Thanks to those who reviewed: Takeshi of Gondor, iluvglorfindel, and Faith04!

Chapter 7

As soon as we were inside the bathroom, I began getting out a towel from the drawer and filling the tub with water.

"So," I said, while doing my work, "I figured that you can just take a nice warm bath. It'll get the dirt off and – "

I paused because she was just sitting on the toilet seat staring off into space.

"Are you okay, Buffy?"

I knelt before her and looked into her eyes.

"Is there anything you want to talk about?" I knew she was probably sensitive right now so I asked carefully.

"Spike. Does-Does he live here too?" she asked me.

I smiled at her question. So that's what she was puzzled about this whole time. And that explained why she was staring after Spike in such weird ways.

"Was that the question that has been on your mind?"

She nodded, but what I didn't know was that she was lying to me. That wasn't what was bothering her, but it was one of the many questions she had.

"So..um. Does he?"

"Yep! Well- er no. Not technically. He still lives in his crypt. But he spends most of his time with me, so basically it's like he's living here. I asked him to live here from now on, earlier tonight."

"...And you're okay with this?" she wondered.

"Yeah...why wouldn't I be? He's like my best friend."

"You think you love him," she said, frankly. I didn't know whether she meant like love love...or just love like a brother, but I answered her question.

"Yeah. I do. And he told me he loved me."

"How? Why would you - ...Dawn, you don't love him."

I looked at her unbelievably. "What, of course I- "

"No, Dawnie," she said running a hand up and down my arm. "I think you are misunderstanding yourself. You can't love him. He-he is a killer! A monster! An evil soulless vampire. You're still young and can't see this. He might be nice to you, but that doesn't change what he is."

I shook my head and smiled at her ignorance. It hadn't surprised me in any way. In fact, it was just the reaction I had expected.

"You say that. But you don't even know him."

She started to interrupt me, but I wouldn't let her.

"Buffy, you haven't been here for about two months. He isn't the same guy he was two months ago. He isn't just some stupid vampire who is obsessed with you. Heck, he isn't the same guy he was a week ago. And I know exactly what is changing him."

"And what is that?" She asked sharply, certainly getting annoyed.

"Me. And you. Every day that he is around us, he becomes a little more human. Sure, he still is a vampire. But you know what, I see his soul and he doesn't even have one. He has protected me, not like a bodyguard...not like it's some task...and not just because he had promised you...but like...(I looked into her eyes)...like I was the only family he had...like I was his life."

Buffy simply stared downward. I could tell that she still didn't understand, but I could see a few gears starting to turn in her head. Good sign.

"Buffy, you just have to believe in him, and then... you'll see the real Spike ."

I smiled at her, indicating that I wasn't all depressed that she questioned me.

"You get in the bathtub. If you need anything, I'll be right here."

The door clicked shut as I walked towards her room, and cleaned it up a bit. I wiped the comforter of her bed, where the dirt had stained it a little bit, from her dress. I then walked over to the closet and selected a pajama bottom and a tank top to sleep in. I walked mechanically around the room doing all this for a good ten minutes, because the whole time, I was thinking about our conversation in the bathroom, and about Spike. Everyone thought he was a killer, because that was the easy way out. The easy way out was to blame it on the demon inside him. But they don't see...they just don't see it...

I quickly dropped the clothes on the bed and flew down the stairs. I walked slowly into the family room to see the TV on, and the back of his head turned to his favorite soap- Passions .

(A/N: WHAT BUFFY EXPERIENCES IN THIS CHAPTER IS UNKNOWN TO DAWN AT THIS POINT IN THE STORY. I'M JUST TELLING THE STORY FROM DAWN'S POV, AS THOUGH SHE'S TELLING EVERYTHING AFTER THE STORY HAPPENED)

Meanwhile, Buffy stepped out of the bathtub feeling more relaxed than before. She quickly changed into her PJs, but still she felt queasy, and dizzy, and out of place.

She didn't know if she could take it anymore. Being the Slayer. Being...just alive in this world. How could she live, knowing what heaven was like? She tried to be strong, or at least act strong for me. She did love me. I was her life now. She loved her friends, but they were the ones who had done it...brought her back. And she really didn't want to see them. She was too scared of how she would act in front of them. They were all depressed about leaving her there to claw her way out of her grave. She didn't care about that though.

She looked down at her knuckles. They were still bleeding, but they would heal eventually. She sighed and looked over at the scissors on her desk and contemplated whether she should just stab herself now and get it over with.

She snatched the scissors and held it up to her gut...but she couldn't do it. She dropped them on the bed and cried.

She cried, and no one could know why she grieved. She had to keep it to herself ...forever. No one could know.

Cursing at her knuckles, blood still seeping through her skin, she hastily wiped her tears, and headed downstairs to take care of them. She hoped that this internal wound would heal like her knuckles, soon enough.

---------------------------------------------

Spike usually didn't like to hug...just for no reason. But I felt the urge to hug him so bad right now. I was desperate. I needed to show him, how much I did appreciate the way he took care of me and loved me, even though no one else acknowledged this help much.

Okay. The plan was this: I was going to make a funny comment about Passions, sit down next to him pretending to watch, and the hug him tightly. He'd never expect it. It was my foolproof plan. I grinned like an idiot to myself as I stalked over to the couch.

I started, "So, what happened to Timmy this-"

When I looked at him, I stopped suddenly. His face was soaking wet, obviously with tears. I saw that the front of his shirt was a darker color, indicating that he had shed even more tears after wiping his face. He looked at me, eyes cold, and turned back to the TV. I knew it. He was crying...over Buffy.

"Oh Spike." I flung myself on him, hugging him so tightly.

He croaked out, "'S nothin'. Was just watchin' some Passions , and it just made me a lil' teary eyed."

I gave out a small laugh.

"You're such a crappy liar."

He chuckled and then sniffled a little bit, and then looked at me.

Buffy tiptoed down stairs and stopped when she heard Spike's voice sound...different. Like, like he had been... crying .

She crouched a little bit and saw me in his arms, while wewere talking. She froze and listened closely to what he was saying, extremely curious as to why a vampire ought to be crying.

"It's just...I just love her so bloody much. My heart can't take it much longer. First, I thought I would never see her again. But to see her here, now. I mean, don't think I'm not bleedin' thrilled about her bein' here. But, to see her in front of me once again, and to know what she thinks of me."

Buffy's face dropped. 'Well, he's never shown me a reason not to think that way...the buffy-bot...the things he does...it's creepy'.

"She thinks of me as a soulless monster. That I can never have feelings. That I'm incapable of loving. I'm such a git, wastin' my tears away like a bloody poof at the fact that I, a vampire, doesn't a have a chance with the Slayer."

'He didn't have a chance with me,'Buffy thought. But somehow the 'soulless vampirebad' argument was starting to get rusty.

I thought about what he had said...about not having a chance with her. But I understood why..I mean...she had learned, first hand...with Angelus, why she could never trust a soulless vampire.

"She knows that you love me. And that I love you." I said.

He chortled slightly. "So does she know about our wedding, Niblet?"

I gave him a confused look, but then it occurred to me that my phrasing had been a little weird. I swatted him, playfully. "No, silly. That's not the point."

Buffy almost giggled out loud at their misunderstanding.

"Spike. I love you. So much that my heart would burst if you weren't near me. And I know how happy you are right now, because I feel that too. Buffy is back! She's back! -as in alive and stuff. And I know that for you, this happiness comes hand in hand with misery. But I don't know what that's like. To love someone...and not have them love you back."

Buffy unconsciously sucked in a breath. She didn't know that I loved him THAT much, and that I felt for him THAT much. She pondered whether Spike actually DID have feelings. I mean, she had now seen it right before her own eyes. But she shut herself up to listen to everything I said.

Spike looked at me, eyes watering once more.

"You know why I can't understand," I continued. "It's because I have loved three people in my whole...ehh...how long has it been. Eight months of living? You, my mom, and Buffy. You have shown me what love truly is - enough for me to make a distinction between those I truly love, those I wouldn't be able to survive without, and those who I could survive without. And that itself shows, that you have the idea of love, that you hold your definition of love, and when you love, you love with all your heart. William."

I had grown up so much. And it was then that Buffy had realized that. That I wasn't some young, naïve kid who didn't know what she was feeling. It was now that she knew, that my opinions and my advice were worth listening to. She realized that I had been through a lot, more than she could imagine. And through those experiences I had grown and matured. Buffy knew it now. She felt it as I spoke. And she felt my words brainwashing her.

He had looked down for a second, but upon hearing his name spill out of my mouth, his eyes shot back up to meet mine.

"Yes, William." I giggled slightly, "I'm calling you that 'cause...there is still William inside you. And I bet that isn't normal for a vamp, but now ...I see more William in you than ever."

"From now on, it isn't going to be like it was two months ago. Too much has changed. With Buffy, with us, with the gang. Everything is different. It's a clean wiped, new slate. Even yours. I wiped yours clean for you today, in front of Buffy. She has always been too stubborn to open up to someone after Angel, let alone another vampire. But that will all change in time. I promise you this. That Buffy will recognize that you love her. She will recognize the man that you are...(I looked deeply into his eyes)...and the William that you have here." I placed my hand over his chest.

Buffy's eyes were darting everywhere, her mind spinning. 'Was Dawn really right? Was there something in Spike, that I had never seen before?' She knew there was a reason that I wouldn't let down on him. There had to be a reason why I cared for him. He must have been more than just a monster, for me to have acknowledged that. So that was when Buffy made up her mind. It was settled. She was going to give Spike a chance. She wasn't promising to have feelings for him, but she was promising that she would try to be friends with him.

I didn't know where the hell my little talk had come out from, but it look like it had worked. His eyes had dried up somewhat, and he just sniffled. Damn, I was good. But I kinda surprised myself with that speech. What was that like three whole minutes of me just going on and on? But I figured most of it made sense, at least in my head. But the point of that was to show him that he did matter to me, and that he would matter to her.

I leaned forward and kissed his forehead. I pulled back, and he gave me an appreciative smile. He understood that it wasn't anything romantic, just a gesture out of kindness.

The look on Buffy's face, though, was priceless. 'What the hell. DID DAWN JUST KISS SPIKE?' But I could understand her reaction. And I definitely wouldn't have kissed him, had I known that she was watching!

I smiled at him, and said brightly, "Next time a Summers female kisses you, it won't be me."

He grinned back at me sheepishly. Buffy released a breath she was holding in, when she realized that Spike and my relationship was on a completely different plateau than any others. She was right. We were best friends, but we weren't in love. I wanted them two to be in love, but I couldn't force it. Buffy was at ease, knowing that Spike and I really were only friends.

Buffy gave a small smile, although Spike and I didn't know she was there, and headed upstairs to go sleep in her bed.

------------------------------

"Get some sleep, lil' bit."

"You too, Spike."

"Uh, hello. Vampire. Sleep during the day."

"No you don't Spike! You hang out with me during the day, and sleep during the night!"

"Oh...uh...yeah."

I laughed and ran upstairs to go check on Buffy.

I opened the door to find her asleep in her bed. Her face was glowing in the moonlight. I had really missed her. I, myself crawled into bed next to her and kissed her cheek.

"I love you Buffy. Sweet dreams."

And when she wrapped her arms around me in return, my heart cried in joy.

End of Chapter.

I AM SOO SORRY IF YOU GUYS GOT CONFUSED IN THE MIDDLE!

Please Review though! I didn't want to change POV's cuz I think you guys got confused last time I did that...so umm...yea...