A wave of passion grew within me, and I found myself wanting to caress the silky skin that was right next to me, and claim his slightly parted lips, but I did not act upon it. There had to be another way to go about it, after all.
Something that wouldn't make him hate me, or scare the shit out of him. Heh...
Ginji sighed through his nose, whispering a barely audible thank you, then proceeded to rest his hand on my shoulder, gently taking a secure hold on it.
"G'night, Ban-chan…"
Another thank you was hidden somewhere in those words, and I smirked.
His lips remained hardly open, only tempting me further. I licked my lips as I looked. Ginji was half asleep already, as if I somehow eased the tension and helped in his sleeping process, and I took the time to rest my palm to his forehead and slowly run it back through his hair. The blonde mumbled – moaned, my mind wanted to tell me – and he shifted a little, only to go back to the same position as before.
It was hard for others to comprehend our relationship, how Ginji could relax like he did around me. They couldn't begin to understand why he had placed such undying trust and loyalty into someone like me. But Ginji understands me, and I think I understand him more than anyone, even Ginji himself. I like to think so, anyway, especially after remembering snippets of conversation between Shido and myself…
'…I don't understand how I worked under him. Back when Ginji was called the Lightning Emperor, he wasn't weirdly cheerful and he didn't put on a show like he does now. But the way he's so quick to feel mercy… That hasn't changed a bit.'
We had continued to walk through the maze that was the Limitless Fortress, carrying on with small talk and petty insults… till I brought up the subject of Makubex…
'This Makubex bastard… what's he like, anyway?'
'Ginji hasn't told you anything at all?'
'No.'
That one word was hard to say in front of Shido, for it was a strange competition between the two of us since we met. Admitting that he knew more about Ginji's history in the den of demons than I did struck a chord, but I had ignored it.
'Unlike me and Kazuki, who came from the outside, Ginji and Makubex grew up here in the Limitless Fortress; the worst of all possible cities. I don't know if that's why, but they both had ways in which they were strangely cold. Like you couldn't begin to fathom what they were thinking.'
'But that stuff's all in the past, isn't it?'
And it was in the past, but that didn't mean it was out of Ginji's memory completely, or his system. Growing up there had given him advanced reflexes and more alertness than most people. But all that mattered was the way Ginji was now, and right now, the ex-gang leader needed me to make him feel safe as he settled in my bed, in my arms.
The fluttering of his closed lids led me to understand that he was not yet asleep, but his guard was down. He looked defenseless, vulnerable… Easy to take advantage of. Hell, he was. Right now, anyway. Like he knew it was okay around me. And it's so much easier for me to keep him safe when he was as close as he was now. Any other time, I need a leash or at least a stinkin' tracker just to keep him out of trouble. His trust was easily too gained, and near impossible to shatter, and that led me to drag his ass from certain doom more than once. But it was all a responsibility I took on with open arms.
Eh, but right now my arms were closed, wrapped around the solid mass of warmth that was my partner, though I can't seem to recall when they had gotten that way. Not that it mattered. It was only a minute that had gone by, but Ginji was undoubtedly sleeping by now, he was fast when it came to that, a snore so light you had to be inches away from his mouth the hear the sound even in the dead silence of the room. For one long instant, I was lost in the moment of the two of us practically tangled into each other, sharing the same bed that just happened to be made for one, but Ginji unknowingly tore that moment away from me when he shifted in his sleep, rolling closer to the edge. Away from me. It was then I realized just how cold I was by myself, even with the blankets. Frustrated, not really wanting to force Ginji to open his tired eyes after I'd just helped to close them, but refusing to accept the cold, I reached over and placed a hand on his slowly rising and falling shoulder.
"Mmm, I'm sorry…"
Ginji was barely waking when he spoke, slowly turning so he was lazily facing me, eyes half lidded and hands tucked under his chin in weak fists. His eyes were apologetic; more than likely thanking it was him who had woken me. I tugged at him, trying to indicate that I wanted him to come back to me. He was too tired to make anymore words at that point to respond to my request, so he laid a hand on my arm, expression telling me to elaborate my actions.
"Hn… you were keeping me warm."
Smiling sleepily, he scooted over to me and was once again pressing his weight against me, balling up so he could remain comfortable without sacrificing the feel of me next to him.
"…Must be the electricity…"
He breathed those words, seeming to only be thinking out loud and re-nuzzled his nose into my sleeve. Ginji's actions were innocent and friendly, never meaning anything past trying to find a satisfying position. He continued with these movements that if made by anyone else, would have been a sign of interest, very suggestive, until his body was cozy against my own. Not that Ginji wasn't interested. By that I mean he was fascinated by the slightest thing, and for all I know, he was intrigued by the fabric of my shirt. Soft breaths of his slumber told me he had once again, quickly drifted, and I could finally slip into my own dreams, which usually consisted of something close to what was going on right now.
My lids were not closed for long, however, as Ginji's voice began sending almost incoherent sounds into the still air.
"Ban-chan..."
My interest had been… well, sparked instantly and my eyes opened halfway, though all I could see was the outline of Ginji's sleeping form, courtesy of the full moon that was shining outside the window. The bluish-white tint gently poured over him and traced his profile until his head tucked into my chest again. Hopefully, my pounding heart was not so load that it would wake him.
It was breathless, the way he had said my name, desperate almost. The tone made me curious, of all things, and I listened intently. When no more sound came, I nudge his cheek with my thumb.
"Ahh… Ban-chan…"
I couldn't quite place the emotion behind it, if there was any at all, but something inside me wanted to believe it was need, passion, even longing. Again my name tumbled over his clumsy tongue, and soon it became a chant, growing more frantic and winded with each repetition. Soon, I found that waiting for the ongoing ring of my name to stop was useless. Ginji was full of energy, even in his sleep. But as I brushed the back of my fingers against his forehead in a simple attempt to calm him, I inwardly gasped at the sticky texture of his skin. It forced me to notice the increasing perspiration that was making his flawless completion shimmer even in the dark. Every once and a while, an outlet of breath would be accompanied by a whimper of protest, and it was all I could take.
"Ginji… Ginji, wake up." I shook him more with every second he refused to stir. "You're having another nightmare."
Simultaneously, he swatted my hand away and snapped his eyes open. The reasons that small blue sparks visibly danced around his ears were literally endless. Ginji would often dream about the place of his childhood, that lawless zone that he had been forced to call a home. A place I didn't want totrouble Ginji like it did, but forcing yourself to forget was like leaving behind all your childhood memories. And he had precious memories hidden between the dark ones.
On nights like this, I tend to assume that's what he dreams about, or uh, has nightmares about, I should say. His past, or becoming Raitei, something he's not so proud of. It may just be why electricity is sometimes flashing around him when he wakes up; after all, the sparks could be from the dream Emperor's anger, or from firm understanding of his own power, knowing his limitations and capabilities. Or perhaps it was just a reaction to something he didn't like seeing. Maybe it was just as uncontrollable as someone snoring. Who knows? The list goes on.
Whatever the reason was, the bright electric streaks disappeared when Ginji's eyes proved he was fully awake. But the awareness in them was soon clouded with moisture, his sensitive heart seemingly jumping out to me for comfort. I could hear strange sounds coming from his throat, trying to force back any audible weakness in front of his idol.
I said his name, and it was like my voice had plowed over the last defensive wall of his grief. It almost felt like I had just destroyed a dam because after the last syllable was out, the salty tears started flowing, his eyes squeezing shut to prevent them from coming and his teeth tried to barrier his soft sobs. Both attempts failed like a snowman on the sun.
Before I could console him or bring my arms fully around him, he threw himself at me urgently, eyes tightly closed as he did so like he knew I would be waiting for him. I was sitting up now; Ginji slumped over my lap in a big heap. His hands wound into the front of my shirt, not even having enough mind to wrap them fully around me. It didn't take long for his ghost of cries to turn into heavy breaths and limited tears. His eyes were puffy when he pulled away, apologizing over and over again, refusing to stop no matter how many times I told him it was alright or told him he had no reason to be sorry for something he couldn't help.
He apologized for being sorry.
Ginji knew. He knew I wasn't sure how to go about situations like this. Yet I was always the one he came to, when his walls came crashing down and needed to be repaired again. Probably because he knew that even though it was all strange to me, I would give him what he needed. And as this thought crossed my mind, my hands that were resting on his back pulled him nearer, his body rolling forward to help me, his head diving deeper into a sea that was my shirt.
"Oh, Ban-chan!" He leaned forward to hold me tighter still, but when I realized this was going to tell me nothing, my hands went to his shoulders and held him back. I wanted him to look me in the eyes. "It was horrible! Horrible!"
Regardless of my hands restraining him, his body kept tensing as he tried repeatedly to lean against me, as though he needed the reassurance that much. I finally gave in and he was filling arms perfectly again, rambling on about his dream, but I could only hear certain words that rushed out of him.
"…couldn't… so scared… dark and… tried calling but… gone… -chan! Everyone was gone…"
But I understood perfectly. Anyone would've. Ginji's nightmares were always violent or haunting or a mix of both, and often sent him tripping over himself in his melodrama. For his comfort, he needed to be touched, needed that contact to let him know that he wasn't alone… He was never alone, he just… needed to remind himself from time to time. I was there, too…
"So I guess you forgot again, eh, Ginji?"
His brown irises rose to meet mine, sniffing. "Huh?"
"About the S in GetBackers?"
"I could never forget!" He seemed offended, but only for a second. "It means I'm never alone."
"Never."
"Right!"
"That's right…"
His cheeks turned pink underneath the sticky layer of drying tears, and he managed a smile, his past emotional outburst seeming overly-done and silly. He wiped away the emotions from his eyes with the back of his arm, taking a steady sigh to bring himself to conclusion.
"Forgive me, Ban-chan," he repeated the action, making sure that any trace of his sadness was erased. "It all just seemed so real."
"They usually do."
"Really, really real."
"I understand. I know a lot about dreams."
As we spoke, we rediscovered our earlier positions on the bed, laying down, though I held onto Ginji a bit tighter.
"Think you can sleep again?"
"Yes."
"You sure?"
"I'm sure, Ban-chan. You can be my dream catcher."
As Ginji closed his eyes, I couldn't help but wonder if he was aware of just how chaste and beautifully poetic he sounded at times. I also wondered how he always managed to get that silly grin on my face, as I reached over Ginji's head to kill the lights for the last time that night. Just as I did so, the wind outside blew harshly against the window in the hot night air. The leaves rustled and trees creaked, and it would have been nice, accompanying Ginji's breathing, if it weren't for some of the nighttime sounds reminding me so much of Akabane's laughter.
I pulled Ginji closer.