Let's find out what Jen has in store for her starting off the school year.
Disclaimer: This stuff belongs to J.K. Rowling and not me, no matter how much I may want it.
The bowls were set out on the kitchen counter, full of steaming macaroni. Stabbing spoons into the hot food and setting out napkins, the mother sat beside her daughter, placing cups of milk in front of both bowls. After taking a sip of milk, the daughter, who had waited for much longer than she desired, asked the question that had been burning in her mind for the past ten minutes.
"So what happened next?"
"You really won't wait, will you?" asked the mother, doubtfully. The young girl shook her head, her black hair flopping messily about her face.
"Very well, just until the macaroni cools, okay?" she said, before launching into another segment of her tale.
Once in my robes, I left the train, trusting that my training would be enough. While the workers were busy taking the trunks and animals off the train, I stuck around near Prankster.
I surveyed the scenery. There was a large stone castle across a glassy blue lake. It looked like it had been there since the beginning of time itself, as it seemed, wizards and witches had. All those fairy tales from my earlier years and the creatures in them were seeming less and less impossible. Were there really giant spiders? Unicorns? Mermaids? Dragons? Centaurs? Snakes more than 50 ft long? It seemed that almost anything was possible in this world. Was immortality one of them?
I was abruptly brought out of my musings by a booming voice.
"First years, over here!" called a giant man with a lantern over the heads of the crowd. All of my future classmates and victims went toward the voice. Once I was sure all the bags were off the train and all the first years were with the giant, I whispered the signal to Prankster and hurried off toward the lantern with the others.
"Now, my name's Hagrid. I'm the keeper of keys an' grounds 'round here. It's custom tha' the first years' travel by boat across the lake to the castle. Get in! Three to a boat! Hurry up!"
I got in with Draco and Crabb, who stayed together at the opposite end of the boat from me. They must have learned their lesson to stay away from me. The boats propelled themselves across the lake. I checked, but there were no motors. Was perpetual motion possible?
I looked back over at the station that we had come from. All I saw was a flutter of wings toward the castle gates. It had begun.
"What had begun, what happened?" interrupted the small girl.
"You'll find out soon enough, but I won't tell you if you don't start eating." answered the mother defiantly. Sulkily, the girl turned and began eating spoonfuls of food slowly as she listened eagerly to the story.
When we reached the castle, many things seemed like they were out of order and not where they should be. There were books and papers lying on the ground. In some places, there were broken jars near a foot-deep hole. Occasionally, you might see a toad hop by or a cat slink past you.
It seems that I had trained Prankster well. He had successfully let himself and all the other animals out of their cages ane led them all up to the castle. Then, somehow instructed the other owls to attack the people in the halls. The cats and owls would have eaten all the mice in the castle by now. If my luck had held up, he would have gone to the potions room and broken all the containers and scattered them about the castle as well as hidden a few trunks in unlikely places. It would take them years to sort it all out.
We were met at the stairs by a stern old lady who, at first glance, seemed someone that you would not cross or else. She had black hair that was pulled back into a tight bun, but there were a few hairs out of place which made it seem like she wasn't having the best day of her life. She was dressed in robes of emerald green. Seemed a bit showoffey to me.
"I am Professor M. McGonagall. I hope that you will not judge the castle yet. We have had a bit of an accident. I am glad that none of you were involved or here to see the chaos." I didn't voice the fact that I would have loved to see the chaos that I had created. It was good to see the results of hard work before your eyes. I supposed I would have to get used to it though, if I was to stay the secret chief-trouble-maker.
"Follow me."
She led us into a large room made of cobblestones. I observed just then that that was what the castle was made of. I hadn't noticed before because I had been to busy admiring my work.
"Now, wait here. I will come and get you when it is time to be sorted. Each of you will be sorted into one of the three houses, Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, Griffindor, and Slytherin. While you are here, your house will be something like your family. You will sit with your house at meals, have classes with your house, and spend free time in your house common room. Also, while you are here, your achievements will gain house points while any rule breaking will lose house points. The house with the most points at the end of the year will be awarded the house cup."
A small midget wizard with wispy white hair came in and whispered something to Professor McGonagall. She nodded in an exhausted manner.
"Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go take care of something that seems to have come up in the potions room."
Ah, things are working out better than I expected.
"Mom, what house were you in?" asked the girl curiously.
"I'm getting there." said the mother impatiently, taking a bite of food.
"Can't you tell me now?" she pressed.
"Patience is a virtue you need to work on, young lady." said the mother, scolding her daughter.
The rest of the students huddled together in one large clump in the center of the room. What a bunch of wimps. Most of the first years were trying to decide what they might be asked to do to be sorted. Some thought you had to wrestle a troll while others thought you would need to know spells. Meanwhile, I squeezed my way into a corner and relaxed.
I was almost dozing off when it felt like my entire body had been plunged into a tub of ice cold water. Not the most pleasant wake up call, let me assure you.
"I still say we should give Peeves a chance." said a fat little transparent monk.
"My dear frier, a chance is the last thing I would give Peeves. He's always messing things up" said a transparent man, the one that had gone right through me.
Ghosts. The rest of the first years were terrified. Pansies. I had had one walk right through me and I wasn't scared!
"Ghosts! There really are ghosts at Hogwarts?" interrupted the young daughter.
"Yes, dear. Some nicer than others." affirmed the mother, nodding.
"And can they really walk through walls?" she asked, awestruck.
"Walk? Darling, they float through walls."
"Wow." The girl sat back in her chair, then moved to wash out her empty bowl in the sink. After gulping the rest of her milk, the mother followed, rinsing out both bowls and placing them in the sink for later washing. After drying off her hands, the mother allowed herself to be led to the large armchair in the living room, near the fireplace.
A warm fire crackled in the cozy room, and the mother sat down on the comfy chair, setting her daughter on a fluffy cushion on the carpeted floor. Once they were both settled the mother continued her story.
"Look here! The first years are waiting to be sorted!" said the translucent man.
"Hope to see you in Hufflepuff!" said the monk, waving cheerily at the terrified students.
"We are ready for you now." Professor McGonagall said. Shehad reentered the atrium without anyone noticing.
All I remembered from the incident with the ghosts was that the monk was from Hufflepuff, a very unpleasant wake-up call, and that some ghost named Peeves was a troublemaker.
We entered the Great Hall. It was a sight to see. There were four tables, one for each of the houses, and one at the end for the staff. The hall was illuminated by hundreds of floating candles. I looked up at the ceiling . . . was it the ceiling? Or did the hall just open up to the sky? Hermy answered my question for me, what a show-off. She said it was bewitched to look like the sky. Figures.
McGonagall brought out a three-legged stool and an old hat. Everyone was looking at it, so I did too. Suddenly, a rip at the brim opened like a mouth and the hat began to sing.
Oh, you may not think I'm pretty
but don't judge on what you see.
I'll eat myself if you can find
a smarter hat than me.
You can keep your bowlers black,
your top hats sleek and tall,
for I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat,
and I can cap them all!
There's nothing hidden in your head
the sorting hat can't see,
so try me on and I will tell you,
where you aught to be.
You might belong in Griffindor,
where dwell the brave at heart,
their daring nerve and chivalry
set Griffindors apart.
You might belong in Hufflepuff,
Where they are just and loyal,
those patient Hufflepuffs are true,
and unafraid of toil.
Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,
If you've a ready mind,
where those of wit and learning,
will always find their kind.
Or perhaps in Slytherin,
you'll make your real friends,
those cunning folk use any means,
to achieve their ends.
So put me on,
don't be afraid,
and don't get in a flap.
You're in safe hands,
though I have none,
for I'm a thinking cap!
The whole hall burst into applause, my self included. I had never seen a batty old hat talk, let alone sing! It would take me a little longer than I expected to get used to the wizarding world.
"Form a line in front of the hat, and I will call you up alphabetically. When I call your name, come and sit on the stool. I will then place the sorting hat on your head and you will be sorted into your houses."
This was a lot better than what most of the others had thought would happen. Ron was angry at his twin brothers for telling him they had to wrestle a troll, Harry looked relieved that he didn't have to perform any sort of trick, and Malfoy looked normal. His father had probably told him everything. What a Daddy's boy.
"Hannah Abbot!" A pink-faced girl with sandy blond hair stepped out of line three people in front of me. She put on the hat, which went down over her eyes and sat on the stool. After a moment ...
"Hufflepuff!" shouted the hat.
Looking relieved, she went and sat down at the table on the right, amid loud cheers. That monk looked happy to see her as well.
"Susan Bones!"
"Hufflepuff!" shouted tha hat again. Susan ran off to sit next to Hannah.
"Terry Boat!"
"Ravenclaw!"
The sorting continued in this matter. Booorrriiiiinngg. I woke up for that kid Malfoy. The hat had barley touched his head when it shouted "Slytherin!" The table on the far right cheered loudly. Again, I woke up for Potter. There was a long pause before the hat shouted "Griffindor!" The table on the far left cheered loudly, louder than any other cheer so far. The Weasly twins were shouting "We got Potter! We got Potter!"I was close to dozing in place when . . .
"Jennifer Smith!"
I stood up and went to the stool. After I sat down, I felt the hat drop over my eyes and heard a little voice in my head.
"Well well, let me see here, hmm, yes, a great deal of courage, I see, but a certain love of mischief, not a bad mind either..."
"Who are you and what are you doing in my head?" I said to the voice.
"I'm the sorting hat and I'm looking for information to try to place you." said the hat, in a bit of an annoyed tone.
"Well, that's nice and all, but GET OUT!" I shut my brain to the hat. No one is looking in my head unless I want them to. It's just a matter of principle. No one learns anything about me unless he or she is my friend and has earned my full trust.
"Slytherin!" shouted the hat.
"Slytherin, Mom? Did you know that all the . . ." the girl was cut off by her mother's recitation of the well-known fact.
"All the supporters of the Dark Lord were from Slytherin, I know. But he's gone now, and all his supporters are locked away safely in Azkaban. May I continue?" The girl nodded.
I walked over to the table on the far right and sat next to a slender girl with short black hair and pale blue eyes. The whole table was cheering for me except three boys, Malfoy, Crabb, and Goyle. They just glared at me from across the table.
I smiled sweetly at them. Malfoy glared even more evilly and the bodyguards cracked their knuckles. I raised an eyebrow at them and Crabb looked ready to stand up.
"Hello, I'm Ann Putnam." said the girl next to me. She was obviously trying to stop a confrontation from happening. I decided it was a good idea not to draw attention to myself. My workings in the castle had to be secret.
"Hi, I'm Jen Smith." Ann stuck out her hand, waiting for me to shake it. I did so politely, but grudgingly. I was saved from conversation by Ron getting sorted.
"Hold on, I know him." I said to Ann.
"Griffindor!" shouted the hat.
"Yeah, the whole Weasly family's in Griffindor." said Ann.
"Must be a courageous lot, then." I replied.
"Well, not really. Fred and George aren't afraid of detentions and such, but that's not much. Percy, the oldest one in school, is a real goody-two-shoes. Don't know about that new boy Ron, though. Anyways, the two oldest are definitely brave because one's a curse breaker for Gringots, the wizard bank, and the other's a dragon tamer."
"A dragon tamer!" I said, in awe. I guess dragons are real.
"Yeah. It sounds glamourous, but I heard it's a lot of hard work.." I decided that she was okay, not going to be a cohort in any plans, but not the but of any of my jokes.
By that time the sorting had finished, and I was starving.
A man with long silver hair a beard long enough to tuck into his belt stood up from the middle of the staff table. He had half-moon glasses, which I thought looked rather geeky, and twinkling blue eyes. I guessed that he had to be Albus Dumbledore, the Headmaster of Hogwarts.
"Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words and here they are. Needwick, bludder, odment, tweek, thank you."
Everyone in the hall clapped. I didn't know if I should laugh or clap or what.
"Erm, is Dumbledore crazy?" I asked Ann.
"Huh? Oh, well, he's a brilliant man, but he does do some pretty crazy things. The straight answer to your question is yes."
"Great." I was about to continue wondering aloud what on earth the school would be like when ...
"FOOD!" I exclaimed,myeyes eating up everything around me.Food had suddenly appeared everywhere. There was everything and anything you would like to eat, except pizza. I guess wizards don't like pizza. But there was roast beef, chicken, mashed potatoes, steak, salad, peas, corn, etc. It was all delicious.
Everyone around me was talking about one thing or another, but I was too busy eating to notice.
I ate and ate and ate, more than I should have actually eaten, but the food was just too good to stop! Once everyone had had their fill, the food all disappeared and left the golden plates and goblets sparkling clean.
"How the ..." I would have continued voicing my amazement if the desserts hadn't appeared suddenly in the same fashion. There were tons of sweets and candies. I had no idea what they all were, but they looked good enough to at least try them. Once again, delicious.
"I'm going to have the biggeststomach ache tomorrow, but it'll be worth it." I thought.
Once again, everything disappeared leaving the dishes and goblets looking as if nobody had eaten or drunk from them.
Dumbledore stood up and the hall went silent again.
"Just a few more words, now that we're all fed and watered. I have a few start-of-term notices to give you. First years should note that the forest on the grounds is forbidden to all pupils and some of our older students would do well to remember that too." He glanced at the Weasly twins before continuing. "I have also been asked by Mr. Filch, the caretaker, to remind you that no magic should be used between classes. Quiddich trials will be held in the second week of the term, anyone interested in playing for their house team should notify Madam Hooch. And finally, I must tell you that this year the third floor corridor on the right hand side is out of bounds to anyone who does not wish to die a most painful death." I laughed at this, but I was one of the few people who did. The only people I thought would die a painful death would be Malfoy or one of his body guards if they crossed on the wrong side of my path.
"He's not serious, is he?" Iwhispered to Ann.
"Must be, 'cause he usually gives a reason for things. I dunno, he could just be trying to scare students away from there 'cause there's something he doesn't want us to see." she replied.
"Now, before we go to bed, let us sing the school song."Dumbledore gave his wand a little flick and a long golden ribbon came out of the end and twisted itself into words.
"Everyone pick their favorite tune, and off we go."
The school sang in terrible discord:
Hogwarts, Hogwarts, hoggy-wotty-Hogwarts teach us something please.
Whether we be old and bald or young with scabby knees.
Our heads could do with filling with some interesting stuff,
for now they're bare and full of air, dead flies and bits of fluff.
So teach us things worth knowing, bring back what we forgot.
Just do your best, we'll do the rest and learn until our brains all rot.
Everyone ended at different times, and it sounded terrible. I chose the tune of "Yankee Doodle" because it was the only thing I could think of. Upon further reflection, I shouldn't have sung at all because, in my opinion, I couldn't carry a tune even if you gave me a bucket. The Weasly twins ended last, singing to a slow funeral march. Dumbledore conducted their last few lines and, when they were finished, he was one of those who clapped loudest.
"Ah, music." he said, whiping a tear from his eye."A magic beyond all we teach here. And now, before we go to bed, I would like to address the accident that happened earlier this evening. I believe we have a good lead as to who did it," his eyes flashed at the Weasly twins, "but if anyone has any information as to the culprit, please see myself or any of the teachers before you go to bed."
The opportunity was too good to pass up. I went over to Dumbledore. I was going to tell him some of what the twins had told me about their plan.
"Excuse me, Professor?" I said politely to the old man.
"Yes? And who would you be?" he asked, equally polite and kind.
"I'm Jen Smith, a new Slytherin. I think I know who might have caused the accident." I answered, in as innocent a tone as I could muster.
"Well Jen, please, tell me what you know."
"I was wandering the train on the way here and I happened to overhear, well actually, the Weasly twins told me that they were planning a little mayhem to start off the school year. I don't remember exactly what they said the plan was, but it definitely had something to do with animals." I said. I hadn't said anything untrue, had I? This was proving to be just too easy.
"Ah, thank you Jen. I will investigate those two carefully, seeing as they were the original suspects. It seems that you have proved that they were indeed who did it. I thank you again." Dumbledore's kind eyes blinked at me, and I saw he had believed my story.
He smiled at me and I smiled back. It was very hard to not make the smile seem forced or evil, but I believe it was good.
"Minerva?" he called to McGonagall, "Will you be kind enough to, ahem, catch the Weasly twins on their way out? This nice girl here has just tipped me off that they were behind it as we suspected. I trust you, as head of Griffindor House, to deal with them."
"I see. Thank you dear." She waved at me before hurrying after the Griffindors.
"This is way too easy." I muttered to myself as I hurried after Ann and the rest of the first years.
"Mom, you told on them for what you did?" the daughter said, shocked.
"I warned you I was a delinquent at your age." she answered, knowingly.
"Yeah, but that's really bad, Mom."
"I know it was, and don't you be getting any ideas that it isn't." said the mother, nodding.