- - - Grace - - -
"Come on Éowyn!" I cried, pulling on her arm. She resisted me which only made me more irritated. Letting out a huge sigh and stopped pulling on her arm. "What's up with this?" I cried, knowing she probably wouldn't recognize the phrase. "I thought you craved going to battle and proving you were worthy to kick some orc ass!"
Éowyn shook her head at me, tears starting to course down her face. We both sunk down to the ground, my gripping her arms and her holding her face. "What? What is it? What's wrong?" I asked her.
"I can't do it," she whispered finally. "I can't go."
I stood up, not mad, not anything. So I was going alone. I took one of her hands and squeezed it hard in mine. "I will be back."
Tears still coursed down her face silently as she squeezed my hand back. She wasn't even thinking about how Aragorn had told her to keep me there. I hoped she wouldn't remember until I was long gone. As I left I heard her whisper, "Good luck."
Once out of the caves, I took a quick look around to make sure no one was there. The coast was clear. Suddenly I looked down and my wrists and saw my scars. I wanted to make sure we all lived through this. I was ready for them to know the whole story. Walking to where I thought a storage-room might be, I started muttering to myself.
My blood is all around me
On my face and hair
It's gushing from my wrists
Does anybody care?
I used to hate the scars
Then I'd only bruise
But then I started cutting
Nothing left to lose
I've stopped running now
There's no where left to go
I'm sorry Mom, the floor is stained
With my blood flow
Wanting life is hopeless
I have no will to live
It's amazing all the abuse
Kids our age can give
I won't live with all the sorrow
I won't live with all the pain
I won't take another breath
My heart won't beat again ¹
I didn't even notice I had been speaking one of my poems aloud until I was almost at the end. It had been my favorite out of my poems. I had titled it Blood. I had memorized it because I was asked to read it aloud in class once. The teacher had thought I had written it out of imagination. Yeah, imagination. Sure. Whatever works for you.
Finally I walked into a storage-room (I checked to make sure there was no one inside first) and looked at the spare pieces of assorted chain mail and swords. I didn't need a sword, I had the elvish knives tucked into my belt. I took them out, whirling them in my hands for a minute. Then I realized I had to hurry so I wasn't caught.
Hurriedly, I pulled on some arm guards that I found that fit nicely enough. I figured that if I would be using my hands and wrists that much, I'd need extra protection. I couldn't find any mail that fit me properly so I had to settle for an extra shirt. Hoping that I wouldn't take a knife to the chest or back, I started to head out towards the open air where all the "soldiers" were.
As I went out into the open, I saw that men were opening the doors and a group of people were coming in. At first I thought it was the Uruk-hai until I took a closer look. Elves. Elves!?! What? From what I'd heard, men and elves didn't get along that well. And leading the group was Haldir. I almost ran to talk to him but stopped myself when I saw Legolas, Aragorn, and Gimli approaching him. I'd have to be pretty careful to pull this off.
- - - Haldir - - -
As we entered Helm's Deep, I approached Théoden King. He lowered his head respectfully when I approached him.
"It is said that men and elves once fought side by side as allies. We have come to honour that allegiance," I said to him and he looked up at me, seemingly impressed. I was not normally fond of humans but I was respectful to them. They had often felt resentment because of the Eldar were immortal and had keener senses. Men could not be immortal. They would kill each other off within one hundred years.
Legolas, Estel, and the dwarf, Gimli, came to speak with me.
"Welcome Haldir," Estel said. Legolas just clasped my arm in greeting. The dwarf grunted. Was that really how they greeted each other? They were not dignified enough for words?
I asked about Grace, for I had not forgotten her. I did not see her there and when I saw Legolas look up sharply there was something about it I did not like. Elves and humans did not mix. Stay to your own kind, I wanted to tell him. He knew me well enough to see I had noticed his reaction and know what I was thinking. He would have to be careful around me from now on.
As I studied the poorly prepared townsfolk, I heard the dwarf say, "It is said that humans were often jealous because of elves' immortality. Is it true?"
Aragorn nodded but said, "Humans can be immortal also, Gimli." I opened my mouth to protest. "Immortality isn't living forever. It is not fearing death. When you live forever, you do not fear death. Humans will always try to cheat death because they are afraid of it. They have always thought that being immortal meant living forever. Few are wise enough to see that it is not so."
Legolas nodded his agreement, his mind off somewhere else, I could tell. Maybe with Grace? I excused myself to explore the legendary Helm's Deep. I was walking, admiring the strong, thick wall, when I bumped into someone. I turned quickly to offer apologies. I found myself face to face with green-grey eyes. Eyes I recognised.
"Grace?" I asked, astonished.
"Haldir! Oh, my God! Don't tell Aragorn, please!"
I laughed. What had she done now? ""What should I not tell Estel?"
"Don't tell him you saw me. I'm not supposed to be here. They tried to send me to the caves. But I know how to fight with these -" I was astonished to see she held elvish blades "- and I couldn't just stay there and leave them alone. I don't care if they see me here once the battle's on. They can't just pick me up and take me to the caves then. I don't want to go to the caves, please Haldir, don't tell Aragorn or Gimli or Legolas!" Her eyes pleaded with me.
She had changed so much! Her dark, straight hair was longer and windblown. Her eyes were happier looking than I had ever seen them ever in Lothlórien. She was more willowy looking also. The Fellowship had done her good. My eyes swept her arms and as I had expected I saw scars on her wrists. But they were faint and wouldn't be obvious from a distance.
"Of course, mellonamin¹¹. I will not tell him if you ask me not to."
"Thank you so much, Haldir!" she cried, throwing her arms around my neck. It was very rare for me to let a human get close to me at all, let alone touch me. But with Grace, I found I did not mind. She was an alluring young girl, I saw now. Since leaving my forest with the Fellowship she had blossomed like a flower and I found that that side appealed to me. I could almost understand the attraction for her I had seen in Legolas.
"You have become very beautiful since I have last seen you, lothamin¹¹¹," I told her and I saw a blush creep up into her cheeks as she mumbled a thanks. After I silence between us, I knew I should take my leave. "Good luck in the battle. I will watch out for you."
"Good luck, Haldir," she said as she wrapped her arms around my neck once more. "It was great to see you." After brushing her lips across my cheek, she vanished. She had more of an effect on me than I wanted to admit, especially to Legolas.
I heard growling and thumping. As I made my way back to the outer wall, I could see everyone lining up. All my men had their bows out and armed. I knew the Uruk-hai had arrived at last.
(A/N: Yay! Like the chappy? Personally I thought it was kinda lame so I don't blame you if you do. Ppphhht, stupid me and my lamety! But anywho, REVIEW IT, no matter how lame it is!!! Until next time…)
¹ Another poem written by me. Please don't take without asking permission!
¹¹ Elvish. I don't know if it's correct but I hope so! Translation: my friend
¹¹¹ More elvish. Again, I don't know if it's correct but I hope so. Translation: my flower