Tapan: I'm on Passover vacation, people! And I just finished this lovely fic!

Torna: don't you have a life?

Tapan/fists on hips, proudly/ No! No I don't! This is my life, baby!

Torna: I see…. Never call me "baby" again.

Tapan: ok…sweetie. /giggles/

Torna/growls, blushing slightly. /

Declaimer: I don't own it, so don't ask. And I really don't feel like writing a long disclaimer. (Even though I just did.)

Warning: slash! And once again, if anyone wants to flame, be my guest. Operators are standing by. /Torna watching the reviewers with a shotgun. / TORNA! Put the gun down!

"I don't get what you're asking, Dib." Deb looked up from her computer where she was previously typing like there's no tomorrow. "What exactly do you mean by 'been together'?"

Dib rubbed his arm as the girl stared at him blankly. "Well, you know--"

"Intimate?"

"I guess, yeah. Wait! No! Just together!"

"Oooh." She paused and looked back at her screen. "I'm still not getting it. You mean, not enemies?"

Dib sighed in relief, suddenly feeling like he was playing charades with a toddler. "Yes, that one."

Deb hesitated before leaning back in her chair, thinking. "I guess we stopped fighting around the seventh grade. Tam decided to call a truce for god knows what reason. Maybe she was banished here or something.

"Anyway, we were both very awkward at the idea, at first. You know, I still wanted to expose her, and she still wanted to take over the world. But after a while, it seemed like the mission just fell out of place.

"One day, I was walking home from school, Gim was still with me at the time. Then suddenly, she just attacked me from behind. Still not fully trusting her, I had a small water pistol in my pocket and I pulled it out and shot her in between the eyes." Deb pointed to where she shot her. "She screamed, then past out. I didn't think she'd get knocked out, but maybe I hit a weak spot.

"I ended up bringing her home with me, she took my bed until she woke up. When she did, I realized there was something different about her. For example, at a mere contact between us, she'd pull away extremely quickly."

Dib remembered to when Zim wiped the bit of sauce off his cheek.

Deb noticed Dib's zoned look, but continued just the same. "Somehow that night, we ended up exposing hiding feeling. I myself was in denial about it for a long time."

Dib's eyes widened as he tuned in to what his counterpart said. Hesitant, he cleared his throat a little before speaking again. "And, exactly, how close are you two?"

The girl sighed slightly, and forced herself not to look at her twin. "We're partners?"

" 'Partners'?" it suddenly dawned on him. "As in married? But you're too young for that!"

"In the irken sense, Dib. Not human." Her typing came at a fast pace and, for a second, Dib believed she was typing gibberish. "Irken Marriage, if you can call it that, is nothing like human. Once the couple gets." Deb coughed slightly. "Intimate, the irkens produces a chemical that coats over their mate. No soap in the universe can wash that off. It also burns, leaving a permanent mark on the body." Deb lifted her shirt to show Dib the marking.

"So you're hers, but what about you?"

"I used water. Less affective, but It did the job. After that it's like having sex with a human." (A/N: for those of you who are bored, don't worry. The sex and stuff will be coming up. This is just developing)

"But doesn't this interfere with-"

"Anything? No not at all. In the irken culture, the idea of same sex mating is not unusual in the least bit. Just look at the Tallests! You see, in the irken society, they have a new way to procreate so it's not so essential to have a male-female relationship. Almost makes you wish the human race was the same way."

Dib sighed and stared at the floor. "So are you really…"

"Gay?" Deb cocked an eyebrow. "Yes. Yes I am. And unless something truly miraculous happened in your dimension, so are you and Zim." /way to be blunt, Deb/

Dib sucked in a deep breath. "I… didn't mean anything by it."

"I know. But Dib." She patted the boy on the top of the head as if he was her son. "Get out of the closet, it's a very uncomfortable place. I know, I've been there." With that, Deb turned back to her work.

((Tam's base: Lab))

Zzz.zzzz.. Zzzz…ZAPP!

"OW! SHIT!" Tam cradled her right hand in her left, cursing in English, Irken and a language she just made up for the occasion.

"I bet that hurt." Zim snickered in his corner and went back to whatever he was working on.

"No one asked you!" Tam threw a small chunk of metal at the male irken, but missed slightly. Zim just hummed to himself and continued with his new toy.

Curious now, Tam walked over quietly and looked over Zim's shoulder, earning herself a glare and a push.

"What are you doing?" Tam cocked an "eyebrow."

"Nothing of importance to you, but I WILL TELL YOU ANYWAY!" Zim picked up the little device, which currently were more wires than anything else. "It is a lie detector thingy. Much more advanced than the human version, but with the same concept." With steady fingers, the irken attached a few wires and smiled when he heard the contraption beep, signaling it's alive. "Now, Tam. Tell me the nature of you relationship with the Deb."

Tam brought her arms behind her back and closed her eyes in that "I'm all mighty" style. "There's nothing between us, Zim."

The bundle of wires beeped and a little red light started to flash. Tam blinked down at it.

Zim smirked. "And the machine works!"

Tam's eyes widened at the idea of Zim pulling one over on her. Well, if he wanted to play, she would teach him the rules.

Snatching the device away from Zim, she smirked back. "And I assume this means you feel nothing for the Dib? After all, you two did seem awfully close on my couch."

Zim then spoke without thinking of the small device. "That's a sickening thought! I'd never DREAM of doing anything with my enemy, such as you have!"

The little light flashed once again. Tam made an 'ah' face as Zim stared blankly, realizing he's been tricked.

"The machine must be broken!" he pulled it away.

"It works fine and you know it." Tam crossed her arms.

Zim growled and continued his work.

"Awww are you upset that I know your secret?" Tam taunted the invader, poking him in the head. "After all, If Deb and I are mates, why not you and Dib?"

"Mates?"

Tam smiled. "Yes, Zim. We are bound together for all eternity. Didn't you see the burn mark on the child's stomach?"

Zim looked up, eyes impossible wide.

"Hm, I didn't think so." She turned and walked back to her work, before coming up with another idea.

((Membrane house))

The phone rang, Deb didn't flinch. It was usually someone for her mother, and she always got to it before anyone else could.

She looked over at Dib. He lay on her bed, staring up at the ceiling, contemplating. He's been that way since their discussion. The two haven't spoken a word to each other, only babbling out loud to themselves every one in a while.

"Daughter! Your foreign friend is on the phone!" the girl snapped her head in the direction of the door. Her mother knocked on it lightly. "Can I come in?"

"Uh! Just a minute, Mom." quickly, she pulled the covers over dib. The boy gasped in surprise, but otherwise stayed silent. "Okay you can come in now."

The scientist opened the door and stepped into her daughter's room. "Here you go! You'll have to hurry though. I left, Johnson with some very unstable chemicals and I need the phone line open."

Deb brought the phone to her ear, slightly nervous when her mother didn't leave, but walked around the room. "Hello?"

"Deb, I have a brilliant idea! What if we bring Dib over here tomorrow as we go to school? That way, you don't have to worry about your mother."

"Yeah, that sounds good."

"Okay, that's all for now. I'll see you tomorrow." Deb's eyes widened when the older woman walked over to her bed, poking at the lump that was Dib, curious.

Dib moved slightly. She poked him again. He moved again.

Now on guard, she pulled off the covers.

"No! Mom!" Deb hung up the phone and stood up. Too little too late.

Dib smiled nervously at the Professor. "Uh, hi!"

Dib was amazed at how much the woman looked like his father. They both wore the same lab coat, which covered her nose and mouth. Her goggles were a shade lightly than her male counterpart's, but still showed no sign of eyes. She had more hair, but still black, and still with the odd scythe perched on the top. Her chest was a little bigger, but not by much.

"Deb?" she looked up at her daughter. They also have the same intense way of speaking, Dib noted. "Why is there this boy lying in your bed?"

"Okay, mom, it's not what you think. Him and Tam's male counterpart fell from the sky from another dimension. We're trying to get them back there, with no luck so far." Deb shut her eyes tightly, wondering what would happen next. Her mother laughing, going to the crazy house for girls (again!) Dib and Zim being taken away for experiments.

"Oh, is that all?" Deb opened her eyes and looked up at her mother. "I've heard of this happening before. It's a clash within the two dimensions. You have a limited amount of time to get the boys back, or they'll be stuck here, forever."

Membrane took the phone away form her daughter and began to walk out. "You are allowed to use any equipment in my lab for this, as long as you don't do anything dangerous." She turned back. "I would help you, but I have to solve world hunger at seven, followed by an autograph session. Good luck, you two."

With that, Membrane walked out of the room. When she knew she was out of hearing range, the professor pulled up her sleeve. "Membrane, are you there?"

The screen blinked before her male counterpart appeared on the screen. "Oh, hello! It's been a while!"

"Yes it has, two months tomorrow. I just want tot tell you, your son is here with my daughter, along with the green fellow. I'll give them a few days to see if they can figure it out, before helping them."

"Oh, ok. Just make sure they don't get stuck there. That would be TERRIBLE!" the male counterpart looked worried for a moment.

"Not to worry. We've done this before, they'll be fine. I'll call back tomorrow."

"Alrighty! Good-bye!" the two disconnected. Membrane looked down the hall as Gim stared at her.

"Something you aren't telling us, mom?"

She sighed. "Just don't tell your sister, she will need to figure this out on her own."

Gim growled. "Fine." With that, he walked into his room and shut the door.

((Next morning: Tam's house))

"Ok, one more time. Why can't I stay over at your house and work on the device with your mother?" Dib followed behind Deb on their way to the alien base on the other side of the neighborhood.

Deb turned around. "Because then you wouldn't be working on it with Zim. He made it before, he knows what to do."

"He knows what to—are we talking about the same Zim? The idiot that got himself stuck here along with his enemy?"

"Still, it'll be easier to keep you two together. And before you say 'why can't he go to your house' it's because all the technology he would've used is in Tam's base." Deb walked up the pathway and opened the door.

As soon as the door opened, GIR flew out, screaming as he crashed into the girl, causing her to fall back.

"DEBBY! Master and Zimmy are fighting, and master isn't ready for school and she didn't do her homework last night, so teacher man's gonna call robo mom and say 'your daughter's failing' and then she'll say 'no, not until you wash your hands' and it'll become all bad!" the panicked look quickly changed to a happy one. "I made you some panycakes!" he then proceeded to hop off Deb and skip into the house, leaving the two humans to follow.

As soon as they were all in the house and the door was closed, Zim and Tam fell through a giant hole in the ceiling, wrestling angrily.

Zim pulled on Tam's antennae. "How is it that my female half is such an imbecile!"

Tam grabbed Zim's eyelid and pulled, exposing the red eye laying behind. "Like you one to talk, you little—Deb!" Tam quickly got off of Zim as he let go of her antennae. "What are you doing here this late?"

"Late? Tam, we have school in ten minutes!"

"Oh, really? It's morning."

Deb shook her head before looking up. "Computer, how long have they been arguing like this?"

"8 hours, 27 minutes and 13 seconds." The deep voice boomed. After a second it snickered slightly. "You want to see how it started, that was pretty funny."

"Maybe later, right now, we have to go." Deb grabbed Tam's wig, which was thrown unceremonially on the couch, her contacts on the floor. She picked them up and handed them to Tam, who quickly put them in and followed Deb to the door.

Tam turned to the boys. "You two are going to work on the Dimension Transmitting Device. We'll come help you right after school. GIR!" the little robot jumped and landed in front of his master, saluting. "I have a special assignment for you." Tam took GIR out of the room and whispered something to the robot, so the other three couldn't hear her plan. GIR nodded happily, little bolts shaking in his head as he moved.

Tam stridden out of the room, GIR following until she opened the door and pushed Deb out. Looking back in, she bit back a smile, succeeding in transforming it into a smirk and stepped out the door, leaving the three alone.

"Well!" Zim stood up, brushing himself off, before looking at Dib. "We might as well get to work!"

((Tam's Lab))

The two boys worked quietly in the lab, backs to each other. GIR watched the two in his spot on the floor, a stuffed moose in his arms.

Looking over, he saw a pile of blue goo next to Zim. Thinking of what master said, he walked over to the goo, picked up a handful. And threw it at the back of Dib's head, before running back to his spot.

Dib felt the substance hit him and roll down the back of his neck. Turning quickly, he saw the goo next to Zim and growled. "Very mature, space boy!"

Zim turned, confused. "Wha?"

Dib scrapped some goop off the back of his head and threw it at Zim, hitting him between the eyes. Zim looked surprised as Dib smirked.

Casually, Zim took some of the blue gel into his hand, and threw it at Dib.

And so, the Great War began.

Angry shouts and insult turned into laughter and teasing. Without realizing it, the boys drifted closer to each other, until any goop they threw would just end up splattering against the other. Breathing in for a moment, Dib found his lips pressed against Zim's.

Without realizing it, his eyes slid closed and the gel in his hand was dropped in favor of the irken. Zim's reaction was very similar, if a little more eager, pulling the boy closer, making the kiss harder.

After a little while, both boys pulled away and stared at each other for a minute. Then, Dib fainted.

Tapan: Yay! They kissed. The last part was taken from Just Shoot Me. I thought it was cute, so I added it! Ok, review! I love reviews, they make me feel special!